My Directory Sales Flyer Needs A Good Headline, Can You Help?

by zoro
38 replies
I have built an online Restaurant Directory that will be promoted through several local hotels.

I am currently in the process of putting together a Sales Flyer to attract Paid Business Listings.

I've been wrecking my brain trying to come up with a good headline but am not sure if they will attract enough attention. Below is a couple:

" Want Your Restaurant Promoted In All Of These Local Hotels?"

"Want More Dinners? Put Your Restaurant In Front Of Hungry Hotel Guests"


If you have any suggestions or ideas, for a good catchy Headline that will attract paid listings to my Restaurant Directory, it will be much appreciated.
#directory #flyer #good #headline #sales
  • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
    Before the headline idea/sample,
    let's look at the buyer's perspective.

    He/she wants new and valuable information
    that can have an impact on the business.

    This will be seen as unbiased
    to be credible.

    Summary of [say 2] trends which
    affect a part of their business has been a proven
    door opener into bigger companies.

    The structure of the summary of the 2 trends is...

    1 Set up what they are doing is part of a big trend

    2 Set up the other trend that they are not part of.

    3 Set up what you have combines and connects those 2 trends
    so that they get a bigger payoff from what they are doing with the first trend.
    You are the only one who connects the two.

    4 Introduce some scarcity whether it be time or numbers.

    Keep each section only one or two sentences
    because you are keeping true to your word,
    trend summary.

    What this model does is not lead with your product
    or service because that's a turn off.

    This model sets up your product or service
    as the right choice because you have set yourself up
    with credible authority and high status BEFORE
    you present what it is you have.

    Now for the headline...

    Summary: 2 Dining Trends Affecting Australian Restaurants


    Best,
    Doctor E. Vile
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    • Profile picture of the author zoro
      Originally Posted by ewenmack View Post

      Before the headline idea/sample,
      let's look at the buyer's perspective.

      He/she wants new and valuable information
      that can have an impact on the business.

      This will seen as unbiased
      to be credible.

      3 Set up what you have combines and connects those 2 trends
      so that they get a bigger payoff from what they are doing with the first trend.

      Now for the headline...

      Summary: 2 Dining Trends Affecting Australian Restaurants


      Best,
      Doctor E. Vile
      Thanks for your great and constructive comment, it makes sense.

      For the Headline, because it's local, do you think using the word Local might be good?
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      • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
        Originally Posted by zoro View Post

        Thanks for your great and constructive comment, it makes sense.

        For the Headline, because it's local, do you think using the word Local might be good?
        If you want to be more local centric,
        Brisbane would be even more clear
        as to what you mean by local.

        Best,
        Doctor E. Vile
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        • Profile picture of the author zoro
          Originally Posted by ewenmack View Post

          If you want to be more local centric,
          Brisbane would be even more clear
          as to what you mean by local.

          Best,
          Doctor E. Vile
          So something like this?:

          "2 Dining Trends Affecting Brisbane Restaurants"

          1) Mobile
          2) Social

          I'm not sure where the Hotel Room Guests fit into the Headline or Sub Heading?
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          • Profile picture of the author savidge4
            Originally Posted by zoro View Post

            So something like this?:

            "2 Dining Trends Affecting Brisbane Restaurants"

            1) Mobile
            2) Social

            I'm not sure where the Hotel Room Guests fit into the Headline or Sub Heading?
            nope.. look at post #14 http://www.warriorforum.com/offline-...on-places.html


            The first group.. the local diners numbers are resending in recent years... and the reverse.. hotel occupancy is at an all time high. If hotel occupancy is at an all time high, then the average 2 meals per day per visitor ( 64% occupancy and 80% double occupancy ) becomes the growing trend and you just so happen to have a developed 8 hotel 300 room advertising avenue to reach these folks
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        • Profile picture of the author zoro
          Originally Posted by ewenmack View Post

          If you want to be more local centric,
          Brisbane would be even more clear
          as to what you mean by local.

          Best,
          Doctor E. Vile
          Because my Restaurant Directory is MOBILE and also SOCIAL (Facebook), should I perhaps have a Headline stating 3 Trends, or will that be too confusing?
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          • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
            Originally Posted by zoro View Post

            Because my Restaurant Directory is MOBILE and also SOCIAL (Facebook), should I perhaps have a Headline stating 3 Trends, or will that be too confusing?
            To get through to the buyers brain,
            2 trends works best in this situation, because...

