Have you tried emailing the more popular tool providers and requesting that they remove any information related to your website?

Hi in my opinion you can disallow all bots from crawling a site other than Google bot. This would stop links from showing in nearly all back link check tools on the market places.

Don't know if this will help you, but I came up with a method a few years ago that bans all spiders that don't obey robots.txt.

1. Create a page that adds the IP address of anyone who visits it to the DENY list (deny from X.X.X.X - optionally, you could do a redirect to another page instead of a deny if you want to tell them why)

2. Add that page to robots.txt as a disallow.

3. Create a hidden link to that ban page somewhere in your site's universal header (the closer to the top the better) and set its style to display:none;

Basically what this does is configure robots.txt to tell spiders NOT to go to the page that will ban them. Those who obey robots.txt will never follow that link and will be able to spider your site. But those that IGNORE robots.txt will scrape your site and follow that link, thus banning themselves from the site as soon as they hit that page.

@ronrule: Interesting thanks, lets see more guru's opinions.

You can block some of their robots in your robots.txt file, but unfortunately (or fortunately) there's always a way around stealing links from competitors. It's part of the game.