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Anyone else deal with this?

by josh123
30 replies
Okay, so I know this is nothing new for entrepreneurs, but it's still an issue for me-how do you deal with the loneliness of working from home? It's not that I have any real close friends at work. But I have plenty of people that I'm around and talk to daily.

When I'm home (I'm a freelance writer) I work in my room by myself all day. My job really doesn't require any phone conversations or face-to-face meetings, so it can get real lonely.

Anybody else in the same boat? If so, how do you deal with it? Thanks a lot!
#deal
  • Profile picture of the author zannix
    Music my friend, music.

    Also, learn to enjoy your own company. You'll be stuck with it for life.
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  • Profile picture of the author Darla Christensen
    Banned
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  • Profile picture of the author Jason Z
    Hey Josh,
    What I like to do is a couple days a week take my laptop to a place with Wifi where I can sit and drink coffee and be in a place with other people. Even though you really arent talking to anyone and are just working, it's nice to break up the solitude every once and a while.
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  • Profile picture of the author mgreener
    Hi,

    It will never be easy, but you can change your perception of it. Think about and use your liberty to go out with friends in a non professional setting. Go on dates on weeknights, during the day and in general split up your "workdays" so that you're living life and doing what you enjoy.
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  • Profile picture of the author Grahamc
    Josh, this is a really interesting question and illustrates how different we all are. I really look forward to my time alone and I've been like that since I was a kid many years ago. I'm not saying I don't need social interaction, because I do enjoy the company of others, but there's something about being alone that comforts me. It seems the opposite is true for you.
    However, being alone is very different to being lonely. A few years ago I found myself living on my own and it was very hard at times. The suggestion of music is one that works for me, does it work for you? What about the radio? Maybe if you examine what you get from the company of others you might find a way to satisfy this need in another way.
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  • Profile picture of the author Daymon
    I suggest keep reading motivational material and keep your focus on the big picture, UR Goals!
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  • Profile picture of the author TopKat22
    I never get lonely. I have a lot of friends and business associates and a large family so when I get to a point where I need to take a break, I respond to friends on facebook and twitter. Msg and text other friends and might call one or two people.

    Plus, I have my puppy who is always company.

    I also spent many years, years ago learning to be still and quiet and alone without feeling lonely so I think that helps.

    I actually am never lonely even though most of the time, I am by myself. :-)
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  • Profile picture of the author caseycase
    I talk to myself.

    Seriously, though, what I do is grab my laptop and head out somewhere with some wifi, as Jason mentioned above. Actually, as I have frequented the same places, I do end up getting to know some folks and having some conversations.

    (And I actually do find myself talking to myself on a regular basis. That's when I know I need to get out of the house lol.)
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    • Profile picture of the author tenaciouscreations
      I can relate to being lonely when working from home. Even thought I am mostly a loner I think we all need some social interaction now and again. I have taken my laptop to a coffee shop that has wi-fi, or the public library. Then at least there are people around you, however that does not always alleviate the loneliness.

      So I will often take breaks through out the day and go out to somewhere where people are and make it my mission to interact with at least five different people who I don't know. I generally find if you show a genuine interest in some one they are more than happy to tell you about themselves.

      If you are really lucky you get your elevator speech in about what you do. Its a great way to get perspective when writing sales pages.

      Ben
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  • Profile picture of the author GT
    I am a home-based writer, too, but I enjoy the solitude and have never felt lonely. (I do have a spouse, however, so I guess I am not entirely alone, as she is there in the evenings and weekends ... although I still do try to retreat to my writer's cocoon as much as respectfully possible.)

    GT
    p.s. Upbeat music is a great suggestion to pick up your spirits.
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  • Profile picture of the author thewpguide
    Sometimes loneliness hits me big time. When I get this I usually pick up my phone and call a friend or text them, send someone an email or interact with people on Facebook.

    Getting out of my work space also helps. The other day I was feeling lonely as I was not in human contact with anyone for a whole day so I took a walk and smiled and said hi to everyone who walked past me. I went to the shop and had a brief conversation with the worker and I felt ready to rock and roll again.

    You just have to keep doing things that brings you back to the real world.
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  • Profile picture of the author Top Dog Marketer
    Whenever you get to that place while working at home, you need to find something to do that will make you happy. I personally go swimming at the gym when I start to "lose it."

