Entrepreneurship Can Be Very Lonely Sometimes

by Best Seller 14 replies
I need to vent tonight. Maybe someone on here will be able to relate, because I need to hear from someone who can relate to what I'm talking about. This entrepreneur thing can be very lonely sometimes.

The other night, I read this thread by Chris Munch: [WAMA] Chris Munch: Record for 100,000 Visitors To WF & 7 Figure Business - Here to Help You!. One of the things he wrote about that resonated most with me was, "I started a software company that was basically a free version of Netflix before YouTube even existed but couldnt get the funding I needed to grow, so it failed, even though I got 250,000 visits per month (all my businesses have been self funded)."

I've worked my ass off for the past seven years, trying to grow my own virtual publishing business on the side of other full-time jobs because I was unable to get any sort of traditional funding from angels or venture capitalists. Maybe my business plans weren't written well enough to communicate the true value of my business proposition to them? I don't know. So, for seven years, I've built it bit by bit on a part-time basis ... which has been exhausting, at times, considering my day jobs were always in corporate sales. Anyone who's ever been in corporate sales understands the grind--the kind of commitment they want from you day in and day out in order to meet your quotas. You have very little left to give to anything else after these 50+ hour corporate workweeks.

I've been able to grow my business slowly. SLOWLY. Part-time focus brings part-time results. Doesn't it?

This past year, I finally admitted to myself, "What is the definition of insanity? It is doing the same thing over and over and over again and expecting different results." I knew I couldn't do this part-time anymore. I knew I needed to focus on it with everything I've got in order to make some real gains. So, that's what I've been doing for the past six months ... and I'm seeing better results than I ever have before. Fantastic.

But here's the downside to that. This past week, two of my family members (non-entrepreneurial family members, which most of them are) expressed concern at what they perceive to be my "unhealthy obsession" on my online business. And that really bothered me. Growing a business from the ground up is damn hard work that requires a dedicated focus. I need cheerleaders around me during those times when I'm questioning myself. I need support--emotional and otherwise. I need to hear someone close to me say, "YOU CAN DO IT!" rather than expressing concern that what I'm doing is "unhealthy" because I don't have a "real job" to support myself right now.

Is there anyone on this forum tonight who is experiencing (or has experienced) the same thing that I'm experiencing right now? Someone who can offer me at least some digital support here? Be my online cheerleader? If yes, then I'd love to hear from you. I need a cheerleader tonight.

And what advice do you have for me to keep on keeping on? I need that advice tonight. Thank you in advance for it.
#off topic forum #entrepreneurship #online business
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Best Seller View Post


    This past year, I finally admitted to myself, "What is the definition of insanity? It is doing the same thing over and over and over again and expecting different results." I knew I couldn't do this part-time anymore. I knew I needed to focus on it with everything I've got in order to make some real gains. So, that's what I've been doing for the past six months ... and I'm seeing better results than I ever have before. Fantastic.

    But here's the downside to that. This past week, two of my family members (non-entrepreneurial family members, which most of them are) expressed concern at what they perceive to be my "unhealthy obsession" on my online business. And that really bothered me. Growing a business from the ground up is damn hard work that requires a dedicated focus. I need cheerleaders around me during those times when I'm questioning myself. I need support--emotional and otherwise. I need to hear someone close to me say, "YOU CAN DO IT!" rather than expressing concern that what I'm doing is "unhealthy" because I don't have a "real job" to support myself right now.

    Is there anyone on this forum tonight who is experiencing (or has experienced) the same thing that I'm experiencing right now? Someone who can offer me at least some digital support here? Be my online cheerleader? If yes, then I'd love to hear from you. I need a cheerleader tonight.

    And what advice do you have for me to keep on keeping on? I need that advice tonight. Thank you in advance for it.
    YOU CAN,....ARRM, OH YEAH, DO SOMETHING!

    Ok, lets get serious, l have been online for 9 years, full time, and understand all of the crap you are getting from your family, and most likely friends, nothing new here.

    If l had listened to my friends, (what is left offline) and family l would be in a stupid job, slaving away, probably til l dropped dead. I know, jobs are not stupid just very restrictive, and usually leads to overseas holidays, a wedding or two, and then bloke and ailing health when you retire, etc.

    I thought stuff that, so have slaved away on things ranging from websites, blogs, software development, list building, product development and so forth.

    9 years later what have l got, (yeah, l know, don't bring up that song).

    A way of doing flyers very quickly, so much so, if l employed someone, l could become wealthy within a few years.

    Doing it myself, and working reasonably hard, probably doubling $600 every month.

    I could make a fulltime wage within a year, and then keep going, since their is no ceiling.

    No ceiling means that l could become a millionaire doing this, most people can't comprehend that, apart from a dumb Tatts ticket.

    And since they cannot comprehend it, it is classified as dumb luck or gambling.


    I don't consider what l am doing as gambling, it is just trying everything online til you whittle it down to an area you are good at and something that works.

