Please help with disruptive 7 year old boy.

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Sorry this is not a cute Tbird "my son age 5" story.

One of my housekeepers has to bring her son to work sometimes.

He is 7 and full of energy.

But he keeps doing things that he has been asked not to do.
Grabs things, jumps on furniture, jumps on people, breathes in
your drink cup while seeing what you are drinking, plays with
stuff he should not...

I have to keep him out of the lobby so he won't interrupt while
I'm conducting business.

More than the normal 7 year old, he is fixed on doing what he wants
to do.

I think that there is an element of him knowing he is not supposed to
whatever it is, but doing it anyway. I do believe that he also does actually
forget sometimes.

I would not be surprised if he gets a diagnosis of ADD or ADHD.

And, he does not seem to care about others. Sometimes he does
show that he cares - occasions with his siblings, handwritten love cards to Mom.

The family did have a rough year last year and had to move to get work, which
took him away from cousins and friends...

Mom reports he used to be happy and better behaved.


Anyway, I'd greatly appreciate your suggestions/experiences.
  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    The family did have a rough year last year and had to move to get work, which
    took him away from cousins and friends...
    Two things - even when unavoidable that can cause stress and affect a child's behavior. When a family is focused on survival, children may not get the attention/discipline/training they need at a young age.

    But he keeps doing things that he has been asked not to do.
    Grabs things, jumps on furniture, jumps on people, breathes in
    your drink cup while seeing what you are drinking, plays with
    stuff he should not...

    I have to keep him out of the lobby so he won't interrupt while
    I'm conducting business.
    I'm not sure you can judge his behavior in that setting as going to work with Mom is boring for a 7 yr old. It's a place where there a lot of stuff he CAN'T do and not much TO do.

    More than the normal 7 year old, he is fixed on doing what he wants
    to do.

    I think that there is an element of him knowing he is not supposed to
    whatever it is, but doing it anyway. I do believe that he also does actually
    forget sometimes.
    Or perhaps there are no consequences. For a child that age, negative attention is still attention...and at age 7, attention is important.

    People will jump in with diagnoses - but his "better behavior" may have been when he was much younger. If it were me, I'd help the worker find an alternative and discourage her from bringing him to work. It puts his mother in a bad position trying to explain away his disruptive behavior and that doesn't make it better.
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  • Profile picture of the author Bengr86
    Have you considered a leash and tying the boy to a desk drawer or something? Maybe some educational beatings? (I'm kidding on both counts, yes?)

    I don't have kids of my own, but I've got 14 nieces and nephews, the oldest about to turn 10. When they decide that it's time to release all their pent up energy and become annoying, the tactic I use with fair amounts of success is to play with them a bit, tire them out, and then tell them that it's time for me to take a break, because I have things to do. If they can remain calm and relaxed for 10-15 minutes, I'll play with them for another few minutes. By giving them their fix but forcing them to "earn it", we both get what we want, I get the quiet I need, and they get to have fun with their favorite (or so I assume) uncle.
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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
    A shot of Jack oughtta put him down for a "nap" for a bit, Biz.
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    • Profile picture of the author BigFrank
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      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      A shot of Jack oughtta put him down for a "nap" for a bit, Biz.
      I was thinkin' paregoric as you can give that to a child without risking jail time.

      Cheers. - Frank
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by BigFrank View Post

        I was thinkin' paregoric as you can give that to a child without risking jail time.

        Cheers. - Frank
        Well, in that case, Biz could notice that the kid's "allergies" are flaring up and dose him with Benadryl.
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        • Profile picture of the author BigFrank
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          Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

          Well, in that case, Biz could notice that the kid's "allergies" are flaring up and dose him with Benadryl.
          A perfectly logical solution.

          Cheers. - Frank
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      A shot of Jack oughtta put him down for a "nap" for a bit, Biz.
      Gee, that is a bit extreme, a padded cell, and box of crayons, would be enough?

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      • Profile picture of the author Jill Carpenter
        Ask the question to your housekeeper - what is more important - your child or your job?

        Someone needs to lay down the law.
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    • Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      A shot of Jack oughtta put him down for a "nap" for a bit, Biz.
      It is cool to see how parenthood is mellowin' you out, Dan.