            1 Contrast between what he has and what
            he doesn't have.

            2 It shows that it makes sense to hop on this other trend
            because it fits into his past decision making process.

            What he has is part of the trend and what he doesn't
            have is not part of the other trend.

            Not only can you get him onboard to
            the trend he is not on, this adds more
            juice to the one he is on.

            That is the goal of an ideal set up
            so it makes it easy to come aboard.

            Best,
            Doctor E. Vile
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            • Profile picture of the author zoro
              Originally Posted by ewenmack View Post

              To get through to the buyers brain,
              2 trends works best in this situation, because...

              1 Contrast between what he has and what
              he doesn't have.

              2 It shows that it makes sense to hop on this other trend
              because it fits into his past decision making process.

              What he has is part of the trend and what he doesn't
              have is not part of the other trend.

              Not only can you get him onboard to
              the trend he is not on, this adds more
              juice to the one he is on.

              That is the goal of an ideal set up
              so it makes it easy to come aboard.

              Best,
              Doctor E. Vile
              Thanks Mate. Your help is very much appreciated, even if you do follow the "All Blacks" ... lol.

              So, with your headline suggestion, should the Sub Heading provide the Facts of the headline statement?
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              • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
                Originally Posted by zoro View Post

                Thanks Mate. Your help is very much appreciated, even if you do follow the "All Blacks" ... lol.

                So, with your headline suggestion, should the Sub Heading provide the Facts of the headline statement?
                It would look like this...

                sub headline
                about trend 1

                sub headline
                about trend 2

                sub headline
                about this...
                Set up what you have combines and connects those 2 trends
                so that they get a bigger payoff from what they are doing with the first trend.
                You are the only one who connects the two.

                Sub headline
                about scarcity

                sub headline
                about your call to action

                Best,
                Doctor E. Vile
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    • Profile picture of the author savidge4
      Originally Posted by ewenmack View Post

      Summary: 2 Dining Trends Affecting Australian Restaurants

      Best,
      Doctor E. Vile

      And to think somewhere on one of those threads I actually give you the numbers to back up both of those trends. ( hint - one is decreasing and one is increasing )
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      • Profile picture of the author zoro
        Originally Posted by savidge4 View Post

        And to think somewhere on one of those threads I actually give you the numbers to back up both of those trends. ( hint - one is decreasing and one is increasing )
        Thanks Paul.

        I see it as 2 are increasing = Mobile + Facebook. I am not sure what is the decreasing trend?

        Also, are you refereing to this part of your post:
        ONCE you have a few hotels you want to directly approach close in proximity dining establishments and discuss the options for getting #1 on your directory, and #2 getting their establishment listed in those 64.1% booked rooms, that given the menu options and hours of operations can increase their PAIN POINT breakfast and lunch.

        As always I appreciate your suggestions and ideas.
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    • Profile picture of the author Oziboomer
      Originally Posted by ewenmack View Post

      Before the headline idea/sample,
      let's look at the buyer's perspective.....
      Sometimes...most times....



      Thanks Ewen for providing such ongoing value and education that I hope people notice because your perspective, resources and comments always provide benefits that make showing up here worthwhile.

      Thanks,

      Ozi
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      • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
        Originally Posted by Oziboomer View Post

        Sometimes...most times....



        Thanks Ewen for providing such ongoing value and education that I hope people notice because your perspective, resources and comments always provide benefits that make showing up here worthwhile.

        Thanks,

        Ozi
        Thank you Ozzy for taking the time to
        create the image and of course I thank
        you not only the comments, but also
        for your contributions.

        Gratefully,
        Doctor E. Vile
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  • Profile picture of the author zoro
    Ok thanks, how does this sub head look?

    * Your Business in Over 300 Brisbane Hotel Rooms

    * 42% of Restaurant Searches are from Mobile Phones

    * Launch Special: First 20 Restaurants Only. Free Listing in the Facebook Page Restaurant Directory.
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    • Profile picture of the author Freebiequeen1999
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      Ok thanks, how does this sub head look?

