Register Advertise with usHelp Desk Today's Posts Search

Closed Thread
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Unread 21st Sep 2015, 11:48 AM   #1
Bryan Leek Jr.
 
Join Date: 2014
Location: Michigan, U.S.
Posts: 39
Thanks: 49
Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts
Default
"Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

I've just finished creating the salespage for my new product and I'd really like input from the warriors on how I did.

Here's the webpage: www.prozellerz.com

I want you guys to tear my website to shreds. Point out every little detail and flaw that you see. And it'd be real nice if you could also tell me the things to you liked about it too.

Any and all feedback is much appreciated and thanks in advance.
bleek7712 is offline  
Unread 21st Sep 2015, 12:07 PM   #2
Warrior Member
 
Join Date: 2015
Location: France
Posts: 18
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

Are you really needing help or are you fishing for potential "custormers"?
brieunier is offline  
Unread 21st Sep 2015, 12:33 PM   #3
Bryan Leek Jr.
 
Join Date: 2014
Location: Michigan, U.S.
Posts: 39
Thanks: 49
Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

Haha. No, I'm actually looking for quality feedback. I know I won't find many customers here. I've been working and reworking my sales page for some time now and I'm not sure if it's good or now. Every time I think I did a good job, I didn't... according to other warriors. lol
bleek7712 is offline  
Unread 21st Sep 2015, 05:25 PM   #4
Active Warrior
 
Join Date: 2015
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 41
Thanks: 1
Thanked 9 Times in 8 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

After reading over your sales page, my first impression is that you did a good job on it.

The only issue is...you'll need it to be GREAT to get conversions. Here's some input, for what it's worth:

1.) The headline should be more concise (stronger and shorter). Here is an example:

Quickly Discover How X Students Learned to Generate Over $3,300 Per Month Selling Easy-to-Make Products!


2.) The colors aren't really congruent. The variations of colors used don't necessarily work together to complement each other. I'd personally dump the red, orange and purple dividers, and just keep the gray and blues.

3.) The layout. I'd try to play around with at least 2-3 different templates or WP/html pages in order to find a layout that looks highly-polished and hard to ignore. The current layout is "okay," but try several others to find something that brings all aspects of your sales page into a cohesive unit. Of course, you'd need to test the sales pages side-by-side, because you never can tell if something will/won't convert highly, just by looking at it.

4.) The copy.
The current copy you have on the sales page is decent, and may convert depending on various factors, but it should be amped up several notches. I'd suggest a copy re-work from a skilled copywriter who understands the audience you are going after. The value of experience when it comes to weaving psychological tricks into phrases is priceless--you definitely want someone experienced in engaging an audience and getting them to act. Write different variations of copy, and test it all out.

5.) You counter should be moved downward. I think your headline should be at the top of the page. Your headline should get their attention first and foremost, and not distract them from proceeding to learn more of what the headline is leading into.

Before a visitor at LEAST views your video or reads the copy below the fold, you haven't established enough value in your offer to use fear of loss or urgency to get them to act. Try testing it under the video and see if that helps.

Finally..if you did this yourself AND wrote the copy yourself at 18 years of age? You did a great job!
AyiamDigital is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to AyiamDigital For This Useful Post:
Unread 21st Sep 2015, 10:59 PM   #5
Bryan Leek Jr.
 
Join Date: 2014
Location: Michigan, U.S.
Posts: 39
Thanks: 49
Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

Thanks for the feedback. I really appreciate it. I'll keep tweaking it to see what works best.
bleek7712 is offline  
Unread 22nd Sep 2015, 10:32 AM   #6
HyperActive Warrior
 
Join Date: 2015
Posts: 110
Thanks: 3
Thanked 67 Times in 40 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

Okie dokie... so here's my two cents, and you can take it or leave it as you will.

Your page reeks of the same stinky BS that the IM crowd is used to.
  1. Over-Hyped, Product-Focused Headline
  2. Beach Pictures
  3. Fake Sarcity Timer (even if it's not)
  4. $1,000s of Dollars Worth of 'Product' being Sold for $7
  5. Paypal Screenshots
  6. Same Promise of Every Single WSO/IM/MMO Product

What you have to understand is that the sophistication of the IM/MMO market has grown, and what you're doing is blending in. There's nothing that makes your solution/product any different.