      So, hey, I am no expert here but I figure you gotta buncha factors loadin' up the disruption that are prolly not gonna go away any time soon.

      So i figure you gotta take an aikido kinda approach an' channel it somehow.

      For sure, makin' the kid feel useful gonna help, especially if he can burn off energy.

      Mebbe confined spaces an' sittin' around are not the best solutions.

      You got any boisterous dogs or lady wrestlers?

      Sumthin' active an' productive?
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    • Profile picture of the author Jason Kanigan
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      A shot of Jack oughtta put him down for a "nap" for a bit, Biz.
      Yeah, Bizgrower has a hotel so put the kid in room 237; that'll sort him out.

      Bizzy...I think you're gonna have to be "the bad guy" and institute a policy here.
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by Jason Kanigan View Post

        Yeah, Bizgrower has a hotel so put the kid in room 237; that'll sort him out.


        I see what you did there.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kurt
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      A shot of Jack oughtta put him down for a "nap" for a bit, Biz.

      I can't believe anyone would actually suggest giving a kid alcohol! This is Colorado. I suggest a bag of Doritos and a couple of puffs of some top shelf indica.
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

        I can't believe anyone would actually suggest giving a kid alcohol! This is Colorado. I suggest a bag of Doritos and a couple of puffs of some top shelf indica.
        Family legend has it that that's precisely how my brothers handled me when they had to babysit.

        My mother always thinks they're joking...
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        • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
          Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

          Family legend has it that that's precisely how my brothers handled me when they had to babysit.

          My mother always thinks they're joking...
          True story:

          When I was 13, my 20 year old brother and 17 year old sister dropped acid while we were
          on a back-packing trip. They scared the snot out of me, especially when they said they
          could see halos around me while I was standing in the sunlight.
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          • Profile picture of the author Jill Carpenter
            Originally Posted by David Beroff View Post

            Note 4: For those outside the US who are scratching their heads, Roswell has a reputation/folklore [/URL].
            This is not folklore. I saw it happen and it was real.

            I see some nice things going on here.

            I can tell I grew up in a different time with much stricter parents.

            My mom would have told me to sit my ass down and be quiet (well before I was 7) and behave and not make a sound or the belt would be coming out.

            That would have been that.
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            • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
              Originally Posted by Jill Carpenter View Post

              My mom would have told me to sit my ass down and be quiet (well before I was 7) and behave and not make a sound or the belt would be coming out.
              Originally Posted by Jill Carpenter View Post

              This is not folklore. I saw it happen and it was real.
              Correlation?
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  • Profile picture of the author Synnuh
    DVD player, smartphone, iPod, coloring books, or just give him old electronics and some hand tools, tell him to destroy at will.

    Or tell her to find another solution. Or find another housekeeper.

    Have you let her know about how his behavior irritates you, and that you pay her bills?

    May sound like you're being a d*ck but, after all, you're running a business, and it's not bring your kid to work day.

    If there's no other solution, maybe do like Bengr86 said, and entertain the young pup. Get him involved in something he finds fascinating, learning on YouTube, or something you can both do together until she finishes up her work.

    When my daughter starts getting demanding, I'll put YouTube on. There's videos she watches that are cartoonish, but teach her all kinds if "Did ya know?" facts. Pretty entertaining.

    Or just beat him. Put the fear into his heart lol, then all you have to do is give him the look. /sarcasm
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    • Profile picture of the author Mike Anthony
      Sounds like the kid is bored out of his mind and could do with a room to keep him occupied. TV or his favorite kind of toys. Mom would have to cue you in on what those things are

      NIX to the idea that you are going to wear out a seven year old with a few minutes romp. Those suggesting that obviously never had children or children play dates. A seven year old can run circles around you for a long tme. You also could consider reassigning her to checkouts (this is a hotel right?) which will be empty rooms and she can have him with her. She can tell him he can earn treats for helping out.


      Originally Posted by Synnuh View Post

      Have you let her know about how his behavior irritates you, and that you pay her bills?

