Women breastfeeding in public

I think women should be able to feed their babies wherever they want to. However, common courtesy is to cover up with a blanket, or go in a private area. I completely understand people not wanting to see it in full view.

As for filling up bottles, there is sometimes nipple confusion and some mothers do not use pumps and bottles (this can cause a lot of problems with breastfeeding, and the baby's latch). I did not use bottles, and don't believe that's the solution for mothers who breastfeed

Just grab a blanket, and most people won't even look at you. And if they do, oh well.

I may have picked up the intonation wrongly in that remark, but really...If she just HAS to breastfeed?! She's not doing it just to be awkward. She's doing it because her baby is hungry and needs fed. And why should a baby fed as nature intended have to suddenly take it out of a bottle? "Breaking out a pump at home" isn't quite as easy as filling a bottle from a tap or faucet as you seem to think it is. It's damn hard to even get out of the house with a baby and paraphernalia as it is, without spending half the morning attempting to use a breast pump first. Assuming you get a minute to use it.

Of course, as Jenn pointed out, it is polite to cover up a little if you're breastfeeding as we live in a society that frowns upon flashing certain parts of ourself. And some people are uncomfortable seeing it (although they seem to have little trouble ogling women in low-cut tops). But come on! Breastfeeding is a natural act. To be blunt, it's what women have boobs for. When are we going to start acknowledging that it's natural and stop treating feeding mothers as pariahs?

Sorry about the rant!

Lynn

I have to agree with Jenn. I too never used a bottle and did breastfeed wherever I was. I was also respectful of others and covered up. Some people don't mind seeing and some people do. Be polite and cover up. There are a lot of things that are natural but we don't do them in front of people. Discreet comes to mind.

No offense Micheal, but I think you are WAY off the mark with your comments.

First you say "I think that if a woman just HAS to breastfeed, she can break out a pump at home, fill up a couple bottles and bring them with her."

You come across as saying "it's her fault for making a poor choice" AND you make it sound like pumping breast milk is as easy as pumping gas. I know you didn't mean it that way, but it seemed to have that tone.

Then you say in defense of those comments, "Mothers dont HAVE to breast feed, its a choice." I disagree. Breastfeeding is natural, NOT doing it is a choice. However, my wife tried and just couldn't do it. So I am grateful that other options exist.

As far as not wanting to see "that" while you eat...You have no business looking in the first place.

I agree that being discreet is polite, but not covering up shouldn't be grounds for getting kicked out of anywhere.

All the best,
Michael

p.s. My apologies to all of the ladies here. I am only speaking from a male perspective and know that I can;t understand the issue fully - just sharing my take on it.

Dinner envy?

Chick-fil-a is so religious they close on Sundays. To them a breast is the devil's work.

Then again 8 is a little too old. I mean will that girl being breast feeding at 12? 14? Even at 8 it is socially unacceptable. I was a horny little boy at 8, I don't think food was on my mind when I looked at breasts in playboy.

There is NO reason to do it out in the open uncovered. Frankly, Some just AREN'T that attractive, so if they think they want to get some attention from men, they are probably misleading themselves. And kids are kept somewhat naive, etc... and you want THEM to behave in society, so the "nursing" mothers should respect that.

As for chick-fil-a? It is THEIR right and they are a business, which means they should respect the majority of their CUSTOMERS wishes. Hey, HOOTERS loses some business because they do that, but that is their gimic, and it GETS them some business. They ALSO probably don't hire just ANYONE.

So it is just WRONG, pure and simple. Magazines that show breasts are often hidden and otherwise WRAPPED. Movies that show such things are only starting to be on public broadcasts and THEN often at night. It has been a part of the culture for DECADES.

If they want to breastfeed, it should be DISCRETE! And some workplaces and the like even have NURSING ROOMS where they can do it uncovered and maybe even without ANY top, if they want.

It is ironic that they claim to be mothers and want to be holier than though about it, but don't respect OTHER mother's wishes and want to change society in some way.

