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Postcard marketing advertisement judge my ad

by Fitnessfreak158
25 replies
So with the new year coming up. I want to try something on one of my postcards i've never tried before a weight loss postcard to weight loss product buyers.

The postcard ad says.

DUMP THOSE 30 POUNDS!

I can't keep this product in stock. This is the biggest fat killer ever on the market. First 50 action takers get free online coaching!

Call Me Right Now. For More Information: Phone number

Thanks, Andrew

Please judge my ad this is basically an ad for product buyers i'm a rep for a health and wellness mlm

Also i don't have a website

I would much rather talk to them personally
#advertisement #judge #marketing #postcard
  • Profile picture of the author MartinBuckley
    Andrew,

    I think your ad need some work, but with that said when I read your ad what jumped out at me was your statement...

    I can’t keep this product in stock!

    When I read that first thing I thought was that's a great headline that sparks curiosity and would be a great simple headline to recruit reps under you to sell the weight loss product for you, so in this case here is what I would put on a drop card or post card ad...

    I CAN'T KEEP THIS PRODUCT IN STOCK!

    If your looking for a way to make extra money
    working for yourself, offering a product that's
    in high demand, please give me a call right now at:

    (000) 000-0000

    Andrew

    or something to this effect, I think you get the idea.

    I hope this helps!

    Martin
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  • Profile picture of the author eccj
    I can't remember ever hearing "I can't keep this product in stock."

    I can remember hearing "hurry before they are all gone" a thousand times.
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    • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
      Originally Posted by eccj View Post

      I can't remember ever hearing "I can't keep this product in stock."

      I can remember hearing "hurry before they are all gone" a thousand times.
      So should i change the wording?
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  • Profile picture of the author misterme
    See now, I'd read "I can't keep this product in stock" or "hurry before they are all gone" and think, if that's true about the demand then why are you spending money printing up postcards and incurring postage expenses advertising trying to sell it? And I'd call bullshit on you.

    Reminds me of years ago I used to buy a hotlist monthly and when I told the broker I was stopping he said, "I have a waiting list - once you stop you won't be able to get back in" and I replied, "well then what do you care, since you have that many people waiting to take my place?" and he said, and I quote: "homina homina ummm ummm."
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    • Profile picture of the author savidge4
      Scarcity is a beautiful thing when used correctly. And then the flip side is its down right obnoxious otherwise.

      A quick fact about weight loss products and this time of year. 50% of weight loss products for the year in total are sold from Late November through the end of January.

      In my opinion there is only one thing ( well 7 ) that is stronger in advertising than scarcity itself and that would be any one of the 7 deadly sins. Weight loss in particular can play into more than a few of these.

      This time of year in particular there is Gluttony. Holidays, good food, over indulgence, IE weight gain. the flip of that becomes Lust for a better self image, Envy of those that already look better, and in some cases Pride kicks in.

      Are you gaining weight this holiday season?
      Become the image of yourself that you have always wanted. Take pride in who you are and how you look. Become the Envy of your co-workers and friends.

      A special holiday gift for the first 50 people that call now ( phone number ) Not only will you get information on our incredible fat blasting product, you will also be included in our online coaching program ( a $500.00 value ) don't hesitate and call now ( phone number ) start the new year with a new you!
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      • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
        Originally Posted by savidge4 View Post

        Scarcity is a beautiful thing when used correctly. And then the flip side is its down right obnoxious otherwise.

        A quick fact about weight loss products and this time of year. 50% of weight loss products for the year in total are sold from Late November through the end of January.

        In my opinion there is only one thing ( well 7 ) that is stronger in advertising than scarcity itself and that would be any one of the 7 deadly sins. Weight loss in particular can play into more than a few of these.

        This time of year in particular there is Gluttony. Holidays, good food, over indulgence, IE weight gain. the flip of that becomes Lust for a better self image, Envy of those that already look better, and in some cases Pride kicks in.

        Are you gaining weight this holiday season?
        Become the image of yourself that you have always wanted. Take pride in who you are and how you look. Become the Envy of your co-workers and friends.