      May sound like you're being a d*ck but, after all, you're running a business, and it's not bring your kid to work day.
      That would not be sounding like one that would be being one.
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  • Profile picture of the author Dennis Gaskill
    Sounds like a combination of him being bored because there's little to do and him probably needing some attention. Without giving this a lot of thought, it seems like you have two choices:

    1) Give him some attention before he acts up to get the attention he needs, and that way it can be positive attention instead of correctional in nature; and give him some things to do. Here you're kind of acting like a big brother or mentor.

    2) Tell your worker she'll have to find someone to care for him while she works because you can't have him disrupting business.

    The first option, if you have the time and desire for it, would be better for the boy. That actually sounds more like you, too (what I know of you from your posts here).
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  • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
    Surely there must be some work that he can do, and even earn some minimal pay for doing so. It'll keep him busy, and genuinely engaged in contributing. I'm not talking harsh child labor; I'm suggesting some age-appropriate task that he can do, and that you need done anyway. A seven year old child is certainly capable of contributing, and you may even find that there are some positive aspects to the relationship, beyond keeping him out of the way.
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  • Profile picture of the author ra42
    teach him how to code, he will be busy all the time in front of the computer.
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  • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
    Thank you all for the input so far.

    He can keep playing all day - just one of those type of kids.
    As Mike Anthony pointed out. Computer, TV... only keeps him
    occupied for so long. A couple of hours -not minutes - of play might
    wear him down for a little while.

    I'm in a rural area, so good help is hard to find and Mom's a trooper.
    For example, she still came in after only getting two hours of sleep
    because one of her other kids had been to the emergency room for
    bad stomach issues. I told her we could get by without her. Another
    time I had to make her go home because she was throwing up - she
    was still willing to help.

    Bringing kids to work is a perk I've always allowed to keep good help.
    Babysitters around here are dicey/flaky and I don't want to be even a
    tiny bit responsible for something bad happening to an employee's kid.

    Also, baby sitters/childcare cost way more than earnings. Three childcare
    facilities around here and two are only during weekday school hours.
    All are expensive.

    I'm going to work on the positive attention aspects and restrict him from the
    office lobby area, unless he is with Mom - basically as she is coming and
    leaving from work.

    The philosopher known as Kay might be right about judging his behavior
    based on the little bit I see here. Mom reported that he does do well at
    school with the structure and teachers being able to supervise him. Hotel
    work is hands on so it's hard to manage him as a teacher can.

    Dan
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  • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
    Thinking some more about my earlier post, I realized that the second paragraph of a review I wrote recently fits in rather well with that spirit. This was for a very alien-themed AirBnB home in Roswell, NM, so the review was written to align with the host's market positioning:

    CLEAN and Welcoming and a lot of FUN!! This listing is 100% accurate; everything was exactly as expected. Six of us adults were able to sleep comfortably in this property's two rooms. Timothy was great with all communication in advance, and was there to greet all of us when we arrived. Not only did he offer us the famous Alien Beer as we settled in, but he went absolutely above and beyond any POSSIBLE expectations by making dinner for all of us. There was a similar level of care and consideration given to the bedrooms and bathroom, as well as to the rest of the roomy house.

    Actually, I want to... probe a bit on all of that behind-the-scenes work for a moment. As we all know, there's a ton of cleaning and preparation needed so as to ensure such a GREAT guest experience, and that "hidden" advance effort usually occurs in total silence. {Cue the spooky music.} Was it... ALIENS? Well, in THIS case... no. I was personally impressed as to how Timothy uses AirBnB as a living laboratory to teach his teenage son how important all of the nitty-gritty details are to running a very successful small business. Johnathon actively participates in an age-appropriate amount of the work AND the corresponding income, and it's obvious that he's learning some great real-world life lessons from AirBnB.

    If YOU ever find yourself needing to crash into Roswell from some other world, make sure you aim YOUR vehicle toward Timothy's driveway!! You will NOT be disappointed by the ambiance and sheer VALUE of his comfortable landing pad!
    Note 1: Sorry for the all-caps; their system does not accept italics for emphasis.

    Note 2: That is not an affiliate link!

    Note 3: Yes, this particular kid is older than seven. But still, it's the same general idea.

    Note 4: For those outside the US who are scratching their heads, Roswell has a reputation/folklore for being a place where aliens from outer space supposedly crash-landed in 1947.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      He can keep playing all day - just one of those type of kids.
      So....typical little boy.

