How do you find a mentor?

Actually, yes it is.

I have an AWESOME mentor and I've paid her $8K this year so far.

To the OP:

Traditionally, coaching and consulting are defined as paid-for services and mentoring is a free service offered by someone who's taken a personal interest in you and is grooming you for success in an area in which they've also had success.

However, as business and the English language is always in flux, these definitions change and overlap regularly. Though the language might change slightly, the concepts are the same. And the caveats are the same:

1. Pick someone who's had legitimate success doing what you want to accomplish. This person is NOT your peer or friend. They're your teacher, an accomplished professional, someone to be listened to and respected.

2. Pick someone whom you can trust personally. If your intuition is squeaking at all, listen!

3. Pick someone who personally believes in what you're doing. This doesn't mean they have to be personally involved in your business. But there ARE people who will offer coaching/mentoring who don't always believe in what you're doing. (I just recently heard a story of a business coach offering coaching services to a psychic when they personally didn't believe in psychics.) There needs to be congruency between the coach's beliefs and actions (including who they choose to mentor).

4. Pick someone whom you personally resonate with. You can have two mentors who offer nearly identical services, are both great at what they do have the track record to back it up, have integrity, etc. But you may not resonate with one because of personal style or whatever. Be careful of signing up to coach with someone who truly just rubs you the wrong way. You might end up with a bad coaching experience.

Just some thoughts!

I adore my mentor! Not only do I love what she does, I love the WAY she does it. I also admire and respect her personal values. (She's built a 7-figure business while raising 4 kids.) She's all about using leverage in business, yet growing businesses gracefully. I wanna be like her when I grow up!

I also love her style and personality. She's soft-spoken and VERY feminine, which I love! (It's just a personal quirk, but I'm turned off by women with masculine qualities: i.e. super-short, masculine haircuts; women who pepper their speech with profanity; etc. I love to be feminine and admire women who are super successful while maintaining their feminine edge.)

I paid my mentor $7K for 6 months of coaching in Jan and that just concluded. (I normally don't have that kind of money, but I received an unexpected lump sum.) I just signed up for another 6 months for just $1K. (MUCH better! )

You might think I'm crazy, but it's worth it. Like most of us, I KNOW more than I need to. Training and education is no longer a problem for me. (Information overload!) I KNOW the how-to's. Now I need structure, accountability, someone to point me in the right direction when I get off-track or have questions and don't know which direction to go. Someone to talk sense into me when my fears and doubts threaten to choke the life out of me. (Mindsets!)

(This just recently happened on a group coaching call about 2 weeks ago. I felt stuck and my fears were growing by the minute until I felt paralyzed. I was terrified! Though I didn't say so in so many words on the call, she heard it in my voice. And she promptly went off on a tangent about how I was NOT alone and how I needed to keep moving forward. I nearly cried with relief.)

As you know, when you're starting a business, you generally can't talk about the details with just anyone. Especially the specifics of MONEY. Your run-of-the-mill friends, family and colleagues just don't "get it." Yet we need an outlet, someone we can talk to and get good feedback from. That's what a coach is for.

Also, AND THIS IS IMPORTANT: in the beginning, when you're just getting started, you're often worried and impatient, wondering if this is "really gonna work." The time between when we start the business and when the money starts coming in can be torture as you worry, doubt and second-guess yourself. Your mind WILL play games with you, no matter how much research you've done.

A coach is good to have at this point, because she'll keep you on track and moving forward during this crucial period. (Too often, we don't give our business and efforts enough time to do their job before giving up or moving to the next thing.)

You've already received a lot of good advice here about how to find a mentor. So I just decided to offer a different perspective.

Hope that helps!

Michelle