Can you motivate someone or do they have to motivate themselves? Your thoughts...

by minitg
36 replies
What's your definition of motivation and what keeps you motivated?

Can you motivate someone or do they have to motivate themselves?
#build trust #confidence #effective communication #motivate #self esteem #thoughts
  • Profile picture of the author Stevie9
    There was a famous football coach who spoke about this issue, he said that he believe that an underachieving player with no motivation could be motivated but later found out that its up to the individual, its all between the ears, sort your head out, make a plan, stick to it, become good at it, and repeat, make success.
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  • Profile picture of the author Authentic
    I believe you can motivate others. The most powerful way is through your actions. When someone sees how something is working for you, it is more inspiring than just words. The best example is kindness and love, when you share them, the receiver is motivated to be kind to someone else. Also, discipline; when you see someone strong and disciplined and the benefits they are achieving, It motivates you to get on that path.
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    • Profile picture of the author Theone24
      Some people are motivated towards what they want. Others are motivated because of what they don't want.

      For example:

      I want a Porch. (Motivated towards)

      I don't want to drive a rubbish car anymore. (Motivated from)

      As for the question, can you motivate someone?

      In my opinion you can't motivate people. You can only help them to motivate themselves.

      Example.

      If I put a gun on you, then you would be very motivated to do what I said. When if comes down to it, it's the person in danger that has the motivation. If he didn't care about his life at all, then the gun man wouldn't make any difference.

      The motivation comes from the man not wanting to get hurt. However, without the gun man, the person in danger would not motivate himself.
      Just my opinion.
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  • Profile picture of the author ryanbiddulph
    Hi minitg,

    I feel that you can inspire others to move into action, so somebody can be a source of inspiration. The motivating part is on the individual though. The fact that you can become inspired means that you are seeking inspiration on some level: again, the power is with the individual and nothing outside themselves.

    As far as my motivating factors there are many. When I have a clear "Why" in mind for my goals it becomes easier to attain them because "why" taps directly into my emotions, creating a strong motivating factor.

    Ryan
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Nguyen
    I think real motivation comes when you or the person can actually believe it will happen. But belief is not enough. You/they have to be able to see its actually possible.

    E.g you cant really motivate a skeptic if you don't show them proof that something is possible.

    Motivation works well when you know the plan/blueprint
    Motivation rarely works when its based on blind faith
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    • Profile picture of the author rvalente
      It seems to me, and many have already stated that someone who does not want to be motivated cannot be. You can't make anyone want to do something that they don't want to do. They can be forced to take some action, but no one can be forced to want or believe anything.

      However, if someone is looking for something to believe in, once they learn the truth about that thing, no one can ever take that away from them.
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  • Profile picture of the author Boomachucka
    I think it takes both.

    I know, for example, when I workout with a trainer or friend I am more motivated and generally tend to perform better. However, if I didn't want to do something (Be it fitness or otherwise), I wouldn't put in the effort either way.

    Therefore, I think that the subject must WANT the result they're working for, and the motivator may simply help them get over the mental blocks that say they can't do it.
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  • Profile picture of the author JakeRhodes
    I think you have to motivation someone to motivate themselves.

    If you don't want to do something, no amount of external motivation will change that.
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  • Profile picture of the author alexbbbh
    What keeps me motivated is the fact that I'm alive, that I'm growing each day, the fact that I have the power to do great things with my life and leave my mark upon the world, however small it may be.

    You can certainly inspire people and motivate them but it's like a recipe. The final ingredient is always the other person. They need to do their part as well.

    The worst thing you could do in life is expend your energy on people that do not want to be helped, that do not want to change. Although you started with the noblest intentions in mind, in the end you may find yourself being resented by the same person that you so willingly wanted to help.
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  • Profile picture of the author nicelife
    I believe that the "long-term" motivation is in the 8 core desires:

    • The desire to protect loved ones.
    • The desire to live... and to live a long life.
    • The desire to be free from fear, pain, and danger.
    • The desire for sex and companionship.
    • The desire to live comfortably and enjoy life.
    • The desire for approval and acceptance of others.
    • The desire for good food and drink.
    • The desire to get ahead. (Or to have more/know more/be better than others.)

    Source: The 8 Core Desires: The Root Of All Sales

    I believe these are the reasons that gives us the power to struggle and fight the battle to the end.

    In other words, true motivation can only come from within oneself.

    That's my belief anyway!