      The "philosopher known as Kay" - raised two lively sons. I KNOW what a trial a little boy can be when he is bored. Often the child who is a bit hyper and restless...is the smartest kid around.

      Is it possible to establish a small day care on or near the premises - where employees pay a minimal child care amt and the business subsidizes it as a benefit?

      Are there schools nearby that might have education students interested in part-time work with kids?

      It's good you are flexible with employees and obviously you can't provide care for babies or toddlers and don't want to be full time day care either. There might be a midway there to hire part time child care workers, though.

      I don't know where you are located but is the "kid at work" due to school days off?
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  • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
    Some good ideas there Kay.

    Sometimes it's school days. Most times it's weekends when both parents have to work.
    Drawbacks to being in tourist related businesses.

    The energy might be typical boy. The inconsiderate aspects of his personality do not seem
    typical.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      Prior to Hurricane Katrina the two 400 room hotels associated with the casino where I worked had a very popular child care center for guests of the hotel.

      It was safe and full of toys and books and trained young workers playing with the kids....our hotel guests loved it because they trusted the safety policies ....and, when needed, workers could use it, too, for a reduced fee.

      Because there WAS a fee workers only used "KidQuest" when absolutely necessary - but our hotel guests LOVED the idea. It was a busy place.

      Grabs things, jumps on furniture, jumps on people, breathes in
      your drink cup while seeing what you are drinking, plays with
      stuff he should not...
      That kid would get on my nerves....
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      • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
        Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

        Prior to Hurricane Katrina the two 400 room hotels associated with the casino where I worked had a very popular child care center for guests of the hotel.... It was a busy place.
        So, after the hurricane, did you have to auction off the remaining children? Or did FEMA take care of that for you?
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        • Profile picture of the author Kay King
          The building was on the water - so was gone - no leftover children at all.
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  • Profile picture of the author yukon
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    You're an employer, not your problem. Tell her don't bring the kid to work. Done.
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    • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
      Originally Posted by yukon View Post

      You're an employer, not your problem. Tell her don't bring the kid to work. Done.
      Not my style and the kid is not a big enough problem to cause me to run short handed and/or run with
      employees who are not as good as she.

      Almost all of the employees I've ever had would not have made it to work the times she has.
      Most would not make it to work if they went through a lot less than she has.

      Huge factor for the hotel is to have honest employees I'm comfortable having around guests
      and their belongings and kiddows.
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      • Profile picture of the author yukon
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        Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

        Not my style and the kid is not a big enough problem to cause me to run short handed and/or run with
        employees who are not as good as she.

        Almost all of the employees I've ever had would not have made it to work the times she has.
        Most would not make it to work if they went through a lot less than she has.

        Huge factor for the hotel is to have honest employees I'm comfortable having around guests
        and their belongings and kiddows.


        So why are you complaining in the OP If you're not going to do anything?
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        • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
          Originally Posted by yukon View Post

          So why are you complaining in the OP If you're not going to do anything?
          I asked for input and got some good stuff that I appreciate because it balances my reaction to the
          situation. Going to make small moves as outlined in a post above, as opposed to big moves such as
          telling her he can't come. Going to talk or work on some things with her, and remain silent on some things forever, or until I know more. More nuances than I covered here because I don't know enough, such as diet, food allergies, does he have ADD or ADHD, are there Daddy issues....
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          • Profile picture of the author yukon
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            Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

            I asked for input and got some good stuff that I appreciate because it balances my reaction to the
            situation. Going to make small moves as outlined in a post above, as opposed to big moves such as
            telling her he can't come. Going to talk or work on some things with her, and remain silent on some things forever, or until I know more. More nuances than I covered here because I don't know enough, such as diet, food allergies, does he have ADD or ADHD, are there Daddy issues....


            Ok, so you want to be Dr. Phil for a kid that shouldn't even be in a business environment.

            The problem isn't the kid, the problem is you're allowing the kid to be in the wrong environment.
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          • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
            Originally Posted by yukon View Post

            So why are you complaining in the OP If you're not going to do anything?
            I didn't see it as a complaint; I saw it as a request for suggestions.

            Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

            More nuances than I covered here because I don't know enough, such as diet, food allergies, does he have ADD or ADHD, are there Daddy issues....
            I've tried to avoid mention of ADD/ADHD here because it can be such a hot button. I'll just say this: We add sugar and caffeine and tons of chemicals into our food, plus remove all forms of natural exercise from our lives, and then expect young children to remain quiet and still for hours on end. When they don't, many of us turn to drugs, (prescribed or otherwise), to "fix" the problem.

            I was an absolute terror as a boy. Many severe problems. Medicine only succeeded into turning me into a zombie; not really a great solution. Changes in diet did help in addressing most, but not all, of the problems.

            In hindsight, as an adult looking back at myself as a child, I can see that exercise was never even mentioned as a solution, and yet, I currently feel that it would have been a significant help. Children (and adults) need activity in their lives, and there are many socially-acceptable ways of achieving this. When people are not active, problems occur. Often for children, they seek ways to address their own inactivity, even if they aren't yet mature enough to figure out acceptable solutions on their own. That's why I posted what I did above.
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            • Profile picture of the author yukon
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              Originally Posted by David Beroff View Post

              I didn't see it as a complaint; I saw it as a request for suggestions.

              Read the OP, jumping on furniture/people & disrupting business is a complaint.

              Seriously, why is this complicated?

              Kids will be kids, they're active, they need somewhere to run & be kids. Other than maybe a swimming pool a hotel has nothing to offer a kid.

              In order to remove the problems (jumping on furniture/people & disrupting business) OP needs to grow a pair & act like he's running a business. Put policies in place where employees don't bring family to work. Are you running a hotel or a daycare?
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              • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
                Originally Posted by yukon View Post

                Read the OP, jumping on furniture/people & disrupting business is a complaint.

                Seriously, why is this complicated?

                Kids will be kids, they're active, they need somewhere to run & be kids. Other than maybe a swimming pool a hotel has nothing to offer a kid.

                In order to remove the problems (jumping on furniture/people & disrupting business) OP needs to grow a pair & act like he's running a business. Put policies in place where employees don't bring family to work. Are you running a hotel or a daycare?
                Yukon,

                Have you run a hotel in my market, or anywhere?
                Do you know anybody who aspires to be a housekeeper or laundry person?
                A lot of people around here will get by on the assistance programs rather than work part-time.
                As I've explained, the labor pool here is weak and employees like her, even half as good,
                are few and far between.

                As for a policy, it's pretty simple: this kid is not going to be in the office lobby area anymore.
                He is going to be in the laundry room with her, or in a empty guest room nearby with TV,
                games, coloring books, and her laptop.

                Also, there is a fenced in area he can play. It's just 1 to 3 days per week.

                As for work that he can do, there are always windows to clean and what Mom lets
                him do in the laundry room.

                He's not mature enough for mentoring as yet. He does not yet get the concept of
                a customer and what they mean to his family.

                Overall, most customers think it's cool or nice that I allow employee's kiddows.

                The previous owner's had a housekeeper, with kids, who could clean half the rooms in a
                single day. And clean them well. She was here for 14 years and recently worked for me for
                another two years - until she moved to Oklahoma.

                Thanks again to everybody for all of the requested input and responses to my statements
                of fact about the situation.

                Dan
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                • Profile picture of the author Kay King
                  As for a policy, it's pretty simple: this kid is not going to be in the office lobby area anymore.
                  He is going to be in the laundry room with her, or in a empty guest room nearby with TV,
                  games, coloring books, and her laptop.

                  Also, there is a fenced in area he can play. It's just 1 to 3 days per week.
                  That should work - I think what you have to do is make the kid MOM'S problem. If she feels he's "OK" doing whatever he pleases, it easier for her to do her work and let him wander around. I applaud your willingness to be flexible on this but the simplest answer is with the mother.

                  She's a hard worker - you don't know the family dynamics but the simplest answer is that MOM needs to understand she is in charge of her son's behavior when she brings him to work. The continued ability to BRING him to work should depend on that.

