Do You Want To Be Successful? Do This and You Can Be

by Vincelog

Posted: 15 years ago 21 replies

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

Be Proactive

Had you ever said these sentences before?

1. My teacher stinks, that is why my results are failing.

2. My parents always made me mad.

3. My boss is a miser, he is paying me too little.

Have you notice the similarity of the above examples? They are said in a reactive point of view. Everything that is happening to them is not their mistake and they are blaming everybody for it instead.

If you ever want to be successful in life, you must be proactive and take responsibility of your own life. Nobody care about how you fare in life and you must take your own life into your own hand and this is the only way you can be successful.

"Whether I fail or succeed shall be no man's doing but my own. I am the force"
Elaine Maxwell

The Choice Is Yours

Everyday we have hundreds or thousands of opportunity to choose to be reactive or be proactive. People cutting your queue, weather is bad for your soccer game or your sister borrowed your blouse without asking for your permission. There are so many scenarios which you can just react to them which most people do.

Is it really necessary to react to it? Not really. We have the choice to choose. Reactive people will react to every single events and waste their energy on it. They made the choices without any effort put into thinking.

Proactive people think before they act. They are clear and concise about what they want and they are always in control.

Benefits Of Being Proactive

Some benefits of being proactive...

1.Responsible
2.Not easily offended
3.Think before they act
4.In control of themselves
5.Focus on things that they can control

Proactive people only worry about things they can control and this is a very important trait to have in order to be successful. They don't worry about who will win the Premier League or the NBA finals. No matter who won, their life goes on and it is not in their circle of control.

They control things such as their work attitude, their mindset and habits. These are the things they spend most of their effort on and also reap the highest benefits.

Example: Oprah Winfrey had a really bad childhood but she does not focus on the negative side of her story. Instead she focus on inspiring others with her stories.

How To Be Proactive

Take Responsibility for Your Own Life

For now, decide that you will take the responsibility for your own life. Believe that everything that happen to you is because of your own action and stop blaming others.

Can Do Attitude

Having a can do attitude will help you to take the initiative to make things happen. This mean taking actions and the ability to take action will help you to accomplish more things in life.

Go for your dream job, find your dream date and just take action to accomplish whatever you want to achieve. Let no self doubt hold you back.

Control Your Emotions

Whenever people cut in front of your car in the high way, do you have the power to resist cursing and swearing back at them? Designate a pause button to help you control your emotion to resist. Whenever someone offend you and you have the urge to react, push your pause button and make the smarter decision.

Vincent
Personal Development Blogger

**P.S**Are you in control of your life? Do you react to almost everything that is not important?

#beliefs #personal development #proactive #self improvement #success #successful

AnnaEmilie 15 years ago

thanks vincent, it is a very useful piece of information.

Thanks for sharing
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- 1 reply
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- dsanchez 15 years ago
  
  I absolutely love your post and I'll get a print-out of it.
  
  Thanks again!
  
  Dagmar
  
  Thanks
  
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pixelcrafter 15 years ago

Wow ... it's a great post .. thank you for sharing
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- Vincelog 15 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by AnnaEmilie
  
  thanks vincent, it is a very useful piece of information.
  
  Thanks for sharing
  
  Originally Posted by dsanchez
  
  I absolutely love your post and I'll get a print-out of it.
  
  Thanks again!
  
  Dagmar
  
  Originally Posted by pixelcrafter
  
  Wow ... it's a great post .. thank you for sharing
  
  Thanks for the support. I will be coming up with some more articles in next week.
  
  Cheers
  Vincent
  Personal Development Blogger
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[296306].message }}
  
  Midnight_Eden 15 years ago
  
  Thats a brilliant post. One for pinning next to my desk.
  
  Thank you
  
  Thanks
  
  Signature
  
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Clyde Dennis 15 years ago

Nice post.

Along the same lines, I read somewhere a very long time ago that one of the things all great leaders have in common is that they never, ever make excuses.

That's what this post makes me think about. Taking full responsibility for one's own life. Personal leadership.

Again, nice post.
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AndyCamden 15 years ago

Money post bro! These are the kind of inner game posts I like to read. I always have!
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jazzyjeff

15 years ago

Vincent,

Excellent post. I used to be a reacter. Now, I realize that I am better when I learn from my mistakes.

Can do attitude hits home for me. I keep thinking about things I want to do and that no one can stop me from accomplishing it. I always say to myself "I am going to..." Believe it or not, some of it has come true already without me realizing it.

Jeff

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1 reply

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Vincelog

15 years ago

Originally Posted by Clyde Dennis

Nice post.

Along the same lines, I read somewhere a very long time ago that one of the things all great leaders have in common is that they never, ever make excuses.

That's what this post makes me think about. Taking full responsibility for one's own life. Personal leadership.

Again, nice post.

Hi Dennis,

Great leaders never make excuses nor blame others for their failures. They took everything in their own hand and with the strong belief that they are responsible for their own life. That is why they are the great leaders.

Originally Posted by AndyCamden

Money post bro! These are the kind of inner game posts I like to read. I always have!