        A special holiday gift for the first 50 people that call now ( phone number ) Not only will you get information on our incredible fat blasting product, you will also be included in our online coaching program ( a $500.00 value ) don't hesitate and call now ( phone number ) start the new year with a new you!
        I love that may i use it and should i put a $500.00 value your's free?
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        • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
          Originally Posted by misterme View Post

          See now, I'd read "I can't keep this product in stock" or "hurry before they are all gone" and think, if that's true about the demand then why are you spending money printing up postcards and incurring postage expenses advertising trying to sell it? And I'd call bullshit on you.

          Originally Posted by dmaster555 View Post

          Yes because when demand is high, you should suddenly stop advertising.
          Not stop advertising, just don't base the claim on scarcity.

          But I disagree. Ads I see where the title reads "There is a line around the block!" (with a photo of a long line) or "I can't keep this product in stock" are proven productive headlines.

          What Misterme and Jack forget is that they are intelligent people, who understand marketing and advertising. Almost nobody outside the industry would make the connection. The people you sell to, would never make that connection.

          And I would suggest using the scarcity headline to advertise for distributors, not sell product at retail. One mediocre distributor is worth hundreds of product buyers. "I can't keep this product in stock" makes more sense if you are recruiting distributors.


          But to the OP. You need to build a website. Not having a website is like not having a phone. Any kid can build you a decent one for $50. The website builds credibility, it isn't for selling.
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          • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Not stop advertising, just don't base the claim on scarcity.

            But I disagree. Ads I see where the title reads "There is a line around the block!" (with a photo of a long line) or "I can't keep this product in stock" are proven productive headlines.

            What Misterme and Jack forget is that they are intelligent people, who understand marketing and advertising. Almost nobody outside the industry would make the connection. The people you sell to, would never make that connection.

            And I would suggest using the scarcity headline to advertise for distributors, not sell product at retail. One mediocre distributor is worth hundreds of product buyers. "I can't keep this product in stock" makes more sense if you are recruiting distributors.


            But to the OP. You need to build a website. Not having a website is like not having a phone. Any kid can build you a decent one for $50. The website builds credibility, it isn't for selling.

            Makes sense but i can't record presentations for my company which is stupid. So how do i create a website if i can't put a presentation up there for them to see what my company is about?
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            • Profile picture of the author Jack Gordon
              Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

              Makes sense but i can't record presentations for my company which is stupid. So how do i create a website if i can't put a presentation up there for them to see what my company is about?
              If you can't use the product name, that is unfortunate but not fatal. Spin in to your favor. Or, just be dead honest about it. If you present your reasons as credible, there is no reason that should be an obstacle.

              Selling something without naming it... you think you are the first person who has ever had to do that? This is the time to get creative and start working those benefits hard.

              Do it well and you'll not only having them calling you at the end, but begging you to buy.
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              Fifteen Lessons I have learned over 15 years and six businesses (or, My 1000th-Post Manifesto)
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              • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
                Originally Posted by Jack Gordon View Post

                If you can't use the product name, that is unfortunate but not fatal. Spin in to your favor. Or, just be dead honest about it. If you present your reasons as credible, there is no reason that should be an obstacle.

                The bigger challenge will be selling something without naming it. You think you are the first person who has ever had to do that? This is the time to get creative and start working those benefits hard.

                Do it well and you'll not only having them calling you at the end, but begging you to buy.
                Thanks but any suggestions on how to do that? or who to hire to do it?
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            • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
              Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

              Makes sense but i can't record presentations for my company which is stupid. So how do i create a website if i can't put a presentation up there for them to see what my company is about?

              Make the website about you, and your own small business.

              Tell the story about why people need your product. Build anticipation and demand.

              But either promote your business.... or your product. Mention both, but concentrate on one. Are you looking for retail sales or distributors?

              You don't need to use the company name or literature. But you can tell the same story.

              Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

              Thanks but any suggestions on how to do that? or who to hire to do it?
              I'm not the expert that Jack is, but I would go to several high ranking (on Google) websites that sell the same thing you do (I know, I know, your thing is unique...but the appeals are going to be the same.)

              Study the websites. Don't steal copy from them, but make the same appeals. Use layouts that appeal to you.
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              One Call Closing book https://www.amazon.com/One-Call-Clos...=1527788418&sr

              What if they're not stars? What if they are holes poked in the top of a container so we can breath?
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              • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
                Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

                Make the website about you, and your own small business.