While I am at it, the SAME goes for changing the child. Isn't it ENOUGH when the child sometimes broadcasts it for everyone to know?

And NO, I am not one that runs around screaming, complains, etc... HECK, I am a straight male, and appreciate that as any other straight male does. But MOST people I have seen do this ARE discrete or DO use nursing rooms. And HEY, you don't want to see naked kids running around either. You really have to wonder about people that want to protest for it. It is like OK, let's just unwrap the playboys, and have LOTS of pictures of breasts showing from whereever. Would they like THAT!? They probably look better than some of the protesters anyway!

Steve

I would not agree.. Babies are too sensitive with bacterias.. I think breastfeeding in public is not sanitary.. It's not that a lot of people can see what you bare your breasts but the thing is it would be better to choose where you breastfeed.. If you do it in public, make sure you have something to cover your breasts for sanitary purposes..

I really don't see the issue with it. It's a natural thing that needs to happen if breast feeding a baby. Most women are discreet anyway.
However I remember there was a huge local story after a person complained about a women breastfeeding on a city bench. Not only did this person complain but they called the police. The police officer took her to the station and wanted to charge her with indecent exposure. The station sergeant told the officer he'd made a mistake and to release the women.
Was all rather stupid!

Rich

I was a nursing mother with four kids. I always covered up, or breast fed in private situations ( ie: couch in women's bathroom ). IMHO people who are uncomfortable with a woman feeding her child naturally are hung up about their own sexuality or are stuck in the mindset that "poor" women breast feed their babies, and that it's a sign of poverty, ignorance, 3rd world. What's so funny, is that many times, I find that those same people who are uncomfortable with breast feeding are ok with porn. Like Sal said, there are cultural taboos which are deeply rooted into the history of the US.

Personally, if the baby's hungry--feed the child!

Dorothy

I realize that sometimes its necessary for women to breastfeed in public, I just think people get hung up on having kids see women breast feeding in public.

Breastfeeding mothers / Men urinating in public places?

Somebodies going to have to draw me a picture showing the relation here.

I don't care if a woman wants to breastfeed their child in public - have at it. I have seen it dozens of times and had no problem not looking at it. It wasn't even shocking to me.

Are we 12 here were we giggle at the site of a breast? I think I stopped doing that around the same time I stopped giggling at terms like "titmouse".

I have no problems or hang up with it, I have no problems with kids seeing it, I have no problems with it at all.

I have no problems with it... Tending to a baby doesn't always go as planned. Mom's can breast feed them or change them in front of me anyplace and anytime and it wouldn't bother me a bit. Dad's can too (changing!).

I have a 3 year old... sometimes we have to pull over to the side of the road and take him behind a tree to take a leak... sometimes people see us... that's life.

Actually that's a pretty good point, Dot. It wasn't too long ago that the upper crust women didn't breast feed - in fact many of them didn't do much mothering at all. While things are changing toward a more natural attitude about the health of breastfeeding, anyone who still has the lingering attitude that breastfeeding is a necessity of the poor is going to find disgust with the practice. Especially in today's society in which people are often measured by the amount of status symbols they flash.

I also think breastfeeding makes people cringe is because it puts us on an even keel with animals. It is offensive to some to be seen as just another mammal feeding its young the way nature intended.

Oh well if it's in the movies and on TV, then I have no choice but to change my mind on the entire issue.



~Michael

I am kind of surprised that in 2009 people get this worked up over a boob.

Time to grow up.

You can't please everyone. Different people find different things offensive (or I think a more appropriate way to put it is "grossed out").

You might be grossed out by my feeding my child at the next table, but I guarantee you that I'm grossed out by the food that you're eating too (assuming that it's meat). I've been a vegetarian my whole life and can't stand to watch people eat meat. I think it's completely disgusting.

My brother doesn't mind seeing someone breastfeeding, but he got very worked up when he saw one of the America's Next Top Model judges come through his line at Whole Foods wearing sandals and having "snaggle toes". Should that guy not be allowed to wear sandals because my brother finds his toes offensive?

