Are You Embarrassed about your name? A serious question?

Nope! I love my name...it's very down to earth.

I have no clue why a lot of people do the things they do, so I'm afraid I can't help you there except for maybe the quality of being anal?

I understand people fearful and therefore protective of their privacy and some people operate under the guise of pseudonyms and want that protected, but other than that, I'm not sure.


Terra

As long as they're paying you, what does it ultimately matter? I get the common courtesy angle, but it isn't so common anymore. Whether from Jane Smith or SmedlakTheMerciless4956842, the money spends the same.

Besides, won't you find out their name when they pay you?

Some services absolutely require personal information for legal reasons. Unless that's an issue for you, I'd chalk it up to privacy concerns and get back at it.

Maybe I am being anal or simply being old school. I prefer to call somebody Laurence or Fred or Mary than hbqrs567.
But I do appreciate the broad spectrum of answers as well.

I would say it is the fear of giving up power/position to a potential vendor before the relationship begins. It is the same reason most people don't put contact info into a craigslist ad, keeping their identity anonymous until a relationship begins..

It is much harder to negotiate effectively if the balance of power is so uneven. The client seeks to maintain that advantage as long as possible.

Craigslist is different when advertising. I am talking about when you make contact with somebody and are either getting a quote or asking for advice.
I doubt Richard would worry about your comment Dan but I do agree that Zoltan might.

You see, laurence, the internet has this tradition of using pseudonyms. Usually based on video games

Like for example Darksniper45.
i_luv_ganking_n00bs

or notable figures:
Spartacus24
Robespierre_pwns_n00bs
KimJungIl_4_the_win
Monica_Lewinsky

Well, not having played video games myself, I don't see the attraction. I guess being a baby boomer, at almost the youngest of that group (yesterday actually), I haven't gotten into things that gen Y and gen X and whatever the newest gen is called do nowadays.

Some people work and shop online because they prefer the anonymity of it. If a person's name isn't paramount to the work you're doing, then there should be no reason to require it. Especially just for a quote. What difference would having a name make in your quote?

Gary, the name doesn't make a difference to the actual quote. My point is that if you take your business seriously, why be afraid of sharing your first name?
I agree with Claude that if people don't give their first name, that isn't good and you may rethink the deal.

I also think that a name helps develop trust which is needed from the beginning.

Between you and me, you might be well advised to be a bit careful regarding the legitimacy (not to mention the exchangeability) of the currency in which that Smedlak pays his bills: they don't call him "merciless" just for fun, you know. My cousin Jane, on the other hand ... ...

Fair point: now you mention it, I've never actually seen them in the same room at the same time.

Not sure, Laurence.

I appreciate that with your services, most of your work is perhaps going to come from individuals, and they're going to pay you by PayPal anyway? But suppose someone (like me?) were using a pen-name for a niche site/business and paid you using a PayPal business account, without the individual's name showing in the transaction: you wouldn't necessarily know that it's a pen-name, I think?

I suspect you're making this point with reference to "transactions in which payment is involved"?

I use a different pen-name in each niche, but I use it throughout the niche: on the website; in the autoresponder; on the emails I send out to publishers/webmasters offering them an article to publish in exchange for a clickable link (admittedly, there's typically no money involved in that "deal", though), and so on. Nobody ever asks me if I'm using pen-name. I'm not sure how I'd react if they did. Probably I'd say something like "Well, if I were, and told you, it wouldn't be much of a pen-name any more, would it?".

I accept that, but it's just as easy to build trust in a pen-name as in one's real name? Part of the point of it being a pen-name is that people don't know it's a pen-name, surely?


.

People ask why I don't use my real name on the forum. Because it's Cecil Deadloaf. Not very appealing, wouldn't you agree?

First off - my name doesn't embarrass me, but I don't like "Sally", so I just shorten it to "Sal" which is fine, still pretty much my name, and is extremely informal, just the way I like it.

Second - I get what you are saying Laurence. Even if a person is using a pen name I'd think it's easier to speak with someone when you have something to actually call them. Most of us figure that the percentage of possibility that any name given to us online is not necessarily a real name, but it is less awkward talking to someone when you can call them something that signals that you recognize them as an individual.

Not at all I like it and I am confident with it!

When I was a child growing up I was.
Kim was either two things, a girls name or an Asian name and I was neither.
In 3rd grade they made me use my middle name because there was a girl in the class named Kim.
Growing up your name is your identity. It can be traumatic being made to change your identity at a young age.

Sometimes when people ask my name and I say Laurence, they say "Warren" or "Lauren" or "what?" So I say Laurence as in Laurence of Arabia and I often get a smile or a laugh then. I have never known many Laurences over the years but my acting agent's name was Laurence.

I also get people spelling it LaWrence when that is most often a surname, not a first name. But I do like my name.
I know some people make up names online but at least having something to call them is better than "hey you."

One thing that amuses me, (me and my scifi leanings again) what if in the year 2122 they have a census for "usernames", which is also would be your given birthname. Would you be comfortable named as example: Richard033210-A?

The Ood had it worst, remember that. (A Dr. Who reference)

I don't see any harm in using a pseudonym. BUT I find it weird to have to call someone dy56htr73845. Why not just say John or Fred or something?

I would not trust a single person that would not give me their name, contact information,

At the end of the day. You have to think about your own image. Do you want to be associated with a person or company that seems shady. If people question your decision making, they will question your advice and content.

I would have a strict policy about this. The other "party" will typically always have their best interest at heart, not yours. So just be careful. If in doubt, screenshot your interactions. Keep a well documented log of everything. You do not want o be at the end of a scam or joke.

Hope all is well!

I feel that is embarrassing when some one called my name, I prefer being called with a nickname. Perhaps, those people who have such feeling may be shy or lack confidence,

I HATE my real name. Plus nobody calls me it in real life ( so technically it's not my real name, right?) But you also want to build personal relationships with people. Nicknames are cool, pen names are a no-no.

Not at all. Any time its required for business I always give my full name and contact information.

But I've only met 5 people in 20 years that have ever pronounced my last name correctly after an initial meeting. It doesn't bother me all that much. But it does get awkward at times.

Over the years my friends gave me the nickname "Base" for my voice so I started using that as my pin name \ screen name.

It just kinda stuck.

Well, for my FIRST name, everyone knows it. It at least WAS a pretty standard name in English speaking countries, and has close variants in several other countries. To the best of my knowledge, it has NO reference to anything bad or embarasing, so I am happy about it. My middle name is the same.

My LAST name SHOULD be much the same BUT, as a kid, they mispronounced it tying it to a material that, if it didn't exist, a LOT of stuff would change for the worse. So NO PROBLEM! BUT, they tied that to something made out of it that, AGAIN, is not bad. So NO problem. But I guess the spirit and intent got to me as a taunt.

It used to be that only my family, and people that knew them got it right. NOW, it seems like MANY get it right. I guess it helps that I have so much family in the midwest, and that some of my family owns various businesses.

BTW without the first name at least, how do you personalize Emails? What if you have a billing problem?

Steve