How being less needy makes you 900% more appealing in IM?

5 replies
When I started, I was needy and clingy. I'd address my clients with "Please" and email them unnecessarily to feed my "nicer guy" within. I'd give them 6-liner replies while they only messaged back with one-liner poops.

I thought maybe that comes under the "good customer service" clause..or the "How to close a deal" tactic...

It was not late when I figured out that neediness is the single strongest factor that repels people. They sense it in your words, in your tones, in your bones and even in your keyboard stroking speed. And when they smell it, you immediately fall to the lowest a water well can go. You become an ant, and they become the boot you bump into.

What is it about a needy guy that makes him so unattractive in IM?

The very fact that he can't hold himself in high esteem.

How to spot the needy in you?

Are you doing the following things:
  • Taking too much time on convincing someone why they should choose you. Putting in all the efforts, begging and negotiating even after the client/customer has said "No". This also includes lowering down your price and charging lower than what you usually charge. Usually, this is accompanied with an anxiety attack where your heart races, your brain boils in frenzy and your hands type faster; all because your "needy-instinct" can't lose this deal.
  • Conveying irrelevant information to your client which YOU think will sound impressive. This also includes advertising about your qualities without them asking for it.
  • Always making yourself available to everyone...and thinking it's the right way to socialize.
  • Using words like "Please" that sounds like begging and making apologies all the time.
  • Getting hurt when reality falls short of expectation.
  • Working on someone else's mission instead of working on yours (most part of the day).
  • Fearing a "No" and a miser in saying "No" to others.
etc etc..

The list can go on. But...

What super powers unleash when you stop being a needy?

1. You care less about losing

When you care less about losing, the winning envies and embraces you. This gives you unbelievable confidence in yourself and your abilities. The confidence starts reflecting in your talks, in your tone, and in your body language too; making you irresistible, invincible and authoritative. What follows is the no-defying urge of your prospects to empty their wallets on you.

2. It makes you 900% more appealing

Why?

Because they can't reach you.

And you are on the highest mountain...swaying inside cloud nine..

And they have to run for you. Grasp you and ask for your requirements...and bow in front of them....just because you have that charm the needy guy only fantasize about.


3. It gives you speed

You become so fond of risk-taking that it becomes your 6th sense. ..and this gives you speed.

And speed makes money its bitch.

Neediness is so stinky you can smell it yards away. And whenever you start doing it, you will smell it too. Your gut will tell you. Start with consciously suppressing it whenever it comes. Soon, the results will come in.. And you would realize it's the strongest super power a man can possess.

Junaid
#900% #appealing #makes #needy
  • Profile picture of the author jjones111
    I agree ... Most of the problems you mentioned are quite easy to spot and hurt a lot of marketers, but basically an unbridled risk-taking is not too good either and unless you really know what you are doing, it could cost you dearly, especially if you are only starting out!
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    • Profile picture of the author Junaid khawaja
      Originally Posted by jjones111 View Post

      I agree ... Most of the problems you mentioned are quite easy to spot and hurt a lot of marketers, but basically an unbridled risk-taking is not too good either and unless you really know what you are doing, it could cost you dearly, especially if you are only starting out!
      Hi Jones, absolutely right. Uncalculated moves can hit back hard.

      I think there is a very thin line between thinking and overthinking. Most of the newbies chase perfection (because they are needy to the level of greed), and when they never achieve it, they lose the motivation.

      Nice addition Jones!
      Thanks
      -J
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  • Profile picture of the author Reimaru
    Yeah, I can imagine how neediness is a turn off. I mean, I've met people who seem to beg for attention with every ordinary interaction. One of my old college friends was like that, and she had a difficult time landing a job (and I landed my first job when I didn't even want one yet!).

    Anyway, yeah, learning to not care about losing and just taking risks without caring about the results may lead to more failures... but it brings FAR more successes.
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    • Profile picture of the author Junaid khawaja
      You summarize that up brilliantly!

      The "neediness" rule can be applied anywhere in life - be it relationships, be it IM, be it landing a job or be it getting your Ex back, lol.
      Being less needy makes you appealing. But there is a catch...

      Even if you are not needy, but you are someone without a mission or a goal; this also makes you a "turn off." The minions won't come for you until you have both of these qualities: Less needy and more goal-oriented.

      Thanks
      -J
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  • Profile picture of the author MeelisM
    That's true in everything in life

    You must have consistency in what you're doing, but you have to be willing to let go of the result in this very moment. You know what you want to achieve, but if this person right now doesn't buy, it's his loss.

    I will do my best anyway and go on.

    Whole life is a numbers' game and if you stress about the results they only become worse.

    Let go of the stress and anxiety, work hard and you will succeed

    MeelisM
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