    /Daniel
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    • Profile picture of the author OLOORE
      [QUOTE][QUOTE=nicelife
      [LIST][*]The desire to protect loved ones.[*]The desire to live... and to live a long life.[*]The desire to be free from fear, pain, and danger.[*]The desire for sex and companionship.[*]The desire to live comfortably and enjoy life.[*]The desire for approval and acceptance of others.[*]The desire for good food and drink.[*]The desire to get ahead. (Or to have more/know more/be better than others.)[/LIST]Yes you are quite right.
      However, when you observe others around you enjoying the above, you can also get motivated to seek to be like them. Then the motivated comes from without
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  • Profile picture of the author silverwaterfall
    You can encourage someone but ultimately it's up to them to take action.
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  • Profile picture of the author minitg
    Interestingly in Napoleon Hill's famous book "Think and Grow Rich", he indicates in Chapter 11 that ..........

    "The men who have accumulated great fortunes and achieved outstanding recognition in literature, art, industry, architecture, and the professions, were motivated by the influence of a woman."

    So men, have you experienced the same?
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  • Profile picture of the author Gclunis
    I believe you can push them to motivate themselves.

    Think about it..if someone is constantly told that they can't do something, eventually their own mind begins to believe it and it comes to fruiting. However, the same applies when someone is constantly told that they are amazing at something or that they can do anything they want. They begin to really believe in that and they seem to be amazing at everything.

    When it comes down to it, it is all about the way their environment affects their mind set...if it is positive..then they will motivate themselves no problem...if it is negative then...they wont
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  • Profile picture of the author IRichie
    Motivation means keeping the urge of getting something alive.

    My goals motivate me. I want a good house, car and want to give my family an environment that they have never dreamt of. So these goals motivate me.

    I am really concious about getting my goals achieved and stay motivated ever.
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  • Profile picture of the author emmajane
    I believe that people who are motivated by someone's words are often looking for motivation in the first place. Secondly, what I find is common is that you may hear an inspiring speech and you think to yourself "right that's it now I'm going to do it" but then you just kind of don't. And you keep making the same resolutions over and over again. I honestly believe that when it comes to being a success, I would rather someone just give me the information to go out there and make money rather than spending time on mindset.
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  • Profile picture of the author emmajane
    moreover, there was a study done that showed that the common motivational technique often recommended of visualisation doesn't work. That people who were asked to visual themselves living their ideal life actually did less of what they were supposed to do to get it than those that didn't.
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  • Profile picture of the author thatgirlJ
    When it comes to business, I really think people have to motivate themselves. There are several friends and family members who have come to me because they want to get started writing or building affiliate websites.

    The idea is nice and they have dreams of working from home...but none of them follow through. They are not motivated enough and aren't at the place in their lives where they are truly ready to work for themselves.
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  • Profile picture of the author andrewreasoner
    I think any successful person has to be motivated. That being said, motivation from a friend or mentor can help steer that already motivated person in the right direction. You can show a horse to water, but you can't make the horse drink.
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    • Profile picture of the author Vogin
      The best motivation comes with death threats, followed by very dyre circumstances. It's just about comparing everyday situations to these...

      I don't mean the negative motivation, just the example of non-athlete beating the world record on 200 metres running from a tiger.
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  • Profile picture of the author MrPro
    Originally Posted by minitg View Post

    What's your definition of motivation and what keeps you motivated?

    Can you motivate someone or do they have to motivate themselves?
    My definition of motivation is to have a higher purpose than the one I'm currently on. I get out of bed because I want breakfast. That's motivation. I never want to take my own life because I feel I have more to offer the world and that motivates me to reach for bigger and better things (Warrior Forum Readers). Anthony Robbins says that people are attracted to pleasure and repelled by fear. Even if they are attracted to something, but they have a fear of something, the fear will out weigh the attraction. If we understand those variables in a persons mind, then it is possible to motivate someone by removing the fear and adding the attraction. A soldier is disciplined, not because he likes it but because of the fear that if it's not done there will be consequences. He is motivated by fear in the beginning and then he becomes disciplined with time. As time progresses there is a contentment in the actions that are performed and an attraction occurs. So the soldier is later motivated by a complex structure of fear that leads to pleasure. Hmmm, can we teach an old soldier new tricks, not without a lot of pleasure!!! Hoorah
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    • Profile picture of the author paulgl
      You can create artificial or outside motivators, like rewards.
      Get straight A's, I'll pay you $5 an A.

      High praise is a good motivator.

      Those work, but are not long term. You need to think of how
      can you get this person to want to do something?

