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Please critique my pitch page!

by MattSchoenherr
15 replies
  • WEB DESIGN
    • |
Hey folks,
Affiliate marketing neophyte here. Have been producing marketing assets over the years and decided it was finally time to put them all together and help a lot of people. I've studied some of the more popular pitch pages through Clickbank and think I have a fairly strong pitch page, but I've been staring at this for waaay too long and need some fresh eyes on it. Frankly, I'm AMAZED at how much work this entire process is. I had hoped to go live by October and here it is January. February is the new goal. sheesh.

THE SITE: MARKETINGIDEAS101.COM

Anyways, things I would like your feedback on:

1. Overall look and feel
2. Alignment of graphics (some are right-justified, some are left.. any feelings on it?)
3. Bonuses are sprinkled throughout. Usually they come at the end, it seems. Thoughts?
4. Font color of H1 headings.. blood red seems to be a trend, but I'm opting for dark gray.
5. Would I still need a video? Or were you able to make it to the bottom of the page without getting bored?
6. Any other ways to improve this page?

Thank you in advance!
Matt
#critique #page #pitch #review #review design
  • Profile picture of the author frenchsquared
    The is no link?

    The red headlines have proven to convert better. People don't buy on looks.
    Centered alignment converts better
    I like the idea of bonus throughout, seems like a way to keep there attention
    Video's have like a 300% better conversion rate.
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  • Profile picture of the author blogfreakz
    Hi Matt, it's better if you could post the link so we can have a better understanding on what you did.
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  • Profile picture of the author MattSchoenherr
    L.
    O.
    L.

    Important information! Thank you for the prompt!

    marketingideas101.com

    Thanks!
    Matt
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  • Profile picture of the author frenchsquared
    On page load.... nothing grabbed my attention.
    People don't read all the text, they only read the key words and make there decision.
    My eyes had no where to go... A red headline would not be as pretty, but it would haven gotten my attention.

    I think you should have a buy button higher up on the page.
    Took a long time to scroll down to find one.

    Took me a while to find the price.

    I have loaded the page, 3 times. Very quick looks, I know your product is $47 but I don't know what the product was? I know I can read and find it... but you dont want people to have to read. You need to grab the attention in that first second.
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  • Profile picture of the author kokopelli
    The site background image is a bit distracting ... to me - what does that have to do with the product, anyway?

    Also, too much copy before you get to the crux of the matter - the product and price.

    Just my 2 cents - good luck!
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    • Profile picture of the author Jim Guererro
      Matt,

      There have been other posts that mentioned no link to go too but then some posts actually find the link? Well my best critique at this point is to double check everything that you put out to people, especially links. Then also making sure that the links actually load up the correct page.
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  • Profile picture of the author kokopelli
    The site is marketingideas101.com
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  • Profile picture of the author MattSchoenherr
    Thank you, folks. kokopelli, thanks for reposting the link. Big boo-boo by me to not have it in the opening post for this thread. One of those head-slapping "I could have had a V8 moments."

    frenchsquared, what about a talking-head (mine) video introduction to greet the site viewer? Thoughts?
    Matt
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  • Profile picture of the author alexcercel
    Hi Matt,

    Static backgrounds are distracting and not so good for conversions.

    Titles need to be bigger and with red (not entirely, but atleast a few words of them).

    Too much white space. Make your site narrower or increase the size of the images.

    No testimonials?...

    Hope this helps,
    Alex
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  • Profile picture of the author KyleGolemMedia
    Matt,

    I would suggest you jazz the area above the fold up with a graphic or two. You really need to grab the attention of the reader. You will likely find yourself losing visitors before they scroll below the fold. Deter that with some eye candy!

    Other than that, you have a TON of content which is good. Anybody interested in spending 50 bucks impulsively shouldn't have a problem here. You seem to be offering a great service.

    Also, I wouldn't normally do this but I just launched my site today too and would love your feedback, Matt. I'm getting into the Mobile Website Design business and I'm currently doing a soft launch at WF. Your opinion would mean a lot! I've worked really hard on the site and the only response I got was a post count thief .

    Best of luck to you. I hope we both do well this year.

    Kyle
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  • Profile picture of the author tweakr
    When the page loaded up it didn't hit me as anything special. Try to find a different layout that doesn't look so generic (I mean it's a nice looking layout just not something fit for a sales page). Take to keep everything together as well, I'm not sure what water splashes have to do with marketing ideas, and I see from the posts above others don't know what the significance is either.

    Also as the others have mentioned take advantage of the space above the fold, grab your visitors with a headline or a graphic. You'll probably scare people away hitting them with all that text right away.

    As I scroll down the page I see you have more graphics, try getting more to mix in with that text though. A lot of information is good, but it really needs to be mixed (with visual aides) to get somebodies attention.
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  • Profile picture of the author MattSchoenherr
    Thank you Alex, Kyle and tweakr.

    Alex, I'll definitely work in some red and make the titles larger.

    Kyle, good thought to add some additional SOMETHING to the top of the page. I'll definitely give you a critique on your page. Congratulations on the (soft) launch!

    tweakr, point taken on bolstering that above-fold area.

    Thank you all for the tips!
    Matt
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  • Profile picture of the author gregsmith007
    it looks okay...
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  • Profile picture of the author MattSchoenherr
    Alright. So I've

    1. made the page more narrow and made the margins a little wider,
    2. created a new header for the top of the page that tells more at-a-glance about the site's offering,
    3. added some red (will work in more)

    My developer has been charged with lining things up better and adding some entries to the CSS, so the alignment issues you currently see should be squared away by tomorrow.

    I have my heart on keeping the watery fixed background for now, but I can still be swayed if others have compelling arguments against it.

    Thank you for the ideas, folks!
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  • Profile picture of the author MattSchoenherr
    Okay! Making some progress. Now, is there any benefit to replacing the text headers with graphic headers? (Just swapping out one font for another, right?)

    Also, any thoughts on the new header and introduction?

    Thank you for your sagacious opinions in advance!
    Matt
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