Would you have done the same thing or am I just a sentimental sap?

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Yesterday morning we went to the cemetery to plant flowers on the grave sites of my husband's great grandparents and grandparents just like we do every Memorial Day with my mother-in-law. We always bring a variety of red, white and blue flowers as great grandfather is a WWI vet.

The graves are under one of the many huge shady Oak trees that are prominent throughout the cemetery. I was busy planting red impatiens in the urn behind great grandfather's headstone when I happened to look up and saw a small lone grave marker in the blazing sun where the shade from the trees never hits.

The grass was burned around it, all yellow and dry and picky, it was a stark difference from the rest of the tombstones surrounded by plush, soft emerald green grass. I was drawn to it and proceeded to walk over to it to investigate, like the sun shining on it was beckoning me over.

When I got there, I saw that the headstone was not marble like all the others, but a slab of drab gray slate. The once arched slab of slate now only arched half way with a sharp angular slant down to the left to about the center of its height indicating it had at one point been broken off.

There were no ornate inscriptions carved into it, no markings whatsoever, actually, on either side. No name. No dates. Nothing to identify the person who had been deserted and forgotten so long ago. As a matter of fact, the only thing on it was bird poop, which to me was like adding insult to injury.

I don't know why, but it pulled at my heart strings causing my eyes to well up with tears. So I went back to our site, got the spade and six red impatiens and brought them over to the sad, lonely little tombstone and began to break up the fallow ground and then planted them in a line in front of that forgotten and faded slate marker.

I just couldn't bear the thought of it being deserted, unloved and uncared for, alone and long forgotten.

So, would you have done the same thing or am I just a sentimental sap?

Terra
  • Profile picture of the author salegurus
    Well done Terra,
    and no you are not a sentimental SAP...

    Even though i am considered a first generation American and can't claim that
    i have family members who sacrificed everything for this country, i do have relatives
    who served with the Allies in WW1 and WW2.

    Even so...

    I am grateful to those who served and continue to serve today who are
    making the biggest sacrifice to protect our way of life...
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    • Profile picture of the author DGFletcher
      Aww. I think it's cute! *hugs*.

      Somebody's ghost is happy for a day. (or is that morbid??)
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      • Profile picture of the author MissTerraK
        Originally Posted by DGFletcher View Post

        Aww. I think it's cute! *hugs*.

        Somebody's ghost is happy for a day. (or is that morbid??)
        I don't believe that it is morbid at all and while I don't exactly believe in ghosts, I do believe that once one has passed on, one does indeed have the ability to see "across the great divide" so to speak.

        I surely hope I wasn't the only one happy with what I did.

        Terra
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        • Profile picture of the author Green Moon
          I think it is commendable. I have been working on my family's genealogy for several decades and have been saddened to see dozens of small cemeteries that have fallen into disuse and disrepair. I am always happy to read of someone retaking a "lost" cemetery, often as part of a community service or Eagle Scout project.

          Taking care of one lonely stone in an otherwise well-kempt cemetery is a nice thing to do.
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    • Profile picture of the author jimbo13
      Nice thing for you to do.

      It was a grave though wasn't it? You say all of the graves are under shady Oaks and have marble headstones so why is this one different?

      You're absolutely, hand on heart certain that you haven't lovingly tendered the piece of old masonry stuck into the ground that they tethered the goat to in olden times to keep the grass trim before lawnmowers were invented?

      Dan
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      • Profile picture of the author MissTerraK
        Originally Posted by jimbo13 View Post

        Nice thing for you to do.

        It was a grave though wasn't it? You say all of the graves are under shady Oaks and have marble headstones so why is this one different?

        You're absolutely, hand on heart certain that you haven't lovingly tendered the piece of old masonry stuck into the ground that they tethered the goat to in olden times to keep the grass trim before lawnmowers were invented?

        Dan
        Dan,

        There is no way that little tombstone could have kept a tethered goat. It was only about a foot tall, ten inches wide and about two inches thick.

        But thanks for the chuckle.

        Terra
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  • Profile picture of the author Dennis Gaskill
    Yes, you're sentimental, but I wouldn't call you a sap for it. It was a nice gesture.

    I surely hope I wasn't the only one happy with what I did.
    You weren't.
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    Just when you think you've got it all figured out, someone changes the rules.

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    • Profile picture of the author Tina Golden
      I don't visit graves (my own personal beliefs), but I think it was a lovely and kind gesture that you did.
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Do I think you are a sap? No. Would I have done the same? No. Out here in the west there are whole cemeteries that are long forgotten. Graves without any markers at all are common. It's a very eerie feeling to see the demise of so many that will never be remembered, but outside of a very few, eventually we are forgotten. Only our societies as a whole are remembered.
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    Sal
    When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
    Beyond the Path

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    • Profile picture of the author MissTerraK
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

      Only our societies as a whole are remembered.
      Well that is certainly a downer as true as it is.

      I mean I can't imagine what our society as a whole, that we're living in presently, will be remembered as.

      But I think I'll just focus on what I can do to make it a better place in the here and now. Even if it is just a small gesture from a sentimental heart.

      Terra
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  • Profile picture of the author Dennis Gaskill
    Whole societies may also be forgotten in time. Maybe it just takes longer. How do we know there aren't hundreds or even thousands of whole societies that are forgotten now? :confused:
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    Just when you think you've got it all figured out, someone changes the rules.

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    • Profile picture of the author jimbo13
      Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill View Post

      Whole societies may also be forgotten in time. Maybe it just takes longer. How do we know there aren't hundreds or even thousands of whole societies that are forgotten now? :confused:
      Well we do know. For example there are the erm now what were they called again?

      Dan
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  • Profile picture of the author Halcyon
    Why of course you're a sentimental sap.
    However the world needs more sentimental saps. Today, some people are too cynical, too selfish and too absorbed with their latest doohickey to be sentimental saps and that's too bad. We need more people who care just because it's the right thing to do and not because they're getting something in return.

    I think what you did was very cool.
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