    At face value, nothing works online and everything is virtually impossible, unless you have a magic wand handy.

    The wealth comes to those that will persist, regardless of anyone or anything. You family will come around to your way of thinking, even if they put your success into the luck catagory.

    Saying you are lucky is a copout, or a way they can cope with their restrictive lifestyle. Which has a tendency of catching up with them later on in life.

    My brother is the type that thinks that he knows everything, so already knows that wealth online is dumb luck. And l am headed for broke, destitute and selling pens on a street corner.

    Lol, not now!

    I will be rich in the next 5 years, l have run the numbers, probably 3 if l wasn't so lazy.

    I will retire at 55, and my brother will probably be at it til he is 67, then blow the super and go on the pension.


    Unfortunately he doesn't ask me anymore about my online thing, he just thinks the worst, and assumes that l will only make pocket money.

    My Mother has also been like that lately, but after spitting the dummy recently, is more up to date.

    If you want wealth online, then put the blinders on. Obviously don't tell something to bu***off, not unless you have to.


    My experience is, you can talk to them til you are blue in the face, and they won't believe you, or come up with more silly reasons it won't work.


    The only thing that will convince is a sh**load of cash on the kitchen table, but a new BMW out front might also do the trick?

    Good luck, keep going, change tracks when needed, ignore the foolish, and ummm, keep going.

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    • Profile picture of the author eezyuk
      Sounds like me ,already 10 years in and still scraping away with no support whatsoever... Wondering whether the shovel I am using is the wring shape....
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by eezyuk View Post

        Sounds like me ,already 10 years in and still scraping away with no support whatsoever... Wondering whether the shovel I am using is the wring shape....
        10 YEARS!!! ok.

        No, if someone comes into this game and expects support from friends and family, or desperately needs approval from others then this may not be for you.

        But, l guess that wealth isn't for everyone either?

        It isn't easy sitting by the pool while the sun is setting over your luxery hotel room, and a warm breeze is swaying the palm trees, with the distant roar of ocean waves, knowing that your bank balance keeps going up.

        Especially when everyone in your state, is battling rain, in peak hour traffic, trying to get home in time to watch the latest idiot marrying a total stranger, or doing that while cooking.

        PS 10 years thought, let us know what you are doing, maybe we can help?
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        • Profile picture of the author Best Seller
          Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

          No, if someone comes into this game and expects support from friends and family, or desperately needs approval from others then this may not be for you.
          If you're referring to the OP, then this is a bit of an exaggeration.

          Everyone needs to vent a little bit sometimes. And no man (woman) is an island, either ... which is why there are forums like this where we can go to chat, learn from each other, vent occasionally, and support each other through the rough spots. There's no shame in that.

          Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

          It isn't easy sitting by the pool while the sun is setting over your luxery hotel room, and a warm breeze is swaying the palm trees, with the distant roar of ocean waves, knowing that your bank balance keeps going up.
          If you are having the kind of success that allows you to spend ample time in luxury hotel rooms, then good for you. You've obviously done many things right. But no doubt you also had to struggle through a few rough spots along the way to that success.

          Admitting the human aspects of it to others is far from being a weakness ... it is a strength because it helps lift up the people who follow in your footsteps.
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          • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
            Originally Posted by Best Seller View Post

            If you're referring to the OP, then this is a bit of an exaggeration.

            Everyone needs to vent a little bit sometimes. And no man (woman) is an island, either ... which is why there are forums like this where we can go to chat, learn from each other, vent occasionally, and support each other through the rough spots. There's no shame in that.
            Hmmm, maybe. Some need to please everyone, so virtually every story l hear about someone dying doing something silly, since someone else wanted them to, almost always encompasses, them helping everyone.

            It is ok, to help out within reason but if someone wants me to take a ride with a drunk, then forget it!

            If you are having the kind of success that allows you to spend ample time in luxury hotel rooms, then good for you. You've obviously done many things right. But no doubt you also had to struggle through a few rough spots along the way to that success.

            Admitting the human aspects of it to others is far from being a weakness ... it is a strength because it helps lift up the people who follow in your footsteps.
            Arrrrm, not yet, give me a few months, and l will probably be there?

            Done many things right, hmmm, hard to say. I have pretty much failed at everything l have done, or it wasn't scalable, or l could only make a few hundred from it, etc.

            Never, it actually works and l can scale it.

            Least not until very recently.


            I know where you are coming from, l needed those 9 years of failure to succeed, but phew,....l think that a holiday is definitely due.

            Just imagine if l had given up at the 5 year mark! Mediocre life, and not much in the way of swaying palms near beaches.

            And something else that l do if l feel a bit low, (well, l don't really need it now) is to go and watch a PPC Amit Metcha's video, where he discusses how he made 10k in a month and the huge obstacles that he overcame.

            I particularly like the Sychissus pushing the bolder up a hill, and once over the tipping point success becomes quicker and easier.

            "But any business is a steep learning curve, and is a lot of hard work, but once over that tipping point your income will skyrocket, (sic*)".

