20 {{ upvoteCount | shortNum }}
20 {{ upvoteCount | shortNum }}

How to lose the fear about what other prople think ?

by Kike58
17 replies
This is one of my problems that my actions are dictated by others , more than by others by what other people will think about me .

This fear makes me feel panic everytime i tryto drive because i´m not confident as i haven´t driven for several years , i´m always thinking about what other drivers are going to think about my poor skills in the car.

The same happens as well in other areas of my life , sometimes i don´t dare to do things because of what others will think .

Has anyone the same problem ? which advice do you have for my situation ?

Thank you
#fear #lose #prople
  • Profile picture of the author RogozRazvan
    How old are you?

    (The reason why I'm asking this is because social pressure is a normal thing up to a certain age. It is how we are wired. After a while, you learn not to give a damn).

    Apart from this, build your self-esteem.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9910398].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author DWaters
    Often the first step in solving a personal problem is to recognize that you have one. It seems like you obviously know specific issue you have and that is winning half the battle.

    Once YOU decide to not be concerned with the thoughts of other people than you will feel better.
    Signature
    How I really Make Money With Amazon

    Want to get rich with top rated FREE Super Affiliate Training?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9910406].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Kike58
      I´m 25 . Thanks for your answers . I Know admitting the problem is half of the battle but is the other half the one that is hard for me.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9910566].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author bobandnanci
    Deciding to run your life without worrying about what others think is difficult for all of us, no matter how old we are. Actually, I think, that it has become harder in the era of social media because we are driven to be "liked" on the status updates that we post.

    What I have found though, is that you step into your own power and you decide that you respect yourself and then what other people think becomes their problem and not yours.

    As for driving, I will give you a bit of advice that I got from my Dad. If they are behind you, that's their problem, just hold your lane.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9910710].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Kike58
      Originally Posted by bobandnanci View Post

      Deciding to run your life without worrying about what others think is difficult for all of us, no matter how old we are. Actually, I think, that it has become harder in the era of social media because we are driven to be "liked" on the status updates that we post.

      What I have found though, is that you step into your own power and you decide that you respect yourself and then what other people think becomes their problem and not yours.

      As for driving, I will give you a bit of advice that I got from my Dad. If they are behind you, that's their problem, just hold your lane.

      Nice advice , it will help me , thanks.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9911960].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    people really only think about you..when ther need you for something ..when you annoy them ..or when they are wondering if and what you are thinking about them..

    as for driving i live in massachusetts ..we tend not to think anyone else here knows how to drive ..
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9912948].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Trey Morgan
    Other than reading books on this topic, I would recommend consistent exposure therapy. Expose yourself to your fear over and over, little by little, and eventually you'll get to a point where you will wonder why you ever had such a fear.
    Signature
    [Affordable Coaching] How To Make Money Online Doing What You Love
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9914924].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ctadvert
      Originally Posted by Trey Morgan View Post

      Other than reading books on this topic, I would recommend consistent exposure therapy. Expose yourself to your fear over and over, little by little, and eventually you'll get to a point where you will wonder why you ever had such a fear.
      Absolutly spot on Trey, think about it as kids you learn right one way or another you learn throughout your life, someone teaches you, you make a mistake you learn not to do it again, you fall off your bike you get back on. My dad well step dad tought us how to swim by throwing us in the deep end of the swimming baths, obviously he was never going to let anything happen to us, but it's a quick way of learning and ever since it's the only way I have lerned by going in head first

      What i'm trying to say is, face your fear head first, what makes you nervous is an issue alot of people get/got in fact I used to be like it, until around 5 years ago (another story) not one person truly loves themselves in all honesty if they do avoid them.

      My advice, go with a trusted friend (very important) to a busy town centre with a script "Hi my name is ........ I have a fear of ........ and i am standing here today to face that fear out of my own will ......... I have my friend here for support and who I could not do this without ....... I urge anyone who suffers any sort of emotional pain or blockages to do the exact same thing.

      This will not only dramatically improve your cofidence but you may possibly make new friends...

      Sometimes life brings the best out of the worst situations

      TRY IT
      Signature

      OK, so I did it, I finally got over myself.

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9915030].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sunray
    I'd strongly advise you try the Sedona Method. They specifically release this "wanting approval" among other issues. You'll learn to drop it very quickly, and you WILL become free of it. I have a small article on it on my website too: What is the Sedona Method? | Quantum Mind Success
    Signature
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9915002].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author JimsonWright
    I've experienced this when I was younger. I guess aging has been helpful and also being surrounded by supportive people. That has been one of the most useful things for me. I guess as you grow older you have to surround yourself with like-minded people.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9917810].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Kike58
      Thanks a lot everyone for your support and ideas .

      It's not going to be easy but it's my life and my objetives so to hell what the people will think about me !!!!

      I just need to ask myself if i'm happy with myself and my attitude.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9918286].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    Banned
    Like Razvan suggested, consider working on your
    self-esteem. (I know that when I went from low to
    moderate/high self-esteem other people's opinions
    didn't matter as much to me ...)

    Other than that, I would recommend … Knowing
    exactly what you want to do in life … And staying
    focussed on that. Your "dream." Your "Life
    Purpose." Everything you want to accomplish.
    When you have a strong sense of who you are,
    what you're all about, and where you're going in life,
    other people’s opinions will not matter as much.

    (HTH.)
    Signature
    "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9918456].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Kike58
      Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

      Like Razvan suggested, consider working on your
      self-esteem. (I know that when I went from low to
      moderate/high self-esteem other people's opinions
      didn't matter as much to me ...)

      Other than that, I would recommend ... Knowing
      exactly what you want to do in life ... And staying
      focussed on that. Your "dream." Your "Life
      Purpose." Everything you want to accomplish.
      When you have a strong sense of who you are,
      what you're all about, and where you're going in life,
      other people's opinions will not matter as much.

      (HTH.)
      This is exactly what is helping me , that now i really know what i want and nobody/nothing is going to stop me !!!!!
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9918625].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
        Banned
        Originally Posted by Kike58 View Post

        This is exactly what is helping me , that now i really know what i want and nobody/nothing is going to stop me !!!!!


        Cool. Keep going then. : )
        Signature
        "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9918632].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author PureFusion
    Whenever I feel I'm getting hung up by what other people think I always remember this quote.

    "Those Who Mind Don't Matter, and Those Who Matter Don't Mind"

    You may know the person who said this as Dr. Seuss, and his words speak so true. Keep pushing forward in your ventures and mind not those who mind you!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9919322].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author RichBeck
    Fear is a common emotion... The important thing is what you do with that fear....

    You can "embrace" it and let it take you on a downward spiral.... or you can "acknowledge" it and shift your focus to your goals for the future....

    But, keep this in mind.... No matter what you do..... How "perfect" you are....

    Some people will dislike you....

    Some people will be indifferent....

    Some will like you.....

    You will always have these groups.... That is just the way it is....

    The key is to focus on those who like you... and ignore the rest....

    I know it is much easier said than done.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9919620].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author AwanR
    I think fear is a good entry point to understand about yourself.
    In my personal experience, meditation help me a lot to understand about it.
    I come to it wanting to get rid of my fear, but as time goes it open way into inner journey.
    Fear is one of my guru to understand me.
    It serve it purpose, and when it no longer serve me I can choose to leave it with compassion.

    Cheers,
    Awan
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9919640].message }}

Trending Topics