      * Your Business in Over 300 Brisbane Hotel Rooms

      * 42% of Restaurant Searches are from Mobile Phones

      * Launch Special: First 20 Restaurants Only. Free Listing in the Facebook Page Restaurant Directory.
      It sounds good but I am not sure about giving away 20 spaces free...of course they will do it but nothing from nothing is...nothing.

      Also - 300 hotel rooms...hopefully you will get more..I would not put a set number on a flyer, cause you have printing, graphic and sometimes set up charge....don't lock yourself into a number

      And offering the 20 free - that sort of looks desperate to me

      I would not even talk about price on a flyer...just stir up demand then let them call you - or call them = or walk in....and CLOSE..SHUT THE DOOR...CLOSE THEM

      Maybe you could offer the first 20 some extra special deal - "charter member"....
      Get in now - scarcity and exclusives are always a good hook

      you could offer one of each "genre" a special founders spot...one pizza, one steakhouse, one french etc....but of course sell others as you don't want to limit yourself

      20 spots for free nearby the hotels....where would you go from there?
      I hope you consider charging them
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    • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      Ok thanks, how does this sub head look?

      * Your Business in Over 300 Brisbane Hotel Rooms

      * 42% of Restaurant Searches are from Mobile Phones

      * Launch Special: First 20 Restaurants Only. Free Listing in the Facebook Page Restaurant Directory.
      No you haven't got it.

      Here's the problem we both face now.

      I've helped you this far.

      It's still not right.

      You'll keep coming back and asking if all
      the parts are right.

      I'll get frustrated because you aren't getting it.

      You'll get frustrated because I keep saying it's not right.

      And then we both have to look at is this fair use
      of my knowledge when I get paid good money
      to write the whole thing?

      Here's an example to paint a picture how hard it is
      for others to do things my way.

      I didn't have time to write an ad for a client.

      Gave him the blueprint for a copywriter, who I respect
      for his record, and got back the normal way to write,
      not my way.

      So I took over it and it produced 25k worth of client work
      in 3 days of running the ad.

      You can view your options open to you as being negative or positive.

      I think you know what they are.

      Best,
      Doctor E. Vile
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    • Profile picture of the author savidge4
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      Ok thanks, how does this sub head look?

      * Your Business in Over 300 Brisbane Hotel Rooms

      * 42% of Restaurant Searches are from Mobile Phones

      * Launch Special: First 20 Restaurants Only. Free Listing in the Facebook Page Restaurant Directory.
      I MIGHT mention a hotel by name if there is one worth mentioning.... MAYBE.. I would say more like "You Restaurant showcased in hotel rooms throughout Brisbane"

      How exactly is "Mobile Search" helping you? you have a facebook directory correct? unless something change in the last few hours... if I Google "Brisbane Restaurants" there isn't any facebook pages coming up

      You give as much as 1 listing away for free and I will dis-own you!

      you need to quantify the value of your service...

      The value is the "heads in the beds" as it is called in the industry. Its the folks staying in the hotel rooms. these are the people these local business' can not reach with their local targeted advertising.

      Your average business man comes into town mid afternoon. checks into his hotel.. and gets hungry.. there is your little flyer thing. he walks to the closest location and dines.

      Bill Sue and the 2 kids come in for the week end.. the kids are whiny and tired and they need to find a grilled cheese sandwich and fast... Hey... here is this handy little flyer right here.. and its right around the corner.

      It is entirely possible in both scenarios that either would have NOT been subject to any media based advertising apon arrival.

      YOU are that media. You are the bridge between the traffic they already are getting, and the potential to gain the transient traffic that is all around, that they don't know how to reach.
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      Success is an ACT not an idea
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  • Profile picture of the author zoro
    Originally Posted by Freebiequeen1999

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by zoro

    Ok thanks, how does this sub head look?

    * Your Business in Over 300 Brisbane Hotel Rooms

    * 42% of Restaurant Searches are from Mobile Phones

    * Launch Special: First 20 Restaurants Only. Free Listing in the Facebook Page Restaurant Directory.

    It sounds good but I am not sure about giving away 20 spaces free...of course they will do it but nothing from nothing is...nothing.

