The Successful/Unsuccessful Difference

5 replies
People often ask what is the difference between someone who is successful and someone who is unsuccessful - what sets them apart? If someone is looking to find a secret, or to find a magic formula, they are going to be disappointed. There is no magic solution, but the answer is actually simple.

Not easy, but it is simple.

The answer is mindset. Yes, you have likely heard this before, however that is because it is true. Successful people think about problems differently, they think about opportunities differently, and they think about obstacles differently.

To develop that mindset is not 'unlearnable' it is not something that is limited to those with advanced degrees, and it is not something that is out of reach for people. It is a choice. It is something people must decide.

So success is, to break it down to the most basic element, a choice.

Consider the four main points I have in this graphic:

None of those four points are bringing up anything that would require any more of you than the choice you make when a situation presents itself.

What do you find yourself doing more:
  • Blaming others for your current circumstances, or taking responsibility for your current circumstances?
  • Hoping that the right opportunities will become available to you, or taking the steps needed to create the opportunities you desire?
  • Wishing that things would change in your life, or taking the action needed to makes those changes happen?
  • Seeing an obstacle in your way and complaining about how much harder (or impossible) that will make what you want come true, or seeing that obstacle as an opportunity for you to learn and grow?
Those are all mindset questions. You get to pick which mindset you will have as you move forward in life.

For most, making that choice is scary; that is a big leap to jump from one mindset to the other, so don't feel bad if it seems a bit overwhelming. Just know that once you make that jump, once you are on the other side, you will begin to see the entire world differently.

If it seems too much, pick one area at a time. For example, simply stop blaming others for your current situation. Don't even worry about building new plans yet, just stop blaming others. When you find yourself thinking or speaking something that is a blame statement, stop yourself. That's it.

Spend time on that one area, and then move to another. Don't worry about trying to change your mindset about everything all at once, that can be too much for too many people, so pick one and change that.
Give yourself the power, you'll be amazed at what you can change!

So, which one are you? What choice have you made?
  • Profile picture of the author Michael Ten
    Nice. That is a simple and useful list. It does not have 100 items on each side which can be almost too much information sometimes. Taking personal responsibility is so important!
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    • Profile picture of the author heavysm
      When i used to work in my fathers kitchen it would make be cringe to hear people continuously not taking responsibility for their actions. Blaming others and not learning to be thick skinned about your mistakes is a huge part of the learning process. Yes, I messed up, it was me...can can we move on?

      I actually met a guy on the train during the holidays that just happened to have that go-getter attitude. He was a financial adviser and you could just tell he was the types that just dripping to get things done. He didn't even want to hear my examples of people blaming others or not facing up to responsibility. It was all bullshit to him.

      The transformation from follower to leader is a big one, and you might stumble a bit if you're not used to it. But damn, does it have its rewards overall.
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  • Profile picture of the author sandyjameson
    Great post, your 4 point are really right.. i should change my mindset, i sure i can change my future, thanks man
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  • Profile picture of the author eternalsongbird
    I can share my success with everyone, but cannot share my failure with anyone. The load of failure is only and only mine.
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  • Profile picture of the author mmrumii
    The difference between successful and unsuccessful is like that of sky and land. They are just opposite to each other.
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