14 replies
The statement can be frustrating itself.
As hard as it may be to think otherwise, it is near impossible to "not" do something.

Is it because by "not" thinking about failure, you will always think of it.
Is it because "not" is so insignificant compared to the thought we are trying to avoid, we instead think of that thought appose to the goal of "not".

It is funny how the human brain works with how we process the things we want to do.
Ironically, what we focus our attention towards thinking or doing, is more often different than what we believe we are trying to think or do....
Think more of the things we want to do, and the thoughts we wish didn't exist will be irrelevant to what we are trying to do.

Am I making sense with this?


I see a lot of people posting don't do this, don't do that, avoid this and avoid that.

To me it seems to be hyper focusing the wrong points...

Sometimes, it only takes rearranging sentences to better focus the correct goals. Using statements like the ones below can do just that.
Instead Try..
Try doing...
Think about improving...
Push towards having...

#dont do #human brain #negative #self discipline #self help
  • Profile picture of the author only1rodez
    I like your way of thinking. I see a lot of that too and it has discouraged me in the past. Crazy how the brain does the opposite of what you really want it to do sometimes. If someone tells me don't pay attention to it to much, then i see myself paying more attention to whatever I am not suppose to be paying attention to. If thing were worded a little differently like you said for instance "try this instead" then i am sure it would help out others as it would definitely help me. I also have adhd so my brain is all over the place all the time and things like that don't help. I definitely need to get more self discipline under my belt and manage my time better.
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  • Profile picture of the author Maximus93
    It has been shown in psychology that adopting positive goals rather than negative ones work better in motivation. "I will be" is more powerful than "I want to be", "I choose to" better than "I should".

    As for your post, the first half didn't really make sense to me but the last half did resonate. If you write on your wall "Don't forget to fail" you have three words out of four with negative connotations. If you write "I will choose to succeed" it creates more positive thought, thereby ingraining the message better.
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  • Profile picture of the author C G
    Nice post.

    As far as possible always think in the positive. When you are about to take action on something don't think of why it will not work, or that it's going to be to hard or boring etc.

    See yourself having fun and succeeding doing the task.

    Cheers,

    C.G.
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    • Profile picture of the author footpod
      The word NOT plants the seed of the opposite

      "Do NOT run" can be rephrased as "Walk"

      "Do NOT park here" can be rephrased as "keep clear"

      "Do NOT touch" leads people to thing "I wonder what happens when I DO..."


      See Change your Words. Change your Life! - Remember The Ice : Remember The Ice
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      • Profile picture of the author Aaron0669
        I think it is only human nature to say things in a negative way to emphasise the downside of it.
        This reminds of the time when my son was around 2 yrs old (I think) and just learnt how to talk and also starting to be grab everything his hand could get hold off. Naturally, I kept telling him "Don't do this.. ", don't do that. Then one fine day he replied, "everything's problem" to my shock and amusement.
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        • Profile picture of the author footpod
          Originally Posted by Aaron0669 View Post

          I think it is only human nature to say things in a negative way to emphasise the downside of it.
          This reminds of the time when my son was around 2 yrs old (I think) and just learnt how to talk and also starting to be grab everything his hand could get hold off. Naturally, I kept telling him "Don't do this.. ", don't do that. Then one fine day he replied, "everything's problem" to my shock and amusement.
          It's hardwired into kids. Just the other day - I saw a small child being carried by his mother.

          Mother says "I'm not carrying you all day"

          Child thinks "You are at the moment - so result..."
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          • Profile picture of the author damiensuccess
            Originally Posted by footpod View Post

            It's hardwired into kids. Just the other day - I saw a small child being carried by his mother.

            Mother says "I'm not carrying you all day"

            Child thinks "You are at the moment - so result..."
            "I will carry you until this"
            "I will carry you here, and then you walk"


            Telling the child what you are not going to do and emphasizing what the child wants you to do "Carry", simply frustrates the situation.

            Explain in the same sentence why the kid should Want to walk.

            "When we get to the shop, I want you to show me how much stronger your legs are today!"