      I only have experience in the education field and students.
      No matter what you are teaching, you need to somehow get
      the students to want to learn more. Then they are hooked.
      You can do this in various ways, which I won't go into here.

      But they are similar to Tom Sawyer and the fence. Perfect
      example of motivating someone who had no intention of being
      motivated to white wash a fence. Then everyone wanted in
      on the action. Yes, it's a story, but pretty spot on. Including
      having people pay HIM for the privilege of work!

      Paul
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  • Profile picture of the author Caroline Lingard
    Its up to the individual. I found this out for myself. I have been to a few seminars over the years that have had me all fired up and raring to go. When I left, hmmmm not fired up anymore. Everything in life is only every temporary including motivation so the secret to maintaining it is to find out how to do it yourself. I found out how to do this by making a list of reasons why I want to make more money and reading it every day. Works for me!
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  • Profile picture of the author Dean Jackson
    YES

    You have to motivate yourself. Nobody can make you stay motivated. Sure there are speakers that can talk you into doing things but when you leave? It up to you
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  • Profile picture of the author Roy Manley
    We are brought up hearing No you can't do that or similar thousands of times so that is why 95% of us are not motivated naturally. Motivation is an inside job. Other people can supply outside motivation which may kickstart internal motivation but unless that internal motivation starts to grow it will die out. In MLM they always insisted you stay close to the Fire to stay motivated. Creating a team around you that believes in you & your service helps. Loving what you do is a big help as is making money by doing it.
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  • Profile picture of the author Victoria Kelley
    Motivation comes from an Unquenchable thirst to be better, act better, feel better and want better. Sometimes a little push in the right direction from someone else can help, but ultimately it is up to you.

    Cheers
    Victoria
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  • Profile picture of the author minitg
    I get pumped up when I listen to motivational speakers, but then I have to keep myself motivated. It all depends on my state of mind and if I am really keen on being motivated by what I have to do.
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  • Profile picture of the author petr_ind
    Motivation is how i keep working hard.
    How to keep motivated?
    I always remember that i have to get good life for my family in the future.
    I remember my girlfriend
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    • Profile picture of the author ShowBiz
      The truth is that an occasional person has the strenght of will to inspire others and to move them to be or to act as he desires. John Wooden comes readily to mind,and Red Auerbach, Winston Churchill, and sadly, Adolph Hitler.

      And some men, like Thomas Alva Edison and Ben Franklin are so self contained and assured that they need no external inspiration.

      But most of us are dependent on emotional intertwining to achieve. I market a product that absolutely sings with motivational fervor, and those who acquire it are at the highest pitch of readiness - but they often stop dead in their tracks at the first business check. Then I try personal motivations via email, finding this easy to do due to the motivation I receive from those who try the products and succeed
      So I guess my thought is "I need you need me". No typo there. Let it resonate a bit.
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  • Profile picture of the author kbmciver
    The key to motivating someone is their innate desire to want to do it for themselves whether for pride, money or the feeling of accomplishment.
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  • Profile picture of the author stephie614
    I think motivation comes from with an individual. Someone has to be effected by what someone else is doing or saying before an individual can be motivated into doing something. If an individual is not interested in what is being said or done, they will not be motivated. Thus...motivation comes from within ourselves.
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  • Profile picture of the author jcepeda
    This is a great question.

    As far as it goes for me, motivate is internal. As someone said, between the ears. The problem isn't being able to get to a goal but having the desire to get to the goal. From personal experience, I know how to help someone lose weight because I know a little bit about this area but if the person isn't one convinced that I can do it and two that it will work, no amount of help will make the difference.

    I think Tony Robbins had the right answer, you will only motivate yourself if the pain of same is more than the pain of change. Then, you will have a reason to reach towards your goal. In other words, if you have your butt in the fire, the pain will get intense quickly enough that you will want to move away from the fire just as quickly to get to a no-pain situation.

    all the best
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  • Profile picture of the author Thomas Michal
    Motivaton to me is the desire to do something greater and not letting anything hold you back.
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  • Profile picture of the author tj0575
    Originally Posted by minitg View Post

    What's your definition of motivation and what keeps you motivated?

    Can you motivate someone or do they have to motivate themselves?
    You can definitely get the fire going for them, but then it is up to them to continue fanning the flames.

    I think of Network marketers when it comes to this. They go to the meetings and get all fired up, then they get home and the ones who are serious about succeeding continue fanning the flame, and the ones who are not let the flame die out.
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