Why women do not date Nice guys?!

hck1

10 years ago

Not true always in my opinion.

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thunderbird

10 years ago

That is an "article"? It seems more like a silly haphazard and off-the-wall blog post. I found that when I actively tried to date women, that was when I had more dates. Call it coincidence.

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Richard Van

10 years ago

How many people actually wrote that article and where did the evidence come from?

Sorry, I'm just wondering about the validity of it. It seems to have been penned my one person - "Lucia".

I'm wondering just how much Lucia is really able to vouch for the entire female population.

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Brian John

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Richard Van

How many people actually wrote that article and where did the evidence come from?
Sorry, I'm just wondering about the validity of it. It seems to have been penned my one person - "Lucia".
I'm wondering just how much Lucia is really able to vouch for the entire female population.

it was written for one reason... Lessons of Love - Lucia: TV Dating/Relationship Expert. Advice for single men & women

regarding just how valid all the points are...i don't think they really care.

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MissTerraK

10 years ago

Well, I believe a man who is worth dating is a little of both. Let me explain...

A man needs to be rugged, manly, strong, fearless and daring however, also needs to be kind, polite, gentle, tender and caring, but most of all, he needs the wisdom to know when to be which. Very, very important guys!

Terra

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Claude Whitacre

10 years ago

Originally Posted by MissTerraK

Well, I believe a man who is worth dating is a little of both. Let me explain...

A man needs to be rugged, manly, strong, fearless and daring however, also needs to be kind, polite, gentle, tender and caring, but most of all, he needs the wisdom to know when to be which. Very, very important guys!

Terra

Terra; That's amazing. Because I'm continually referred to (by beautiful women) as rugged, manly, strong, fearless, daring, and yet..also kind, polite, gentle, tender and caring.

Yup, that about sums it up. Oh, and humble....

And non-manipulative.:rolleyes:

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thunderbird

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

Terra; That's amazing. Because I'm continually referred to (by beautiful women) as rugged, manly, strong, fearless, daring, and yet..also kind, polite, gentle, tender and caring.

Yup, that about sums it up. Oh, and humble....

And non-manipulative.:rolleyes:

The beautiful women of Vancouver talk about you all the time, if they're not dreamily looking at posters of you on the wall.

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bizgrower

10 years ago

Originally Posted by MissTerraK

Well, I believe a man who is worth dating is a little of both. Let me explain...

A man needs to be rugged, manly, strong, fearless and daring however, also needs to be kind, polite, gentle, tender and caring, but most of all, he needs the wisdom to know when to be which. Very, very important guys!

Terra

Terra,

You might loose your woman card.

You forgot that he must always put the toilet
seat down, say no when you ask if it makes
you look fat, open doors, do the honey do list,
never look at another woman, and read your
mind. Sheesh, I thought Sal trained you better.

Dan

PS. I've seen those pictures of Claude in Vancouver.
And those women dreamily looking at the pictures.

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MissTerraK 10 years ago

Originally Posted by bizgrower

Terra,

You might loose your woman card.

Me? Miss girlie-girl who enjoys her femininity? Never gonna happen!

Originally Posted by bizgrower

You forgot that he must always put the toilet
seat down,

That falls under polite,

Originally Posted by bizgrower

say no when you ask if it makes
you look fat,

that falls under kind and gentle,

Originally Posted by bizgrower

open doors,

Under polite again,

Originally Posted by bizgrower

do the honey do list,

Under kind,

Originally Posted by bizgrower

never look at another woman,

Okay, that has nothing to do with a woman card. I'd never ask a man to never look at another woman again. Expecting the impossible will only lead to disappointment and heartbreak. Women should be more mature than that.

Originally Posted by bizgrower

and read your
mind.

Okay, asking the impossible again. I'd never expect that, however, I would expect him to study me and have a good idea of how my mind works, so we'll throw that in the wisdom category.

Originally Posted by bizgrower

Sheesh, I thought Sal trained you better.

Oh, she did, but in other aspects we haven't discussed here.

