Why are women attracted to dangerous men?

by gareth
38 replies
  • OFF TOPIC
  • |
Lets face it they are.

Basically its hormones. there is no sophisticated psychoanalytical reason required.

I am reading all these convoluted answers on the net about them having dysfunctional fathers etc but its nonsense.

Basically what is perceived as dangerous in males is usually the result of testosterone.

Also dangerous is not necessarily bad. Soldiers are dangerous, athletes, policemen, powerful men are dangerous.

So I think this is normal for women to feel attracted to these men. Men behave or develop these characteristics because of testosterone.

The thing is that I know some girls find me dangerous - I am shy and brooding around hot female strangers. Now I overhear them sometimes or you hear gossip etc. Basically I thought this was a bad thing - women thinking I am dangerous.

But now I see it as a positive.

It means they find me attractive - heh heh heh. So I'm gunna have to exploit this characteristic of the female psyche instead of just being even more shy.
  • Profile picture of the author Swit 16
    I think some women find them more romantic and some prefer aggressive men rather than cool and quiet men.
    Signature

    I am the Best Article Writer

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4225924].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author mojojuju
      Originally Posted by Swit 16 View Post

      I think some women find them more romantic and some prefer aggressive men rather than cool and quiet men.

      Yet other women seem to prefer cool, quiet, and dangerous men.

      Signature

      :)

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240482].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author claudenat
    Women feel more protected if they are with dangerous men. No one will have the guts to make fun of them or to mess around with them. The feeling of security will always be there.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4231898].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author scrapgirl42
    Originally Posted by Ken_Caudill View Post

    There's Han Solo dangerous, then there's Jeffrey Dahmer dangerous.

    Be careful.
    Amen to that! Give me quiet and thoughtful any day
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4231951].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author thunderbird
    It may be that those dangerous characteristics are related to higher testosterone levels in some men. Naturally women (and other kinds of female monkeys) will be attracted to males more likely to help them produce vigorous offspring. Studies suggest that such males are less likely to stick around, so other less-manly male monkeys will come along to play the role of helping raise the offspring.

    (Before you get offended and attack me, I was being sarcastic. Here's the kind of article I'm talking about:

    Fromhttp://www.livescience.com/14713-wom...den-areas.html

    "Genetic trade-off

    Good-gene and good-dad traits aren't all mutually exclusive. But past research has shown that males with high testosterone are more likely than more feminine guys to have a healthy immune system and other good genetic qualities that tend to make them worse dads: They are more likely to have shorter, less committed relationships. "It is a trade-off," Lee said. "Men with higher testosterone levels have better immune functioning, indicative of genetic quality, but tend to make poor parents, poor dads." [The Animal Kingdom's Most Devoted Dads]"
    )
    Signature

    Project HERE.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4232007].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sscot
    Warrior ladies, this thread is for you.
    Signature



    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4232018].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      More proof that myths about women are just as false as myths about men.
      Signature
      Saving one dog will not change the world - but the world changes forever for that one dog.
      ***
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4232058].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Well, hell yes. Dangerous -- strong, limber - can kill with bare hands. Who doesn't want a guy like that? They can keep the cats and bears off you while you are free to go collect your gemstones. They can pull the plow at home and pick up couches so you can vacuum under them. And, too, there's nothing better than fresh meat on the hoof when the grocery prices get ridiculous. There's also a lot of savings on home security system when you have your own human pit bull parked under a window.

    It just makes good sense.

    :rolleyes:
    Signature

    Sal
    When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
    Beyond the Path

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234368].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ThomM
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

      Well, hell yes. Dangerous -- strong, limber - can kill with bare hands. Who doesn't want a guy like that? They can keep the cats and bears off you while you are free to go collect your gemstones. They can pull the plow at home and pick up couches so you can vacuum under them. And, too, there's nothing better than fresh meat on the hoof when the grocery prices get ridiculous. There's also a lot of savings on home security system when you have your own human pit bull parked under a window.

      It just makes good sense.

      :rolleyes:
      And then there's this
      Signature

      Life: Nature's way of keeping meat fresh
      Getting old ain't for sissy's
      As you are I was, as I am you will be
      You can't fix stupid, but you can always out smart it.

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234442].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author HeySal
        Originally Posted by ThomM View Post

        And then there's this
        LMAO - now I know what the sticker on the front door with the small print said. Never did bother to read that one.

        That makes sense, too.
        Signature

        Sal
        When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
        Beyond the Path

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234764].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Kurt
        Originally Posted by ThomM View Post

        And then there's this
        Thom...You need to know...My step dad was a blind door-to-door salesman back in the late 60's.

