You Can't Control What Happens To You

8 years ago

"By choosing how to
respond to Life instead of having events control you." I totally agree with this. Don't let any situation or unfortunate events control your life.

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Odahh

8 years ago

that is where the word responsibility ..fits.. it has nothing to do with blame..it is everything about taking control of how you respond to how things happen to you ..

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RyleyDonkersgoed

8 years ago

Powerful stuff! That is something that I all ways remind myself of. I can't control the things outside of me, but I can control my actions and reactions and also my mindset.

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liezlekate

8 years ago

You can't control what happens to you but you can control your emotions to everything that happens. We really don't have the power over everything. All we can do is be positive and know that whether good or bad, things happen for a reason.

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sebaustinmartinez

8 years ago

It's all about taking control of our emotions. We should not let anything control us. It's our life and ours alone.

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hoabantrang

8 years ago

Sadly that I still cannot control what happen to me.

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Kezzielee

8 years ago

really inspirational, thank you. I always say you cant control others or situations but you can control how you react to them and like you say ultimately that is where the magic lies.

I love how you talk about more failures lead to more success, its something i have come to learn, realising that theres no need to be scared to fail!

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Jonathan 2.0

Banned 8 years ago

Cool. Seems like most of you Guys understood my post.
: )

I say "seems" because if you don't agree this is one of the most influential posts I could ever share with you, then you haven't grasped the full significance of it.

That's OK. I'm happy with just planting the "seed" in peoples' minds. There may come a time when you think about what I shared and it will be given new meaning. : )

Originally Posted by hoabantrang

Sadly that I still cannot control what happen to me.

I’ve been there. If I have learned anything its that everything happens for a reason. Right now you may be thinking that your situation can't change but ultimately – if you take a mindset of learning – you will overcome all your problems.

Sorry I couldn’t be more helpful. Feel free to PM me if you need more guidance. : )

Originally Posted by Odahh

that is where the word responsibility ..fits.. it has nothing to do with blame..it is everything about taking control of how you respond to how things happen to you ..

Absolutely. That's an important aspect. I think it was W. Clement Stone ("The Success Principles") who introduced me into the concept of taking personal responsibility for my Life. When you do that, you can create, un-create, and re-create anything at will.

I should have titled this post as being: "You can't always control what happens to you." It's my belief that you can influence what happens to you by virtue of the thoughts and actions that you take. Thanks for the post Odahh. : )

Originally Posted by Kezzielee

really inspirational, thank you. I always say you cant control others or situations but you can control how you react to them and like you say ultimately that is where the magic lies.

I love how you talk about more failures lead to more success, its something i have come to learn, realising that theres no need to be scared to fail!

Welcome. : ) Sometimes “failure” can be scary. However when you take the attitude that it’s something that will make you more successful, it loses all that power and transforms it into something for your benefit.

Thanks
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wordsandthebees

8 years ago

Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0

Cool. Seems like most of you Guys understood my post.
: )

I say "seems" because if you don't agree this is one of the most influential posts I could ever share with you, then you haven't grasped the full significance of it.

While I agree with you that we can't control what happens to us, and in the majority of cases we can control how we react to it; what we definitely CANNOT control is how other people react to what they see, feel, hear and experience.

Any person that puts their faith into the expected reaction of another human being is setting themselves up for a fall. Parents, siblings, partners included - you will never be able to 100% rely on another human being; much as we'd like to, I don't think we can even fully rely on ourselves. Even the most controlled and disciplined of people will still have their moments.

I think your post is extremely influential and, for the most part, I agree wholeheartedly!

Thanks for the thread

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avasummerdiaz

8 years ago

That's true. That's why we have to focus on what is happening at the present and be mindless of what might happen in the future. Let's all be surprised and just enjoy eve moment we're living. We can't turn back the time, after all.

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felisitie

8 years ago

Awesome post! I am encouraged not to give up because of adversities that may come my way and not to let them define me because the power to overcome them lies within me.

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JDNinjaMarketing

8 years ago

You're right. You definitely cant control what happens to you but by keeping a positive mindset you can control your reactions to what happens

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blakesienna 8 years ago

There are really a lot of things that is beyond our control. All we can control is our response towards it. Avoid worrying and remember that everything's happen for a reason.
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Anthony Shama

8 years ago

first thank you for sharing such a great lesson.
i learn this lesson only 1 year ago, after watching the movie : the shift by wayne dyer. i learn then that event is neutral on it own, we are the one giving it meaning. and we are free to choose how we respond to that situation according to the meaning we give to it.

However, it is easy to said than done. even we know this lesson, but applying it with every situation require more than just knowing. it is a simple thought, but don't expect it to be easy. it requires constant practicing, just like any other skill. Even wayne himself mention that he cannot control his response each and every time as well, but don't be discourage because the longer you practice, the more percentage of time you can control your response. you may start from 1 control in 100 events, and after 2 to 3 years of practice, you may reach 60 control in 100 events, and that is a good progress. so keep your practice.

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Samsmiles

8 years ago

Hi Jonathan

As someone who has suffered a heart attack, had a double heart bypass, and is the proud possessor of a mechanical heart valve: who also has had a goodly part of his gut removed and now poos in a bag, I agree with you 110%!!
I am a walking talking freeking miracle!
If your interested with how I have coped with my little problems I have recently started a blog at http://helpurself2success.com

Best regards

Dave (alias samsmiles)

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Jonathan 2.0 Banned 8 years ago

Hey Dave. Thanks for contributing. Just had a quick look at your Blog - Great stuff. : )
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Ron Lafuddy

8 years ago

Originally Posted by Samsmiles

Hi Jonathan

As someone who has suffered a heart attack, had a double heart bypass, and is the proud possessor of a mechanical heart valve: who also has had a goodly part of his gut removed and now poos in a bag, I agree with you 110%!!
I am a walking talking freeking miracle!
If your interested with how I have coped with my little problems I have recently started a blog at http://helpurself2success.com

Best regards

Dave (alias samsmiles)

Good for you, Dave!