Originally Posted by bizgrower

Dan

PS. I've seen those pictures of Claude in Vancouver.
And those women dreamily looking at the pictures.

I'll just have to take your word for that one. :p

Terra
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Jonathan 2.0

Banned 10 years ago

　
I think Neil Strauss put it best:

“The dating dichotomy is not between good guys and bad guys or nice guys and mean guys. It's between weak men and strong men.”

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Claude Whitacre

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0

　
I think Neil Strauss put it best:

"The dating dichotomy is not between good guys and bad guys or nice guys and mean guys. It's between weak men and strong men."

I like that quote. In all my previous lives, I've been a woman, so I can vouch for the validity of this quote.

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Dan Riffle 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

I like that quote. In all my previous lives, I've been a woman, so I can vouch for the validity of this quote.

Just your previous lives?
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Horny Devil Banned 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

I like that quote. In all my previous lives, I've been a woman, so I can vouch for the validity of this quote.

**Rumour mill springs into action**

NEWS BULLETIN - Claude's (or should that be Claudette's) inbox is red hot as he/she fends off dinner date requests.
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- Claude Whitacre 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Horny Devil
  
  **Rumour mill springs into action**
  
  NEWS BULLETIN - Claude's (or should that be Claudette's) inbox is red hot
  
  Teee Heee! You said my "inbox is red hot". :rolleyes:
  
  Originally Posted by bizgrower
  
  I can see it now. Pen Name: Clyde DeCarlo - The next David DeAngelo
  
  I should call myself Les Littlemember. and advertise "If a guy named Les Littlemember can get girls with these techniques, you can too"
  
  I've given this a lot of thought.
  
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bizgrower 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

I like that quote. In all my previous lives, I've been a woman, so I can vouch for the validity of this quote.

I can see it now. Pen Name: Clyde DeCarlo - The next David DeAngelo
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- Alexa Smith Banned 10 years ago
  
  Don't look now, but his name is an anagram of Dahlia Cute-Crew
  
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HeySal

10 years ago

I'd call that a pretty close assessment to why women look for the men they do - but not sure what is meant by "nice guy" here. Sounds like they are talking about sedentary whimps with asthma. I've known a lot of really very kewl nice guys. Don't know why only the really meek dudes get characterized as "nice".

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Richard Van 10 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

Sounds like they are talking about sedentary whimps with asthma.

Yes but if you had asthma, you might well be a bit sedentary. Asthmatics don't make a habit of marathon running.

Doesn't make you a wimp does it?
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- HeySal 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Richard Van
  
  Yes but if you had asthma, you might well be a bit sedentary. Asthmatics don't make a habit of marathon running.
  
  Doesn't make you a wimp does it?
  
  Uh.........thanks, I know all about asthma. My parents were told I wouldn't make it through high school. I was just giving the particulars on what it sounded like they were saying when they use the term "nice guys".
  
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thunderbird

10 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

I'd call that a pretty close assessment to why women look for the men they do - but not sure what is meant by "nice guy" here. Sounds like they are talking about sedentary whimps with asthma. I've known a lot of really very kewl nice guys. Don't know why only the really meek dudes get characterized as "nice".

I re-read that article after your stated agreement with it, and it leaves me perplexed since I respect your perspective. That opinion piece still strikes me as resembling a haphazard blog post more than an actual article. To me, it still seems to be random spillage of disjointed thoughts and dubious proclamations backed up with nothing and full of sound and fury...signifying nothing.

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HeySal

10 years ago

Originally Posted by thunderbird

I re-read that article after your stated agreement with it, and it leaves me perplexed since I respect your perspective. That opinion piece still strikes me as resembling a haphazard blog post more than an actual article. To me, it still seems to be random spillage of disjointed thoughts and dubious proclamations backed up with nothing and full of sound and fury...signifying nothing.

I'm not sure it was trying to be an "article". It struck me as a list.....and as a list, it succeeded. Outlining what is meant by the "target" personality was a fail though.

