Influence, The Psychology of Persuasion

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I am listening to a podcast (available on Youtube) with Michael Shermer interviewing Robert Cialdini, the author of Influence.

He just wrote a new edition of this best selling book. One of the top 5 books on selling. He's a Professor Emeritus of Psychology and Marketing.

Here is the interview...

#influence #persuasion #psychology
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  • Profile picture of the author Serene Carmen
    Thanks for sharing Claude. The original book is awesome. I'll also have a listen to the interview.
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  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    Thanks for the video Claude -- some amazing advice. I watched the whole video. : )
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

      Thanks for the video Claude -- some amazing advice. I watched the whole video. : )
      Jonathan; I read you post last night, when you mentioned PUA (Pick Up Artists).

      To me it's a repugnant idea....faking a personality to get a woman to sleep with you.

      But I have studied it. I've read several books by the leading instructors in the PUA community. (Weird that almost none of them ever got married). And watched a ton of video instruction.

      Why? Because the PUA strategies and techniques are pure marketing. In fact, a great way to study how marketing is applied to selling, is to study The Mystery Method, written by a PUA instructor.
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      • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        Jonathan; I read you post last night, when you mentioned PUA (Pick Up Artists).
        Hi Claude. Yeah, what I posted wasn't 100% accurate (IMO) so I decided to delete it.

        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        To me it's a repugnant idea....faking a personality to get a woman to sleep with you.
        Interesting: Although there may be many People doing that ― it's not the main "philosophy", if you like. For example Style/Neil Strauss' mantra is = "Become your best self." Mostly I think the PUA Community is all about a Person improving their social and attraction skills. Like you suggested though, some of it is a bit shady.

        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        But I have studied it. I've read several books by the leading instructors in the PUA community. (Weird that almost none of them ever got married). And watched a ton of video instruction.

        Why? Because the PUA strategies and techniques are pure marketing. In fact, a great way to study how marketing is applied to selling, is to study The Mystery Method, written by a PUA instructor.
        Cool. : ) I was briefly a Member of the Seduction Community ... However there are too many "weird" People and beliefs for my liking. Thanks for the advice of studying the materials though ― I think a Person can learn a lot from them. I would also recommend Entrepreneurs/Marketers signing up for for Eben Pagan/David DeAngelo's DoubleYourDating.com ... And be mindful of the marketing.
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        • Profile picture of the author Diego Aguirre
          Thanks for sharing, Influence is one book I have read in the past and I have to read again soon.
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        • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
          Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

          Mostly I think the PUA Community is all about a Person improving their social and attraction skills. Like you suggested though, some of it is a bit shady.
          I should clarify. I wasn't making a moral statement. The problem with selling the best version of yourself is that it cannot last.

          Being witty and funny is fine, if you are normally witty and funny. The problem is, once you get your goal (whatever that is), you will revert to being yourself.

          For example, if you are shy, but pretend that you are not...the girl is now attracted to a person that really isn't you. And that mask you wear will come down quickly, usually by the end of the first date.

          It's far better to be yourself completely, and you'll attract women that are truly compatible.

          My guess is that this is the reason that almost none of the PUA gurus are married at 50. They area attracting women that think they are dating someone else.

          Of course, if a PUA doesn't want anything past a one night stand, they can be whoever they like. It's only longer term that it matters.
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          One Call Closing book https://www.amazon.com/One-Call-Clos...=1527788418&sr

          "Be kind. For everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle".....Ian Maclaren
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          • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            I should clarify. I wasn't making a moral statement. The problem with selling the best version of yourself is that it cannot last.
            In one respect, that would be true ... However (IMO) it's not all about :"selling" anything -- it's literally about becoming the best version of yourself. And that includes developing the "social" and "attraction" skills to be more successful with women.

            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Being witty and funny is fine, if you are normally witty and funny. The problem is, once you get your goal (whatever that is), you will revert to being yourself.
            Understood. However, again, being "witty" and "funny" are Social Skills that can be learned and developed over time.

