Please critique my landing page

24 replies
  • CRO
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Hi all. I'm redesigning my landing page and I'm looking for feedback on it: Mandarin Tutor Test Landing Page

Please note none of the links work since this is just a redesign of my landing page (which is also my homepage). If you can kindly give me some feedback on this test landing page, that would be appreciated

Just a few things about my landing page redesign:

1) I don't have any customer testimonials yet but I know that's something I need to work on.

2) While my landing page is "usable" on phones and mini-tablets, I agree it could look better and more optimized for phones and mini-tablets (something I plan to do later).

Thanks!

Richard
#critique #landing #page
  • Profile picture of the author rusilja
    Nicely done Richard
    Although it looks good on first sight, it's up to the market to decide whether it's really good or not.

    Before you send any traffic, you should A/B test the headline and the green CTA button.
    I would also recommend adding a similar CTA at the bottom of the page.

    Cheers,
    Ilya
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    • Profile picture of the author richard888
      Originally Posted by rusilja View Post

      Nicely done Richard
      Although it looks good on first sight, it's up to the market to decide whether it's really good or not.

      Before you send any traffic, you should A/B test the headline and the green CTA button.
      I would also recommend adding a similar CTA at the bottom of the page.

      Cheers,
      Ilya
      Thanks rusilja! Yup, I'll definitely do some A/B testing when I have more visitors.

      I thought of a second CTA button - it's still on my mind. I'm not sure if that will offend potential customers because it seems I really want their business. But that's probably something I can A/B test when volume picks up on my site (I'm guessing some visitors may find a second CTA button a little offensive but if my overall conversion increases among all customers, it's worth it in the end, isn't it?).
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    • Profile picture of the author Hunter MI
      Glad some of my advice helped. I like both version of your last section, the screen shot and the updated version, over what you had before. But, i'd be interested in what other people have to say.

      I'm under the impression that this page doubles as a home page and when you click the CTA you would go to a landing page with a form on it. (Correct me if I'm wrong though).

      I do want to address what @JasonKanigan had to say though about the pop-ups...

      I would not, put a pop-up on your page based on scroll, time delay may even be worse with your video.

      Stuff like that could cause more people to bounce than it would help you capture leads on a landing page.

      Pop-ups based on scroll and time seem best suited for blogs.

      I'll try to find a case study on this at some point, or if Jason has one on why it would work for your site then by all means go for it.

      If you want to create a pop-up use it on exit only. SumoMe has a tool that will allow you to trigger a pop-up on exit that you should consider looking into if you want to give it a shot.

      To solve your students not showing up and the tutor getting pissed problem, i think you do want to collect your potential customers email.

      There is a way to have them add an event to their Google Calendar through email pretty easily I think. I'd suggest giving that a try, here's a link to how to do it: How to Insert Google Calendar, iCal & Outlook Event Invites Into Your Marketing Emails

      It's old though so I don't know how much has changed.
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      • Profile picture of the author Jason Kanigan
        Originally Posted by Hunter MI View Post

        Glad some of my advice helped. I like both version of your last section, the screen shot and the updated version, over what you had before. But, i'd be interested in what other people have to say.

        I'm under the impression that this page doubles as a home page and when you click the CTA you would go to a landing page with a form on it. (Correct me if I'm wrong though).

        I do want to address what @JasonKanigan had to say though about the pop-ups...

        I would not, put a pop-up on your page based on scroll, time delay may even be worse with your video.

        Stuff like that could cause more people to bounce than it would help you capture leads on a landing page.

        Pop-ups based on scroll and time seem best suited for blogs.

        I'll try to find a case study on this at some point, or if Jason has one on why it would work for your site then by all means go for it.

        If you want to create a pop-up use it on exit only. SumoMe has a tool that will allow you to trigger a pop-up on exit that you should consider looking into if you want to give it a shot.

        To solve your students not showing up and the tutor getting pissed problem, i think you do want to collect your potential customers email.

        There is a way to have them add an event to their Google Calendar through email pretty easily I think. I'd suggest giving that a try, here's a link to how to do it: How to Insert Google Calendar, iCal & Outlook Event Invites Into Your Marketing Emails

        It's old though so I don't know how much has changed.
        Well, I'll tell ya: I resisted putting popups on my sites literally for years.

        The moment I put them on, leads jumped up.

        And my marketer friends said the same thing as they convinced me to start using the popups: yes, people say they hate them; but yes, they work.

        Real data trumps what people say their preferences are.

