So my friend's sister left a hamster at his house for over a month. It was truly retarded. This stupid rodent was sitting in a cage eating, ****ting and biting people all day long and everyone in the house hated it.

After careful consideration of the circumstances, we decided that we'd give this stupid girl one day when she comes back to college and is in town again to pick up her hamster, and if not, that ****ing asshole is going up on Craigslist. As snake food.

So here's...