I've waited my whole life for this moment

32 replies
  • OFF TOPIC
  • |
From @Renzo_Soprano

  • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
    What was his answer?
    Signature

    "If you think you're the smartest person in the room, then you're probably in the wrong room."

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656192].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author SteveJohnson
    Signature

    The 2nd Amendment, 1789 - The Original Homeland Security.

    Gun control means never having to say, "I missed you."

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656203].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author WalkingCarpet
    Banned
    Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post

    You've been waitin ya whole pathetic life for some cock to cross ya path eh?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656312].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sbucciarel
    Banned
    lol .... This happens at least 793 times at my house every day. Chickens crossing the road. Chickens coming up to the door. Chickens sitting on cars, under cars, on fences. You've waited your whole life for this? Ok. So why did he cross the road?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656556].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
      Originally Posted by sbucciarel View Post

      You've waited your whole life for this?
      No. That's what the original poster titled it on Twitter.
      Ok. So why did he cross the road?
      42.
      Signature
      Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
      So that blind people can hate them as well.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656575].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post


    Just out of the picture is Jared shouting "Heal! Heal!".

    (That's a joke for old time Warriors)
    Signature
    Discover the fastest and easiest ways to create your own valuable products.
    Tons of FREE Public Domain content you can use to make your own content, PLR, digital and POD products.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656622].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      I'm not sure this one counts - he's using the crosswalk and obviously waited for the light to change. This is one cautious chicken....rooster?
      Signature

      Saving one dog will not change the world - but the world will change forever for that one dog.
      It takes nothing away from a human to be kind to an animal.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656811].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
        Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

        he's using the crosswalk and obviously waited for the light to change.
        He's probably done it many times before. It is an old joke after all.
        Signature
        Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
        So that blind people can hate them as well.
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656881].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author MikeTucker
    I admit I never truly got this joke until I was an adult...

    Why did the chicken cross the road?
    To get to the other side!

    Signature

    The bartender says: "We don't serve faster-than-light particles here."

    ...A tachyon enters a bar.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9656891].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author thunderbird
    OK, but why would anyone assume that the rooster's reason is the same as the chicken's?
    Signature

    Project HERE.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9657199].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      the rooster's reason
      ...to get to the hen house?
      Signature

      Saving one dog will not change the world - but the world will change forever for that one dog.
      It takes nothing away from a human to be kind to an animal.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9657212].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
        Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

        ...to get to the hen house?
        Hen's reason?

        To get away from the rooster.

        Now let's solve Claude's Quantum Physics and conspiracy questions.
        Signature

        "If you think you're the smartest person in the room, then you're probably in the wrong room."

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9657243].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
          In Grand Cayman we went to a KFC. Outside, loads of chickens walking about. Crossing the road and back.

          They must have been those evil, cannibal chickens that I have never heard about.
          Signature

          The only thing to fear is Lanfear itself.

          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9657305].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
          Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

          Hen's reason?

          To get away from the rooster.

          Now let's solve Claude's Quantum Physics and conspiracy questions.
          Maybe it's old age. Maybe it's just that I'm a confirmed sarcastic jerk.

          But when I hear the question "Why did the chicken cross the road?" my first thought is;

          To the chicken, it isn't a road. The chicken has no perception that the road begins or ends...it's just a surface to the chicken. So, it isn't getting to the other side. The chicken has no perception of "the other side".

          The chicken is either going toward something or away from something. And I need to know more before I can answer that question.

          Want to know what I'm really thinking? That's what I'm really thinking. And I have to force myself to remember, that the person asking the question, is just joking.
          Signature
          One Call Closing book https://www.amazon.com/One-Call-Clos...=1527788418&sr

          "Those who know that they are profound strive for clarity. Those who would like to seem profound to the crowd strive for obscurity" Friedrich Nietzsche
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9657342].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
            Signature
            TOP TIP: To browse the forum like a Pro, select "View Classic" from the drop-down menu under your user name.

            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9657347].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Maybe it's old age. Maybe it's just that I'm a confirmed sarcastic jerk.

            But when I hear the question "Why did the chicken cross the road?" my first thought is;

            To the chicken, it isn't a road. The chicken has no perception that the road begins or ends...it's just a surface to the chicken. So, it isn't getting to the other side. The chicken has no perception of "the other side".

