HAVING A DIFFERENT PERCEPTION OF FAILURE

12 years ago

Fear of failure is very real. I guess that's the reason I never took action for a very long time. There's something inside of me that keeps telling me I'm not good enough or I don't know enough. It's really a dream killer and I believe it's the main reason majority of marketers never took action.

I used to believe that failure is a permanent thing. If I tried something and failed, I thought to myself that was it and it defines who I am & there's nothing I can do about it.

Now I'm glad those beliefs are gone. It took me quite some time to overcome it, and it's not easy. It's like if you want to change something in your life, you have to work at it and do thing differently than before.

There's a story I once read, I just can't remember the author. It's about a cute little boy who idolizes his dad & wants to grow just like him. One day while quietly sitting and fishing together, the boy asks his father:

Son: Dad, I want to be brave just like you when I grow up
but how can I do that? I'm always afraid especially
during at night when I am alone in my room...

The father just smiled and tried to explain to his child these
things in a very simple way so that the boy would understand.

Dad: Son, it's like having two dogs with two opposite traits,
one is very brave and courageous while the other one
is very fearful and timid. They always fight and
squabble trying to win your attention.

Thinking very deep, the son curiously asked his father...

Son: Dad, who won between the two dogs?

The father softly replied...

Dad: The 'one' you feed the most...

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SteveSki 12 years ago

For years I let fear stop me from taking action. But it was also fear... the fear of hunger that motivated me to take everything I learned over the years, add a few new twists of my own to it. The result is I went from a JOB (just over broke) to an instant business that makes me over $500 per hour.

But I'm starting to get to comfortable again and need to push myself to expand my comfort zone even more.

Most of us are not willing to push pass the small fears that stop us from taking action until there's a gun to our head... then it's surprising what you can accomplish.

Cheers,
Steve
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Dexter Morgan

12 years ago

I do not believe in failure. It is not failure if you enjoyed the process.

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Odahh

12 years ago

it is not really a fear of failure .. it is an expectacion of failure ..

everything does not come down to fear .. sometimes people get beaten down every time they try something new or different..and the wounds make it hard to try again ..

nervousness while you are doing something is a sign of fear of failure.. flat out not trying.. it an expectation of failure..

the fear of failure is totally dependent on the social ramifications of failure in that certain thing ..

right now i don't appraoch very beutiful women to flirt with them..there is a certain expectaion of failure that make trying not worth it in my current condition ..but a good look in a womans eyes and i can tell if it would be worth it if my conditions where better ..

most fear is from the lack of a defined purpose ... the first goal in life is to find your purpose..

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SteveSki

12 years ago

Originally Posted by Odahh

it is not really a fear of failure .. it is an expectacion of failure ..

everything does not come down to fear ...

right now i don't appraoch very beutiful women to flirt with them..there is a certain expectaion of failure that make trying not worth it in my current condition ..

If you were driving down Hollywood Blv on a hot summer night and I was sitting next to you and pulled out a 357 magnum, pointed it at you and said... if you don't walk up to a beautiful woman and start flirting with her within the next 2 min you are history... you would have no problem stopping your car, walking up to a beautiful woman on the street and saying... when was the last time a total stranger pulled over just to talk to you?

Everyone gets so so hung up on trying to eliminate fear from their life that they seldom ever are willing to take even a small risk. The trick is to transform fear into excitement and energy because you'll never be able to eliminate it.

Do that and you won't fail... Sure a beautiful woman may say... you're not my type so buzz off... but you won't feel like a failure if you say so what... next... and approach 20 more.

However... you will feel like a failure if you fail to take that risk.

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Odahh

12 years ago

Originally Posted by SteveSki

If you were driving down Hollywood Blv on a hot summer night and I was sitting next to you and pulled out a 357 magnum, pointed it at you and said... if you don't walk up to a beautiful woman and start flirting with her within the next 2 min you are history... you would have no problem stopping your car, walking up to a beautiful woman on the street and saying... when was the last time a total stranger pulled over just to talk to you?