                Tell the story about why people need your product. Build anticipation and demand.

                But either promote your business.... or your product. Mention both, but concentrate on one. Are you looking for retail sales or distributors?

                You don't need to use the company name or literature. But you can tell the same story.
                Retail sales more then reps right now
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        • Profile picture of the author savidge4
          Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

          I love that may i use it and should i put a $500.00 value your's free?

          Sure you can use it.... I would say you have to place the value of the online coaching in there. maybe not $500.00 but what is the value of the service provided?
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          • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
            Originally Posted by savidge4 View Post

            Sure you can use it.... I would say you have to place the value of the online coaching in there. maybe not $500.00 but what is the value of the service provided?
            Well my company is $29.00 to join plus products so like Total around $50.00 to $100.00 dollars.

            I was going to say $100.00 value i'm giving them free online coaching and support plus meal plans if they want them and doing contest which will include prize at the end.
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            • Profile picture of the author Jack Gordon
              Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

              I'm not the expert that Jack is...
              lol, Claude is a master at the slight/compliment. But you should listen to his words over just about anybody here.

              Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

              Well my company is $29.00 to join plus products so like Total around $50.00 to $100.00 dollars.

              I was going to say $100.00 value i'm giving them free online coaching and support plus meal plans if they want them and doing contest which will include prize at the end.
              Remember when I said to work those benefits? This is what I meant. Stack them up like there will be nothing left in your prize closet when this is over. Membership. Coaching. Special reports. Checklists. Free samples each month. Overnight delivery for $1. Back rubs. Whatever you can throw at people, just put it all out there and overwhelm them with value for the measly $29 they will pay. Make them feel stupid for even contemplating walking away from this deal.

              And if you want to throw scarcity in there (like Claude said, it is a great tool if you don't &%*@ it up...), then make them feel like if they don't take you up on this unbelievable offer today, they may never get another chance.
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              Fifteen Lessons I have learned over 15 years and six businesses (or, My 1000th-Post Manifesto)
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              • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
                Fitnessfreak158, can you tell us the depth of your understanding
                the problems, the fears, frustrations and words they use to voice them?

                That's where your pot of gold sits waiting.

                No amount of marketing and salesmanship can beat
                feeding back to them this understanding you have.

                Think about it, the best clients go to those
                who they believe understands their situation better than anybody else.

                Trust is passed on to you.

                They believe It's in their best interest
                when you make a recommendation.

                Comparison shopping stops.

                You are the only choice.

                You get the highest prices/fees.

                I've seen it work in the crowded weight loss/fitness/health/mercerize
                market.

                First you got to go deep, much deeper in understanding
                your market.

                Best,
                Doctor E. Vile
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            • Profile picture of the author savidge4
              Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

              Well my company is $29.00 to join plus products so like Total around $50.00 to $100.00 dollars.

              I was going to say $100.00 value i'm giving them free online coaching and support plus meal plans if they want them and doing contest which will include prize at the end.
              Meal plans alone are worth $50 a month in many cases. $50 x 12 is $600. support unto itself ( Jenny Craig ) can be in the $30 a month range $30 x 12 $360. DONT under estimate the value of what it is you are offering.

              Think of it this way... be it the business op or the product itself. you are NOT selling the product.. you are selling the service. Like most any product, is not the product that works, its the steps beyond the product itself that delivers the success.

              Your bus ops partners and your clients alike, their success will fall on your systems and support. Its not the magic little pill that losses the weight, its the right amount of water.. watching what you eat.. etc. The pill is a piece to the puzzle. the smallest piece at that.

              PS when you are discussing business opportunities, be careful with the "$29.00 to join plus products so like Total around $50.00 to $100.00 dollars." phrased that way it is technically against the law in the States. When joining an organization such as yours you are not required to buy product.
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              • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
                Some people have suggested using a name at the end of the postcard so people know what they are calling about,

                Should i use something like Thanks, Andrew personal health and wellness coach or a company name like Kick butt health and fitness company?

                Any suggestions?
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                • Profile picture of the author savidge4
                  Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

                  Some people have suggested using a name at the end of the postcard so people know what they are calling about,

                  Should i use something like Thanks, Andrew personal health and wellness coach or a company name like Kick butt health and fitness company?

                  Any suggestions?

