Yeah I know. But the curious nature of my Mind always seek to try to rationalize everything. And there is just NO rationalizing this.

A crazy thought entered my mind the other day when I was driving through a grocery store lane. There was an elderly woman just taking her sweet time on a Walker while I was in a hurry to get by. I said to myself what if I yelled to her, "get out of the way you old bag of bones". Just a random, senseless thought. And then I thought to myself what a shock it would be to her and how bad I would feel if I did something like that.

Let alone push her, or hit her, or worse.

Human behavior just escapes me sometimes.

I used to know a man who was a kind generous thoughtful man, until he drank. Then he wanted to fight at the slightest provocation. When he was sober, he apologized profusely to me. I told him that I knew he was a good guy, but that he was someone who shouldn't ever drink, because then he would hurt people.

People react differently to alcohol. My Dad was a drinker for a few decades. Fall down drunk. When drunk, he was quiet...not mean, not loud...just quiet. I tend to get a little louder (when I used to drink).

I think there isn't one real person. Drinking changes us. Some of us in subtle ways, some in profound ways.

But I firmly believe that we are not just one real person.

My brother-in-law asked me once about why I acted differently when selling. I asked him if he was the same person around babies, at work, with his wife, with friends,

He said "No. I act differently depending on the circumstances".
I said "Everyone does. Which one is real? All of them. We are all of them".

And I think drunk people are just changed a little when they drink. It's all the real them.

Man, I love listening to the sound of my own voice!

Didn't give a damn or thought that he was right?

True psychopaths will sleep like a baby, which is why we hear story's about sex slaves or people treated like dirt for decades, kept prisoner in other peoples homes.

Although relatively normal people can act in this way then switch to normal most of the time, (an episode in MASH, tv series where a young guy kills several people, ends up in hospital and wants to write his Mother, like nothing has happened).

And others do this they go insane and others do this they are worried, or it seems that psychotic behavior is linked to past trauma and or social economic conditioning.

Always find Cold cases interesting. We had one here in NJ called Princes Doe. She was found murdered in 1982 they just solved the case this past July. Forty Years to the day. Even the FBI used her case for training.

"One such case is that of Princess Doe of Blairstown, one of the nation's most puzzling mysteries and coldest cases. On July 15, 1982, the body of a white female was found by workers at the Cedar Ridge Cemetery on Route 94 in Blairstown, Warren County. The girl's age was estimated between 14 and 18 years, she was 5-feet 2-inches tall, and weighed about 110 pounds. She had been dead five to ten days. She had been beaten to death with a blunt instrument."

"On June 30, 1983, Princess Doe became the first person entered into the FBI's national computerized unidentified deceased files. The case is now a textbook course taught at the FBI Academy in Quantico, Va..... "

Here is a link to the story https://weirdnj.com/stories/princess-doe/

If the killer was a Sociopath, he would blame the victim or society for his crime. And he would likely eventually tell someone....usually as bragging.

A psychopath would never tell anyone, or show any remorse. Psychopaths don't feel rapport, but they can feel regret.

Most murders are not done by sociopaths or psychopaths. Most are momentary loses of control. And the murderer genuinely feels terrible after the fact. But feeling terrible about something you have done may not be enough to turn yourself in, or confess to a murder.

This is just based on things I've read about psychopaths and sociopaths. Who really knows?