Thanks Andy, I will posting in a weekly basis in this forum. Do check up my blog if you would like to read more articles like this. http://healthmoneysuccess.com

Originally Posted by Mari_Quint

Being proactive reduces worrying and stress. Taking control of our actions is a much better position than constantly reacting and yes, whining about the things around us.

Thanks for a great post. Very Inspiring.

Hi Mari Quint,

Being proactive really remove most of the worries and stress that are caused by things that we can't control. Taking control will definitely put us in a more favorable position to handle the uncertainties in this modern world.

Originally Posted by jazzyjeff

Hey Jeff,

Congrats for the things that had already came true for you. This is the benefit of having the can do attitude that will help us achieve results.

@Hi Warriors,

Thanks for the support and replies. It will be great if you guys have any comment or feedback about my articles, so that I can improve it for you.

Cheers
Vincent
Personal Development Blogger

Thanks

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Barry Rice

15 years ago

Originally Posted by Vincelog

Be Proactive

The Choice Is Yours

Everyday we have hundreds or thousands of opportunity to choose to be reactive or be proactive. People cutting your queue, weather is bad for your soccer game or your sister borrowed your blouse without asking for your permission. There are so many scenarios which you can just react to them which most people do.

Is it really necessary to react to it? Not really. We have the choice to choose. Reactive people will react to every single events and waste their energy on it. They made the choices without any effort put into thinking.

Proactive people think before they act. They are clear and concise about what they want and they are always in control.

[

Great subject - "Choice". That's a wonderful aspect of God's daily sunrise. He gives us a horizon from which we can makes choices from the opportunities presented. We can choose our attitudes, our reactions to others, the many opportunities for our personal lives, choices for our careers, our family life, our finances, et al.

If I may, I wrote an article about choices and the importance of accepting that making choices will determine our success or failure in our daily lives and future.

A Choice Is A Choice Is A Choice

Not making a choice is a choice. Letting things just happen in your life is a choice. Not putting your definition of success into writing is a choice. Accepting less than what you deserve, based upon your effort, OR, lack of effort is your choice.

Not liking a particular choice does not mean that you do not have a choice. We are all constantly presented with choices - every day, we make hundreds of them. You can choose to be someone who makes life happen, OR, you can choose to continue in the addictive behavior of taking life simply as it happens - to 'wing-it'. To me that's no choice - BUT, it IS your choice!

It personally took years for me to understand that when I don't make a choice and simply let things happen, or let others make choices for me, I have given up any personal power I may have had toward advancing the enjoyment of my definition of success.

At times, it can be freeing to give others the opportunity to choose for us. After all, if they make the choice for you, it is their responsibility - Right?

WRONG! Giving up the right to choose does not mean you give up responsibility. You are still responsible, even if you choose to not to choose.

At times, the only choice you may have is to choose your attitude and how you will respond to the happenings around you. These choices are powerful because they allow you the power to stay in control of your internal thoughts even if you cannot control the external circumstances. Making choices must be a conscious response.

Making choices, and being mindful of your choices, is important because it helps you remember that you are the only one responsible for the outcome of your actions. By taking responsibility for making your own choices, with a positive attitude in tow, you remove yourself from the role of victim. Being a victim of someone else's choices for you is a weak position to be in and removes choices you may otherwise have made.

Make a choice - even a poor choice is better than no choice at all!

Now, make the choice to go grab yourself a whole bunch of sunrises of opportunity!

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GoldenRule 15 years ago

Vincent,

Great post! It seems so simple yet is so powerful. It seems like we sometimes forget the very simple, basic things that make such a huge difference. The comment about the pause button reminds me of something my Dad always told me when I was young. He said that whenever I felt myself start getting mad, I should count to 10. I know realize it was meant to help me to stop for a moment to think, i.e. press the pause button.

Ken
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vanessad

15 years ago

What a great thread.

So many times people say "I have to...." I find that there are always at least two choices in any situation, it just may be that we don't like the foreseeable outcome of either choice. People will say, you don't have a choice about paying taxes. Of course, you do. You can choose not to pay your taxes and go to jail.

Okay, so you don't have a choice about what someone else chooses to do, but you do have a choice in how you respond. Someone mugs you in the park, not your choice. Let them have your wallet and jewelry or fight back, your choice.

I really love the book, The Success Principles, co-authored by Jack Canfield. The number 1, very first principle is "100% Responsibility" in your life.

Take responsibility and live with passion and purpose!

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Vincelog

15 years ago

Hi Barry,

Not making a choice is still your choice, this is a great point. Thanks Barry.

Originally Posted by GoldenRule

Vincent,

Great post! It seems so simple yet is so powerful. It seems like we sometimes forget the very simple, basic things that make such a huge difference. The comment about the pause button reminds me of something my Dad always told me when I was young. He said that whenever I felt myself start getting mad, I should count to 10. I know realize it was meant to help me to stop for a moment to think, i.e. press the pause button.

