ARTICLE:When to give up on your goals...at least temporarily

14 replies
There is a common phrase in personal development and the business world; 'Never give up'. As with most generalities, the truth is, it is a bit more complex than that but the problem is some individuals treat it as an absolute.

But I am going to ask you a different question;

when is it ok and even best to quit your idea?

It is true that success takes time, dedication and a certain amount of 'never say die' attitude. However what I think is more important is the awareness and routine of checking in with yourself to establish what you are pursuing is congruent with the rest of your world.

Firstly no one can make the decision about quitting other than you. 'Never give up' is a generalised quip that does not fit every context, so in my view here are 3 situations where it might be more beneficial to consider quitting...at least temporarily.

1. When the financial cost of continuing outweighs the benefits it is generating.

Motivational speakers love to talk about when they started they were either homeless or living in an apartment with a mouse as their only company, until they learnt the secret to wealth.

Without discounting that most biographical stories fall victim to a certain amount of 'self-editing', whilst this may be true, the road to success doesn't have to be the worst hardship possible in your life. You can throw money at a broken ship, but if it still has a hole in it, it WILL sink. It would be best to sort your finances out first before continuing to lose money.

Michel Ellseberg in his book 'education of millionaires' talks about this when he explains that it is much harder to achieve success if you break out in a cold sweat every time a bill comes through the door. He advises to get your finances sorted first before getting stuck into achieving success.

2.When your passion for the idea has diminished and you find your focus is straying to other things

I remember my goals when I was 20 are different to what they are now. Im not unique either and it is not unusual for people to 'fall out of love' with their goals. There is no shame in that and it is not because you weren't determined in the first place to achieve the goal.

It just means your life changed and now your focus is on achieving another goal. If your personality allows you to be dedicated to one goal, it's clear you'll be dedicated in another goal; one where you might go far in!

3.When continuing is damaging your relationships and health.

So you dream of that 6 figure pay day. Every day you imagine seeing the figure in your bank balance and can feel the excitement building in every muscle fibre of your body...then you wake in the doctors office being told you are dangerously overweight and crying because your family have left you.

Being successful requires a certain amount of sacrifice, however if the result of that sacrifice results in the detriment of natural human needs (love, connection, health), YOU ARE SCREWED & you will feel the full effects of that!

To conclude, only you can decide to continue when the world appears to be against you. Being able to check in with yourself and see whether you have the motivation and drive to keep moving is a strength in character that can save you a lot of time best served in focussing on what your current passion is.

Let me hear your thoughts and please share to someone you feel may benefit from this

Aaron Morton
aaronmorton.co.uk - Fancy a finely tuned mindset?
#articlewhen #give #goalsat #temporarily
  • Profile picture of the author Mary Wilhite
    That's not giving up. It is re-engineering! Anyway thanks for the useful insights.
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  • Profile picture of the author abugah
    Now, two things emerge...
    1. Motivational speakers are just like you and me. Their teachings cannot work 100% to everyone 100% of the time. In fact, what most do is give guidelines. It would be naive that one would expect 100% results all the time.
    I am not in any way discounting the works of really good people that have changed my life. In fact. I listen to motivational tapes everyday when doing my work out. Occasionally only one item I pick in a one-hour session changes my moods, momentum or believes.

    2. Anybody whose on an journey knows that along the way there will be lions, broken bridges or rocky area to pass. As long as the final destination is still in mind,it is okay to abandon a project and take another that will take you to the promised land.

    After all why take a train when a commercial airline is available, if speed is critical to you.
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  • Profile picture of the author automedix1
    I think everyone needs to re-engineer from time to time. Things come up. The trick is to NOT lose your focus. Sometimes some skill is required.
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Ten
    That is articulated well! I think never give up... on at least some goal, but also don't be afraid to change your goal when needed. And if what you are mentioning is happening, then it is perhaps time to switch to a new goal.
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  • Profile picture of the author 56villages
    They key is not to change your goals. It's to have a vision of where you want to be. Start with the end in mind. Then, find your why. The reason you want what you want has to be emotionally charged. That's how you can bear the blows and hardships.

    It cannot be for example to make money. However, it can be wanting to make sure your daughter or son can go to college so they don't struggle as much as Daddy or Mommy to make ends meet.

    Look, Kennedy wanted to put a man on the moon. His idea was driven by the need to keep America ahead of the curve so Russia didn't win the cold war. It doesn't matter the goals, failures, or successes. It's all about where you see yourself.

    You can always change your approach. As they say, there are many ways to skin a cat. That's why it's very important to have moments of self reflection. Moments when you ask yourself what you are doing that is not working. As a result, you can create your start doing and stop doing list.

    You gotta keep going. You gotta keep moving. You gotta keep stepping. Don't give up. Just change what is not working.
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  • Profile picture of the author MaryK
    Re-engineering, being flexible with your goals. Sometimes we have to put them on the 'back burner' but that doesn't mean 'giving up'.
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  • Profile picture of the author richim1
    Thanks for your great post AaronMorton...
    Re-engineering is the keyword here...
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  • Profile picture of the author darrenchow
    Change the method to achieve the same goal.

    Like Bruce Lee said:
    Don't get set into one form, adapt it and build your own, and let it grow, be like water. Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless — like water. Now you put water in a cup, it becomes the cup; You put water into a bottle it becomes the bottle; You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.
    So, be water my friend =))
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    • Profile picture of the author mervyngoh
      Originally Posted by darrenchow View Post

      Change the method to achieve the same goal.

      Like Bruce Lee said:


      So, be water my friend =))
      Hi Darren,

      Love your Bruce lee and the water part

      We must be flexible in whatever we do.
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  • Profile picture of the author calebciantar
    Pretty good share, thanks!
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  • Profile picture of the author nickbrander
    Give up when that thing risks your health, Learn computers, there are many ways to start a new goal there.
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  • Profile picture of the author loudletters
    Give up when you have found a goal (or task) which is much more important and dearer to you.
    1. Chosing between a financial goal which requires lot of time & energy and may not be as rewarding as expected And giving time to your family (wife & children)

    2. If task is simply unattainable. people may say that 'never give up','try till u die' etc but reality is everyone can not do everything. If someone asks you to put toothpaste back in the tube, better give up then drain yourself
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  • Profile picture of the author alexfallon
    Thank you for sharing your ideas. It is good to take some time out first to think of what you really want and need to do. Just don't ever give up.
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