        The exit popup is a good idea.
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  • Profile picture of the author getbread
    Like the colors. I am usually not a fan of sites that are so wide and with the info so spread out, but yours isn't bad.
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  • Profile picture of the author inhongdang
    Thanks rusilja! Yup, I'll definitely do some A/B testing when I have more visitors.
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  • Profile picture of the author Skorobogatko
    Hi! I like it! I would also add BuyButton at the bottom of the page
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  • Profile picture of the author savidge4
    overall not to bad. just curious, who exactly are you targeting? Americans? I might suggest instead of the green contrast color go with red. when most Americans think China - the color red is associated ( just a thought ).

    Another thing to look at is the Call to action itself. "Book a free trial today" is what you want the end user to do.. but the term "Book" is a bit more towards a buy term than a hey try me for free term? maybe something like "Schedule a free trial lesson now" may work a bit better for you. - a bit softer in the approach,and with the use of now vs today you are not allowing for - Ill come back later today and do this - you want them to do it "now"
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    • Profile picture of the author richard888
      Originally Posted by savidge4 View Post

      overall not to bad. just curious, who exactly are you targeting? Americans? I might suggest instead of the green contrast color go with red. when most Americans think China - the color red is associated ( just a thought ).

      Another thing to look at is the Call to action itself. "Book a free trial today" is what you want the end user to do.. but the term "Book" is a bit more towards a buy term than a hey try me for free term? maybe something like "Schedule a free trial lesson now" may work a bit better for you. - a bit softer in the approach,and with the use of now vs today you are not allowing for - Ill come back later today and do this - you want them to do it "now"
      Thanks savidge! Definitely agree with some of your points on the CTA. Unfortunately, the way my site works, it takes time for the tutor to confirm they are available for the free trial. Simply because customers can book 24/7 but my team of tutors is small and of course they sleep and may not be able to confirm they are available for the free trial right away so we can't give the customer a free trial on the spot (usually, the customer will set a free trial two days or more from the time of booking). Having said that, I can say "Schedule a free trial today." I think I thought of that before but "schedule" implies that the customer can get their trial "today" which would become problematic if the customer continues further and finds out they can't get their free trial today. After thinking of all the options, I ended up settling on "Book a Free Trial today" because it was short (width wise for the button) and customers won't feel I mislead them when they find out they need to wait for the tutor to respond before the free trial is confirmed. Now that you know there is a lag time between the booking and the actual free trial, if you have any other ideas for a better CTA, please let me know.

      Target is for English speaking countries such as US, UK, Australia, Canada, New Zealand, etc. Thanks for the advice - I definitely appreciate it!
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  • Profile picture of the author mytrafficjourney
    Nice colors.

    You might want to split test having the image of the lady pointing to the optin vs the video at about our services in the top left hand corner.

    Some written/video testimonials from clients will also go a long way.
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    • Profile picture of the author richard888
      Originally Posted by mytrafficjourney View Post

      Nice colors.

      You might want to split test having the image of the lady pointing to the optin vs the video at about our services in the top left hand corner.

      Some written/video testimonials from clients will also go a long way.
      Hmm, if I understand you correctly, you mean move the video to the top so it's above the fold and have the image of the lady on the left side while the video is on the right side? Yeah, that's definitely something I should A/B test when I get more traffic!.

      I noticed that some people register on my site for a free trial without even clicking on the video. Oddly enough, I always thought that customers that are interested and continue scrolling down would eventually get to the video and would naturally "play" the video if they are interested. What i found out is that there are some customers that seem to skip the video outright though and still register for the free trial anyways.

      Having said that, what matters in the end are conversions. If I end up getting a higher conversion rate from putting the video above the fold, then it's definitely worth it! This is definitely something worth A/B testing in the future when I get more traffic!

      You're also absolutely right about testimonials! That's something that I will work on down the road (getting a customer to do a video testimonial won't be easy but if I can pull it off, it will pay dividends).

      Thanks for the suggestions!
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  • Profile picture of the author savidge4
    Are you teaching Mandrin or Cantonese?
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    • Profile picture of the author richard888
      Originally Posted by savidge4 View Post

      Are you teaching Mandrin or Cantonese?
      Hi Savidge. I do not teach Mandarin or Cantonese. I am the owner of the website. I have other tutors on my site that help teach Mandarin and Cantonese via Skype. Cheers.
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      • Profile picture of the author savidge4
        Originally Posted by richard888 View Post

        Hi Savidge. I do not teach Mandarin or Cantonese. I am the owner of the website. I have other tutors on my site that help teach Mandarin and Cantonese via Skype. Cheers.

        the reason I asked this specifically was it is not indicated on your page. People will be looking to learn one or the other correct? It should be communicated on your page that you do have conversation specialist in both dialecs.
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        • Profile picture of the author richard888
          Originally Posted by savidge4 View Post

          the reason I asked this specifically was it is not indicated on your page. People will be looking to learn one or the other correct? It should be communicated on your page that you do have conversation specialist in both dialecs.
          Hi savidge4. That page is for customers learning Mandarin only. The header on the page specifically says "Take 1 on 1 lessons with a private Mandarin tutor on Skype." In the bulleted list below the header, the first bullet says "Learn Mandarin 1 on 1 with a personal tutor on Skype". I would hope that the people that arrive on my homepage only get the message that my website is mainly about learning Mandarin.

