8 Habits Of People Who Want To Fail

34 replies
It's my lunch break, and I'm bored, so I'm reading Google News while responding to various posts here on the WF. I keep reading all of these awesome examples of really cool things you can do to be successful, but I know for a fact that not everyone wants to be successful.

I decided to compile my own list of things you can to do guarantee that you remain a failure or, at best, not successful, in your own life and business.

#1 - Don't Set Goals

What do I mean? Well, don't set goals! Duh! Throw out your calendar and your Post-It Notes. Get rid of Google Calendar (or Outlook or whatever you use) and forget about time altogether. The only time you need to worry about is Beer Thirty, which falls every single hour as far as you're concerned.

#2 - Wing Everything

That's right folks, screw having a plan. Don't outline it, don't even think about it. Just come up with a hare-brained scheme and run with it as fast and hard as you can. If it's wrong, who care?

#3 - Don't Take Action

I know this contradicts with #2, which calls for you to actually do something, but how can you fail if you don't contradict yourself? Instead, sit down and play the new World of Warcraft: Mists of Pandaria that's coming out at midnight tonight and don't worry about your business.

#4 - Don't Learn From Successful People

This means you need to quit reading school textbooks. Don't read Forbes, USA Today, or the NY Times. Stop it now! From now on, it's nothing but Mad Magazine and Cracked.com for you!

#5 - Don't Make Adjustments

Your course has kept you from succeeding up until now, so why change it? If you were going to get rich, you would've had a massive computer business like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, or Tom from My_____ before you were 21. (That's MySpace for you people who are following #4 and are still reading Cracked.com.) It's too late for you now, so just give up and read some more Star Trek fan fiction and blog about it to the Big Bang Theory guys. (And quit staring at Penny...she's married and/or engaged.)

#6 - Don't Move Past Your Mistakes

Did you girlfriend dump you for being boring like that guy in the Citibank commercial? Did you not get a job because you didn't show up for an interview? Are you fat because you forgot to quit eating?

Good! Stick with those mistakes and don't try anything new.

#7 - Self Improvement Is For Losers

The last thing in the world you need to worry about is making yourself a better person. Don't brush your teeth, buy new clothes, or tie your shoe laces. Get your mom to buy you some more of those Velcro shoes so you quit tripping, though. That causes injuries and you're not going to be rich enough to get health insurance.

#8 - Do NOT Celebrate You Successes

This should be easy enough if you follow steps 1-7, which will keep you from having any success at all. If you accidentally screw up and do something right, however, don't tell anyone. Don't take yourself out to eat, don't get your (fake) girlfriend to get into bed with you, and certainly don't acknowledge your own success.

------

I'm posting this in jest, but there are some good points here if you play the opposites game with my post. I actually did a little research and found a few lists of successful people and re-engineered them.

What are your thoughts?

-- j
#fail #habits #people
  • Profile picture of the author Kal Sallam
    People who want to fail? Who wants to fail?

    Great post though. My favorite is #4.
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    • Profile picture of the author theory expert
      Banned
      Originally Posted by Kal Sallam View Post

      People who want to fail? Who wants to fail?

      Great post though.
      People who fail. I doubt someone want to or wants to :rolleyes:
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    • Profile picture of the author TheArticlePros
      [DELETED]
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      • Profile picture of the author adsassist
        Originally Posted by JaRyCu View Post

        To make up a number and throw it out as fact, I'd say that 95% of the people reading this post have an inner-desire to fail. They don't know it, but if you watch their actions over the course of a week or a month, you'll notice that everything they do is designed to help them fail.

        -- j
        People may do things that will help them selfs to fail. I dont think they have a inner-desire to fail. I feel most are unclear on what to do to succeed. Resulting in taking actions on setting them selfs up for failure.
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      • Profile picture of the author glowworm
        Banned
        Originally Posted by JaRyCu View Post

        To make up a number and throw it out as fact, I'd say that 95% of the people reading this post have an inner-desire to fail. They don't know it, but if you watch their actions over the course of a week or a month, you'll notice that everything they do is designed to help them fail.

