Email subject line advice

12 replies
Hi all,

I use this subject line for UK marketing, if I don't know the owner's/manager's name:

FAO manager - re: new customers (WATERBERRY CHIROPRACTOR)

Fictitious business name, obviously.

What would be a US translation of this - would it be, for example:

Attn: manager - re: new customers (WATERBERRY CHIROPRACTOR)

I.e., I've swapped out the "FAO" (which means For Attention Of) for "Attn". Is this correct?

And is "re" still the best thing here? It's short for "regarding" in the UK.

Thanks in advance.

Scott
#advice #email #line #subject
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  • Profile picture of the author DABK
    Correct.


    How is that subject line doing for you?


    I would not open your email with that subject line.


    Do Chiros open?


    Originally Posted by Scott Stevens View Post

    Hi all,

    I use this subject line for UK marketing, if I don't know the owner's/manager's name:

    FAO manager - re: new customers (WATERBERRY CHIROPRACTOR)

    Fictitious business name, obviously.

    What would be a US translation of this - would it be, for example:

    Attn: manager - re: new customers (WATERBERRY CHIROPRACTOR)

    I.e., I've swapped out the "FAO" (which means For Attention Of) for "Attn". Is this correct?

    And is "re" still the best thing here? It's short for "regarding" in the UK.

    Thanks in advance.

    Scott
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  • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
    Originally Posted by Scott Stevens View Post

    I use this subject line for UK marketing, if I don't know the owner's/manager's name:
    I can understand a letter being addressed that way, but most generic emails would just get deleted rather than redirected.

    It would be better to assume your email is addressed to the right person and concentrate on coming up with a subject line that at least gets it opened.
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    • Profile picture of the author Scott Stevens
      Hi, thanks for the reply.

      Actually, in the UK, it's getting me 20-30% opens in most markets - same for chiros.

      But after some initial testing in the US with the above equivalent, so far, it's about 12-15%. So definitely room for improvement.

      In your opinion, which bit about the subject line in particular puts you off?

      Thanks again.

      Originally Posted by DABK View Post

      Correct.

      How is that subject line doing for you?

      I would not open your email with that subject line.

      Do Chiros open?
      ----

      For sure, I've noticed about a 12% improvement in subject lines with the owner's name - in the UK.

      And do you have any feedback on how it could be improved for the US market? Obviously, testing is key.

      Thank you, Frank.

      Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

      I can understand a letter being addressed that way, but most generic emails would just get deleted rather than redirected.

      It would be better to assume your email is addressed to the right person and concentrate on coming up with a subject line that at least gets it opened.
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      Yours in prosperity,
      Skochy - The Musical Salesman

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      • Profile picture of the author DABK
        FAO manager - re: new customers (WATERBERRY CHIROPRACTOR)




        The FAO manager bugs me.


        I think, Hey, just Hey, would have better opening rates (in my case, 31% to 37%, depends on industry, but I have not done email marketing in a couple of years, so things may have changed.


        I also had similar open rates with a question mark at the end and no caps, as in
        could you use more clients?


        want a better mortgage loan?


        I had 50'sh open rates with receiver's name in it but nobody contacted me back.


        From the other examples, I got 40-50% of the people who opened to respond.



        Originally Posted by Scott Stevens View Post

        Hi, thanks for the reply.

        Actually, in the UK, it's getting me 20-30% opens in most markets - same for chiros.

        But after some initial testing in the US with the above equivalent, so far, it's about 12-15%. So definitely room for improvement.

        In your opinion, which bit about the subject line in particular puts you off?

        Thanks again.



        ----

        For sure, I've noticed about a 12% improvement in subject lines with the owner's name - in the UK.

        And do you have any feedback on how it could be improved for the US market? Obviously, testing is key.

        Thank you, Frank.
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        • Profile picture of the author Scott Stevens
          Thanks a million.

          Scott


          Originally Posted by DABK View Post

          FAO manager - re: new customers (WATERBERRY CHIROPRACTOR)




          The FAO manager bugs me.


          I think, Hey, just Hey, would have better opening rates (in my case, 31% to 37%, depends on industry, but I have not done email marketing in a couple of years, so things may have changed.


          I also had similar open rates with a question mark at the end and no caps, as in
          could you use more clients?


          want a better mortgage loan?


          I had 50'sh open rates with receiver's name in it but nobody contacted me back.


          From the other examples, I got 40-50% of the people who opened to respond.
          Signature

          Yours in prosperity,
          Skochy - The Musical Salesman

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  • Profile picture of the author Artes
    You just need to rotate your subject titles and thats it.
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    • Profile picture of the author DABK
      How on earth can that be it?

      Originally Posted by Artes View Post

      You just need to rotate your subject titles and thats it.
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  • Profile picture of the author Old Molases
    I think the subject line should always have the name of the person you are addressing to and the name of the business. But this is something that is working for me you should always A/B test to see what works best for you.
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    • Profile picture of the author DABK
      Why should it be that?

      There is no should, it is all testing.

      By the way, I open dozens of email messages from complete strangers who do not put my name in the subject line.

      I do not do it if they have my name in it: to me, putting my name in the subject line when you do not know me is a big sign that you are selling me something I do not want, or you are out to waste my time. I am sure I am not one of a kind.

      Originally Posted by Old Molases View Post

      I think the subject line should always have the name of the person you are addressing to and the name of the business. But this is something that is working for me you should always A/B test to see what works best for you.
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  • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
    Replace customers with patients as that's the term chiros
    and medical pros use
    otherwise you look like an outsider.

    Best,
    Ewen
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    • Profile picture of the author Scott Stevens
      Originally Posted by ewenmack View Post

      Replace customers with patients as that's the term chiros
      and medical pros use
      otherwise you look like an outsider.

      Best,
      Ewen
      Oh wow, really? That's good advice. I did some research and I thought chiros referred to them as patients.

      Appreciate the heads up. About to run a big campaign there, so that's good to know.

      Scott
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      Yours in prosperity,
      Skochy - The Musical Salesman

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  • You could try -


    Re - New Patients


    And if you can - indicate the "expected" numbers and timescales of their speedy arrivals - as they are more than keen to have their aches and pains alleviated.

    This should help grab a bit more attention.

    Something like...


    Up to 27 New Patients Urgently Asking For Your Treatment Now


    Anyway - however you craft it - if it compelling.

    It should find it's way to the right person.


    Or try and reach them directly.



    Steve
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