Need advice!I struggle to make something with my life...

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Hi guys! My name is Paul and I live in Romania.
During all my life I've tried to make something with my life, to learn something to do, to be the best...But I have failed in everything...
I've tried to learn to be a programmer (but didn't work anything).
I've tried to be a freelancer in work(but I've earned 20 dolars in 2 years, and now my account is suspended)
I've tried to make some money online, but from personal reasons(religious), I don't work between Friday-Saturday...So I can't have an online business...
I struggle every day ...what to learn to make my life better? WHAT TO learn to do something? ...But nothing works...

Please give me advice....Thank you!
#advicei #life #make #struggle
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  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    Ok fine what would you need to earn per month in USD terms to have a good life in Romania.

    And
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    • Profile picture of the author aniculaesei
      Hi!About 1000e!(medium income/person)
      Thank you for your time!

      Thank you !
      I will do that!

      Thank you for your time!
      Do you earn a medium-income with trading?
      Thank you!

      Wow!
      Thank you for your time!
      It is very helpful for me!
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by aniculaesei View Post

        Hi!About 1000e!(medium income/person)
        Thank you for your time!

        Thank you for your time!
        Do you earn a medium-income with trading?
        Thank you!
        Not yet, just staying with a few promising companies, ironing out the bugs, and setting myself up for the profits, when they appear.

        Although trading isn't really an income, since the more you make the more you make, or $1000 equity may make $50, while $2000, will double that or $100; And equally true, you need to know what you are doing or losses can also pile up, although l am getting pretty good at it...
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  • Profile picture of the author ryanbiddulph
    Hi Paul,

    Fear is the problem buddy. Go inside a quiet room. Relax. Allow yourself to feel whatever you fear, but, what you resist. Money problems, pro problems, all problems and struggles, feed on your deep fears that you bury and feel. Once you feel these energies - crying, etc - you release deep fears, feel better, and will attract prospering ideas. From there, acting on prospering ideas feels easier and you will be on the right track to succeed.
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by aniculaesei View Post

    Hi guys! My name is Paul and I live in Romania.
    During all my life I've tried to make something with my life, to learn something to do, to be the best...But I have failed in everything...
    I've tried to learn to be a programmer (but didn't work anything).
    I've tried to be a freelancer in work(but I've earned 20 dolars in 2 years, and now my account is suspended)
    I've tried to make some money online, but from personal reasons(religious), I don't work between Friday-Saturday...So I can't have an online business...
    I struggle every day ...what to learn to make my life better? WHAT TO learn to do something? ...But nothing works...

    Please give me advice....Thank you!
    First advise is to work between Friday to Saturday; most of us, have to work, hard for up to 10 hours per day to get anywhere online.

    And l have tried a lot of things online and overall, failed. Or spent the last 10 years at it and failed. Typically putting up to 10 hours per day on most days at it, with a few hours off every few days to prevent burnout.

    If l had just done this one day a week, it would have taken me 50 years to get to where l presently am.

    Fiverr is a good place to start if you want to try freelancing again, or not much money, but the potential to make more is there.


    And l am presently doing online trading, with promising results so far. And that only takes about 15 minutes during the day and an hour or more during the night, (NYSE, 11.30 pm, AU time).

    But that is only because l spent the last year reading several books about online trading, and also tried several different trading platforms, and learned everything l could online....
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  • Profile picture of the author socialentry
    Originally Posted by aniculaesei View Post

    I've tried to make some money online, but from personal reasons(religious), I don't work between Friday-Saturday...

    Wow what a convenient religion.
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    • Profile picture of the author GordonJ
      Originally Posted by socialentry View Post

      Wow what a convenient religion.
      For you and tagiscon, who told the OP to work on Saturday. YIKES.

      There are devout people in the world. Some very successful. The Hall of Fame pitcher, Sandy Koufax, honored his religion and sat out game 1 of the 1965 World Series.

      Although he chose to pitch on most Saturdays, he did not pitch on any of his high holy holidays.

      This is the WF, where there is NO shortage of done for you WSO type offers. And with some online marketing, he wouldn't have to work on Saturdays, or any other day he chose not to, and still be able to make a living.

      Almost all online efforts don't require a particular day of work, and in many instances, like with affiliate marketing and information selling, it can happen even while you are a digital nomad living on the beaches of the world. Several of those guys here too, I'm sure they can shed some light on the HOW TO.