    Also - 300 hotel rooms...hopefully you will get more..I would not put a set number on a flyer, cause you have printing, graphic and sometimes set up charge....don't lock yourself into a number

    And offering the 20 free - that sort of looks desperate to me

    I would not even talk about price on a flyer...just stir up demand then let them call you - or call them = or walk in....and CLOSE..SHUT THE DOOR...CLOSE THEM

    Maybe you could offer the first 20 some extra special deal - "charter member"....
    Get in now - scarcity and exclusives are always a good hook

    you could offer one of each "genre" a special founders spot...one pizza, one steakhouse, one french etc....but of course sell others as you don't want to limit yourself

    20 spots for free nearby the hotels....where would you from there?
    I hope you consider charging them
    My reason for presenting them with a number of rooms (300) is because it sounds better than saying 8 hotels. I will be able to change out that number as more hotels come on board because I use my own desktop printer.

    Your suggestion of having a one off scarcity is good idea.

    I was also thinking put in a price that is broken down into days, ie "From as little as S1.60 per day"


    Posted from Warriorforum.com App for Android
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    • Profile picture of the author Celltactics
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      My reason for presenting them with a number of rooms (300) is because it sounds better than saying 8 hotels. I will be able to change out that number as more hotels come on board because I use my own desktop printer.

      Your suggestion of having a one off scarcity is good idea.

      I was also thinking put in a price that is broken down into days, ie "From as little as S1.60 per day"


      Posted from Warriorforum.com App for Android
      Why not just say "hundreds of beds"? As long as you are over 200 which you are, it's the truth. Save your specifics for the conversation. Even if you are printing these yourself, why waste the effort and money to change them every time a new hotel comes on board?

      And I'm with savidge. Nothing is free. If you don't put value in it, neither will your customers. If you must go cheap do this. Ask the restaurant what a typical ticket is in the dinner rush. Let's say it's $50 (it will likely be more unless youre selling to fast food). Tell the restaurant for the investment of one dinner receipt a month, you can be seen in hundreds of local hotel rooms. And charge them $50. Be willing to charge more if the price they quote is higher.
      Don't use the word cost, or price. Say investment because that's what they are doing, investing in you.
      Set your minimum price at say $29 or something for the coffee shops and fast food places. $29 is nothing.
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      • Profile picture of the author zoro
        Originally Posted by Celltactics View Post

        Why not just say "hundreds of beds"? As long as you are over 200 which you are, it's the truth. Save your specifics for the conversation. Even if you are printing these yourself, why waste the effort and money to change them every time a new hotel comes on board?

        And I'm with savidge. Nothing is free. If you don't put value in it, neither will your customers. If you must go cheap do this. Ask the restaurant what a typical ticket is in the dinner rush. Let's say it's $50 (it will likely be more unless youre selling to fast food). Tell the restaurant for the investment of one dinner receipt a month, you can be seen in hundreds of local hotel rooms. And charge them $50. Be willing to charge more if the price they quote is higher.
        Don't use the word cost, or price. Say investment because that's what they are doing, investing in you.
        Set your minimum price at say $29 or something for the coffee shops and fast food places. $29 is nothing.
        Yes, I agree. Sub Headline should be more general but still to the point.

        As for Free listings, No I will not give away Free listings. I might package it up with a discount if they buy more than one listing under another Cuisine Category.

        I have another thread HERE where I discuss more on the Hotels and Restaurants re the Directory.
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  • Profile picture of the author zoro
    Originally Posted by savidge4

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by zoro

    Ok thanks, how does this sub head look?

    * Your Business in Over 300 Brisbane Hotel Rooms

    * 42% of Restaurant Searches are from Mobile Phones

    * Launch Special: First 20 Restaurants Only. Free Listing in the Facebook Page Restaurant Directory.

    I MIGHT mention a hotel by name if there is one worth mentioning.... MAYBE.. I would say more like "You Restaurant showcased in hotel rooms throughout Brisbane"

    How exactly is "Mobile Search" helping you? you have a facebook directory correct? unless something change in the last few hours... if I Google "Brisbane Restaurants" there isn't any facebook pages coming up


    You give as much as 1 listing away for free and I will dis-own you!


    you need to quantify the value of your service...

    The value is the "heads in the beds" as it is called in the industry. Its the folks staying in the hotel rooms. these are the people these local business' can not reach with their local targeted advertising.

    Your average business man comes into town mid afternoon. checks into his hotel.. and gets hungry.. there is your little flyer thing. he walks to the closest location and dines.

    Bill Sue and the 2 kids come in for the week end.. the kids are whiny and tired and they need to find a grilled cheese sandwich and fast... Hey... here is this handy little flyer right here.. and its right around the corner.

