When visualizing fails big time, what do you do?

The only comforting thing I can say is that I totally empathize and sympathize with you. I am also trying to really understand the true meaning of Law of Attraction and it is more complex than just thinking positively and visualizing. I know that if there is a trace of fear and doubt it can increase the risk of things going sour. But when you are faced with disappointment after disappointment, it is hard to want to keep going and very hard to get that fear and doubt out of your mind. I have also been faced with that kind of thing many times but you are right, if you give up you will regret it later on. Some of the most successful people out there failed miserably at first but kept trying and eventually they succeeded. I know this may not be helpful but I do believe that things happen for a reason, usually anyway. Perhaps these people were placed in your life in this situation in order to help you in a sense find a way to deal with negativity from others while you keep your head up high? Eventually when you are connected with those who are going to help you out, when you get that kind of negativity from others, you will be able to not let it bother you as much and won't let it get into the way of your work. But either way, that is painful and I would be very upset in that case too. I wrote one book and very few were interested in it, but I still wrote another book which will not be officially launched until late spring. But I admit I am also terrified of the same thing happening, especially since I put much more effort and time into it. But... there it is, doubt and fear are getting into the way. It takes practice and requires a lot of effort to not let that get to you.

Hey Bambii,

First congrats on taking the action regardless and doing your visualizations.

I would dive into what exactly you're doing with your visualizations ... both during, and after.

Visualization is very important, but as with anything, you have to be very conscious about how you're doing it.

Let's take affirmations and goals for example, because that's the place visualization comes from ...

I often find people are claiming affirmations and creating goals that are to do with a specific person or persons.

Standing alone, this is not good.

It can be good if the goal is completely detached and they're willing to put on there the caveat, "this or something better."

What we have to remember is that any goal we choose, of which we then create affirmations and visualization techniques for, it must be possible for them to be completely initiated and maintained by us.

Meaning, it can't be dependent on other specific people.

Sure, have the intention of the specific type of 'energies' you want to have, as in people and what they're like. But careful about specific people, as that can't be initiated and maintained by you.

So, this may or may not fit what you're discussing ... as I had to just conclude with an idea of what you're referring to with your visualization. See though if that fits in anyway and you can get any value from it.

What it comes down to is A. the quality of the visualization. B. the quality of the feeling you're experiencing during the visualization (ie. gratitude for it already having been manifested in your life), and C. the quality of action you're taking after the visualization.

Hope that helps :-)

With Love & Gratitude,
--Sean Patrick Simpson
www.AdventuresInManifesting.org

Hey Bambii,
Visualization is great, we need to know where we headed. The problem is that we say we let it go, but often do not. I have found that when I choose to do something, and I focus only on that step, I lose my attachment to the result. When we lose our attachment to where a particular action "should" lead we allow ourselves to enjoy the journey and where we end up is often better than we could have planned. As an example if you are asked out on a date and you go into it with the attitude of this is "the" person for me I just know it, we have set the bar way to high and we often end up disappointed and end up with self talk of "I'm no good", "I'll never find anyone". The opposite is we decide to go out for the evening and get to know a new friend, the end result is you have a nice evening and perhaps plan on a second date with no pressure, at that point the self-talk is more encouraging, "I'm a good person", "I deserve a good relationship" etc. What I'm saying is enjoy the action for the actions sake nothing more, nothing less and you will be amazed at the change in your attitude and the results.
Mike

Bambii,
Congratulations on sticking with - keep going......
I would work on your self-confidence, which seems to have taken a hit along the way. Create small goals that you know can accomplish. Visualize the smaller goals. Then celebrate each as you accomplish them.
Visualization is combined with self-belief - you have to believe without a doubt that you can accomplish the goal - so start with baby steps and work your way up after several accomplishments.
Life isn't easy, and certainly being an entrepreneur is not easy, that is why most people don't have the courage to even start. You did! Don't forget your passion, determination, perseverance, and your motivation. You can do this - you have already made it much farther than most of the population!