      But, your prejudices aside, to the OP...

      If you will be a kind, generous person who helps others, does daily kindnesses for those around you, and if you put other people first, your life DOES mean something.

      You are having trouble with the FINANCIAL side of things. And the solution to that problem is to search your self, mind, location, knowledge, experiences, even the failures and you will find something of VALUE.

      Money is about an EXCHANGE of value. Your failure is typical of what we see here with so many Warriors, thread after thread, year after year of

      I WANT to make money, please help....blah, blah, blah. I WANT. Is the problem.

      Find something to GIVE, to exchange value with people and you'll start to see your finances improve.

      Taking one day a week off, has nothing to do with exchanging value with a given marketplace.

      GordonJ
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  • Ain't no Capital city on the planet squirtin' liquid horseshit ... but most Capital cities got fountains.

    Why in hell is that?

    Surely you can get water outta your faucet anytime?

    Ain't no reason you gotta dance naked in the Superjuicy with a whole buncha othah people jus' bcs friendly aliens landed, or Despotsassernation-4-U trashed a whole buncha evil regimes c/o Third World moms donatin' their shoes, or the signs say THIS IS 100% GUARANTEED NOT ACID .... REPEAT: NOT ACID.

    As a Princess, the entitlement of exotica mebbe forbids me from speakin' sooper trooly (though FFS I would wanna quibble on a philosophical level 'bout the meanin' of "dream curtains" if''n they hangin' up in all 607 rooms of the prison says you ain't gowin' noplace sistah till Mom & Dad find you a Prince ain't gonna trash their reputation).

    All I know is, all permutations lead to circumstance, but circumstance don't mean ZERO PERMUTATIONS.

    *Princess permits self a metaphorical tear, hopin' sumone actschwlly gonna weep. If'n this is a lottery, plz can I move Benedict Cumberbatch steada no business tycoon, cos those guys only wanna feel your boobies till either they sated, or they kill 'emselves bcs JAIL.*
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  • Originally Posted by aniculaesei View Post

    I've tried to make some money online, but from personal reasons(religious), I don't work between Friday-Saturday...So I can't have an online business...
    !
    It's entirely possible to run just about any kind of business (online or offline) and be closed on the weekends.

    In no way is this keeping you from being a success online.

    My advice? Find someone who is in a business, and ask them if they will teach you their business, while you work for them. In a year or so, you'll be able to open a business of your own, and not make most of the mistakes new business owners make.
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    • Profile picture of the author hardraysnight
      Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

      It's entirely possible to run just about any kind of business (online or offline) and be closed on the weekends.

      In no way is this keeping you from being a success online.

      My advice? Find someone who is in a business, and ask them if they will teach you their business, while you work for them. In a year or so, you'll be able to open a business of your own, and not make most of the mistakes new business owners make.
      will you teach me your business please sir
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      • Profile picture of the author Odahh
        Originally Posted by hardraysnight View Post

        will you teach me your business please sir
        You don't want to know about his business . His products suck.. that is all you need to know.

        If a customer breaks the product so it doesn't suck any more . He pays someone too fix the product so they suck again.
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  • Profile picture of the author WF- Enzo
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    I respect your views on religion but you can still try making money online even if you won't work Friday-Saturday. You can maximize the other days trying to earn money.

    If you're still willing to work as a programmer, there are many "programming for amateurs" online which goes long ways.


    Originally Posted by aniculaesei View Post

    Hi guys! My name is Paul and I live in Romania.
    During all my life I've tried to make something with my life, to learn something to do, to be the best...But I have failed in everything...
    I've tried to learn to be a programmer (but didn't work anything).
    I've tried to be a freelancer in work(but I've earned 20 dolars in 2 years, and now my account is suspended)
    I've tried to make some money online, but from personal reasons(religious), I don't work between Friday-Saturday...So I can't have an online business...
    I struggle every day ...what to learn to make my life better? WHAT TO learn to do something? ...But nothing works...

    Please give me advice....Thank you!
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  • Profile picture of the author King Manu
    I can understand your struggle.

    The problem we have in our country, and I say that from experience, is the fact we have a limited view of our possibilities. It's very common here that people are shackled by their own limiting beliefs and they perpetuate the same thing around them.

    Your problem doesn't stem from the lack of possibilities, your problem is your mind and how it thinks you can't do anything.

