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HELP ME! I am so awfully homesick and torn

by devonm
10 replies
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I have a beautiful house here in a new neighborhood, but I really REALLY miss my old neighborhood to death. I am currently 2 houses over from my mum's. I still am REALLY homesick for my friends and places at the old neighborhood and have some apartments bookmarked so that I can call to see if I should get one. I tried before, but the landlady is hard to understand and I thought I was supposed to leave here.

Turns out she was building a new "place" for an independent living next room over from this area. I was supposed to go there. I don't know if I will ever get over being homesick or what. What do I do?
  • Profile picture of the author David Maschke
    Hi,

    I hope I can help some.

    My mom moved from Alaska to Ohio when she was a young woman. She once told me a story of how she went for a walk in the woods when she was homesick for Alaska, and her friends and family.

    She sat down and suddenly dozens of butterflies flew all around her for quite some time. At that point, she knew God was telling her that she IS home now.

    I never forgot that story, and when I was in the service and felt homesick, I would find something I liked to establish my new home, whether it be a sunset, nice people, anything.

    Create a new routine, and burn the new faces around you into your memory. Talk to your new neighbors when you mom is present if that'll help take the edge off of talking to strangers.
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    • Profile picture of the author Newbieee
      Its quite hard to be in a new place.
      Its normal.

      Being somewhere different and doing something different is always not easy.

      Keep yourself busy, find something you really love to do and focus on it.

      Time will pass and you will get use to it. To the point this "new" experience is part of your life, NOT replacing the old. You can always go back to visit.
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      Pain is a perception, so is defeat & happiness!
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  • Profile picture of the author marketingva
    Devon,

    If you really want to go home to your own neighborhood get on the phone and start calling apartments. Try to find a way to go home and if that doesn't work out then you know you did everything you could.

    I know you try hard to be grateful for what you have but sometimes you are meant to walk another path. It may take some doing but I would try everything to get home before I would give up.

    Good luck,

    Bonnie
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  • Profile picture of the author devonm
    Mum says that they are going to get me a bus pass to take the city bus down to home when I want. I don't know if that will help, but I can't tell if that will make me feel better or worse and if I DO have to go back home for keeps. I don't know yet.
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Throw a "get acquainted" party of some sort for your new neighbors. You might find you enjoy them quite well, too. You could also invite a few of your old crowd to come so you will feel comfortable while getting to know the new people.
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    Sal
    When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
    Beyond the Path

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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      I can't tell if that will make me feel better
      Sometimes life says "no, you can't do that right now". If you want to feel better, you can - by accepting the solution your Mother offered instead of finding reasons it won't work.

      Your housing, needs and income are provided for you - that's a lot to be thankful for. If six hours between meals served is not enough to go see friends with the bus pass - skip a meal or buy a sandwich at the end of your visit. Make it work.

      Feeling good and being happy does not depend on having everything we want - but in appreciating what we do have.
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      • Profile picture of the author devonm
        Originally Posted by Kay King View Post


        Feeling good and being happy does not depend on having everything we want - but in appreciating what we do have.
        You are right about that. I was happy back then when I DIDN'T have the meals provided. Same, I can be happy here, I am okay here, but just not quite used to it yet. I think the bus pass will help some. Can't wait to try it.
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  • Profile picture of the author devonm
    I really am thinking Mums solution where I get a bus pass to go downtown will work. I don't know about Winter, though, but, nicer days in Winter, this still may work, so I HAVE cowboy'd up to this idea.
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  • Profile picture of the author marketingva
    Devon,

    I spent sixteen years near Washington, DC much of that time without a car. I got around on the bus and metro. I really liked riding the bus. I put in my headphones, brought a good book and zoned out until my stop. You might like it.

    Bonnie
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