I think you should read "The Science of Getting Rich" by Wallace D. Wattles. Basically, just spend time every day imagining that you are already where you want to be, be grateful that everything is in the process of happening to get you what you want, and remember that the current state of things is just part of that process. Also, be efficient and as effective as you can be with what you have, and always give back more than you receive, and you'll know that you are always being a positive force in the world. If you do this, according to Wattle, you can't fail to get rich, and get to the situation that you hold in your mind.

I make this mistake! While trying to visualize and focus on the end result, I get caught up in the steps and contingencies that I think will get me there. Gotta let that stuff gooo! Thanks for your help Gekko!

Thanks Errol, you're totally right. I know things will improve for me, and I am grateful for that, and I'm glad I'll have experiences that shape my appreciation for the good, uplifting stuff.

If a mild wind could blow a house down, it wasn't meant to stand, right? And that's that. Onward and upward.

Focus on your actions and analyze the results of those actions so you hone them to be the most impactful on your vision. When you are are taking the right actions the vision will be closer. Good luck.

Hi there,

A couple of items (I haven't read the whole thread, so others may have addressed this, but I was just addressing you and your question).

1) Visualisation:
I am a massive fan of The Secret and the Law of Attraction, in that feeling what is possible, visualising that vividly and feeling what it will feel like once you get it, is a real force.

I am in 2 minds as to whether it is simply the subconscious getting in touch with the feeling of the new thing you are getting, and being alert to the opportunities, and subtly pushing you in the right direction, or whether there is some quantum thing creating thing - I simply don't care - it works, its a method.

BUT I have found for every amount that visualisation is effective, mapping out an action plan to get you there, and then measuring how far or close I am getting to where I want to be, is much much more effective again.

Also I like to throw massive action at items sometimes - eg just do all the things that I can think that will get you there.

2) The language patterns of your question made me think about where you are coming from. eg How are you defining "fails big time".

If the goal was to meet new people, then you have succeeded.
I am of the opinion that people on the whole are good people, but there are some assholes in the world as well.

If you find an asshole, then awesome you have learnt that this person was a knob, and that you dont want to be their friend.

Who cares what an asshole thinks - they are are an asshole, so good luck with their life.. on to someone else who is actually a decent person..

Doesnt mean you change your approach to putting yourself out there..

Anyway, good luck, I can tell from your writing that you are a nice person, so don't frett about it and keep being awesome..

Cheers,
ADSLgeek

There are very few successful people who have not, or are not experiencing failures. I think it's vital to pay attention to your explanatory styles. Successful people do not think of failures as final, they see it as educative and as stepping stones. They know it comes with the territory.

Visualization is just a part of the process. Are you leveraging the right business models? Do you have a mentor? Are you focused on the positives? Are you exploring domains that you're really passionate about?

The reality is there's so much to learn from failures. Learn the lessons and move on.

I wish you the best.

I would love to help you out with this because I have discovered two specific trends on either side of the "mind power" equation. These trends are radically opposite in both application AND the results produced. First I'll start with trend one, which is growing at insane rates right along with the poverty level:

Trend #1 is the theory that has been "passed off" as a law which leads a person to believe that our though process alone can change out life's situations and future outcomes. Also called the law of attraction, asking the universe, seeing something and then receiving it, and so on.

This trend is not healthy for society, it is not healthy for those who live according to it, and it is not going to help make anyone's life better. The reason why is obvious but no one wants to admit it because obviously it goes against what's rising as the "norm" of society when talking about HOW a person becomes successful.

If you believe that feeling good about doing something will make you better, you may end up tricking your conscious or unconscious mind, but will you really become better at that skill? Not really. If you try to see yourself dealing with a client in a positive way or closing a huge deal to make a sale you are limited by what YOUR conscious mind can provide as imagery. When you get thrown into the real scenario however, the scene plays out totally different. What do you do then, rely on being positive still or rely on skills that you should have been developing with ACTION rather than THINKING.

The problem with this trend is that it has created a huge confusion in what people should really be focusing on when trying to better their life and the surrounding circumstances. It gives a person thought to believe that really it wasn't the fault of their actions that brought about their life but rather their thoughts. The argument is somewhat substantial, and yes your thoughts being positive IS an important part of the process, but the way these educators try to make it seem (mostly for marketing purposes because we all look for the QUICKEST and EASIEST way to get something done) is that you simply have to see the brighter side and then you will magically get blessed.