    Before you can achieve ANYTHING worthwhile, you need to work on your mind. Your potential is unlimited, but if you don't realize it, you will always live in this mental prison that makes you do nothing, and therefore have nothing.

    You have what is called learned helplessness, which is the same horrible psychological thing they use to train animals at Circus. Basically, you think you can't do something, so you don't even try. Not trying it gives zero results, and that makes you believe even stronger that you can't, and the circle goes on and on.

    Unless you escape your learned helplessness, there are very small chances to achieve anything. But once you do, you will start gaining momentum and make things happen for you.

    Fortunately, you have the power of choice, so escaping learned helplessness is very achievable once you decide to do it.

    After you worked on your mind and started expanding it (read some Jim Rohn, Dale Carnegie, Napoleon Hill, Zig Ziglar, and Robert Kiyosaki just to reset your mindset, because what you read is what you become), you need to find a worthwhile goal.

    Making more money is not a worthwhile goal. That's not exciting and soul-driving enough, especially if you believe in God. A worthwhile goal will be something that you can offer to the world. Something that will make a difference.

    I don't know what your passion is, that is for you to find out. Programming, writing, designing, marketing, and any other skill-trade can be seen as an important role in society.

    You help people get something they want, even if that is a software or a good product, and by helping them you get awarded.


    "You will get all you want in life, if you help enough other people get what they want." - Zig Ziglar

    For example, I help people make real the book of their dreams or drive more sales to their business.

    "We get paid for bringing value to the marketplace." - Jim Rohn


    Once you find your mission or passion, then you can start practicing that. At that point, you start learning from people that excel on that niche and do what they've done, until you will do it on your unique way.

    That's about it. Good luck, and go work hard if you want to see results!
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    • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
      Originally Posted by King Manu View Post

      I can understand your struggle.

      The problem we have in our country, and I say that from experience, is the fact we have a limited view of our possibilities. It's very common here that people are shackled by their own limiting beliefs and they perpetuate the same thing around them.

      Your problem doesn't stem from the lack of possibilities, your problem is your mind and how it thinks you can't do anything.

      Before you can achieve ANYTHING worthwhile, you need to work on your mind. Your potential is unlimited, but if you don't realize it, you will always live in this mental prison that makes you do nothing, and therefore have nothing.

      You have what is called learned helplessness, which is the same horrible psychological thing they use to train animals at Circus. Basically, you think you can't do something, so you don't even try. Not trying it gives zero results, and that makes you believe even stronger that you can't, and the circle goes on and on.

      Unless you escape your learned helplessness, there are very small chances to achieve anything. But once you do, you will start gaining momentum and make things happen for you.

      Fortunately, you have the power of choice, so escaping learned helplessness is very achievable once you decide to do it.

      After you worked on your mind and started expanding it (read some Jim Rohn, Dale Carnegie, Napoleon Hill, Zig Ziglar, and Robert Kiyosaki just to reset your mindset, because what you read is what you become), you need to find a worthwhile goal.

      Making more money is not a worthwhile goal. That's not exciting and soul-driving enough, especially if you believe in God. A worthwhile goal will be something that you can offer to the world. Something that will make a difference.

      I don't know what your passion is, that is for you to find out. Programming, writing, designing, marketing, and any other skill-trade can be seen as an important role in society.

      You help people get something they want, even if that is a software or a good product, and by helping them you get awarded.


      "You will get all you want in life, if you help enough other people get what they want." - Zig Ziglar

      For example, I help people make real the book of their dreams or drive more sales to their business.

      "We get paid for bringing value to the marketplace." - Jim Rohn


      Once you find your mission or passion, then you can start practicing that. At that point, you start learning from people that excel on that niche and do what they've done, until you will do it on your unique way.

      That's about it. Good luck, and go work hard if you want to see results!
      Wow! That is spot on.
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  • Profile picture of the author Just Jess
    What you program your mind with is the results you'll have.

    I cut ties with my former despicable self and now i gaze to a new horizon of the promise land.
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  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    Originally Posted by aniculaesei View Post

    I've tried to make some money online, but from personal reasons(religious), I don't work between Friday-Saturday...So I can't have an online business...
    Many People try to make money online however the ones that succeed keep trying.