            The chicken is either going toward something or away from something. And I need to know more before I can answer that question.

            Want to know what I'm really thinking? That's what I'm really thinking. And I have to force myself to remember, that the person asking the question, is just joking.
            Very Spock like thinking there.

            I wonder if the Grand Caymans have the best KFCs.
            Signature

            "If you think you're the smartest person in the room, then you're probably in the wrong room."

            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9657350].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author sbucciarel
            Banned
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Maybe it's old age. Maybe it's just that I'm a confirmed sarcastic jerk.

            But when I hear the question "Why did the chicken cross the road?" my first thought is;

            To the chicken, it isn't a road. The chicken has no perception that the road begins or ends...it's just a surface to the chicken. So, it isn't getting to the other side. The chicken has no perception of "the other side".

            The chicken is either going toward something or away from something. And I need to know more before I can answer that question.

            Want to know what I'm really thinking? That's what I'm really thinking. And I have to force myself to remember, that the person asking the question, is just joking.
            That's a fowl thing to say about chickens. They're smarter than you give them credit for.

            Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

            Shrek: Urrrrrp - What chicken?
            George Bush: To face a kinder, gentler thousand points of headlights
            Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees
            Bob Dylan: How many roads must one chicken cross?
            Robert Frost: To cross the road less traveled by
            Gilligan: The traffic started getting rough; the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail the chicken would be lost, the chicken would be lost!
            Martin Luther King : It had a dream
            James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before
            Sir Isaac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross the road
            Mr. Scott: 'Cos ma wee transporter beam was na functioning properly. Ah canna work miracles, Captain!
            Mae West: I invited it to come up and see me sometime
            George Washington: Actually it crossed the Delaware with me back in 1776
            Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference
            Darth Vader: Because it could not resist the power of the Dark Side
            Lord Baden-Powell: To earn a Road Crossing merit badge
            Colonel Sanders: I missed one?
            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9658664].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
            (Scene: The Comedy Club one Monday night)

            MC: "Ladies and gentlemen, can you please give a big Comedy Club welcome to a new comedian from Ohio - Claude Whitacre!"

            (Cut to shot of audience giving a hearty round of applause, then back to the stage).

            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

            To the chicken, it isn't a road. The chicken has no perception that the road begins or ends...it's just a surface to the chicken. So, it isn't getting to the other side. The chicken has no perception of "the other side".

            The chicken is either going toward something or away from something. And I need to know more before I can answer that question.
            (Cut to shot of audience fast asleep).
            Signature
            Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
            So that blind people can hate them as well.
            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9658711].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author HeySal
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Maybe it's old age. Maybe it's just that I'm a confirmed sarcastic jerk.

            But when I hear the question "Why did the chicken cross the road?" my first thought is;

            To the chicken, it isn't a road. The chicken has no perception that the road begins or ends...it's just a surface to the chicken. So, it isn't getting to the other side. The chicken has no perception of "the other side".

            The chicken is either going toward something or away from something. And I need to know more before I can answer that question.

            Want to know what I'm really thinking? That's what I'm really thinking. And I have to force myself to remember, that the person asking the question, is just joking.
            Well, to the chicken it's "over there" whether there's a road between "here" and "over there" or not, so it's not the chicken's aim that's the question - it's the relevancy of the road.

            That was 3 credit hours and about 500 bucks. I finally got my money's worth.

            Wonderful thread, Wpedia.
            Signature

            Sal
            When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
            Beyond the Path

            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666226].message }}
            • Profile picture of the author TimPhelan
              Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

              Well, to the chicken it's "over there" whether there's a road between "here" and "over there" or not, so it's not the chicken's aim that's the question - it's the relevancy of the road.
              Yes, and why is it assumed that the chicken doesn't perceive the road? Other animals such as dogs, cats, squirrels, etc... realize a road is something to be careful when crossing ( although we have all seen evidence when they make wrong decisions when to cross the road ).

              Chickens are smarter than people think.

              That's right: In multiple tests of cognitive and behavioral sophistication, chickens outperform not just dogs and cats but four-year-old human children.