        Once in a while I'd go with him as a "seeing eye kid" and I'd see a sign that said "No solicitors" and he'd tell me to shut up, he was blind. Knock knock knock.
        Signature
        Discover the fastest and easiest ways to create your own valuable products.
        Tons of FREE Public Domain content you can use to make your own content, PLR, digital and POD products.
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234859].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Rach72
    Originally Posted by Ken_Caudill View Post

    There's Han Solo dangerous, then there's Jeffrey Dahmer dangerous.

    Be careful.
    Yeah, that's a really important distinction to make.

    Women feel more protected if they are with dangerous men. No one will have the guts to make fun of them or to mess around with them. The feeling of security will always be there.
    There is a massive difference in the way that they treat feral animals too .... there are those that will kill a feral animal (like a possum) as quickly and humanely as possible. While there are those who will kick the sh** out of it and enjoy every moment.

    There are also women who will always choose certain type of moron and get the sh** kicked out of them too.

    And there are those who will stand by their man even when he is kicking the sh** out of her kids .....

    But at least the family will be safe from anyone intending to really hurt them right?
    Signature
    For PLR that Kicks Ass and Freelance Writing that'll Rock Your World
    ** New Guide for the Digital Writer**
    101 Writing Tips
    That Separate You From The Pack

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234462].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Frances Colleen
    By dangerous what do you mean exactly? I take it you mean men who are prone to having other women. For women attracted to dangerous men, I don't think they prefer these types on purpose. these men know how to flirt and make women feel special with their words and gestures. these men know how women work. too bad they are attracted to other women as well.
    Signature

    Need a quality, reliable ghostwriter? Ghostwritten content you can be proud of: www.francescolleenwrites.com

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234474].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ThomM
      There is a massive difference in the way that they treat feral animals too .... there are those that will kill a feral animal (like a possum) as quickly and humanely as possible. While there are those who will kick the sh** out of it and enjoy every moment.
      You forgot one. There are those who will not harm the animal at all and kick the crap out of the two types you mentioned.
      Signature

      Life: Nature's way of keeping meat fresh
      Getting old ain't for sissy's
      As you are I was, as I am you will be
      You can't fix stupid, but you can always out smart it.

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234599].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    Like I used to tell the ex...

    You hold 'em off, I'll run for help.
    Signature
    Discover the fastest and easiest ways to create your own valuable products.
    Tons of FREE Public Domain content you can use to make your own content, PLR, digital and POD products.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234634].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author HeySal
      Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

      Like I used to tell the ex...

      You hold 'em off, I'll run for help.
      Hey Kurt. Watch out for the rams and moose. They don't like things that are moving too fast -- especially if it's squealing while it's moving. :p
      Signature

      Sal
      When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
      Beyond the Path

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234906].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Kurt
        Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

        Hey Kurt. Watch out for the rams and moose. They don't like things that are moving too fast -- especially if it's squealing while it's moving. :p
        Like the line in the movie said, I don't need to be faster than the moose (bear), I just need to be faster than you.
        Signature
        Discover the fastest and easiest ways to create your own valuable products.
        Tons of FREE Public Domain content you can use to make your own content, PLR, digital and POD products.
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234921].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author HeySal
          Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

          Like the line in the movie said, I don't need to be faster than the moose (bear), I just need to be faster than you.

          By all means, you first, Sir. I'll just hang back here and watch you test the theory from that movie.
          Signature

          Sal
          When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
          Beyond the Path

          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4234958].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author Kurt
            Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

            By all means, you first, Sir. I'll just hang back here and watch you test the theory from that movie.
            You go right ahead...I've seen plenty of clips of people standing still getting abused by a moose, especially during mating season...So while Bullwinkle is whispering sweet nothings into your ear and humming Love Is In The Air...I'm out of there.

            Signature
            Discover the fastest and easiest ways to create your own valuable products.
            Tons of FREE Public Domain content you can use to make your own content, PLR, digital and POD products.
            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240283].message }}
            • Profile picture of the author HeySal
              Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

              You go right ahead...I've seen plenty of clips of people standing still getting abused by a moose, especially during mating season...So while Bullwinkle is whispering sweet nothings into your ear and humming Love Is In The Air...I'm out of there.

              YouTube - ‪Confused Moose‬‏
              Oh, bananas. No - not that they won't knock the stuffings out of you if you don't know exactly how to act around em......... they like bananas. There were many where I used to live. I watched a few people get kicked myself.