They tell you to put your faith in the Universe. That's like putting your faith in the dirt. The Universe is something we coexist with and has no power. Honestly, if you want to put your faith in something unseen, put it in the Creator of the Universe.. doesn't that seem to have more power? That's what I do, and it has paid off for me greatly.

Now here is trend two... the ones who succeed at everything they do fall in this trend. Now normally they start out falling into the first trend as that is where nearly EVERYONE starts off. No one finds the true keys to creating a meaningful existence right away, otherwise the world would be much different. Rather we all get caught into the same process and are all required to persevere through to the end. Key word being PERSEVERE. That's the first thing that separates the people from trend two from the people in trend one.

I'm not just talking about persevering merely until finding success. There are a few things you've got to tackle if you fall under trend one before you can expect to create any desire you're trying to have in your life. The first is to persevere to the truth. You have to know what is real and what is phony. You want to be able to discern what is right from what is wrong, both morally and literally. If you can tell between an up and a down, a left or a right, you can pick and choose paths that will lead you towards final success.

That sounds easy, right? They make it sound easy at least, by saying just to choose according to your instinct... but if your instinct has been lied to, then how can you know whether or not to trust it? Exactly my point behind having to PERSEVERE. Our instincts never want to lie to us on purpose, they're tricked by the marketing bull we are subject to on a daily basis. If everything we heard were true about all that we are subjected to earth would be the ultimate utopia, but its not so YOU'VE got to be the one that can determine these things. Your instinct will learn to follow in line as soon as you begin to question the little unnoticed things you once thought were normal but really are holding you back.

Here is a good example: television. How much tv do you watch on average? Maybe you particularly don't watch much tv, but there is more than likely some things you do that produce not a single positive result for what you really want out of your life. When you begin to question yourself in this way after deciding that you want to persevere through whatever it takes to know the truth, you will find yourself making changes in your life.

But, decision isn't enough though... it takes commitment. Committing is not much different than deciding... the only extra element to a commitment is inspiration. When you commit to something there is usually an underlying reason WHY. Do you know WHY you want to be successful? I mean, it really isn't for the money or the house... those are all superficial when it comes down to it. Money is a tool, a house is just a place to live made out of the materials of the earth. One day they will all pass away. There is always a deeper WHY to what you want to know. Your soul is what searches that out each and every day. That's why we are naturally beings that live by faith.

That's another huge difference between people who fall in trend one and the others in trend two. Don't put your faith in your visualizations, because then you are really putting your faith in your own hands. That basically is like adding responsibility to your workload, which results in pressure and stress. If you want to visualize, put your faith where all human faith should ultimately go, in the hands of the one who directs our lives. With that kind of faith you gain inspiration to put with your decision. That will give you a commitment to persevere through anything. You will feel no stress or pressure because what once felt like a responsibility or obligation will become a mission. It will be something you DESIRE to fulfill because you've realized your life is not just a series of completed goals but that you ultimately have a DESTINY.

The only thing standing between you and your destiny is the straight line path to get there. Yes, things will come to stand in your way, but they don't have to be from within you. Rather find what is inside of you and use that as strength. But, you've got to cultivate that strength inside first, and visualizing will not make you strong. I suggest you search inside of your soul and see where your faith is so that you can have that why figured out and know your inspiration. THEN you will be able to commit yourself to true perseverance and you will get things done no matter WHAT comes in your way.

Hope that helps anyone that reads!

God bless,
Chris Kahler

Thanks to all who posted this has been a great read. The Law of Attraction is something that on the surface would seem simple, but the more you understand or you think about it there is so much little stuff 'or mental cobwebs' if you like that get in the way.

One of the keys in visualization is focusing on the feeling of having something... not of wanting something. Combine it with the intense feeling of gratitude then you're good to go.

Bambii, try this:

Instead of visualizing how you'd like it to be, can you remember a time when things happened the way you wanted? Have you ever gotten a client who treated you well and made you feel good? Or have you ever received a compliment?

Why does this work?

Because, you don't have to re-invent the wheel in your imagination. Your memory will work too. You're already using your memory of your recent hurt. So you know you're good at doing that. Just do the same process, but use positive memories.