    Sometimes that means learning something from "failure." You actually have more time than you realize. For example something I learned from John Assaraf is the value of an hour. Bascially: If you invest just one hour each day working at IM (etc.) ... You will accumlate the equivalent of 9 40-hour weeks over the course of a year. That can be some good time invested.

    And like King Manu said consider working on "The Inner Game" of success.

    HTH.

    P.S.
    On the "Religion" note, I think your Creator would love you to make the most of yourself ... Because when you do that, you can help more People. (Just my opinion.)
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  • Profile picture of the author Master Blake
    Banned
    After struggle what happens? More struggle.

    You've slithered into a loop and like most a labyrinth.

    To get out of the loop (endless continuum), get directions.

    The answers are found within and hidden in plain sight.

    In life you have to read between the lines and listen
    when opportunity pounds on your door. Just choose your
    story-line. I recommend that you implement guided imagery,
    a priceless technique that trains the mind how to think
    optimally and counter-attack the matrix.
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  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    Blake.

    Today must be an off day for me as I understand and mostly agree with what you wrote .

    People struggle and suffer not solely because of their attachments to what they desire . But but because they are attached to proving themselves worthy for what they desire .. with struggle and suffering .

    Let's say the op need only to make 1000 euros or somewhere around 1200 USD a month to have the lifestyle he wants in Romania .

    Finds a way to earn that in two days of work a month and chooses to work 4 days a month so he actually can have a far better lifestyle than he planned on at the start.

    Oh real life example the 16 year old who earned 3 million dollars winning the fortnight world cup a few weeks ago. Who doesn't get out of bed untill noontime on weekends and non school days .

    There are many people horrified and outraged .

    And there are probbaly many others telling to use 400,000 of that to go to school and get a good degree to get a good job . Making 75,000 a year working 60 hours a week
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  • Profile picture of the author Master Blake
    Banned
    There are first times for everything.
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    • Profile picture of the author Odahh
      Originally Posted by Master Blake View Post

      There are first times for everything.
      When you said guided imagary . Is that different from self hypnosis or are you using internet them interchangeably .

      As they have different meanings to me .
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      • Profile picture of the author Master Blake
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        • Profile picture of the author Odahh
          Originally Posted by Master Blake View Post




          The idea is to enjoy the process because
          that boosts vibrations which create magnetic
          fields to manifest what your heart desires.
          Or in less mystical terms . When you learn to put most of your joy and exciment into the process rather than waiting for the manifestation.

          It becomes much easier to get what you desire and you learn to desire thing that have a rwarding process.

          Rather thansuffer struggle missery and deprivation..to prove yourself worthy.
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  • Profile picture of the author palmtreelife
    Taking one day a week off, has nothing to do with exchanging value with a given marketplace.
    What you program your mind with is the results you'll have.
    These two things that Gordon and Jess said...if you hold yourself back from succeeding based on a weekly 24-48hr period of time of not being able to work (an EXCUSE), then you're right, you won't succeed.

    You have skills that you don't realize you have that you could be applying in the other 120-144 hours of the week that you have at your disposal.

    Don't make excuses. Find a way around them because there are many people who are dreaming to be in a position like yours and cannot be for other reasons.

    We all have our own unique obstacles to overcome. Anyone can learn the technical aspects of any skill. It's the other 1000 unique circumstances that make or break us.
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  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    Originally Posted by aniculaesei View Post

    Please give me advice....Thank you!
    Something else I would add is that it's important that you don't view yourself as someone who "fails" and "struggles". In the past I thought of myself as a "failure" (etc.) ... And so that's how I would intepret events in my Life.
    Decide to see yourself as someone who takes action ― like you have been doing ― and that succeeds.

    As I've said before:
    "You can learn something from everything that happens to you".

    Analyse your "failures" and learn something from them. Usually People don't succeed at IM on their first attempt: They have to keep learning and taking action. Which actually makes their success even greater. A book you may find helpful is "Psycho-Cybernetics" (By Maxwell Maltz). Essentially it's about creating a strong/successful self-image.
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    • Profile picture of the author socialentry
      Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

      As I've said before:
      "You can learn something from everything that happens to you".

      But what happens if you take a false step and fall off a 60 floor office building by accident.
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      • Profile picture of the author Odahh
        Originally Posted by socialentry View Post

        But what happens if you take a false step and fall off a 60 floor office building by accident.
        Dearh from falling off ladders and off roofs are happen more often

        Usually people who step of high buildings are either commiting suicide or more recently taking dangerous selfies .

