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Learning How To Forgive Others

by Duncan93
11 replies
We have all come to a point where someone has wronged us and we feel like we do not want to forgive them. Or we cannot even bear the thought of talking to them. Most of the time you feel hatred towards that person.

Without knowing you will find that you are doing more harm to your life than to that person. This is why you need to learn how to forgive others

Forgiving someone is not something that you do for others. It is something that you do for yourself.

Steps on Learning How to forgive.


Accept what happened

Empathize

Letting go

Feel compassion for the person



QUOTES TO HELP YOU IN FORGIVENESS.

Do not keep thinking of the past or the bad thing that happened; when you let go of it, you get over the anger/bitterness that you felt and it clears the path of forgiveness! The best thing is time! –Ashna Singh

Remind yourself of how much forgiveness would mean to you if it was your turn for a mistake! –Carol Mcbride-Safford

Because it takes less energy to love and forgive than it does to stay angry and hold a grudge.It brings peace to your life. –Linda Adams

Tell me in the comments below how you forgive others.
#forgive #learning
  • Profile picture of the author Daniel Evans
    The power of forgiveness can't be underestimated.

    As you say, ultimately it's about forgiving the self. Once a person forgives themselves, they cease projecting their guilt and it cuts the destructive loop.

    People needn't even have someone wrong them to hold bitterness. They may just find people in any walk of life to dump their insecurities upon. There are many people here doing that under the supposed guise of a shrewd 'business person' who, in reality, are only projecting their failures and consequential frustrations.

    The beginning and the end is the self - the mind, We need to master it to gain leverage over everything else in life. This is the 'force'. It is the atonement and the Tao.
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  • Profile picture of the author CherylMoses
    I use to be a grudge holder but now I forgive effortlessly. It gives me a sense of freedom that I enjoy having within myself. I just believe in letting go as opposed to keeping things bottled up for some time. It doesn't do you any good and it surely doesn't hurt the other person.
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  • Profile picture of the author John Jonas Phil VA
    I remind myself that holding on grudges only hurts me, not them. It burdens me, not them. And forgiveness would allow me to let go of all that baggage and move on to better things.
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  • Profile picture of the author princetotem
    As a Buddhist, I see holding onto grudges as a very specific type of poison. There is nothing wrong in experiencing natural feelings such as anger and disappointment after you are wronged, but holding onto these negative feelings impact you. This in turn, impacts your feelings, thoughts, actions and happiness.

    The most important thing I've learnt about forgiveness is it is something that you give to yourself. It is a gift to yourself and not something you are 'giving away' to the person who has wronged you. It also makes you strong and not weak. It is the perspective of forgiveness that can help you to move on.
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  • Profile picture of the author dandagger
    Originally Posted by Duncan93 View Post

    Empathize

    Letting go

    Feel compassion for the person
    What if the other person is a full-on psychopath?
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    Hope you have a prosperous 2017!

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  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    Banned
    Originally Posted by Duncan93 View Post

    Forgiving someone is not something that you do for others. It is something that you do for yourself.

    Interesting point. When I forgive others I do so to help them. Although it's beneficial for me that's not the reason.
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    "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
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    • Profile picture of the author princetotem
      Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

      Interesting point. When I forgive others I do so to help them. Although it's beneficial for me that's not the reason.
      From trauma related experiences, I found that putting myself first, even with forgiveness, allowed me to eventually let go. As a victim of trauma, the last thing I wanted to do was to help the other person. By changing my initial perspective on forgiveness it allowed me to be open to that journey.
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  • Profile picture of the author NestZone
    Most often I just ignore.
    But more than often it keeps ringing behind my mind.
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  • Profile picture of the author neshaword
    I believe in the Good Karma principle with all of my heart and soul. This is not a religious thing, but rather a universal principle you should use in both private and business life. You did me wrong my friend, OK but not OK. I have to let it go, because negative thoughts and feeling of retribution are hurting me both mentally and physically. Good Karma will take care of you by introducing her twin sister Bad Karma. It may sound ridiculous, but I really believe in this one. I do not want to hurt other people because it would make me feel bad and I am afraid that Bad Karma could hit me back. On the other side, I do not have time for negative thoughts. Everyone will get what he or she deserves, this way or another, sooner or later. Peace with you and positive thoughts! N
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  • Profile picture of the author Sara20
    I think, forgiving is the main power in our life! I think it is a freedom, also it is a very important way in your possibilities!
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  • Profile picture of the author gingerninjas
    Originally Posted by Duncan93 View Post


    Steps on Learning How to forgive.


    Accept what happened

    Empathize

    Letting go

    Feel compassion for the person

    .
    Failing to forgive can take so much more energy personally and professionally that accepting what is and moving forward.

    The definition: "Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well."

    I know plenty of people that use their energy up fighting clients, failing to just forgive and move on. Personally, I feel like there is so much to be gained from allowing the act of forgiveness to take place to forge forward and focus on more important issues.

    Accepting what has happened in most cases and going with the flow allows for a more fluid experience and compassion will often allow a range of outcomes.

    I am all for supporting and focusing on forgiveness in all areas of work and life, it's essential for balance.
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