              It was illegal to shoot them on Mainstreet in Wallace, by the way. So don't.
              Signature

              Sal
              When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
              Beyond the Path

              {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4241341].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author ThomM
          Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

          Like the line in the movie said, I don't need to be faster than the moose (bear), I just need to be faster than you.
          That reminded me of a time long ago when I brought a friend camping at 13th lake.
          He had never really been camping before so I decided to have a little fun with him.
          After we set up camp on a remote part of the lake I asked him how fast he could run.
          He asked why and I said I wanted to know if I had to trip him or if I could out run him when the black bears came into our camp that night.
          Poor guy didn't sleep a wink that night
          Signature

          Life: Nature's way of keeping meat fresh
          Getting old ain't for sissy's
          As you are I was, as I am you will be
          You can't fix stupid, but you can always out smart it.

          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240427].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    I suppose Thomas Crown (Pierce Brosnan) was a "good" kind of dangerous guy
    Signature
    "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240151].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Alexa Smith
      Banned
      Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

      I suppose Thomas Crown (Pierce Brosnan) was a "good" kind of dangerous guy
      Arguably. But perhaps not quite to the extent that Steve McQueen had been, 30 years earlier in the original version.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240726].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
        Well I haven't seen that one so ... Like the "Sinner man" song in the remake though.
        Signature
        "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240752].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author DireStraits
        Originally Posted by Alexa Smith View Post

        Arguably. But perhaps not quite to the extent that Steve McQueen had been, 30 years earlier in the original version.
        Steve McQueen was the man.

        I'd kind of rather watch Bullit than The Thomas Crown Affair, though. (Didn't think the Brosnan remake was too bad, though, myself ...).

        Damn, though. They'll never make movie stars like McQueen, Newman, et al., ever again.
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4243849].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author smith33122
    so who is going to put up a wso called being dangerous in the digital age?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240503].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author JackPowers
    I am partial to dangeous women.
    Signature

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4240856].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author iidesu
    How could you be shy and dangerous at the same time?
    Signature
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4243372].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author HeySal
      Originally Posted by iidesu View Post

      How could you be shy and dangerous at the same time?
      From Sig: gabriella psychic

      Um....you tell us.
      Signature

      Sal
      When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
      Beyond the Path

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4243853].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author DireStraits
    I'll tell you what I think.

    I wrote a long post, detailing all the different explanations and scenarios I could think of ... but, frankly, I think this one word pretty much sums it up in most cases: MANIPULATION.

    There's a difference between an able-bodied guy who's prepared to protect his partner and his family, and a guy who's just a total meat-headed numbskull. Yes, there's still a huge element of women "wanting to feel safe with a guy", despite the fact our systems of law and order have somewhat removed the responsibility (or, indeed, the likelihood) of him having to do so; but overall, most of the women with violent, aggressive guys are either totally thick (and thus incapable of doing anything for themselves) or bright but sick (or perhaps lazy).

    Essentially, she's a violent person who's just using him to do her dirty work, because that way she doesn't put her own freedoms in jeopardy. He perhaps believes that what he's doing is a sign of "respect" for her, which he hopes will be repaid, but the reality is likely that she doesn't respect him one bit. She's using him as a tool, like the tool he is. And like any tool, he'll be discarded when he's exceeded his useful lifespan. Of course, he's doing it for sex, too.

    Has anyone else ever noticed a real correlation between the degree to which a guy is overtly strong and macho - and proud and boastful of the fact, to the point that he goes round trying to assert his authority over everyone else with physical threats and pure force - and the degree to which he's easily manipulated, emotionally vulnerable and frankly a little bit dumb?

    I certainly have, because there's no shortage of people like that where I live.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4243983].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author gforces
    I don't think they are in fact. It's a Hollywood myth.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4244657].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    Originally Posted by cosmokid View Post

    So...if you're a woman, always have your own money, independent means of transportation, lots of personal backup in the forms of friends and emergency contact people, various "safe houses" you can go to if you need to to physically "disappear" from such guys, and always, always be careful. You can be several years into a relationship when this behavior surfaces.
    Phew. Glad I'm not a woman.
    Signature
    "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4247681].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author dagaul101
    Maybe in some level the dangerous ones are the ones likely to offer the best protection
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4250400].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author jasdon
    I also think that so called 'dangerous' men are better company than others. Some of the most violent people I know are also the best to be around 95% of the time.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4251681].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author bstnisha
    Ya it is true that women love to get a man of strong physic but it depends on their sense of security. But most of the ladies love a chocolate cream soldier. Me too.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4251910].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author mehmlyndsy
    I think it depends on woman's choice. Some like cool some like aggressive some like tall e.t.c
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4251941].message }}

Trending Topics