        -- j
        I'd say 99%, and that's conservative.
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      • Profile picture of the author JoeyXoto
        Originally Posted by JaRyCu View Post

        To make up a number and throw it out as fact, I'd say that 95% of the people reading this post have an inner-desire to fail. They don't know it, but if you watch their actions over the course of a week or a month, you'll notice that everything they do is designed to help them fail.

        -- j
        I agree. Some people are predisposed to literally winging about every little thing.

        Some people just turn off at the thought of hard work and effort; which sets them back into the 9-5, go to work, come home, eat, watch tv, sleep, rinse and repeat mentality.
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  • Profile picture of the author Ali2seas
    can not agree more
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  • Profile picture of the author LeonLion
    Now I feel bad about reading Cracked...
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    • Profile picture of the author TheArticlePros
      [DELETED]
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      • Profile picture of the author julianna
        This is a great post thanks!
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      • Profile picture of the author LeonLion
        Leon...I'm not replying to your comment, I'm replying to your sig. If you did the two pieces of art that you've linked, you are freakin' amazing!!!! This one was my favorite that I looked at so far:

        Rage by `AquaSixio on deviantART

        -- j
        JaRyCu,

        Those artists are my idols... I still have trouble with correct perspective. I'm glad you like them!
        Pst, check out Algenpfleger or Gate-to-Nowhere, if you want some more awesomeness.
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        • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
          Originally Posted by Kal Sallam View Post

          People who want to fail? Who wants to fail?
          Originally Posted by adsassist View Post

          People may do things that will help them selfs to fail. I dont think they have a inner-desire to fail. I feel most are unclear on what to do to succeed. Resulting in taking actions on setting them selfs up for failure.
          People may not consciously decide to fail. Actually failing after doing so would actually be success, which meant that they failed at failing after planning to fail and...

          What does happen, though, is that people who consistently take the actions (including inaction) that lead to failure are getting something out of it that is more important to them than changing and succeeding. They may not consciously know what it is, but it's there in their subconscious.

          As for #4...

          JaRyCu, you forgot surfing around looking for pictures of actresses' bare boobies. :p
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    • Profile picture of the author Joseph Robinson
      Banned
      Originally Posted by LeonLion View Post

      Now I feel bad about reading Cracked...
      Never feel bad about reading Cracked. It's a part of my daily routine. Heck, I credit them for some of the best writing techniques that I have learned.
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael D Forbes
    Really, there are plenty of posts on WaFo that are designed to help people succeed, it's about time that there is one that can help people that are going to fail, fail faster!

    Here's to falling flat on your faces! Hoorrah!
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  • Profile picture of the author RoseJBell84
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    • Profile picture of the author Horny Devil
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      Greetings brethren. Don't be despondent by this thread. There really is no need to fail.

      Coincidentally, I have a consignment of gold from Nigeria that I am looking for someone in the USA to take receipt of via Fedex Express. You will earn 50% of the shipment value which is $63zillion.

      If you are interested in having more money than Oprah Winfrey and have a double garage, kindly forward your name, address, telephone number, bank account details, pin number, and american handcuffs wrist size to . . . . .
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Ten
    Lololol. Yeah. What you just wrote is definitely good to look at! Take action!
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  • Profile picture of the author jeffonmission
    I think #6 should resonate with a lot of people. We definitely live in a culture that's afraid to make any mistakes whatsoever (hence why many Americans never learn a second language - the whole process is about making mistakes and being corrected along the way).

    Learning how to handle mistakes and failures is a big step to being successful. I even read today that the average failure rate for entrepreneurs is 3.2 attempts before being successful.
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  • Profile picture of the author liyong601c
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    • Profile picture of the author Joe R Piercey
      Thanks J,

      I realized I am not properly using habit #8, I could do with some more positive reinforcement...

      Joe
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  • Profile picture of the author seotothecore
    some people want to fail because it would mean they would have to be responsible for themselfs kal
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  • Profile picture of the author Simon Ashari
    Many failures are born of something in the subconscious. People don't set out to fail. There is just something in their actions (from fear) that will hold them back.

    Unfortunate.
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    • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
      Originally Posted by Simon Ashari View Post

      Many failures are born of something in the subconscious. People don't set out to fail. There is just something in their actions (from fear) that will hold them back.

