I'm 36 and never seen it! What's wrong with me
She comments to me that the stuff I'm always saying sounds like Fight Club stuff. So I watched it last night.
It was ridiculously amazing.
I can see how it can be applied in so many different ways, to so many different stories of being human...for me, here were some of the things that hit me...
The standing outside the house. Waiting to get in. Denying self. Being yelled at, criticized, told to f*ck off.
I saw it as how it feels when you are stepping up to choose a better future, you stand at the door of the universe, willing and asking for change. It seems the universe hates you. It pushes back. You get a lot of criticism. You are told to just f off.
Some people stand there, unmoved. They focus. Focus on their desire. Their desire outweighs anything the supposed universe can do to them, say to them. Then one day, it steps up to them and says, come in.
Others get that first yelling at and turn, head down, walk away.
Then there's the losing. Losing everything. The killing off of all that we use to define us outside of our character, our self.
I realized some similarity with my poetry from a year ago. I wrote about things I thought I understood and wrote about them well as though I had lived them. Then I lived them. And really understood the depth of the experience and pain. And my poetry meant more then ever.
Theory is one thing. Practice is when we really begin to learn and understand and grow.
But the rule. The rule is don't talk about fight club. It's like this book I'm reading "Appreciate Your Life" where the author discusses how the practice of Sitting involves not talking about it, not thinking about it, DOING it.
It's not so much about keeping fight club a secret.
It's about "doing" over "talking".
Don't talk about fight club. Be fight club. Do fight club. Fight.
Most people talk and live a life of talk, of a theory of understanding, but the real life begins when talk ends and action is engaged.
Make it a first rule in your life...to not talk about fight club.