Ken

Hi Ken,

"Dad always told me when I was young. He said that whenever I felt myself start getting mad," This reminded me of an article I wrote. Maybe you would like to check that out. 10 Anger Management Tips + 1 From Google | Hit Your Goals

Originally Posted by vanessad

Hi vanessad,

When people mentioned,"I have to..." they strip themselves off of power and it is a choice they made. As what Barry mentioned, we make choices everyday, even when we are not making choices, it is a choice too. We always have the choice to do other wise.

I had not read "The Success Principle" yet, I believe I am going to pick it up soon.

Cheers
Vincent
Personal Development Blogger

Thanks

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DirectoryKing 15 years ago

Great post, we can all learn a lot from. Self doubt is bound to appear but it is how you face it that really matters.
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mikeyg 15 years ago

Good post Vince - it can be taken back even further to a deeper understanding.

It is a hard pill to swallow but a majority of people do not understand that they are always successful in everything that they do. There is no such thing as failure. That is an excuse that mankind has created to say, "I can't because, or If only---".

Human beings have been created to do one thing each and every moment - produce a result. By what they are thinking or not thinking, which influences what they say or don't say, which influences what they do or do not do - they are producing a result and that result is always a success for them.

We as outsiders witnessing that result (success) have been tought to judge it or label it as being good or bad, right or wrong according to our own perceptions and beliefs, but it is just what it is - a result. All the pain a person experiences in his/her life is because of a judgement they are making in the moment about something they are witnessing. If they would accept and allow the result to be what it is without the judgement they would not experience any pain.

The problem lies in the fact that most people do not measure their results to see if it taking them towards their objective or moving them further away. The beauty of the result is that if you stop and look at it and acknowledge it, without judging it, it will show you what you are doing with respect to your thoughts, words, and actions. You can then make a choice - do you wish to continue doing what you are doing to produce the same result (re-acting) - or do you wish to make another choice to produce a different result.(pro-active)

This is where the responsibility comes in. However, in our society most people have been taught to disempower themselves. They won't take the responsibility for creating the result they are experiencing (most of them are unaware of how they even created the result) and instead will point a finger at you and say it is your fault.

Most people are also circumstance dependent. They place all of their emotions on a result happening in a specific time in a certain way. And because they do not understand how they are creating the results they are experiencing, (they want one result but their thoughts, words, and actions are moving them in the opposite direction) and the fact, that they are always successful in everything they do, when they do create the result they experience (which is opposite of what they said they wanted), instead of looking at it and saying, WOW what was I doing to create you, they judge it and create the pain and emotion which then keeps them focused upon and trapped in that situation.
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btouringkr

15 years ago

Very positive article.

Originally Posted by Vincelog

Designate a pause button to help you control your emotion to resist. Whenever someone offend you and you have the urge to react, push your pause button and make the smarter decision.

It is important to not let your emotions control you, but how do you exactly use a "pause" button? Won't it have ill effects if you try to suppress what you are feeling?

Thanks
1 reply

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Vincelog

15 years ago

Originally Posted by btouringkr

Very positive article.

It is important to not let your emotions control you, but how do you exactly use a "pause" button? Won't it have ill effects if you try to suppress what you are feeling?

Hi btouringkr,

Pressing the pause button does not mean you are suppressing your feelings. It is bringing yourself to a level where you can think clearly and act clearly. Most of us act by having a immediate reaction to our emotions, this means that we are acting by instinct instead of making logical choices that may prove much more beneficial to us.

Cheers
Vincent
Personal Development Blogger

Thanks

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bigmoney4me 15 years ago

Thank you SO much! This is VERY inspiring!

I now see which side of the fence I want to be on, as readings this has shown me I'm currently in the middle.

This has answered many questions for me and given me something solid to focus on and work towards becoming.

Thank you for infinity!
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Styleearn.com 15 years ago

Thanks for sharing , such a nice piece of quote.
Iam gonna make it hard copy and frame it to my room wall , will surely reminds me whenever i will do mistake or simply prohibits me to make a mistake.
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Warrior Globetrotter

15 years ago

Yes, taking responsibility is important...thanks for the post

Thanks
1 reply

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Vincelog

15 years ago

Originally Posted by Warrior Globetrotter

Yes, taking responsibility is important...thanks for the post

You are welcome.

Originally Posted by mommy4

I love this post, you hit it right on the head.

Thanks for reading.

Originally Posted by Styleearn.com

Thanks for sharing , such a nice piece of quote.
Iam gonna make it hard copy and frame it to my room wall , will surely reminds me whenever i will do mistake or simply prohibits me to make a mistake.

That will be great. Constant reminders are sometimes needed.

Originally Posted by bigmoney4me

Thank you SO much! This is VERY inspiring!

I now see which side of the fence I want to be on, as readings this has shown me I'm currently in the middle.

This has answered many questions for me and given me something solid to focus on and work towards becoming.

Thank you for infinity!

It is great to see that this article had provided value for you. Good luck to you wish you great success.

To your success,
Vincent
Personal Development Blogger

Thanks

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