        I usually add to that line Jon uses ..and you can learn a lot by stuff that happens to other people

        But then you are just trolling Jon. Clipping out a line from his posts and comming up with some but what if statement .

        I'll take issues with it because much of my arguing with Jon the last two years was to get him to share more of his ideas than just famouse qoutes

        And now that he starts you seem to poking at him for some reason .

        Now as for the for the guy who falls of the 60th floor I think the thing he wears is what a few second of weightlessness feels like followed by what acctually happens after death ..

        Next few lifetimes heor she might have a natural fear of hights
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        • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
          Hey Odahh. I don't think socialentry is trolling, however it's getting close to that. Thinking about it maybe a Person can't learn something from absolutely everything ... However much more than they realize ― and defintely almost anything.
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          • Profile picture of the author Odahh
            If
            Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

            Hey Odahh. I don't think socialentry is trolling, however it's getting close to that. Thinking about it maybe a Person can't learn something from absolutely everything ... However much more than they realize ― and defintely almost anything.
            One of the main things I have learned through all the problems I have gone through . Is there is how you think thing should go.. but many times that is so far from how things really go.

            The faster you learn to adapt to reality and guide thing to what you want the better .or the more prepared you are for the hundred different things or more that can happen . The better.

            The more things that go wrong that you learn to fix or prepare.

            The stuff that doesnt kill you .

            Going back to your other post there are times when it is completely fine to feel like a failure or a looser .pretty much every successful person has gone through those times that's the reality of life .

            People can cry about what should have been. Justify where they are because of what has happened in the past . Or they can deal with the reality of their life and the world we live in .and use the crap that happened in the past as reasons to make their lives better .or reasons to justify a shitty life
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            • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
              Originally Posted by Odahh View Post

              People can cry about what should have been. Justify where they are because of what has happened in the past . Or they can deal with the reality of their life and the world we live in .and use the crap that happened in the past as reasons to make their lives better . or reasons to justify a shitty life
              That's exactly how I used to be ... I just thought I had a terrible experience and that was why my Life was so "bad." However somewhere along the way I began to think differently. Like I have mentioned before: Taking responsibility is important.
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              "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
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        • Profile picture of the author socialentry
          Originally Posted by Odahh View Post

          But then you are just trolling Jon. Clipping out a line from his posts and comming up with some but what if statement .
          Now now,counter-examples should be welcomed and not condemned. Unless of course an internally consistent worldview is undesirable.
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          • Profile picture of the author Odahh
            Originally Posted by socialentry View Post

            Now now,counter-examples should be welcomed and not condemned. Unless of course an internally consistent worldview is undesirable.
            List who else besides Jon you have provide short counter examples for .in the last week .

            You can make your comments ts about Jon or a clip out of one of his posts .

            And it is fully welcomed by me if you are fine with me first explaining why it seems like a perverse jump in logic ..before I actually respond
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            • Profile picture of the author socialentry
              Originally Posted by Odahh View Post

              List who else besides Jon you have provide short counter examples for .in the last week .

              You can make your comments ts about Jon or a clip out of one of his posts .

              And it is fully welcomed by me if you are fine with me first explaining why it seems like a perverse jump in logic ..before I actually respond

              Sure be my guest.
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      • Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

        As I've said before:
        "You can learn something from everything that happens to you".
        I want to address this.

        Jonathan says "Things that are happening to you". But when you say something happened to you, you abdicate any responsibility on your part. Instead of saying "This is what happened to me" say "This is what I did".

        Your world will change.


        Originally Posted by socialentry View Post

        But what happens if you take a false step and fall off a 60 floor office building by accident.
        And..that isn't something that happens to you, it's something you did. Taking a false step is what you did, not what happened to you.

        And what would you learn? On the way down, you would learn to pay attention to where you step. If you were intelligent, you might learn where to avoid going...like the edge of the roof of a 60 story building.


        But the vast majority of the things that "happen to you" are completely in your control. And if you realize that, then learning can start.
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        • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
          Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

          I want to address this.

          Jonathan says "Things that are happening to you". But when you say something happened to you, you abdicate any responsibility on your part. Instead of saying "This is what happened to me" say "This is what I did".

          Your world will change.
          Thanks Claude : ) Interesting post: Many times I think that's true.