            I have watched it a few times, lol.

            So find a motivational video or movie and have it on standby if someone silly gives you a grilling, and doubt come in.

            The end of the Shawshank Redemption, where hope is good and it end up on a beach, is another.

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  • Profile picture of the author Eddie Grant
    It's lonely at the top!

    I've had to grow my offline and online business's, all self funded, and all on my own. At times it feels like everyone around you is full of negativity, but they probably think they have your best interests at heart.

    Pretty much everyone has at some point tried to have a "serious chat" with me and tried to convince me to get a regular job and join the 9 to 5. But I know from past experience that I wouldn't be happy working for somebody else. I've got to be building all the time!

    Keep at it man, and you can spend time with your friends and family when you're rich!
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Eddie Grant View Post

      It's lonely at the top!

      I've had to grow my offline and online business's, all self funded, and all on my own. At times it feels like everyone around you is full of negativity, but they probably think they have your best interests at heart.

      Pretty much everyone has at some point tried to have a "serious chat" with me and tried to convince me to get a regular job and join the 9 to 5. But I know from past experience that I wouldn't be happy working for somebody else. I've got to be building all the time!

      Keep at it man, and you can spend time with your friends and family when you're rich!
      Yes, l had my family try to have a serious chat with me about a year ago.

      Pretty much the "you have reached an age where it will probably be virtually impossible to get a ....job".

      i was thinking good, l don't want it!

      Fear, ignorance and pack thinking, keeps most in a 9 -5 rut.


      But after a certain age, you get a gold watch, and kicked out the door. What do you do then, at almost 70, get another job?

      Or buy a Laptop or PC, and spend the next 5 - 10 years learning all of this IM stuff, so you can enjoy your remaining years.


      Best to ignore all of the fear, and just go for it.


      Most cannot stare into the abyss, but if you want to succeed then it is ineviatable, but that is ok, you get million dollar ideas when you are rock bottom.

      Ignore your stupid friends, when you are at a low point, you need lows to reach highs.

      I had to reach a low point in order to see the recent opportunity, so l know what l am saying. This isn't some crap out of a motivational book.

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  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    I think it depends on WHICH family members are criticizing your online work.

    The critique might be due to you being too willing to talk about your online business - or unwilling to STOP talking about it. It's a common fault of many marketers and truth is, most people aren't that interested in the details. If these family members are close to you - depend on you for support, etc - they might be express worry/fear in the only way they know how.

    you can spend time with your friends and family when you're rich
    I know a man who lost his wife and two daughters because once he began working online....he could talk of nothing else...had no interest in anything except his online activity ....expected everyone around him to be a cheerleader. There is a work/life balance you need to maintain.

    I think it's asking a lot of those around you that they become your "cheerleaders". They have their own work and life and while they may wish you well it's exhausting to be responsible for the emotional support of someone else.

    My suggestion is to learn to support yourself in a more positive way - whether it's meditation or exercise program or whatever suits you - have time away from thinking about your online work. Take days off here and there - have work hours rather than all-day-all-the-time focus on your online efforts.

    It's normal to be depressed at times - hard to keep working day after day when it feels like a slog. But - that's not the fault of others. Keeping you motivated is not the responsibility of others. Take a day off - take a few deep breaths and smell the roses - then get back to it.

    For me it was always taking my dog for a walk in the woods to get my head straight - and then back to work. If family members are expressing concern - look to see if there's a reason for their concern. If not, just smile and keep doing what you are doing.
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  • Profile picture of the author Best Seller
    THANK YOU ALL. I needed that interaction. Thank you.

    To speak to what Kay King just wrote above (which is a really good point!)...

    I never talk about this business obsessively with my family ... I know better than to do so. I only speak of it when asked. And, when asked, I provide all the details that are asked for.

    I also have other activities in addition to the business. I work out daily. I meet with friends for coffee or drinks weekly. I interact with my authors regularly (e.g. helping with their publicity tours, answering their questions, etc). And I take time to relax and smell the roses.

    I also meditate. Great advice, Kay. I meditate daily.
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  • Profile picture of the author hardraysnight
    so get a cat
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    • Profile picture of the author Ron Lafuddy
      Originally Posted by hardraysnight View Post

      so get a cat
      Cats can be lonely, too. Better get more than one.

      Ron
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  • Profile picture of the author ZachMiller
    This may be a rabbit hole.. but it will make you feel better..

    Watch NLP Hypnotherapist Richard Bandler on YouTube..

    See if you're not as happy as when you were a kid once it's all done..
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  • Profile picture of the author NewEnglandah
    I understand what you're saying. I just don't tell anybody how much time I spend working online. I was wondering if you get lower back pain from all of the work?
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    • Profile picture of the author Best Seller
      Originally Posted by NewEnglandah View Post

      I understand what you're saying. I just don't tell anybody how much time I spend working online. I was wondering if you get lower back pain from all of the work?
      No. I'm also at the gym regularly, so that helps me keep things like back pain at bay.
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