    It's only natural man, we weren't built to stare at a screen for 8+ hours a day
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  • Profile picture of the author LorrieJean
    Josh sometimes I feel lonely around other people too. I've found being around other entrepreneurs, biz owners, marketers etc. it's is truly a blessing to be around others of like mind. Perhaps you could start a writer or blogger group in your area? I like Jason's idea of breaking up the routine too.

    Great idea's thanks all
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  • Profile picture of the author hardraysnight
    i usually have john, george ringo and paul with me so seldom lonely
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  • Profile picture of the author Justin Says
    Ha.

    I can say I'm on the same boat.

    Here are a few of my methods to keep myself both motivated and upbeat.

    1. Every few hours I go out to ride my motorcycle.

    2. Every few hours I go out to get something to eat. I don't cook inhouse much right now, because I like getting the social interaction when I go to a restaurant.

    3. I turn on music via Pandora (random music so I don't have to worry) or watch videos on my second computer screen while I work.

    4. I go out to play racquetball every night with one of my friends.

    and

    5. I twiddle my fingers. I come up with an awesome idea and I just work really hard on it and don't focus on anything else

    EDIT: I lied... #5, I jump around from idea to idea all day hahaha. but I do work hard on them.
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  • Profile picture of the author anthonywaldrop
    thanks for sharing
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  • Profile picture of the author w@rrior
    No, I don't have a problem with lonelyness at my workplace..as zannix said you have to put some music...and you have to do some breaks and take a walk or some exercises..or whatever you like to do
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  • Profile picture of the author Debra Barrow
    I also keep the television on while I'm working. When I get time to talk, I make a few calls. Basically, I'm too busy to think about being lonely.
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    • Profile picture of the author josh123
      Thanks everyone for your help and sorry for the LATE response. I actually got a job soon after posting this (hence my lack of response) but I just quit today. I realized that while I enjoy the social interaction of the workplace, it's not worth hating my job every day.

      I'm going to give the business another go. I'll just try breaking things up, and also get out more.

      I think one of my biggest problems is that I'm a real introvert and don't have much of a social life outside of work. That's probably something I'll need to work on. That, and hang around this forum more-it's a real encouragement. Anyway, thanks everyone for your help!

      Best,

      Josh
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  • Profile picture of the author john1818
    Hi,

    I can say that it's really boooooring to work all day without no conversation to anyone at all. I'm working 12-16 hours a day.
    Here's what I do in order to fight that boredom.

    1. I make sure that for everyday at least for an hour that I'll stop working and do whatever I want to do. "Playing some video games, listening to music, Meditating, Eating some snacks in a restaurant, watching videos, anything to keep me away from work.

    2. Whenever I'm working I tend to put my headphones on. I like Rock genre so ideally I'm more than awake whenever I'm working. It makes me feel alive even though I'm working alone.

    3. Also, whenever I feel sad and alone I'll just call someone and talk to them for 10 minutes over the phone.

    4. Watching funny movies, and videos will also help. I love watching "The Bigbang Theory" whenever I feel sad or bored.

    Hope this helps.

    Cheers,

    John
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  • Profile picture of the author AnneE
    I do two things. I'll often structure my day so that each day I get "out" on some level. Getting out could be driving some place to go for a run in a different neighborhood where I'll smile and nod to people out walking. Or it could be that I simply go to the grocery store. Or if I need to catch up with a friend, maybe that will be my "outing" that day, combined with taking the dog for a walk.

    The other technique I have is when I feel lonely, I look for someone online who needs something -- either encouragement, or advice on why their sales page isn't converting, etc. helping other people out is a way to feel less lonely.

    You may want to consider a volunteer role which would have you interacting with more people and also give you the satisfaction of helping others.
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  • Profile picture of the author Tommy Smith
    I never get bored in my room while infront of my pc. I have friends that i usually chat and share ideas. Often my Tv is on while working.
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    • Profile picture of the author WikiWarrior
      How about playing an MMO (Massively Multiplayer Online) game? That would give you a short burst of social interaction and a nice break from work too. I played a game called World of Warcraft in my mid-twenties and it provided a very immersive social experience - being able to chat in real-time with others and group up for adventures. Nothing compared to face-to-face interaction but if you're in the middle of work and suddenly feel a bit lonely it's always there, just like forums .
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  • Profile picture of the author Larkrise
    Hey there
    Lonliness is a state of mind not necessarily about being with other people. I have felt lonely when surrounded by others and at times, I really love being with myself!