          However ... Sometimes it isn't. For example a Person being bullied in school isn't something they did, it's just something that happened. Of course, a Person can learn something from that. For me it made me focus on what was important (sports) and to (finally) stand up for myself,
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          • Profile picture of the author Odahh
            Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

            Thanks Claude : ) Interesting post: Many times I think that's true.

            However ... Sometimes it isn't. For example a Person being bullied in school isn't something they did, it's just something that happened. Of course, a Person can learn something from that. For me it made me focus on what was important (sports) and to (finally) stand up for myself,
            I'm sorry . I want to respond .but I don't have a good onw. I got builied in school out of school by my family .. blah blah blah . That is just stuff that happens. In the last 4 years I have run into many people who had much more terrible stuff happen .

            So I used to think all that stuff that happened to me was bad awful and miserable .

            But out of the stuff that could have happened I got off easy and was pretty much blessed .

            Hell maybe the best thing to learn when bad stuff happens ..is what you did to be involved in it happening so you don't have it happen again.

            And some bad things happen to warn you of far worse things that are happening .

            Blah for me I'm here this lifetime to achieve awakening and enlightment so that is why anything happens if the same stuff happens over and over .just meant I'm not progressing
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            • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
              Originally Posted by Odahh View Post

              But out of the stuff that could have happened I got off easy and was pretty much blessed.
              Nice. : ) Something I remember reading is that "Happiness" is being grateful for what you do have, rather than being dissatisfied for what you don't have.
              We all have wonderful blessings and it's an amazing thing.

              2C
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              "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
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              • Profile picture of the author Odahh
                Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

                Nice. : ) Something I remember reading is that "Happiness" is being grateful for what you do have, rather than being dissatisfied for what you don't have.
                We all have wonderful blessings and it's an amazing thing.

                2C
                I may feel blessed the crap I went through during my lire. Was not near as bad or not enough to break me.

                But it wasn't a blessing

                It was the universe dumpinging a steady supply of piles of crap on me until it got the point across to me there is a much better way .And the crap is not really needed
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                • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
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                  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
                    Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

                    The blessing comes from learning something from it.
                    Well I learned that most if the same crap happened over and iver and had to get real tough before I learned better way to learn.

                    I have learned far more and dar faster the last few years .without the big piles of crap falling on me on a regular basis .

                    You obviously do not believe or care about the law of attraction. Or you would understand why I'm warning against over valueing problem in the growth process.

                    Just telling the universe to put more bad times ahead of you because you learn so much from them
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                    • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
                      Originally Posted by Odahh View Post

                      You obviously do not believe or care about the law of attraction. Or you would understand why I'm warning against over valueing problem in the growth process.

                      Just telling the universe to put more bad times ahead of you because you learn so much from them
                      I'm only a "Student" of The Law Of Attraction. However as I understand it part of it is that what you focus on expands. So if a Person is focussing on learning something from everything that happens to them -- they will experience more of that learning. As it's been said: "Every problem is an opportunity."

                      I try not to "overvalue" the process of learning from adversity, failure, and heartache ... However at the same time I think it's something important.

                      What's the alternative approach? To let problems (etc.) to get the best of you? If more bad "problems" ultimately help me grow and evolve ... Then I welcome them.
                      : )
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                      • Profile picture of the author Odahh
                        Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post


                        What's the alternative approach? To let problems (etc.) to get the best of you? If more bad "problems" ultimately help me grow and evolve ... Then I welcome them.
                        : )
                        The alternative is such a slight tweak .are the problems setting the pace for how you grow and choosing what you learn.

                        are you in a state where things are happening to you . So these problems happen. To me and then I figure out why they happen and what I need to learn.

                        Or are things happening for you so you chose what you want to learn or how you want to grow . Then aim at the problems that will lead to the lessons and growth you are after .
                        .you can look at it as every problems has or is an opportunity .

                        Or every opportunity has it's set of problems . The bigger the opportunity the bigger the problems.
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                        • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
                          Originally Posted by Odahh View Post

                          Or every opportunity has it's set of problems . The bigger the opportunity the bigger the problems.
                          Well I think is depends on how you look at it. Usually an experience isn't "good" or "bad" it's how People view/interpret it.

                          P.S.
                          The bigger the "problem" the bigger the opportunity.
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                          • Profile picture of the author Odahh
                            Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

                            Well I think is depends on how you look at it. Usually an experience isn't "good" or "bad" it's how People view/interpret it.