As the hippies used to say "Keep on Truckin'!", my friend.

I'll check out your blog, too!

Ron

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Samsmiles

8 years ago

Jonathan, Ron,
Thanks for your kind comments. If anybody has a procrastination problem see my latest post at http://helpurself2success.com

Thanks

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Froggys

8 years ago

Just try to stay focused, and that's all. Improve yourself everyday, it doesn't matter is it ten or one step to improving, step is step, small or big! Just don't go downstairs!

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Master Blake

8 years ago

More often than not, failure is something you can leverage to become greater.

Sometimes, you may not realize you've become great due to your struggles.

AHA!

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Jonathan 2.0

Banned 8 years ago

Originally Posted by Master Blake

Sometimes, you may not realize you've become great due to your struggles.

Amen. Years ago when I was struggling with my illness I thought I was a hopeless wretch. (And I kind of was.) However looking back I could see how much I've accomplished.

So my message to people reading who may be struggling in Life, keep going. (As Winston Churchill said: "If you're going through Hell, keep going." Many people don't realize how amazing they are. : ) Thanks for the most MB.

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Master Blake

8 years ago

Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0

Amen. Years ago when I was struggling with my illness I thought I was a hopeless wretch. (And I kind of was.) However looking back I could see how much I've accomplished.

So my message to people reading who may be struggling in Life, keep going. (As Winston Churchill said: "If you're going through Hell, keep going." Many people don't realize how amazing they are. : ) Thanks for the most MB.

Keep Going
Keep Walking

Keep at it.

Sure, you might have a couple or a dozen of scars from the field.

But my sharp pen says, "you write history".

Better fall from 2000 meters - than...
stumble
and
DIE!

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Jonathan 2.0 Banned 8 years ago

Originally Posted by Master Blake

But my sharp pen says, "you write history".

Every day of our lives is a blank sheet that we can write anything that we want.

Thanks.
Jonathan
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John Jonas Phil VA

8 years ago

How you look at life also affects the outcome. If you choose to focus on the best of people, most of the time they would rise to the challenge. If you only expect the worst from people then that's what you'll always get.

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Chillidude

8 years ago

Originally Posted by John Jonas Phil VA

How you look at life also affects the outcome. If you choose to focus on the best of people, most of the time they would rise to the challenge. If you only expect the worst from people then that's what you'll always get.

This.

At least when it comes to social interactions I believe that you can, to a great degree, influence both what happens to you, and how you take on the world.

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Princess Balestra

8 years ago

It is true: we are all closed loops, fluxin' out on rendez-vouses in a void mutually agreed as existent yet not formed of terrain any twoa us can touch on simultaneously.

It is as if we are the custodiansa the smartest mirages ever.

Thing is, when you meet someone, you are prolly reactin' to them reactin' to you.

So I would wanna smile, if I can.

I cannot change who I meet, but I can want to wish them well — not in order to have power over them but to smooth up the adventure kinda passively.

I would not wanna be insincere in this, usin' eyes an' teeth as a meansa control.

I am thinkin' mebbe of naive smilin' — sum disposition of minor goodwill, wished for with an iron pumped routine of minimal effort an' justa thought, sum simple desire, that mebbe we all could have if we wished it so.

If pursued without manaical glee — warmin' eyes an' lips fulla antirictus — I figure we got a superindirect meansa control here.

We do not demand anythin' of anyone we meet.

We merely wish to be sweet.

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Odahh

8 years ago

been a while ...you can't control..but you can contribute ..and provide conditions

if you want to be poor and desperate your life..spend every dime you make ..and borrow money so you are spending 3to 4 times what the item costs ..hell smoke a pack of cigs a day ..or buy 1 from people for a 1 a cig ..

want to get really fat get treatment with antibiotic that wipe out your gut flora then eat heavily processed food and diet soda of course ..and use the law of attraction to get the closest parking spot you can to minimize the amount of walking you do ..

you can't control the events of the world bt you can develop self control

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Morna Donaghue

Banned 8 years ago

Yes you can't control things but you can control your reactions and how you would deal with it.

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ivanadee

8 years ago

Yes! Just focus on what we can control and in this case, it's our mind and attitude. Thanks for pointing this out

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Froggys

8 years ago

Guys,how you deal with problems and stuff happening in your life shows what kind of person you are,there are only weak people and strong people.

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Jonathan 2.0 Banned 8 years ago

Originally Posted by Froggys

Guys, how you deal with problems and stuff happening in your life shows what kind of person you are, there are only weak people and strong people.

I guess that's true. However at the same time I think a "weak" person can always become a "strong" person. One of the most important components is High Self-Esteem.
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diaz212

8 years ago

we can control what happen to out life, the only answer is. Be strong !

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roeegol 8 years ago

Stephen Covey says in hi "7 Habits of Highly Successful people" that between what happens to you and your response, there's a gap. In that gap you're free to choose how you react to what happens to you.

We are the ones that give consent to others to upset us, annoy us, make us angry etc.
This is not easy but with time and practice you can train your mental muscle to choose how you response to what happens to you.
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