Father Christmas must be a man, council decides

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https://metro.co.uk/2018/11/29/fathe...cides-8192215/

Finally some sanity!

Although creepy lonely guys would be lining up, if this changed, and pushing the kids aside.

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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

    https://metro.co.uk/2018/11/29/fathe...cides-8192215/

    Finally some sanity!

    Although creepy lonely guys would be lining up, if this changed, and pushing the kids aside.


    I beg your pardon Tag. I am not lonely - just creepy
    BTW all the council had to do was let the wife, minus her husband, stand on a street corner and sit on the men's laps. Everyone is happy
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

      I beg your pardon Tag. I am not lonely - just creepy
      BTW all the council had to do was let the wife, minus her husband, stand on a street corner and sit on the men's laps. Everyone is happy
      No, Jeffery l didn't have you in mind when l wrote that!

      And Claude did try that once, but since all of the kids, took one look at the creepy santa, tears started to well up in their eye's, and they ran away screaming to Mommy, "Scary Santa, Arrrrggg".

      The helpers, or Elves tried everything, including a $100 note bribe to their Mothers, but it was useless.

      Claude then went home, (in the santa suit) got drunk and collapsed in a gutter, but the stray dogs, did give their stamp of approval, to say the least.

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      • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
        Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

        No, Jeffery l didn't have you in mind when l wrote that!
        That's okay. I'm married and used to never being on someone's mind. Well, except on paydays I suppose.

        Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

        And Claude did try that once, but since all of the kids, took one look at the creepy santa, tears started to well up in their eye's, and they ran away screaming to Mommy, "Scary Santa, Arrrrggg".
        and Claude was right behind the mommies with a wicked grin on his face. Clever Claude!

        Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

        The helpers, or Elves tried everything, including a $100 note bribe to their Mothers, but it was useless.
        Hey, every good Santa has to have a pimp or two. Clever Claude!

        Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

        Claude then went home, (in the santa suit) got drunk and collapsed in a gutter, but the stray dogs, did give their stamp of approval, to say the least.
        Good Soldier. Clever Claude!
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  • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
    When Santa wants to pick up 3 prostitutes to try out his (sex) toys on, he just goes down Wooster's main street and shouts: "HO, HO, HO"

    When Claude sat on Santa's lap in the grotto, what did Santa say? "Gerrrrofff"

    When Claude worked as Santa at Macy's and a pretty 18 year old girl sat on his lap, he emptied his Sac
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

      When Claude worked as Santa at Macy's and a pretty 18 year old girl sat on his lap, he emptied his Sac
      Lies!!! Claude never worked as a Santa.

      They don't make Santa costumes that big.
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      • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        Lies!!! Claude never worked as a Santa.

        They don't make Santa costumes that big.
        Plus Claude has a court order banning him from being within a 5 mile radius of anyone under the age of 50.
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    I don't see what the big deal is...any woman is twice the man Claude is.
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

    Lies!!! Claude never worked as a Santa.

    They don't make Santa costumes that big.
    True, another reason why small children, and some adults run away screaming.

    Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

    That's okay. I'm married and used to never being on someone's mind. Well, except on paydays I suppose.


    and Claude was right behind the mommies with a wicked grin on his face. Clever Claude!


    Hey, every good Santa has to have a pimp or two. Clever Claude!


    Good Soldier. Clever Claude!
    Dammit, these Fiverr endorsements need to stop.

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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Saw a Female wearing a Santa type suit yesterday talking to some elves, (yeah, l know, this time of the year) and thought, no, don't tell me, but she was not wearing a beird, and l later realized that she was Santa's wife, phew, thank goodness, our state already has too much to be proud of.

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