    It is entirely possible in both scenarios that either would have NOT been subject to any media based advertising apon arrival.

    YOU are that media. You are the bridge between the traffic they already are getting, and the potential to gain the transient traffic that is all around, that they don't know how to reach.
    The directory is Mobile first and Facebook second. The in-room flyer has a QR Code and a URL for those who don't have a scanner.


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    • Profile picture of the author savidge4
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      The directory is Mobile first and Facebook second. The in-room flyer has a QR Code and a URL for those who don't have a scanner.


      Posted from Warriorforum.com App for Android

      Mobile as in App, or as in a mobile site, but not a desktop site anywhere?
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      Success is an ACT not an idea
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  • Profile picture of the author zoro
    Originally Posted by savidge4

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by zoro

    The directory is Mobile first and Facebook second. The in-room flyer has a QR Code and a URL for those who don't have a scanner.


    Posted from Warriorforum.com App for Android


    Mobile as in App, or as in a mobile site, but not a desktop site anywhere?
    Its a mobile website directory. It is fully responsive to iPads or Laptops, plus there is a dedicated Facebook Page which also shows the Direcrory as a FB App.


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  • Profile picture of the author Freebiequeen1999
    Zoro....while I see why you want the numbers.....I have done a lot of offline printing sales and I strongly discourage any biz from making a "statement" in print that might change immediately

    Print is "static"...you pay and have the design, the set up and the printing and you can not change it (why it is so important to proofread and proofread again)

    Online ads, banners, posts on social media, your website even can be quickly changed

    you have 300 beds..but what if you sign up a hotel tomorrow and it has 250 beds...now you have 550 beds...and your flyer shortchanges your efforts with it's unchangeable figures
    and....(hope not) what if you have a hotel pull out and now you are left with 240 beds? Now your flyer mis-represents and you have to scramble

    JMO - keep it fluid..."some of the finest hotels"...."the best hotels in xyz area"...."8 of the best hotels and more added every day"

    You can use the 300 *or whatever in fluid ads , emails, facebook etc JMO

    sell the sizzle not the steak.

    You do not have to quote a price - but please do NOT say free
    (I like free stuff - for me....and for years free affiliate stuff that pays me LOL...I don't like giving free stuff that doesn't bring me $$)
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    • Profile picture of the author zoro
      Originally Posted by Freebiequeen1999 View Post

      Zoro....while I see why you want the numbers.....I have done a lot of offline printing sales and I strongly discourage any biz from making a "statement" in print that might change immediately

      Print is "static"...you pay and have the design, the set up and the printing and you can not change it (why it is so important to proofread and proofread again)

      Online ads, banners, posts on social media, your website even can be quickly changed

      you have 300 beds..but what if you sign up a hotel tomorrow and it has 250 beds...now you have 550 beds...and your flyer shortchanges your efforts with it's unchangeable figures
      and....(hope not) what if you have a hotel pull out and now you are left with 240 beds? Now your flyer mis-represents and you have to scramble

      JMO - keep it fluid..."some of the finest hotels"...."the best hotels in xyz area"...."8 of the best hotels and more added every day"

      You can use the 300 *or whatever in fluid ads , emails, facebook etc JMO

      sell the sizzle not the steak.

      You do not have to quote a price - but please do NOT say free
      (I like free stuff - for me....and for years free affiliate stuff that pays me LOL...I don't like giving free stuff that doesn't bring me $$)
      Yes, I do understand, thank you for your great suggestions.

      I originally started this thread to try and get ideas for a good Headline and ewenmack has suggested a very good one.

      I will work on a couple of good Sub Headlines and welcome your ideas.
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  • Profile picture of the author zoro
    How about this as a Sub Headline:

    FOR RESTAURANTS & LOCAL BUSINESS WHO WANT TO BE SHOWCASED IN HUNDREDS OF BRISBANE ACCOMMODATION ROOMS

    What you think?
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    • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      How about this as a Sub Headline:

      FOR RESTAURANTS & LOCAL BUSINESS WHO WANT TO BE SHOWCASED IN HUNDREDS OF BRISBANE ACCOMMODATION ROOMS

      What you think?
      Nope.

      That headline structure where calling out who
      the message is for is redundant in your situation
      because you are putting the message in front of the right people.

