When can you trust someone?

Trust is no necessarily something that you can establish in one meeting...but there are tell-tale signs...look at his character in the small things, ie. is he consistent with what he says and what he does? How does he relate to his friends, do they speak highly of him or are the running the other way when he walks into a room...evaluating someones character is not all that challenging when you know what to look for...its not foolproof, but it's a start...

Great Reformer Martin Luther (1483-1546) wrote: "Trust no man. Credit all men."
This is one of his most difficult quotes to truly understand. It would take pages to explain; and that would be a waste, since the understanding will come through frequent contemplation of what he meant.
Basically, you can trust no one (including yourself), because we are human.
On the other hand, you can always "credit" yourself and anyone else as being human, and therefore prone to selfishness, bad judgment, and falseness. But also assume that they are "doing the best they can with what they have"--just like I do.
Learning that balance of "crediting" others for being human just like me, rather than "trusting" them, is one of the keys to human relationships and your own Integrity.

Hi noob,

Trust your intuition. Trying to intellectualize the process of trusting is difficult because some people are tough to read. Continue - or start - to spend time in quiet. This drowns out the ego's blabbing and helps you to listen to the intuitive whispers.

Most trustworthy people make kind gestures - as you noted - and follow through on what they say. Over time you naturally will either trust this person or move in a different direction. The relationship is off to a good start from what it looks like.

Ryan Biddulph

trust your instincts.

also, after they've earned it.

To trust in someone, mmm well it can take years, days, weeks. But it depends on which do you want to trust on him.

If I were you I will start to trust gradually and see how he response, first I could trust my goals, or some experience. And then you can go even further and start to trust your thoughts or things like that.

So instead of give all the confidence, I recommend you gradually according the moment.

I agree with everyone, its in your instincts and how someone displays themselves. I would always investigate everything if you have something nagging at you about something that was said.

They have to earn it! It takes time and many difficulties to see how they really are.. But I think trusting is very important and rewarding.

I am a huge fan of pursuing as much as I can. If this guy wants to make money on the side, why not go for it unless you have other more valuable things to do. If it turns out to be phony, my guess is that you will still learn a ton in the process.


BUT take precautions along the way. Of course if money is in the picture which it probably will be, take extra precautions. Always look for ways to mitigate downside risk. Without knowing what you plan on doing I cant give more spceific advice unfortunately.


As for trusting somebody...I personally only start trusting once I know somebodys intentions. This takes time, this takes observation, and this is an art.




At the end of the day, I think my point is this. I personally have pursued many ventures in my admittedly short (relative to others here, no offense :p) life thus far and I have been burned many times. But not only did I learn from these burns, but it got me in the habit of recognizing opportunities and learning how to explore and take action on the opposrtunities. So if I was too cautious I probably wouldnt have gotten burned as much as I have, but I also wouldnt have found the incredible opportunities that I am blessed to have found.

I run my business on forward momentum, so if you are stagnant in your life/business, just go for the opportunity and see what comes of it.

My 2 cents at least


~ken

I think everyone is correct. Trust is earned. I believe your instincts about a person are usually right. Have you ever been around some people and it makes you feel creepy? or does it make you feel wonderful. Trust your instincts they usually don't lie.

they ahve to earn it for you to trust them.and instincts too

In short you don't know if you can trust him,but if everyone thought like that then we'd all be pretty lonely.It sounds like he's a good guy if he's gone out of his way to get to know you then you should give him the benefit of the doubt.

evaluating someones character is not all that challenging when you know what to look for...its not foolproof, but it's a start...

I don't trust anybody, but I believe everybody until I realize they lie. I give people a chance, doesn't mean I let my guard down, not at all.
It just means, if there is an opportunity, I will take it, but I won't walk without my borders up.
I've had friends scammed by their own friends, so you really can't trust anybody.