I'm worried about my friend...

11 replies
I have a friend who is an excellent auto-mechanic, and lately he's been talking about starting up his own company: an auto-repair shop called Frankenstein Engineering.

Now I think he's a great guy, but I fear for him and his financial future because he's a huge cynic, seems to have a lot of trouble getting along with people (he's 37 and still hasn't managed to form a stable and lasting relationship with a woman, though he dates quite often), and has even told me that he thinks The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is a terrible book that teaches bullcrap principles (his words, not mine).

I like the guy, and he's a good friend, but I can't help but be a little concerned that his attitude will eventually lead him to financial ruin, especially if he actually tries to start his auto-repair company with his current mindset. But even if he does manage to avoid financial ruin, I fear that his mindset may at the very least keep him stuck in a state of perpetual limbo where true and lasting success is always out of reach.

Does anyone have have any advice I could give my friend? I'd like to help him out, but I just don't know what to say. =/
#friend #worried
  • Profile picture of the author zannix
    If he thinks the books teaches 'bullcrap principles', then he either doesn't understand the principles and is therefore irritated by the fact, or he simply isn't ready for the book yet...

    When he is ready, he will reach for the book himself... and that's when he will learn the most.

    Kind Regards,
    Zannix
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  • Profile picture of the author P.Sharma
    Wow, BullCrap :p I think that its a great book but a book can also help you only if you are open to it. I mean everytime I read Think and Grow Rich I learn something new so I've realised that eventhough there is a ton of knowledge out there, you do not make any sense out of it unless YOU ARE READY FOR IT
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  • Profile picture of the author paidtoclickmoney
    You will either have to make him have second thoughts about this business or have a long long conversation about his mindset and how it won't work in this case. Sometimes you just have to be a bit cruel... just tell him the real thing.
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  • Profile picture of the author ephame
    As paidtoclickmoney said i think stand him up and give him a reality check, as the business owner he would need to have some people skills at some point in the business if nothing less than to deal with his customers. Sure he can hire people do take up these tasks but you have to ask him where he actually see's himself ending up or going with his business.
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    • Profile picture of the author lovelysue
      Go with him to a networking meeting so that he "gets it" when it comes to problems businesses have, what attitudes are acceptable and what are not when it comes to running a business.

      Introduce him to a coach. Buy him a flower and tell him that if he can manage to take care of the flower - he can manage to take care of a business.

      Does that help?
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      • Profile picture of the author Tainted Seraphim
        Originally Posted by lovelysue View Post

        Buy him a flower and tell him that if he can manage to take care of the flower - he can manage to take care of a business.
        I dunno, it might look kinda weird for me to go buying flowers for another guy. He might get the wrong idea. :S
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  • Profile picture of the author kellyburdes
    There is really not much you can do.

    People do not change until the pain of not changing is greater (in their own perception) than the pain of change is.

    Not much you can do about that.
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    • Profile picture of the author successtricks
      You can only take an horse to the stream but you can not force it to drink water. You can only open his eyes to the advantages and disadvantages but be careful the way you do this, so that you dont loose your friendship.

      You can not change people but people only change themselves.
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  • Profile picture of the author ccora
    It's extremely touchy to try and offer help to someone with a problem when they don't think they have a problem. It could backfire in your face. Perhaps the only thing you can do is maybe give him some resources that have something to do with small business, customer service and sales. Hopefully, he can learn something indirectly.
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  • Profile picture of the author lovelysue
    it might look kinda weird for me to go buying flowers for another guy. He might get the wrong idea. :S
    No problem. Just make the suggestion that he needs to buy something alive that he needs to take care of (like a house plant, or a dog or a cat) to prove that he has what it takes to nurture a business from zero to zillions.

    Everyone can say they want a business. But it takes patience to run it and passion (lots of it). There's a quote:

    If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea. Antoine de Saint-Exupery
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  • Profile picture of the author stopper
    i hope you are not trying to shield him from reality like a child
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