      You really need a professional ad writer
      to get the job done RIGHT...
      or you'll continue to flail around in the dark.

      Unfortunately ad writers don't know how do a set
      up leading with 2 trends so you become the credible
      choice for action.

      The only one I do know is...

      Best,
      Doctor E. Vile
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    • Profile picture of the author DABK
      No.

      Why would they want to be showcased in accommodation rooms?

      Speak to that. I'm assuming they want that because they're ad would be seen by hundreds/thousands of people a month.

      I'll use me as an example, though I might not be your target audience.

      I want the right people to see my offers. I really don't care how and where they see it, if it gets enough of them to contact me, to buy from me.

      I really, truly, only care about $1 spent brings me more than $1 in revenue. The more above $1, the better. I'd put ads on the underside of my car for $10,000 if they brought me enough business. I'd put it on my neighbor's 70 year old, wrinkly and hairy ass, for that matter.



      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      How about this as a Sub Headline:

      FOR RESTAURANTS & LOCAL BUSINESS WHO WANT TO BE SHOWCASED IN HUNDREDS OF BRISBANE ACCOMMODATION ROOMS

      What you think?
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  • Profile picture of the author zoro
    Here's another one:

    Brisbane Hotels + Mobiles = Your Restaurant
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    • Profile picture of the author SashaLee
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      Here's another one:

      Brisbane Hotels + Mobiles = Your Restaurant
      Hi there,

      This is a little painful to watch.

      Why don't you just hire Ewen to do this for you and be done with it?

      In the time you've wasted here and in your own time coming up with these losing ideas you could have had Ewen draw up a winner for you.

      And you could have gone on to the next step of your business and made more money.

      Ewen's gone above and beyond with trying to help you and yet you still come back to the table asking for more.

      All the best,

      Sasha.
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      • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
        [QUOTE=SashaLee;10052181
        Ewen's gone above and beyond with trying to help you and yet you still come back to the table asking for more.

        All the best,

        Sasha.[/QUOTE]

        Thanks Sasha.

        It's been painful for me too.

        It ends now as I'm withdrawing all help.

        Best,
        Doctor E. Vile
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  • Profile picture of the author zoro
    Originally Posted by SashaLee

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by zoro

    Here's another one:

    Brisbane Hotels + Mobiles = Your Restaurant

    Hi there,

    This is a little painful to watch.

    Why don't you just hire Ewen to do this for you and be done with it?

    In the time you've wasted here and in your own time coming up with these losing ideas you could have had Ewen draw up a winner for you.

    And you could have gone on to the next step of your business and made more money.

    Ewen's gone above and beyond with trying to help you and yet you still come back to the table asking for more.

    All the best,

    Sasha.
    Excuse me, I never asked for more from anyone. I always appreciate his and other's ideas and suggestions.


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    • Profile picture of the author Jennifer Hutson
      Originally Posted by zoro View Post

      Excuse me, I never asked for more from anyone. I always appreciate his and other's ideas and suggestions.
      That's just it though. You're asking for unlimited free advice, ideas and revisions for nothing in return – from people who would normally charge an arm and a leg for those services.

      Would you go into a restaurant and ask for free sample after free sample and then expect to get a free filet mignon?

      People are willing to lead you in the right direction, but not spoonfeed you a home run. That's what clients pay the big bucks for.

      If you had put this thread in the copywriting section where it belongs, I can assure you that the copywriters there would have been far less polite.

      You got some great advice. If you can't do anything with it from here, it's better to hire an expert who can.
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      • Profile picture of the author Freebiequeen1999
        Originally Posted by Jennifer Hutson View Post

        That's just it though. You're asking for unlimited free advice, ideas and revisions for nothing in return - from people who would normally charge an arm and a leg for those services.

        Would you go into a restaurant and ask for free sample after free sample and then expect to get a free filet mignon?

        People are willing to lead you in the right direction, but not spoonfeed you a home run. That's what clients pay the big bucks for.

        If you had put this thread in the copywriting section where it belongs, I can assure you that the copywriters there would have been far less polite.

        You got some great advice. If you can't do anything with it from here, it's better to hire an expert who can.
        Of course...so many experts here...

        Hey if people don't want to give free advice just "ignore" ....people tell me to ignore the pushy shovy buy my "get rich schemers"....so can I say the same?

