Calmness in Our Lives

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Now that we're in the middle of the hectic holiday season, I am passing this on to you because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives.

By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning...

I finished off a bottle of Bordeaux, a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates, and a half bottle of scotch.

You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now. Pass this on to those whom you think might be in need of inner peace.
  • Profile picture of the author Dave Patterson
    Say Hi to all the good folks in Oblivion for me...OK?
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    Professional Googler
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  • Profile picture of the author Dennis Gaskill
    Didn't work for me, Ken. I finished off a 6-month old carton of milk, a 3-week old pizza, and a year old package of Ex-Lax. I'm feeling really weird, not calm, and I'm starting to hallucinate.
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    Just when you think you've got it all figured out, someone changes the rules.

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    • Profile picture of the author kevtycoon
      Lol! Love it. Reminds me of :

      I'd give up drink but I'm no Quitter
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  • Profile picture of the author Sheryl Polomka
    LMAO - I'm gonna go find what I can finish off
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Thanks Ken. I already finished everything I have to finish, so now I feel bad.
    You could have at least out-sourced something, ya know.
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    Sal
    When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
    Beyond the Path

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    • Profile picture of the author pickthat apple
      I would love some Baileys right now after packing all these presents...
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