Love,
Shannon

That particular Chic-Fil_A is just a couple of miles from my house. On top
of all the furor they caused, the food is lousy too.

Tom

breast-feeding moms stage nurse-in a Chick-fil-A -- South Florida Sun-Sentinel.com

From the article:
"Still, Michelle LeRiche of Oviedo said the nurse-in was an important way to raise awareness - "to let other moms know, you have a right to feed your baby wherever and whenever they need to be fed."

Uh, no, you don't.
The manager made a mistake when she apologized.
The article says she asked the mother to use a towel AFTER she had received complaints from other patrons.
Her desire to plop a boob out so her child can suckle in public is NOT a right.

If a mother wants to breast feed,I'm all for it,but it is not nor should it be a public affair.
Edit: Rethinking the quote, I might tend to agree with it, what I don't agree with is they d0on't have the right to use breastfeeding as the method of feeding whenever and wherever they want.

Michael O. said:"BUT the real issue is whether or not it should be "wherever and whenever and HOWEVER".

Which is the point I also was trying to make.

Michael M said:"yes, but nobody says you have the right to breastfeed anywhere you want."

Which is also the point I was making.

The article stated,as Michael O points out:"State law allows public breast-feeding, regardless of how much of a woman's breast is exposed."

No, you can't, but you can tell them to stop ogling women and getting their kicks in the hopes of seeing a little female skin while the woman is breastfeeding.

I'm saying that women should have that right. Theaters, churches, school, restaurants, etc.

She was being discrete.

Whether you want to concede the point or not, men shouldn't be checking out other women. No, you can't tell them where they can't look.

But if we are ultimately talking about manners...

Breastfeeding isn't bad manners. Staring at women's breasts is.

Out of curiosity, (not aimed at anybody in particular) why is there so much anger directed toward breastfeeding?

I'm astounded that certain people haven't mentioned the inferiority of formula - after all, isn't that made by the "evil" corporations?

All the best,
Michael

Michael O, In this case I think you have it all wrong.
It is not "normal" to sit and look straight ahead while eating. Nor is it normal to sit and gaze at the person you are dining with. It is natural behavior to look around. The fact that I am doing so does not indicate that I am trying to ogle women or am hoping to see some female skin.
Having meals together is a social event. Breastfeeding is not.
Breastfeeding IN PUBLIC is bad manners. At least it sure looks to me a large portion of us think so.
As to anger at breastfeeding? I don't see that either.
I'm not angry about someone breastfeeding their child. And posting that I don't think it is proper doesn't make me angry.
And the fact that a couple of MEN complained indicates that they were not trying to ogle some female skin.
A lot of the time it seems your posts are on target, but as I said, this tme you are way off base.

Michael M, they keep trying to say the mother was being discrete, but I doubt that's the case.

Breast feeding in public is not bad manners.

Is it better to see them change the baby's diapers
on top of the coffetable in public...?
And you sitting next to it and the smell...?

Luckily, I have NOT had the pleasure,
but I know of some people what did.

Taking a ****'s natural too, but I don't wanna watch that either.

I don't care if a woman breastfeeds in public, but it's courtesy to cover up.

I'm going to be completely honest here and say that seeing someone expose their boob in public is very embarrassing for me. For some men, including myself, a boob is a very sexual item. Men are naturally visual creatures. We are aroused by site. And when you grow up in a society where a boob is almost always covered up - unless you're getting ready for sexual relations, then seeing an uncovered boob is naturally an arousal.

Therefore if I'm sitting in a restaurant with my wife, and a boob pops out any where near me, then I'll honestly say that I become embarrassed.

Why is it ok for her to embarrass the men around her, but then she can't take a little embarrassment herself when asked to cover up?

Just because you don't think that people should be embarrassed by it, doesn't mean that there aren't people out there like myself that are genuinely embarrassed by it. I know, you can tell people like me to get over it. And people like me can say please keep it covered.

