If I had a magic wand I would ...

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Please complete the sentence with something "original" and "clean"
  • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
    Originally Posted by BDazzler View Post

    Please complete the sentence with something "original" and "clean"
    Put a small mop head on the end and do the dishes.
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  • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
    I'd enroll at Hogwarts.
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    Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
    So that blind people can hate them as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author FreedomBlogger
    "If I had a magic wand I would ..."
    ... END hunger and poverty in the entire world!!
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by FreedomBlogger View Post

      "If I had a magic wand I would ..."
      ... END hunger and poverty in the entire world!!
      Hope you are not going for the Miss Universe title?
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    • Profile picture of the author HN
      Banned
      Originally Posted by FreedomBlogger View Post

      "If I had a magic wand I would ..."
      ... END hunger and poverty in the entire world!!
      How would you do that? You wave the magic wand and the corporations stop producing and people stop eating meat? So we stop feeding animals 16 pounds of corn/grain to produce 1 pound of meat. Not bad. How about the poverty? Will your magic wand make people stop borrowing money to buy things that they don't need or it will just make the magic press print more money?
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    • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
      Originally Posted by FreedomBlogger View Post

      "If I had a magic wand I would ..."
      ... END hunger and poverty in the entire world!!
      Actually, if you ended hunger, people would just forget to eat. Not good. Better to end famine.

      If fairy tales have taught us anything, it's that you have to be really careful with magic wishes.


      .
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      • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
        Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

        Actually, if you ended hunger, people would just forget to eat. Not good. Better to end famine.

        If fairy tales have taught us anything, it's that you have to be really careful with magic wishes.


        .
        My God, that was funny!
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        • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
          If I had a magic wand, I would take a year or so to figure out what to do with it.

          If every word you uttered changed reality, I'd be very careful what I said.

          But it would involve Jessica Biel.
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          • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            If I had a magic wand, I would take a year or so to figure out what to do with it.
            Don't leave it too long. I think you'll find that most modern wands have a wish-by date.

            They don't make 'em like they used to.


            ..
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            • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
              Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

              Don't leave it too long. I think you'll find that most modern wands have a wish-by date.

              They don't make 'em like they used to.


              ..

              I wish they did.......... Dammit!


              (I hope everyone got that)
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              • Profile picture of the author positivenegative
                Originally Posted by BDazzler View Post

                Please complete the sentence with something "original" and "clean"
                . . . I'd wish for some nice scenery for Claude to admire on a leisurely drive with his good lady.


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              • Profile picture of the author Alast
                Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

                I wish they did.......... Dammit!


                (I hope everyone got that)
                I wish I got it, but I didn---- don't worry, I get it now.
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  • Profile picture of the author sbucciarel
    Banned
    That's easy. Fill up a room with money and gold bars.
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    • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
      Originally Posted by sbucciarel View Post

      That's easy. Fill up a room with money and gold bars.
      And Johnny Depp. I said it, so you are still clean and original.
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    • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
      Originally Posted by sbucciarel View Post

      That's easy. Fill up a room with money and gold bars.
      If you could conjure up anything you want, why would you need money or gold?
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      Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
      So that blind people can hate them as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
    I'd use the wand to whack biz upside the head for being weird.
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    Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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    • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      I'd use the wand to whack biz upside the head for being weird.
      Just helping Suzanne. And, to think I would have given up my turn to put Jessica Biel in your
      room of money and gold.
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      "If you think you're the smartest person in the room, then you're probably in the wrong room."

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      • Profile picture of the author MissTerraK
        I would hide it until I thought of something original and clean to use it for.


        Terra
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        • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
          Originally Posted by MissTerraK View Post

          I would hide it until I thought of something original and clean to use it for.


          Terra
          I feel like you're baiting me.
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          Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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          • Profile picture of the author MissTerraK
            Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

            I feel like you're baiting me.
            Who me? That's ridiculous!

            We all know that you're the master baiter around here!

            She scores!!! LOL!

            Terra
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            • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
              Originally Posted by MissTerraK View Post

              She scores!!! LOL!

              Terra

              With a wand?
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              Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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              • Profile picture of the author MissTerraK
                Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

                With a wand?
                Uh, no Dan, we're talking clean and original with the wand here. Get with the program, darlin'.


                Terra
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                • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
                  Originally Posted by MissTerraK View Post

                  Uh, no Dan, we're talking clean and original with the wand here. Get with the program, darlin'.


                  Terra
                  So, I should cancel the shipment of 9 volt batteries I just sent you?
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                  Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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                  • Profile picture of the author MissTerraK
                    Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

                    So, I should cancel the shipment of 9 volt batteries I just sent you?

                    Heck No!

                    Do you realize how many of my grandkids' things require those?

                    Thanks! You're such a sweetheart!


                    Terra
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  • Profile picture of the author cashcowonline
    master the craft to make many more such wands....lol
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      No, l would wish for...

      • An Uncle Scrooge money bin, (l want to find out if l could swim through cold, smelly coins)?

      But 9 octrillion dollars wouldn't hurt!


      • Go back in time and kill off Vordamort when he was young and a pushover, (saves me all the fight scenes and suffering in a dreary forest).

      • Have a date with the sexy green woman out of "Guardians of the Galaxy"!


      • Put a free energy generator in every poor house on the planet, then sit back and watch the sociopaths run for cover!


      Should be a big help in ending poverty, and hunger!



      PS not going for the miss Universe title, but "Walking Carpet", not sure?
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  • Profile picture of the author Rick Rodd
    create a lot more magic wands and sell them for a higher mark up cost... Only 2 left!
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