Everyone gets so so hung up on trying to eliminate fear from their life that they seldom ever are willing to take even a small risk. The trick is to transform fear into excitement and energy because you'll never be able to eliminate it.

Do that and you won't fail... Sure a beautiful woman may say... you're not my type so buzz off... but you won't feel like a failure if you say so what... next... and approach 20 more.

However... you will feel like a failure if you fail to take that risk.

I am a very unique case.. and would not attract such life or death out comes for choices like that ..

I am currently getting my life back together ..and designing the life i want to have.. stuffing any woman in to the role of girlfriend ..because she seemed the first willing to be there has never turned out well for me ..and the grab the first willing or taking what i think i can get approach has always come up painfull or just not satisfying ..

As things go badly when both parties realize you are what the other really wanted .

I am changing the circumstances now .. as i know what i want ..and again one good look in a womans eyes and i can tell if the ride will be worth taking ..because what is inside the shell matters more than the shell ..

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blogzer

12 years ago

failure if you do nothing at all.

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Evocess

12 years ago

People have different perception of failure. Most people see failure as a worst thing that would happen to their lives but for others they see failure as their guide to lead them to success. It is just a matter on how you see things. Just try figure out all the positive and negative outputs that might come if you failed. Then you'll see the answer.

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amberperry

12 years ago

i agree with blogzer

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SteveSki 12 years ago

Marketing legend Dan Kennedy talked about fear and using Psychos-Cybernetics to avoid being paralysed by it on his blog just yesterday June 7th at: Small Business Marketing Blog | Glazer-Kennedy Insiders Circle He says "It is never to late too conquer worries and fears...it only takes courage to take action and seize your opportunities"

Cheers,
Steve
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acaforreal

12 years ago

Just to appreciate everybody in the discussion and to congratulate fellow warrior Romi and SteveSki for finaly caging the fears in them and pushing their lives in the direction they want it to be.

It all happened as a result of change of believe just as Anthony Robbins said that all personal breakthroughs begin with a change in belief

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Romi 12 years ago

This might be a little off-topic but I feel this might help people resolve their fear of failure big time & redefine their perception of fear and what they need to do and finally take action.

The Most Important Skill Of Achievers

PS: This is not an affiliate link & if I'm violating something in the forum rules, the mods can delete this post.

Hope this helps...

Thanks,
Romi
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successproducts

12 years ago

All if not most millionaires suffer humiliation and ridicules before they make it. I guess you have to hit bottom before you can go up. Something about perseverance that all of us have to learn before we are handed the golden cup of success.

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Robin Hardesty 12 years ago

I understood more about how I view failure when I took the time to read some personality books. When I learned what my personality type was, it made sense why I made (and still make) some of the choices I do. Some people are naturally more cautious and concerned with how people see them and others could care less. This is just a piece of the puzzle but when you know your tendencies, you can begin to counteract them. Reading lots of books about the success process helps too!
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stopper

12 years ago

If at first you you dont succeed just pick up you self and try again and again and again and again

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David Sneen

12 years ago

Failure means quitting and giving up on a doable, worthwhile project.

Temporarily failure means the opportunity to try again, with a bit of education and knowledge that the previously tried method doesn't work.

"Success is the achievement of a worthwhile goal." Zig Zieglar

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David Sneen

It's what you do when no one is watching

that determines what you will be able to

do when everyone is watching.

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aitsco

12 years ago

I've learned to overcome most of my fears by applying the principle of Autosuggestion....I'v been researching the principle of Autosuggestion and the effect it has on the subconscious mind in attracting wealth....Faith in achieving any goal you set in life is a state of mind that can be attained through the practice of the principle of Autosuggestion (a.k.a. Self-suggestion). Check out the site below for more info.

http://www.totalwellbeingsolutions.com/