      Unfortunate.
      According to some authorities, it isn't even fear that holds people back in many cases.

      The subconscious is a goal-seeking mechanism. Once it believes it knows what you want, it will do anything it can to get that. Somewhere back there, the subconscious sees a bigger payoff for not accomplishing something the conscious says it wants than for accomplishing it.

      I had a bout of insomnia last night, and caught a piece of a movie (I think - I wasn't all that wide awake) about an athlete that wanted to go pro. She kept telling herself that she was as good as the pros, but she just couldn't get a chance. When she finally got the chance, she sabotaged herself into almost blowing it. Preserving the idea that she was good enough was more important to her than finding out for sure. Being a movie, a figure in her life explained all this to her, she went forward and made it to the pros. Cue triumphant happy ending music and roll the credits...

      Taking the original headline from this thread, it's not so much that people want to fail. Their subconscious just wants something besides 'success' more. Find out what it is, if you can, resolve the issue within yourself and move forward. (Obviously, easier said than done.)
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      • Profile picture of the author Steve Lim
        Hi, I think the "Take action" is one of the important key, a lot of the marketers just searching around, keep on studying or looking for new techniques... but just haven't really make a decision to take action.

        We should make a schedule on daily basis, and follow through the plan, and I believe all of us can make it.
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  • Profile picture of the author Randall Magwood
    #9 - Giving advice that you don't even follow

    I have a cousin like this. Talks a big game about "what he would do"... but never does it. And no... he doesn't get paid for it.
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  • Profile picture of the author contentwriting360
    Banned
    HAHA... Great post, Jason. Great post. Now, that's what boredom can do.
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  • Profile picture of the author Joseph Robinson
    Banned
    This is a scam. I followed all 8 steps and failed. Which means I succeeded, which means I didn't fail!
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  • Profile picture of the author MakeMoneyKid
    The WORST of all is the habit is just reading, reading, and reading, and not taking any action! Unsurprisingly, I'm the one of them
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    • Profile picture of the author Joseph Robinson
      Banned
      Originally Posted by MakeMoneyKid View Post

      The WORST of all is the habit is just reading, reading, and reading, and not taking any action! Unsurprisingly, I'm the one of them
      At least you were smart enough to remove the "I'm a 6 figure marketer" bit from your blog before admitting this.
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    • Profile picture of the author Horny Devil
      Banned
      Originally Posted by MakeMoneyKid View Post

      The WORST of all is the habit is just reading, reading, and reading, and not taking any action! Unsurprisingly, I'm the one of them
      Books with words seem to go down well with me. Have you tried them yet?
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  • Profile picture of the author Making iMoney
    There is also one thing "greed", we target many things at one time this is also a main reason of failure.
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  • Profile picture of the author Chris Jerrett
    #7 - Self Improvement Is For Losers - I used to think this, but I find myself spending more and more of my free time on self improvement lately. Especially concerning the Law Of Attraction. Now you may or may not believe in this yourself, but it works for me.

    I think a lot of people want to take action, but they are procrastinators because they get overwhelmed. There are just too many choices. Which niche to enter? Am I doing it right? When will I see results? etc. Sometimes it's better to just have a simple plan and stick to it.
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  • Profile picture of the author HostWind
    This is certainly a good list. Unfortunately, it is exceedingly more difficult to put into action.
    The idiot who takes action is a step ahead of the intelligent reader.
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  • Profile picture of the author Joseph Robinson
    Banned
    Jason, I have a WSO you'd be interested. Here's a sneak peak:



    (Crayons are the upsell)
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    • Profile picture of the author Horny Devil
      Banned
      Originally Posted by Joseph Robinson View Post

      Jason, I have a WSO you'd be interested. Here's a sneak peak:



      (Crayons are the upsell)
      Is that a cactus on the table or are you doubly happy to see me.
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  • Profile picture of the author screamingfingers
    That was excellent! #'s 4 & 5 are great.
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  • Profile picture of the author wave carl
    do it or fail. Happy go lucky drama...#1 - Don't Set Goals
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