I'm taking it that the target personality is that of a guy that has exquisite manners, but never speaks up for himself (whimp), has more sedentary interests (not rugged), , and is a so conventional in his habits that he leaves no room for surprises. He's the type of guy with no real electricity so you always want to just be friends with him. They are really best left to "nice girls". Well - that description about nails it without the list.

I think the list was right. It just ignores the fact that there's a whole lot of guys that don't fall into the "nice guy" category that also aren't "bad boys".

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lcombs

10 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

I'd call that a pretty close assessment to why women look for the men they do - but not sure what is meant by "nice guy" here. Sounds like they are talking about sedentary whimps with asthma. I've known a lot of really very kewl nice guys. Don't know why only the really meek dudes get characterized as "nice".

That was my thought.
"Nice" is not synonymous with "doormat", "Wimp", or "Weak".

And "Bad Boys" may keep it "real", but, by definition, THEY'RE BAD.
What pisses me off is listening to women bitch about what an ass their man is when they were drawn to him because he was an ass. Oh yeah! He kept it "real".

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Claude Whitacre

10 years ago

Originally Posted by lcombs

That was my thought.
"Nice" is not synonymous with "doormat", "Wimp", or "Weak".

And "Bad Boys" may keep it "real", but, by definition, THEY'RE BAD.
What pisses me off is listening to women bitch about what an ass their man is when they were drawn to him because he was an ass. Oh yeah! He kept it "real".

I think they meant he was "interesting". The problem is, that the novelty wears off, and then they are stuck with a dysfunctional guy.

What young women don't realize is that being the "Bad boy" is a mask. They are portraying someone they are not. And then after the first several dates, the girl realizes that the real person she's dating is just as uninteresting as the nice guy...except he's a loser.

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Horny Devil

Banned 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

. . . after the first several dates, the girl realizes that the real person she's dating is just as uninteresting as the nice guy...except he's a loser.

. . . or a woman, in a previous life.

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sbucciarel

Banned 10 years ago

Because "nice guys" aren't naughty enough ;

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bizteam

10 years ago

Originally Posted by awledd

I accidentally read this article and was LOL. Check it out:

12 Reasons Women Don't Date Nice Guys | YourTango

Thanks for the article , But I think woman always prefer nice guyson date..

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Horny Devil Banned 10 years ago
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- Kay King 10 years ago
  
  I accidentally read this article
  
  Sorry - but still chuckling over that part.
  
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- sbucciarel Banned 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Horny Devil
  
  There ya go. Leave it to Horny Devil :p
  
  To be quite honest, the men that my mother thought I should date (the nice guys), were completely uninteresting, boring, not fun, no sense of humor or adventure, and not particularly attractive (as in zero charisma).
  
  Sorry, but the word nice means many things to different people and not all of them are in any way appealing to some of us.
  
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- itswack 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Horny Devil
  
  ^^^
  this is true in some cases
  nice guys finish last cause they never try to go the extra distance
  
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  Daniel Evans 10 years ago
  
  People attract what they are.
  
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awledd

10 years ago

Maybe nice guys are unattractive b/c they are predictable.

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Frank Donovan 10 years ago

Originally Posted by awledd

Maybe nice guys are unattractive b/c they are predictable.

We all knew you were going to say that.
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Chosen2013

10 years ago

Woman do date almost any guys, nice guys date not less than "bad boys".
I'm not even going to read article with such a stupid title.

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Horny Devil Banned 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Chosen2013

Woman do date almost any guys, nice guys date not less than "bad boys".
I'm not even going to read article with such a stupid title.

You're obviously not the chosen one then.
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Lucian Lada

10 years ago

I take you people haven't read any of the comments found below the article - they are much more interesting than the article itself.

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Alexa Smith Banned 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Lucian Lada

I take you people haven't read any of the comments found below the article - they are much more interesting than the article itself.

What proportion of those guys are single, do you think?
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- Lucian Lada 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  What proportion of those guys are single, do you think?
  
  Anything below 100% is the result of chance, and a case of "the right person, at the right time, in the right place." Actually, forget about "the right person" bit; it's really just "a person, equipped with a dong, at the right time, in the right place."
  
  Not exactly something to be proud of ...
  