            "I want to see if you can walk as far as I can when we get to the "Red Stop Sign", So tell me when you find a red stop sign and I'll let you down to go touch it!"

            There are many ways of improving how we say things to be more positive, but most people automatically jump to the Don't and Do Not option because it is the EASIEST response that requires barely any brain power to come up with.


            "Think before you Speak" Will show you Great Results but..
            "Think positive before you Speak" Will show you Positive Results
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            • Profile picture of the author footpod
              Originally Posted by damiensuccess View Post

              "I will carry you until this"
              "I will carry you here, and then you walk"


              Telling the child what you are not going to do and emphasizing what the child wants you to do "Carry", simply frustrates the situation.

              Explain in the same sentence why the kid should Want to walk.

              "When we get to the shop, I want you to show me how much stronger your legs are today!"

              "I want to see if you can walk as far as I can when we get to the "Red Stop Sign", So tell me when you find a red stop sign and I'll let you down to go touch it!"

              There are many ways of improving how we say things to be more positive, but most people automatically jump to the Don't and Do Not option because it is the EASIEST response that requires barely any brain power to come up with.


              "Think before you Speak" Will show you Great Results but..
              "Think positive before you Speak" Will show you Positive Results
              I know all this mate - just shows you how it gets hard wired into kids...
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            • Profile picture of the author Aaron0669
              Originally Posted by damiensuccess View Post

              "I will carry you until this"
              "I will carry you here, and then you walk"


              Telling the child what you are not going to do and emphasizing what the child wants you to do "Carry", simply frustrates the situation.

              Explain in the same sentence why the kid should Want to walk.

              "When we get to the shop, I want you to show me how much stronger your legs are today!"

              "I want to see if you can walk as far as I can when we get to the "Red Stop Sign", So tell me when you find a red stop sign and I'll let you down to go touch it!"

              There are many ways of improving how we say things to be more positive, but most people automatically jump to the Don't and Do Not option because it is the EASIEST response that requires barely any brain power to come up with.


              "Think before you Speak" Will show you Great Results but..
              "Think positive before you Speak" Will show you Positive Results
              Thanks for the tip. I'll try it. I have a 4 year old daughter and always asked to be carried by me. And of course, i obliged. Just couldn't resist her cuteness.
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  • Profile picture of the author talfighel
    When society teaches you that you can't do this or do that, guess what happens when you want to do something?

    Your parents have always told you "don't do this and don't do that". You have been programmed over the years to think that you can't do some things.

    Especially when you get started online and you tell people who are close to you that you want to make money online. They tell you that you can't so your mind shuts off and you don't even attempt to do anything.
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  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    i live in the united states of america ..i think we write a neww thousand page book on don't do ever day ..one day your fine the next day half of what you do is outlawed .

    the problem comes when to get anything done ..you have to ignore these new rules or break them .. or face not being able to support yourself .

    you look back at all the other rules and start picking and chosing which to follow .

    many do's and don't that where dumped on you in the past ..if they where valid at some point may not be valid now .. and much of the stuff we where told was impossible ..was that for those who told us ..and because they couldn't do it of course they didn't think we could do it .

    my parents are in their 70's and their sibling are older ..and the advice i get is to do things to build up benifits for retirement ..which will be like 80 or 90 by the time i get there
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  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    as more and more things become possible as tech progress is made

    legions of people appeare to tell you what can't be done or you can no longer do
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    • Profile picture of the author Memetics
      To not do something the mind first has to think of it and then negate it. The unconscious processes the concept then the conscious negates it. Avoid negatives if you're trying to persuade something then just use the opposite meaning. Like the poster above says, if you want someone to stop running then say "walk" instead.

      It's the unconscious which makes the decision so priming it with the concept you wish to avoid is counterproductive.
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  • Profile picture of the author WilloxPerez
    This is truly interesting and something to ponder about. You are right on point in focusing on the perspective of positive energy and flow by knowing the things that can be done to improve yourself instead of the things you should not do.

    It is a simple shift of focusing more on solutions to solve the problem then to focus on what to do to avoid the problem or stop it from happening again.

    At first it is like a tongue twister but it makes perfect sense. =-D
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