How To Learn When To Say "No!"

11 replies
Let's face it! Many people just seem to have great difficulty in saying "no" or denying any favor asked from them. As a result, they often find themselves trapped in the middle of nowhere because of their own hastened decision or acceptance of an unfavorable task - just because at one particular point in their life, they were afraid to say "no."

For those who are constantly faced with this problem, the following tips will prove to be useful.

1. Do not occupy yourself with things that do not concern you.

If you habitually engage in something you hardly know anything about, you are making your situation far worse than the one who does nothing at all. On the other hand, some people seem to get satisfaction by intervening in other people's business. Always be alert and possess utmost care to ensure that no one meddles in your own affairs. Good moderation in all areas of life will be helpful in the end.

2. Decide first whether a task is worth your precious time.

Just a simple thought: If it will just eat your time away from the more important things you consider in your life, then it's not worth your time. Period.

3. Avoid incurring obligations beyond your capacity.

Instead, nurture your skills and abilities for the time being. There will come a right time for you to step up; and when that perfect moment arrives, waste no opportunity. But as long as you are not sure of the outcome, say "no" for the meantime especially if the favor will just derail your strategy.

4. It is always harder to come out well from an incurred undesirable obligation than to avoid the embarrassing situation of not committing yourself from the very start.

It is a judgment test for anyone. Ask this question to yourself, "Do I want to avoid them or conquer them?

5. If you have to think, take a break and take your time.

Matters that can cause an adverse change in your life require a lot of thinking. There are times when people act on first impulse, on what they feel and think at that very instant. Certainly, this is not always the case.

Although less commonly known to people, acquiring tasks (no matter how simple they may seem) is synonymous to putting your honor at stake once you allow yourself to be involved. Be sure that when you put your name and honor on the line, everything will end up well.

It takes as much courage for a person to earn a responsibility as to deny it. Whatever you decide on, always keep in mind that there is nothing wrong in saying "no." When in doubt, it may even be the best thing to do.
#learn #negotiation #say no
  • Profile picture of the author JCorp
    Yes, learning to say NO is powerful... NO to people, and especially NO to opportunities.

    Opportunities are so abundant right now that you've got to learn how to say NO and focus on what you've got going on right now, as well as only the projects you really see yourself doing.

    Great post!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9028133].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author TriggerIM
      Only say "yes" to the things that you know you're good at, and you're golden!

      Find more fun internet marketing BS HERE :)

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9028181].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author ryanbiddulph
    Super! #2 vibes with me. I let go anything which does not vibe with me. Let somebody else handle it so I can do what's important, and relevant, to help people best.
    Ryan Biddulph helps you to be a successful blogger with his courses, manuals and blog at Blogging From Paradise
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9028306].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Dain Supero
    Great post. Setting boundaries for things and behaviour you will and won't accept cultivates self-respect. That in turn gets actual respect from others. Nobody wants to respect someone who doesn't respect himself or herself

    Visit for proven advice and techniques to elevate your mind, body, and self-image.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9029064].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Moneymaker2012
    Good point!
    everyone should make their decisions with proper planning and analyzing different factors, and make up their mind before accepting any challenge.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9029614].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author aloeveraa
    Originally Posted by Marco Moeschter View Post

    2. Decide first whether a task is worth your precious time.

    Just a simple thought: If it will just eat your time away from the more important things you consider in your life, then it's not worth your time. Period.
    True that. The key to that is to value your own time (and yourself) above everything else.

    Remember that this is YOUR life, live it on your own terms. Don't live a life trying to please EVERYONE ELSE.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9038405].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author David Braybrooke
    How to learn when to say "No!"?
    What's to learn? If you don't want to do something just say it! Simple.
    Countless hours of therapy and changing people pleasing behaviours no longer required.
    "The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage." - Mark Russell
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9040067].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Graham Darch
    :rolleyes: When enough is enough
    then its time to say NO
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9041022].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author eric669
      Great post.
      I especially agree with number 5
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9049685].message }}

Trending Topics