                            P.S.
                            The bigger the "problem" the bigger the opportunity.
                            Just because it is a big problem for you doesn't always make it an opportunity for you. But it definitely is an opportunity for the person you hire to solve the problem.

                            And if you can solve all your problems without help you probably don't have big problems. Then again you will always have problems.
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          • Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

            However ... Sometimes it isn't. For example a Person being bullied in school isn't something they did, it's just something that happened.
            That's only a little true.

            An example of something beyond your control is being in a plane accident, or being born with a defect. Your height is beyond your control. Your innate intelligence is beyond your control. Who your parents are is beyond your control.

            I was also bullied in school.

            But being bullied is a reaction to stimulus. In every class there are a few that are bullied, a few that are very popular...and the rest. Why are most of the kids not being bullied?

            What makes the bullied kids a target for bullies. Do bullies bother everyone? No. Most bullies pick a victim that is either fun to bully, or the bully know a victim when he sees one.

            Here is the reason I think that being bullied is something we initiate.

            When you are being bullied by a few kids in school, and you switch schools...does the bullying stop? Usually, no. The new school students quickly assimilate you into their pecking order. If you were a popular kid, a good student, well liked at the first school, you'll soon find the same niche in the second school.

            I remember the few kids in high school that were bullied. I was one of them. They were bullied in kindergarten, elementary school, high school, and were bullied even when they moved to a new state.

            So, the conclusion is, they were contributing to the conditions that made them a victim of being bullied.

            The question should be, "How do I stop getting bullied?"

            You change your position in the pecking order. You fight back. You don't have to win. You just have to fight. And once you are no longer seen as an easy target...a safe bet...the bullies will leave you alone. Some may even become a close friend. It can happen in a few days. With me, it happened the last year in high school.

            I know that's not what we read in books on bullying. It doesn't make us feel cozy as a victim. But it's the answer.

            We can have control over almost everything that "happens to us" in our life. Most humans assume that the list of things we have no control over is far longer than it really is.

            And we always have control of our reactions...what we do...
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            • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
              Hi Claude.

              Sure many People have been bullied however the point was ... That a Person can learn something from it. (When it wasn't anything to do with them.) Many times we can't control what happens to us ... However we can always control how we respond to it. That was the point.
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

    Thanks Claude : ) Interesting post: Many times I think that's true.

    However ... Sometimes it isn't. For example a Person being bullied in school isn't something they did, it's just something that happened. Of course, a Person can learn something from that. For me it made me focus on what was important (sports) and to (finally) stand up for myself,
    Seems like a consistent pattern here, or me also. I was friends with the highest person in primary, and that was friends one week, enemy's the next, but friends overall.

    Then after that High School, or the first few years where fine, then the older girls gang started, picking on me, for reasons unknown.

    And they said l couldn't report it, or they would ramp it up.

    So l put up with trolling, bitchy women, (which where substantially bigger or taller than me) for about three years, (picking on me, throwing my school bag down the hall, etc) til l snapped, and didn't give a s***t about the consequences and went to the principal.

    Thankfully on this day they were in trouble about something else, so the principal gave them two doses of reality, or they would be thrown out if they went after me or the other thing, (smoking on school grounds l think).

    Unfortunately they started to pick on one of my best friends, and he couldn't take that and left that school, unfortunately.

    I tended to spent more and more time at lunchtime in the computer room to get away from any more of this crap.

    Then spent two years after high school, in art and design colleges, which didn't have this nonsense.

    So what did l learn, mainly not to tolerate bullying anymore!

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  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    Bullying wasn't the worst thing about school. Classroom style education is not the way I learn all that well . I had high inteligence .not genius . But still .

    So I had learning disabilities that where not diagnosed . Couldn't play sports because I was just uncoridinated . And so much of the crap that has gone on in my life . Was because I was not able to unlock and apply my intellect .

    And it has only been in the last few years the tools I need to learn best have been available.

    Knowing my learning process I can cut out much of the extra crap . That is added in tosliw learning down
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  • Profile picture of the author abunaim
    Life is full of struggle.Don't lose hope.your work will make you success one day.
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  • Profile picture of the author Nolimihero
    Bro, just never give up and keep going! The ones who work hard and smart always get what they want, just do not stop!
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