                  Without big solutions like day care - the only option is to require the mother to keep her son with her while he's on your property. If there is an alternative room with games or TV, require his mother to leave him in that room or escort him from that room to keep him from wandering around.
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            • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
              Originally Posted by David Beroff View Post

              I didn't see it as a complaint; I saw it as a request for suggestions.



              I've tried to avoid mention of ADD/ADHD here because it can be such a hot button. I'll just say this: We add sugar and caffeine and tons of chemicals into our food, plus remove all forms of natural exercise from our lives, and then expect young children to remain quiet and still for hours on end. When they don't, many of us turn to drugs, (prescribed or otherwise), to "fix" the problem.

              I was an absolute terror as a boy. Many severe problems. Medicine only succeeded into turning me into a zombie; not really a great solution. Changes in diet did help in addressing most, but not all, of the problems.

              In hindsight, as an adult looking back at myself as a child, I can see that exercise was never even mentioned as a solution, and yet, I currently feel that it would have been a significant help. Children (and adults) need activity in their lives, and there are many socially-acceptable ways of achieving this. When people are not active, problems occur. Often for children, they seek ways to address their own inactivity, even if they aren't yet mature enough to figure out acceptable solutions on their own. That's why I posted what I did above.
              If there is ADD/ADHD... I agree and would like to see exercise, diet, and more cognitive approaches first. We have stopped his and his little brother's access to Orange Juice and Hot Chocolate.

              Any quick tips on diet changes that were effective? I've heard milk allergies can be a factor.


              Dan
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              • Profile picture of the author Jason Kanigan
                Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

                If there is ADD/ADHD... I agree and would like to see exercise, diet, and more cognitive approaches first. We have stopped his and his little brother's access to Orange Juice and Hot Chocolate.

                Any quick tips on diet changes that were effective? I've heard milk allergies can be a factor.


                Dan
                IDK why it didn't occur to me until now, but with my current main client it ought to have.

                Sit down with the mom, tell her how much you value her being there, tell her about the situation, and ask her to come up with a solution with you!

                Then you're not being the bad dictator who she covertly resents. You're creating the solution together.

                Even if she doesn't come up with anything, you still opened the door and it'll be agreement upon instead of imposition of a solution.
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                • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
                  Originally Posted by Jason Kanigan View Post

                  IDK why it didn't occur to me until now, but with my current main client it ought to have.

                  Sit down with the mom, tell her how much you value her being there, tell her about the situation, and ask her to come up with a solution with you!

                  Then you're not being the bad dictator who she covertly resents. You're creating the solution together.

                  Even if she doesn't come up with anything, you still opened the door and it'll be agreement upon instead of imposition of a solution.
                  Exactly how we're rolling.

                  Dan
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              • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
                Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

                Any quick tips on diet changes that were effective?
                There are people here who clearly know far more about nutrition than I do, but, as I mentioned, reduction/elimination of stimulants like sugar and caffeine certainly wouldn't hurt.
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  • Profile picture of the author seasoned
    The housekeeper should understand that he is a risk to YOU, and thereby to HER and her employment. He could make you sick, steal, destroy all sorts of things, etc... If need be, maybe you can explain to her and the kid that if he can't behave, and she has to bring him, that you have to let her go.

    I would NOT pay him, or teach him anything just because he is acting up. That would be reinforcement of the behavior.

    And imagine hw he will be as a teenager, etc...

    Steve
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    • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
      Originally Posted by seasoned View Post

      The housekeeper should understand that he is a risk to YOU, and thereby to HER and her employment. He could make you sick, steal, destroy all sorts of things, etc... If need be, maybe you can explain to her and the kid that if he can't behave, and she has to bring him, that you have to let her go.

      I would NOT pay him, or teach him anything just because he is acting up. That would be reinforcement of the behavior.

      And imagine hw he will be as a teenager, etc...

      Steve
      If he did get paid or mentored, it would be because he is doing positive things while eliminating the negative attention getting things. He's an immature 7 year old and needs adult leadership and
      structure before it's too late.
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  • Profile picture of the author DRP
    The kid needs a drill sergeant to straighten him out and teach him the fact that the world doesn't revolve around him. He's rude? Push-ups and running. He spits? Push-ups and running. The military has mastered corrective training and it works like a charm. The kid will also become healthier as a result, which isn't a bad thing.