Besides - if women actually knew what many men were thinking when they see an exposed breast, we probably wouldn't be having this discussion.

We'll probably have to just agree to disagree on this one Tim.

By the way, I saw that you have your article directory up for sale. I remember your directory being one of the more popular ones out there. I wish I had the money to buy it for what you're asking for it. I may still try to scrounge up enough for it.

"By all accounts she was being discreet BTW"
No, she was not being discreet by all accounts.
And when she was asked to use a little discretion as a courtesy to others, she refused.
As Kay posted earlier in this thread, this is more about the current (false) attitude that someone has the right to do what they want when they want and everyone else be damned. I quote:
"The entire issue is about a young woman who flopped her boob out in public and grew angry when asked in a polite and reasonable way to cover up a bit. She wasn't asked to stop feeding or to move nor was she treated rudely. Just another member of the "it's all about me" generation."
Most of the posters seemed to have missed the real issue.
I am actually surprised that this has gotten so much attention and this story so little.Burger King Kicks Out Baby for Not Wearing Shoes - Associated Content

Tim, usually I agree with you but not in this case.
As far as the manager making a mistake, nonsense, thats coming from Chic Filet doing some quick fire putting outing. PR is everything.
Head Honchos say we got to nip this in the bud so they have the manager apologize.
As pointed out, the mother may have said she was discreet, but the fact alone that people complained proves she wasn't discreet.Funny, I saw the mother do an interview on a Fox station and she wasn't being discreet at all,though the Fox channel was, it kept a bar covering her up the whole interview.
As far as they law saying she can expose as much as she wants, well then it's time to readjust the laws into more sensible ones.
I wasn't there, you weren't there so neither of us actually know if she was discreet,but once again, the fact that she got complaints would indicate she wasn't as discreet as both you and her claim.

For the people who have such a strong aversion to public breast feeding..even with a nursing bra which is discrete by nature.

Why are you looking? Like that is what confuses me.

No matter where in public you are there are an infinite amount of places to look besides the nursing mother.

If you can't simply ignore that, or are embarrassed or grossed out by that - I think that is something you need to work on IMO.

Thankfully the laws regarding this issue seem to becoming more liberal, so hopefully in a generation or two - the stigma and possible ignorance(not saying people here are, just in general) over this issue will have died out and people will be laughing that it was ever an issue.

Having you post a Fox video FOR your side is actually quite ironic.
Discrete is subjective. What I feel discrete is and what you feel discrete is and what she feels discrete is and what the original complainers feel discrete is obviously do not coincide.
Its funny how she won't even answer the interviewers direct question that this should be done"with discretion".
As far as this interview goes, watch the moving name bar. Nuff said.

Gary - There are many people out there that are embarrassed when they see breastfeeding in public - for a lot of different reasons. The last living generation that lived thinking it was risque for a woman to show her ankles in public has just expired.
In America, people have been socialized very strangely. It is understandable that a
parent's victorian attitude will be drilled or be beaten into them. Men in this country
are absolutely berserk over breasts.

I have always been small chested and actually thought that was a deformity and was
much upset by it in my last year of high school, by which time it was apparent that I was smaller than many women and I was often made to feel inferior because of it - by both men and women. THen I moved to Europe. It was the first time in my life I was exposed to the attitude that you didn't have to sport udders to be sexy. The men looked at the whole body and not just the "rack". By the time I got back to America I felt awesome about myself - and while my confidence allowed me to see there are a lot of leg and ab guys out there, there are still jerks who will make completely and outrageously rude comments to me. Where would my confidence be if I'd never been elsewhere that comments like "you'd have a perfect body if you had bigger tits" were as frowned on by other males as they were by women? How superior of a male to feel that he has the right to destroy someone like that just because he has other preferences? But it happens all the time in this country.