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TLTheLiberator

10 years ago

I my experience, I've found that women like men who are assertive and with a bit of rogue in them.

Not many want a yes man - until they marry you. LOL!

The guy doesn't have to be a real bad boy but many women want a guy who can and does at least challenge them in an intellectual manner and doesn't always try to be agreeable - no matter what.

The wife and I have gone almost 4 months without a serious argument. I asked her about it and she said she's simply tired and maybe there's some merit to many of my positions. LOL!

Women, can't live with them can't live without them. LOL!

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Dan Riffle 10 years ago

Originally Posted by TLTheLiberator

<snip>
Women, can't live with them can't live without them. LOL!

This is the truest thing you've ever said, TL. I mean, who's going to make the sandwiches?
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bizgrower

10 years ago

Sure, she'll make another sandwich. And then:

Muppets - Candice Bergen - Put another log on the...

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thunderbird

10 years ago

I guess the thing that annoys me most about that list is the implication that men are different from each other but women are all the same. That list is plain ridiculous on many levels. Reading it was like being in an elevator with someone with flatulence. Men and women are not all the same in their preferences and women's tastes are just as varied as men's. I guess the only thing good about the article or whatever it is, is that it is so blank, it inspires many readers to fill in the gaps with their own interpretations.

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kentah

10 years ago

Most women judge a man's strength by how well he 'handles objections'. Some nice guyz tend to be apologetic and kiss ass a lot to avoid being rejected. Yet this is precisely the reason they get rejected.
and yeah its true most of the bad boyz are just acting.

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garyv

10 years ago

That's kind of like saying that guys are attracted to those women that other women would call "whores". Of course guys are attracted to those who are confident with their bodies and know what they want, but it's not necessarily who they want to end up with at the end of the day.

I'm not a woman, but from observation it seems like they are more attracted to confidence. And a bad boy seems to always have confidence - whether it's earned or not is another story. Women don't necessarily want you to boss them around, but they don't want someone so lacking in confidence that they have to boss you around either.

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DR0832

10 years ago

Woman under 28 usually only date nice guys. Woman over 28 realize that they have made a terrible decision over the past 10 years trying to date "bad boys" who shiznit all over them and usually start dating nice guys.

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travlinguy

10 years ago

There's a theme working for certain product promoters in the dating market. It's completely aimed at guys. The concept is to be as aloof and standoffish and even rude as possible to women and they'll love you for it.

I guess that stuff appeals to guys that are like that. I'd also guess there are woman who dig that shtick too. It takes all kinds. After I accidentally noticed this thread and accidentally read the article I found it to be a cheap, spammy linkbait sorta thing without any real substance.

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Michael Ten

10 years ago

What is the purpose of this? I know many nice and kind males who go on dates.

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DR0832

10 years ago

Maybe they go on 1 or two dates but then get the nice guy card

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CupcakeCandyWolf

10 years ago

Not in my case. The moment someone decides to be an asshole im like "seeya!!!"

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bizgrower

10 years ago

I accidentally - lol - stumbled across Kezia Noble on YouTube.
(Actually, she was referenced in a copywriting thread
for killing it in the dating market. I can see why.)

Anyway, she covers this topic very well. She makes
the distinction between nice guys and good guys.

In her framework (we have to describe phenomena
somehow IMO), a nice guy is one she describes as
"boring, forgettable and easily replaceable." Ouch.

A good guy is not a rougue or bad boy, but he is
not "boring, forgettable, and easily replaceable."

And, yes (IMO) it a varies from person to person
and how mentally healthy or unhealthy people are.
I don't think it's healthy for a woman to like a
"bad boy" and hope she can "change" him or "save" him.
That's not the right kind of challenge to take on.

In a healthy attraction, I think it has to do with
survival of the species. I'd want a woman strong
enough to be a partner and carry on if something
happened to me. And, I reckon a woman wants
a guy who is a good "hunter" and can provide food and
shelter if they start having babies...

Dan

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thunderbird

10 years ago

A person has to be strong to be nice. Being nasty and negative is almost always an inferior response to life's situations.

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