A Handful of Chuckles

by 3 replies
4
From an email from a friend...

A couple drove several miles down a country road, not saying a word after an earlier discussion had led to an argument, and neither wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules and pigs, the wife sarcastically asked, "Relatives of yours?"

"Yep," the husband replied, "In-laws."

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A brunette is trying to get across a river and suddenly she spots a blonde on the other side.

She yells over to the blonde, "Hey, how do I get over to the other side?"

After a quick look around the blonde calls back, "You ARE on the other side!"

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a carrot stick up his nose, a pea in his left ear, and a cucumber wedged under his right eyelid.

Man: "Tell me the truth, Doc, what's the matter with me?"

Doctor: "You're not eating properly."

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. As he's sitting there the jar of nuts on the bar tells him what a nice shirt he is wearing.

Very disturbed by this, he goes to the cigarette machine to buy a pack of smokes. As he approaches the machine it starts shouting vulgarities at him.

In a panic he runs to the bar and tells the bartender what happened. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, the peanuts are complimentary, but the cigarette machine is clearly out of order!"

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A big grizzly bear walks into a bar and says, "I’d like a bourbon and . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . coke."

"No problem,” said the bartender, “but why the big paws?"
#off topic forum
  • LMAO -- oh those are good, Dennis. You have some extra time on your hands these days.

    BTW:
    Who's Chuckles?
    • [1] reply
    • Maybe more importantly....Whose hand?
      • [1] reply

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    From an email from a friend... A couple drove several miles down a country road, not saying a word after an earlier discussion had led to an argument, and neither wanted to concede their position.