    But the philosophical stuff aside, I imagine you feel less lonely reading these messages as people are talking to you? And I imagine you can get out and about sometimes and interact with others.

    What might be really helpful, would be to actually plan events throughout your week so you know when you are seeing friends and going somewhere. Or even if its a skype chat with a mate who lives a bit too far for a visit.

    Planning time to be with others, time to socialise, time to be outside of your own head - is very important. Otherwise for us online addicts, we can forget the outside world and get wrapped up in our own virtual worlds.

    Get out and about hun and let us know how that works for you
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  • Profile picture of the author Kaysa
    You always be with your own company. So you have to enjoy it.
    Also find things to laugh and be greatful for.

    Hope that help you.
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  • Profile picture of the author profitmaster7
    I schedule lunch or dinner with a friend a couple of times a week. I also take a class in the evening that gets me interacting with others. Sometimes, when I get cabin fever, I run to Walmart and talk with the greeters. They are so sweet!
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  • Profile picture of the author perfectlovehere
    Take at least 1 hour "off" per day to enjoy a different hobby. Maybe a video game or time with your spouse or both at the same time haha.
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  • Profile picture of the author JennyBizz
    Good Lord I've had this problem a lot! In fact, I had quit my day job to work at home as a freelance writer and after 6 months I thought I was going to lose my ever loving mind!

    So, I took a temp job so that I can get a little bit of interaction with other people. I have tons of friends, but since they are all working during the day, I couldn't really spend time with them then.

    Breaking up the day helps. Getting out of the house everyday helps.
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  • Profile picture of the author Cherie25
    Originally Posted by josh123 View Post

    Okay, so I know this is nothing new for entrepreneurs, but it's still an issue for me-how do you deal with the loneliness of working from home? It's not that I have any real close friends at work. But I have plenty of people that I'm around and talk to daily.

    When I'm home (I'm a freelance writer) I work in my room by myself all day. My job really doesn't require any phone conversations or face-to-face meetings, so it can get real lonely.

    Anybody else in the same boat? If so, how do you deal with it? Thanks a lot!
    Hi, I also live alone but do not have the problem of feeling isolated or alone even though I live on a mountain in an isolated location. I have my dog who talks to me constantly and my two cats that annoy the dog constantly.

    If I feel the need for voices I put a movie on and just let it run in the background, this seems to work for me.

    I can also see the outdoors and the changing scene is very relaxing.

    As a writer turn to your inner self and let that person out and you may be surprised to realise you are not as lonely as you thought. Sometimes we are a product of our upbringing and what we have been taught.
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  • Profile picture of the author charto911
    Originally Posted by josh123 View Post

    Okay, so I know this is nothing new for entrepreneurs, but it's still an issue for me-how do you deal with the loneliness of working from home? It's not that I have any real close friends at work. But I have plenty of people that I'm around and talk to daily.

    When I'm home (I'm a freelance writer) I work in my room by myself all day. My job really doesn't require any phone conversations or face-to-face meetings, so it can get real lonely.

    Anybody else in the same boat? If so, how do you deal with it? Thanks a lot!
    It's funny because the grass is always greener on the otherside I love working anywhere I please including the house while others miss the cameraderie of the office. To be honest your freedom is a priceless thing to have if you want an office to work out of with other people I am sure you can find one or make your business big enough where you need to have an office.
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  • Profile picture of the author Ben_R
    I'm alone but not lonely
    never get like that - so all i can say is - its part of your psychology -course i have a n amazing family and friends but i spend 12 + hours a day working freelance

    if you have things to do you engage your mind and can ignore all distractions - this is a powerfull truth i have come to know

    also what they mean by knowledge is power is not only that it gives you power to do things and with people but that it makes you more stable and grounded -
    - it keep your thoughts on track

    also rememberer that we are part of teh 10% of teh world that have this opportunity - - over a billion people dont have any clean water -- and thats happening right now
    -like tont robbins says all teh time - a day above ground is a reason to be happy -

    I hope you feel better : )
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