            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            IIt's far better to be yourself completely, and you'll attract women that are truly compatible
            In one part I agree, however a Woman often won't know "Yourself" -- your real self -- if you don't have the skills and confidence to meet them, Like I mentioned before, there are a lot of strange beliefs/teachings in The Seduction Community ... However, there are many good practices as well.
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            "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
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            • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
              Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

              In one part I agree, however a Woman often won't know "Yourself" -- your real self -- if you don't have the skills and confidence to meet them, Like I mentioned before, there are a lot of strange beliefs/teachings in The Seduction Community ... However, there are many good practices as well.
              Other than the pure transference of their techniques to marketing, the one thing I did find useful was that they would get you to "Hello", by giving you a plausible reason to start a conversation.

              If learning a few techniques to start a conversation gives you confidence, I'm all for it.
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              One Call Closing book https://www.amazon.com/One-Call-Clos...=1527788418&sr

              "Be kind. For everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle".....Ian Maclaren
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              • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
                Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

                Other than the pure transference of their techniques to marketing, the one thing I did find useful was that they would get you to "Hello", by giving you a plausible reason to start a conversation.

                If learning a few techniques to start a conversation gives you confidence, I'm all for it.
                Yeah, I think knowing what to do (and say) at every important part of the interaction can give People confidence. For example, when they know how to attract a woman, build comfort, kiss her, and get her number ... That makes everything simpler.

                Anyway, maybe to get this thread back on topic, one of the concepts of "Influence" that the Pickup Guys understand and use is that of "Social Proof." For Marketers (etc.) that could mean adding testimonials (etc.) to their Marketing. And, essentially, having a lot of People ― ideally "experts" ― talking about and recommending their product(s) and/or service(s).

                Thanks for the discussion Claude. : )
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  • Profile picture of the author SARubin
    Interesting. Unfortunately right now my ADHD won't allow me to sit through a 2 hour video, but I did bookmark it for later.

    Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

    He just wrote a new edition of this best selling book.
    Like you Claude, I read (or listen to) at least 50 or 60 books a year. The good ones I read more than once.
    On a side note, I found Robert Cialdinis book "Pre-suasion" incredibly insightful. If you haven't read it yet, I highly recommend it. You'll appreciate some of the clever sales stories.

    I've listened to the previous version of Influence 3 times and I might buy the new version, but before I do I have a question for you, Claude, or anyone else...

    Have you read the new edition yet?
    And if you have, what are your thoughts?

    Are there any new insights, or is it mostly just the same stuff repackaged for a new audience?
    .
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by SARubin View Post


      [/I] [/INDENT]I've listened to the previous version of Influence 3 times and I might buy the new version, but before I do I have a question for you, Claude, or anyone else...

      Have you read the new edition yet?
      And if you have, what are your thoughts?

      Are there any new insights, or is it mostly just the same stuff repackaged for a new audience?
      .
      I read Pre-suasion. I haven't read the newest edition of Influence. In the interview a few things were mentioned that lead me to believe that there was enough new material to read it again. I got the impression that it was written for the people that already read the first edition.

      The new book is sitting on my book shelf, waiting for me to get to it.
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      One Call Closing book https://www.amazon.com/One-Call-Clos...=1527788418&sr

      "Be kind. For everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle".....Ian Maclaren
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      • Profile picture of the author SARubin
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        I haven't read the newest edition of Influence. In the interview a few things were mentioned that lead me to believe that there was enough new material to read it again. I got the impression that it was written for the people that already read the first edition.

        The new book is sitting on my book shelf, waiting for me to get to it.
        Update: OK, so I went and got the new version of Influence, on audiobook.

        I'm about 3 hours into a 20 hour book, and near as I can tell it revolves around the same basic principles as the older version.
        • Reciprocity
        • Commitment / consistency
        • Social proof
        • Authority
        • Liking
        • Scarcity
        But there are some new stories, examples, and studies that have been added.

        Overall, I'd say it's worth the price of admission.

        And I believe you're right, Claude... this works best as a follow up to the original.
        Although, anyone who hasn't read the previous one will still get a lot out of this edition.
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