              Explains the University of Bristol's Dr. Christine Nicol, author of the review paper titled The Intelligent Hen, "[s]tudies over the past 20 years have... revealed their finely-honed sensory capacities, their ability to think, draw inferences, apply logic and plan ahead."
              Chickens: smarter than a four-year-old - NY Daily News
              Signature
              {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9667231].message }}
              • Profile picture of the author Joe Mobley
                Whatever,

                This is one of the best threads in a long time. The title was a great setup. It was you so I totally didn't know what to expect. The pic just made me laugh.

                Good job.

                One Thanks was not enough.

                Joe Mobley
                Signature

                .

                Follow Me on Twitter: @daVinciJoe
                {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9668145].message }}
                • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
                  Originally Posted by Joe Mobley View Post

                  Whatever,

                  This is one of the best threads in a long time. The title was a great setup. It was you so I totally didn't know what to expect. The pic just made me laugh.

                  Good job.

                  One Thanks was not enough.

                  Joe Mobley
                  Thanks, mate.

                  I really can't take credit for the title though. That was the tweet that went with the pic from the source.
                  Signature
                  Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
                  So that blind people can hate them as well.
                  {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9668216].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Sandy You
    not really understand this title with the picture.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9665864].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Richard Van
      Originally Posted by Sandy You View Post

      not really understand this title with the picture.
      Hi Sandy.

      There's a question people ask and that is "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

      Do you know the answer?

      Well this incredible question has stumped some of the finest minds in human history including Einstein, Hawkings, Dawkings and even Gertrude Cumberpants. For centuries scientists, mathematicians and vets around the world have thought about this and asked themselves why.

      Whateverpedia, the chap that posted this thread, was out recently when he spotted this chicken crossing the road so took a photo from his car. Sadly he wasn't able to question the chicken because the lights changed and he didn't see where it went, so the mystery remains.

      Signature

      Wibble, bark, my old man's a mushroom etc...

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666016].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Rick Rodd
    Chicken do anything they want for all I care.

    To return the riddle:

    Why does man keep on asking why I should cross the road, like they own it? Oh... yes they do.
    Signature
    Please follow our Warrior Forum Rules and Regulations!
    WSO Marketplace Rules[/URL]

    Do You have any Questions, Comments or Suggestions?
    Warrior Forum KnowledgebaseWarrior Forum Help DeskSuggestions Forum
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666023].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author trustedmarketer
    That photo brings back memories of the Great Beatles band crossing the road in London.
    Signature
    Contact me for the most Powerful Business Programs that will give you Daily Profit and the predicted huge price appreciation from Bitcoin
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666033].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author johnkingx
    Banned
    [DELETED]
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666054].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Richard Van
      Originally Posted by johnkingx View Post

      photoshop job, the white cars are the tip
      Oh thank the dear Lord for that.

      For a moment there I thought this was a picture of an actual chicken crossing a road.
      Signature

      Wibble, bark, my old man's a mushroom etc...

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666065].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by Richard Van View Post

        Hi Sandy.

        There's a question people ask and that is "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

        Do you know the answer?

        Well this incredible question has stumped some of the finest minds in human history including Einstein, Hawkings, Dawkings and even Gertrude Cumberpants. For centuries scientists, mathematicians and vets around the world have thought about this and asked themselves why.

        Whateverpedia, the chap that posted this thread, was out recently when he spotted this chicken crossing the road so took a photo from his car. Sadly he wasn't able to question the chicken because the lights changed and he didn't see where it went, so the mystery remains.

        Heres why!



        It would make a pretty funny KFC gag, have someone walk in with his chicken, plop him on the front desk and say, cook this up for me, and don't hold back on the 11 secret herbs and spices!

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666122].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author HN
    Banned
    When I saw a thread by whatever about something he waited his whole life for, I knew it would be something extraordinary and certainly worth spending a few minutes to check out, to have, probably, the best laugh of the day; but he just linked someone's photo from the internet, which makes it -- such a disappointment!



    edit: ↓ That's much better, I was expecting something that smart in the first place.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666159].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
    Getting snarky comments from habitual trolls is really what I've been waiting for my whole life.
    Signature
    Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
    So that blind people can hate them as well.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9666181].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author gregdavidson727
    Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post

    It looks like the chicken crossed the road to support his favorite political candidates.
    Signature
    >>> CLICK HERE <<< ====> 2,000 NICHE E-BOOKS WITH MRR & PLR RIGHTS! JUST $2.99! <====
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[9668225].message }}

Trending Topics