    When I was young, I was spanked. When I was about a teenager I was subjected to that corrective training of PT as punishment. I grew up to be a well adjusted citizen as a result. I think more kids need that kind of discipline. There would be a lot less crybaby bullies, with entitled superiority complexes, if there was.
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Gee, Dan. If that town is anywhere what it was in the early 90's, you have a problem.

    If you fire her, there is likely to be some sort of local social retribution if she's lived there longer than you. That town kinda protects its own...........which is maybe why you are asking questions instead of just dumping her off in the first place?

    Sounds like the kid needs a daddy. Not sure how up you feel for being this kid's big brother - but if you keep him around, it's a role you are taking on.

    There used to be all sorts of women out there not otherwise employed that would take care of this kid while she works. Where'd they go -- or is money the problem? There should be social services for a low wage earner that will pay for his care while she's at work.

    Also - there's sure to be other women with that problem up there. Has anyone taken it to City Hall? Seems like a perfect opportunity for the town to develop an organization for kids - one that might be a little fun and educational. Look where you live - survival day camps would be awesome for these kids. Or somewhere they can develop personal interests such as arts and crafts, or read, write. That can be done as easily as opening a room or two in a school off hours for kids like this - and I'm assuming she's got him there off normal school hours.

    If you feel that you want to keep her on, and that means dealing with him - use that time to teach him the business. What happens when a kid is 12 and he's been taught things like customer service, inventory, clean-up, etc? Or maybe there are some other locals who might take him off your hands -- say someone needed to have a dog walked for a little while and a few dollars in the kid's pocket?

    That's a pretty close knit community - see if anyone can there can help the situation. I'm sure that some of those people can come up with a lot of ways to keep that kid occupied constructively, even if the hotel itself really can't.
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    • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

      Gee, Dan. If that town is anywhere what it was in the early 90's, you have a problem.

      If you fire her, there is likely to be some sort of local social retribution if she's lived there longer than you. That town kinda protects its own...........which is maybe why you are asking questions instead of just dumping her off in the first place?

      Sounds like the kid needs a daddy. Not sure how up you feel for being this kid's big brother - but if you keep him around, it's a role you are taking on.

      There used to be all sorts of women out there not otherwise employed that would take care of this kid while she works. Where'd they go -- or is money the problem? There should be social services for a low wage earner that will pay for his care while she's at work.

      Also - there's sure to be other women with that problem up there. Has anyone taken it to City Hall? Seems like a perfect opportunity for the town to develop an organization for kids - one that might be a little fun and educational. Look where you live - survival day camps would be awesome for these kids. Or somewhere they can develop personal interests such as arts and crafts, or read, write. That can be done as easily as opening a room or two in a school off hours for kids like this - and I'm assuming she's got him there off normal school hours.

      If you feel that you want to keep her on, and that means dealing with him - use that time to teach him the business. What happens when a kid is 12 and he's been taught things like customer service, inventory, clean-up, etc? Or maybe there are some other locals who might take him off your hands -- say someone needed to have a dog walked for a little while and a few dollars in the kid's pocket?

      That's a pretty close knit community - see if anyone can there can help the situation. I'm sure that some of those people can come up with a lot of ways to keep that kid occupied constructively, even if the hotel itself really can't.
      Day camps sound like a good idea, especially for weekends because most jobs are in the tourism business. Current day care facilities are only at the ski area and two schools so the day care facilities are only open when those places are open. Not cheap, even for their own employees. There was one private licensed day care facility that closed down last year.

      Kid's are here during non-school hours, so mostly she gets to drop them off at school and pick them up when finished here.

      No intention of letting her go. She's very valuable- best I've hired.

      The community is probably much more transient then when you were in the area. Higher level
      career jobs might get an outrage if someone was seemingly fired unfairly. My people are not all that well established or known around here.

      Thank you.

      Dan
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  • Profile picture of the author seasoned
    ANOTHER THING! 7 years old? He should be in like 2nd grade! If he is on school break, maybe he can go to SUMMER SCHOOL! Is the school day still like 8am-3:30pm?

    As for her being the best, etc... it doesn't hurt to let them know. Regardless of how good SHE is, HE can really spoil things.

    Steve
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