My point in all of this? Somewhere Americans got a very sick point of view of the female body. Perhaps it's a hangover from the attitude that used to be so prevelant that women are on earth for man's pleasure and are merely a convenience for them. Maybe it's because many are taught that sex is evil and breasts are a very potent symbol of sex - yet men are completely dependent on them at some point of their lives. Maybe the embarrassment is a residual of that somehow. There are a lot of reasons we got so sick over this part of the body.

But this isn't 1850 any more, when it was frowned upon for women to even be in public when they were pregnant - and it's not 1950 anymore when men thought of women as a subclass breed of men rather than an opposite gender of the same species. We can be expected to never be comfortable watching something so aesthetically displeasing as someone moving their bowels or tossing their cookies.
But the feeding of a child can't be compared to watching refuse pouring out of someone's body.

Once breastfeeding becomes more prevalent in society, the discomforts such as you feel will also disappear. When that happens there won't be much spectacular left in seeing a boob flopped out to a baby. That boob won't have the same impact as the ones being shaken in your face from the stage of a strip club.

I am hoping that many more women decide to breast feed in public. Yes, they should be descreet as it is a new thing over here in our sexually anal little society, but eventually will become so normal that nobody will have any odd feelings when it happens even when there is no descretion attempted. I think about the time that we can see a baby being fed and not really take extra notice of it that many other of our ideas about sex and women will normalize as well - for both men and women.

I love the fact that I'm fascinated by a breast. (And by the way Sal, it doesn't matter to me if it's small or big - I like them all)

But the fact still remains that we live in a society where the breast is covered up 99.9% of the time when in public.

Here's one for you to think about - What if over night a world-wide genetic mutation happened, and nutrients for a baby could only come from a male's testicle. Wouldn't you be at least slightly embarrassed to see a man whip it out at the table next to you? Be honest.

All I'm saying is that it's not unnatural in the least to be embarrassed by an exposed breast, when you're so used to them being covered up. That's not my fault, that's the culture I live in. If women were to go around all day without a shirt or bra on, then I'd be used to it. But that's not the way it happens in this society. If you want to make the argument that women should be topless all of the time, that's fine, I'll be the first to jump on that bandwagon. However until that time comes, you can't expect to expose yourself without embarrassing someone.

I cannot help but think that the child will end up confused and with issues. I have never heard of any scientific studies on the subject though.
I suspect that breast feeding older children is more for the mother, and not for the child. And my gut says that, at least in our culture, it could be harmful to the child.

Which would you prefer: a screaming baby or a breastfeeding mother?

I was always discrete and tried to sit in as private a spot as possible, but babies need to be fed often -one of mine needed to be fed every 2 hours for a while. It is impossible to always be at home when the moment arrives. I would always go to the car if the weather made it comfortable.

Bathrooms are nasty. I wouldn't want to eat in one, so I would never feed my kid there either.

Women Looks stupid while i saw them few times breastfeeding in public. They should carry bottle while traveling outside with there children.

I think it is a right for a mom to breastfeed her baby in public. But she should do so discreetly. If someone is bothered by it, they can always turn their head the other way.

My personal point of view, is if it offends you can always walk away

I think a breastfeeding mother should be able to nurse in public without fear of prosecution. After all , that baby does not care where the hell we are at the time, only that its hungry. Now i cant give the mother in question any brownie points for not covering herself up, but all they had to say was " um, could you please cover that up" They didnt need to kick her out. And anyway, its a normal thing, theres nothing gross or discusting about it. Its what we do to nurture our children, the natural way. And i guess if you have a problem with that, then go suck your own dick.

do animals feed their babies where humans walk? .. YES!!!
do humans mind if they see momma animal feed her baby(ies)? ... NO!!

so why is there an issue of a mother feeding her baby? ... tis natural folks, accept it n if it is repulsive, DON'T LOOK :-D

For those that say "its a choice", no, not always. I tried to suppliment my baby and we ended up in the er after she aspirated her hypoallergenic formula. Formula made her very very sick. I had to be on a very special diet. I couldnt pump either. It just didnt work.