If you take out your 'POD' statements and put in 'Product' instead, you'll realize that you can actually sell half the products on the forum with this template.

Nothing stands out. The market won't respond to the same messaging they see over and over again. Just my two cents.


Also, there's quite a bit of formatting edits:
http://www.evernote.com/l/AmV1-Joz18...KgrgBPKngXzeQ/
http://www.evernote.com/l/AmUR6qpKKg...xNiYEHfRXvefA/
http://www.evernote.com/l/AmUPeo-Qjm...1W3ph43Iro2EE/
http://www.evernote.com/l/AmWmow6HJK...TSo6Y6vIHyTxs/
http://www.evernote.com/l/AmVIghazUt...qItg-Tu1rX7Rg/
The Cypher is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to The Cypher For This Useful Post:
Unread 22nd Sep 2015, 11:43 AM   #7
HyperActive Warrior
War Room Member
 
club20coaching's Avatar
 
Join Date: 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 168
Thanks: 33
Thanked 23 Times in 21 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

I would say it could be an issue of the traffic. Where are you getting traffic from? Are you targeting the right people? Also are you sending them to a landing page first in order to continue to offer your products or services?

club20coaching is offline  
Unread 22nd Sep 2015, 06:22 PM   #8
Tyronne Ratcliff
War Room Member
 
tyronne78's Avatar
 
Join Date: 2011
Location: Longview,Texas
Posts: 1,222
Thanks: 439
Thanked 268 Times in 211 Posts
Blog Entries: 143
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

I think the headline should be in red. Tests have shown that headlines in red convert the best.

I would also shorten the length of your headline,I think it's too wordy and believe you can get your point across with fewer words.

Just my two cents...

~TR

tyronne78 is offline  
Unread 22nd Sep 2015, 06:33 PM   #9
Bryan Leek Jr.
 
Join Date: 2014
Location: Michigan, U.S.
Posts: 39
Thanks: 49
Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

I haven't started driving traffic yet. I'm still making sure the purchasing process is working correctly and that my auto-responder is ready.
bleek7712 is offline  
Unread 22nd Sep 2015, 06:38 PM   #10
Bryan Leek Jr.
 
Join Date: 2014
Location: Michigan, U.S.
Posts: 39
Thanks: 49
Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

And thanks cypher. I'm still working on that. You should have seen my first attempt at creating this salespage. haha. It was bad.

Thanks tyronne. I'll give the red headline a try after I start driving traffic and I'll definitely work on shortening the headline like you and AyiamDigital said.
bleek7712 is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to bleek7712 For This Useful Post:
Unread 23rd Sep 2015, 01:12 AM   #11
Warrior Member
 
Join Date: 2013
Posts: 5
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

Hey bleek. Here what you should do. Even though all the feedback was great, here is what I would do. Your really not going to know unless you track and optimize your page. You need to create at least 3 different sales pages. Use the great advice you have gotten in each one. And put them on a rotator And send traffic. Watch your clicks and conversations and pick the best converting one. You can also go way more in-depth but this will be a great start. If you need help let me know.
jeramiewinchell is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to jeramiewinchell For This Useful Post:
Unread 23rd Sep 2015, 08:04 PM   #12
Bryan Leek Jr.
 
Join Date: 2014
Location: Michigan, U.S.
Posts: 39
Thanks: 49
Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

Thanks jeramiewinchell. I'll give it a shot. I'm making alternative layouts for my site now.
bleek7712 is offline  
Unread 23rd Sep 2015, 08:06 PM   #13
Tyronne Ratcliff
War Room Member
 
tyronne78's Avatar
 
Join Date: 2011
Location: Longview,Texas
Posts: 1,222
Thanks: 439
Thanked 268 Times in 211 Posts
Blog Entries: 143
Default
Re: "Do I suck at making good sales pages?"
Share on: 
fb share twitter share gplus share more share

Good luck with your sales letter bleek7712!

tyronne78 is offline  
Closed Thread


Bookmarks

Tags
good, page, sales


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:47 AM.