                  Why not use both? Thanks, Andrew - Kick Butt Health and Fitness Co"
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                  Success is an ACT not an idea
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    • Profile picture of the author dmaster555
      Originally Posted by misterme View Post

      See now, I'd read "I can't keep this product in stock" or "hurry before they are all gone" and think, if that's true about the demand then why are you spending money printing up postcards and incurring postage expenses advertising trying to sell it? And I'd call bullshit on you.

      Reminds me of years ago I used to buy a hotlist monthly and when I told the broker I was stopping he said, "I have a waiting list - once you stop you won't be able to get back in" and I replied, "well then what do you care, since you have that many people waiting to take my place?" and he said, and I quote: "homina homina ummm ummm."

      Yes because when demand is high, you should suddenly stop advertising.
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      • Profile picture of the author DABK
        Yes, because if you tell people you are doing so great then send them an ad, they think: If you're doing so great why are you sending me this card?

        Many do think that way.
        Originally Posted by dmaster555 View Post

        Yes because when demand is high, you should suddenly stop advertising.
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    • Profile picture of the author Jack Gordon
      Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

      DUMP THOSE 30 POUNDS!

      I can’t keep this product in stock. This is the biggest fat killer ever on the market. First 50 action takers get free online coaching!

      Call Me Right Now. For More Information: Phone number

      Originally Posted by misterme View Post

      See now, I'd read "I can't keep this product in stock" or "hurry before they are all gone" and think, if that's true about the demand then why are you spending money printing up postcards and incurring postage expenses advertising trying to sell it? And I'd call bullshit on you.
      Strike one.

      I don't know if everyone would react that way, but I personally would have the same exact thought as misterme. It just doesn't pass the smell test, and I would immediately toss it because you have established yourself to me as untrustworthy.

      Extreme reaction? Not at all. I owe you nothing. You tried to impress and manipulate me with your marketing BS and it failed. I no longer have any desire to do business with someone I see as untrustworthy.


      Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

      Also i don't have a website

      I would much rather talk to them personally
      Strike two.

      Why on earth would you think they would be interested in talking to you personally? You have just subjected prospects who might have fallen for your gimmick to an incredibly invasive hoop to jump through.

      I don't care if you are the only one selling holy water. If I have to call you instead of doing at least my initial research online, I'll go drink some tap water thank you very much.

      ---------------------------------------------------
      Remember... marketing is not about what you want. It is about understanding what your prospect wants and making it incredibly easy for them to pay you to get it.
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      Fifteen Lessons I have learned over 15 years and six businesses (or, My 1000th-Post Manifesto)
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  • Profile picture of the author sweetcrabhoney18
    I get cards like this often ... I blame my love for candy but oh well.

    The ones that make me look on their website and research the company are the ones that seem professional... such as stating a company name vers some person's name. And also that provides something free that I can get. I enjoy that element because it makes me curious.

    With a person's name I instantly assume it's a direct sales company rep who just wants me to buy and then join the company.

    Have you asked any of your target market what they thought of the ad? That might aid you in determining if you are on the right track or off the path before you invest money.

    best of luck with your campaign .
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    keep moving forward

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    • Profile picture of the author Fitnessfreak158
      Originally Posted by sweetcrabhoney18 View Post

      I get cards like this often ... I blame my love for candy but oh well.

      The ones that make me look on their website and research the company are the ones that seem professional... such as stating a company name vers some person's name. And also that provides something free that I can get. I enjoy that element because it makes me curious.

      With a person's name I instantly assume it's a direct sales company rep who just wants me to buy and then join the company.

      Have you asked any of your target market what they thought of the ad? That might aid you in determining if you are on the right track or off the path before you invest money.

      best of luck with your campaign .
      Due to company policy we can not say the company name until we have talked to the prospect. Any Suggestions?
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      • Profile picture of the author Doran Peck
        Originally Posted by Fitnessfreak158 View Post

        Due to company policy we can not say the company name until we have talked to the prospect. Any Suggestions?
        That is a huge red flag.

        Your selling a bullsh*t product....there is no other reasonable explanation to why a company would NOT want their name out there.

        They made it company policy because when their name is mentioned people shut the door, hang up the phone, run the other direction.

        Id encourage you to find something else to sell.
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