        You came over here just to yell at Zoro? what the?
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        • Profile picture of the author Jennifer Hutson
          Originally Posted by Freebiequeen1999 View Post

          Of course...so many experts here...

          Hey if people don't want to give free advice just "ignore" ....people tell me to ignore the pushy shovy buy my "get rich schemers"....so can I say the same?

          You came over here just to yell at Zoro? what the?
          You might want to grab a Webster's and look up the definition of "yell."

          Before you go criticizing the nature of what I wrote, perhaps you should dig through your own threads where you have been far less kind with your words than I just was.

          You obviously missed the point, among others. I only refer to a few people as experts on this forum and I would regard Ewen as one. I always enjoy reading his posts and think he offers some very smart words.

          He didn't have to continue helping, but he did. And the OP wasn't listening. Time is money. You can't keep going back and forth on a forum all day, especially when you're giving advice you normally charge for and it's not being listened to.
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          • Profile picture of the author Freebiequeen1999
            Originally Posted by Jennifer Hutson View Post

            You might want to grab a Webster's and look up the definition of "yell."

            Before you go criticizing the nature of what I wrote, perhaps you should dig through your own threads where you have been far less kind with your words than I just was.

            You obviously missed the point, among others. I only refer to a few people as experts on this forum and I would regard Ewen as one. I always enjoy reading his posts and think he offers some very smart words.

            He didn't have to continue helping, but he did. And the OP wasn't listening. Time is money. You can't keep going back and forth on a forum all day, especially when you're giving advice you normally charge for and it's not being listened to.
            Ewen could have just not answered right?



            Zoro was not trying to sell anything ...he asked for help...don't want to give help? then don't

            Yeah....I don't like those who make fake threads just to push whatever junk is in their sig this month LOL
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  • Profile picture of the author Freebiequeen1999
    Hi Zoro...
    sell the sizzle not the steak

    you are putting it in front of the right people...now you have to show them..."what is in it for them"

    basically in all sales the buyer wants to know...what's in it for me?

    more customers....fill empty seats, get business during the slow time
    (where I live we have seasonal slow downs - summer - for instance)

    I like the idea of "for the price of a meal".....

    $29 for coffee, yogurt, sub shops (no booze)

    and $49 or $59 for those with booze, ,,

    but you do not have to put that in the flyer - make the flyer go out and sell for you

    we used to say about a good flyer ....if the flyer had little legs and a mouth we would not need a salesperson haha

    make your flyer good....intrigue them



    Team up with the best local (Brisbane) Hotels -
    your menu in hundreds of rooms every day of the week

    Now you can get the power of social media and mobile for the price of your average meal ticket

    Grab your exclusive spot now with a special bonus for the first 20 restaurants

    Call xxx-xxx-xxxx for your bonus offer

    or something like that

    just some ideas for the whole flyer

    your graphics will be important also
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    • Profile picture of the author zoro
      Originally Posted by Freebiequeen1999 View Post

      Hi Zoro...
      sell the sizzle not the steak

      you are putting it in front of the right people...now you have to show them..."what is in it for them"

      basically in all sales the buyer wants to know...what's in it for me?

      more customers....fill empty seats, get business during the slow time
      (where I live we have seasonal slow downs - summer - for instance)

      I like the idea of "for the price of a meal".....

      $29 for coffee, yogurt, sub shops (no booze)

      and $49 or $59 for those with booze, ,,

      but you do not have to put that in the flyer - make the flyer go out and sell for you

      we used to say about a good flyer ....if the flyer had little legs and a mouth we would not need a salesperson haha

      make your flyer good....intrigue them



      Team up with the best local (Brisbane) Hotels -
      your menu in hundreds of rooms every day of the week

      Now you can get the power of social media and mobile for the price of your average meal ticket

      Grab your exclusive spot now with a special bonus for the first 20 restaurants

      Call xxx-xxx-xxxx for your bonus offer

      or something like that

      just some ideas for the whole flyer

      your graphics will be important also
      Thank you for your great suggestions, its much appreciated.

      You offer some me some very good ideas for both Headlines and Sub Headlines as well as providing me with good sales strategy ideas.

      My reason for posting this post was to ask for peoples ideas on and effective Headline for my flyer, you and others have provided much more, for which I'm grateful.
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