          I have a separate page for people that want to learn Cantonese but Cantonese is not a priority at the moment so I've buried my Cantonese landing page further in the menu.

          Did you get the impression from the test homepage that my website wasn't about teaching Mandarin? If so, that's not the message I want to send for the test homepage I made.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mehdib
    Seems like a clean desing, I believe in terms of CRO you have a good use of your hot first band property with action button for free trials. Maybe add a floating contact button on the side. I do not like the font you used though, too pointy and too big, it is as if you are preparing this for visually impaired people. Colours are good, and shows confidence, you can add a bit of Chinese flare somewhere though, maybe a bit of gold or red. I see these are not your brand color but to associate yourself with Mandarin speaking culture that would be beneficial. Good luck.
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  • Profile picture of the author Hunter MI
    Overall it’s a pretty nice design and I agree with other people in your color choices are nice.

    I like your current hero section. However, I would move the video up to the section underneath it.

    So for that section I'd include a benefit driven H2 3-4 of the bullets currently in the section and the video in split content section (video on the left, with bullets on the right).

    Your current last section with the 3 columns, comes across as a wall of text. I'd split up those paragraphs into at least 2 paragraphs a piece to make it easier to read.

    Then I'd add a new final section with a repeat call to action to "Book a free trial" as a lead into the cta I'd include another benefit driven H2 and sentence like the one you have in your hero section.
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    • Profile picture of the author richard888
      Originally Posted by Hunter MI View Post

      Overall it’s a pretty nice design and I agree with other people in your color choices are nice.

      I like your current hero section. However, I would move the video up to the section underneath it.

      So for that section I'd include a benefit driven H2 3-4 of the bullets currently in the section and the video in split content section (video on the left, with bullets on the right).

      Your current last section with the 3 columns, comes across as a wall of text. I'd split up those paragraphs into at least 2 paragraphs a piece to make it easier to read.

      Then I'd add a new final section with a repeat call to action to "Book a free trial" as a lead into the cta I'd include another benefit driven H2 and sentence like the one you have in your hero section.
      Thanks Hunter! Agree with many of your suggestions. I thought of listing the bullets next to the video in my original design. My design now is a "compromise" for desktop and mobile viewers - not the best design of course. It's better to have a design for desktop users and a separate design for mobile users. For desktop users, it absolutely makes more sense to have the bullets on the left and the video on the right side (I was worried for mobile users, the text would be too small if the video is placed on the right). So great advice there! I'll likely implement it when I do a separate desktop and mobile design!

      For the wall of text, did you view the page on a mobile device? (on mobile devices, because of the narrow width, I can see how the text stretches down too long and it amplifies the "wall of text" effect)

      I'm also thinking of the second CTA as you said at the very bottom. I'm wondering though, if some customers would find a second CTA too "try hard." Unfortunately, I don't get enough traffic on my site at the moment so I can do proper A/B testing (the volume of traffic is so low, I would not have any confidence in the A/B numbers). But what matters in the end is conversions so if I get more conversions even though the second CTA button offends some customers, the second CTA would be worth it. Do you know of any studies done on a second CTA button? I did a search on Google but could not find any relevant studies on how second CTA buttons impacted conversions.
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  • Profile picture of the author Hunter MI
    Glad I was able to confirm your original idea on the video and bullets.

    I viewed the page on desktop, the size of the font in those paragraphs coupled with the length really make it difficult for the eye to take a break.

    If you want to humor me on that I'd suggest trying the following:

    In the "Customize your Course" section, add a break before "In addition,..."
    In the "Travel & Survival Chinese" section, add a break before "Feel free..."
    In the "HSK Exam and Preparation" section, add a break before "We can also..."

    I can see in Google's developer tools that it looks like you tried to do that, but the table formatting is getting in the way.

    As for the second CTA this is the closest thing to a case study I could find: Call to Action Design | Landing Page Conversion Course | #LPOcourse

    Explaining the need for a CTA below the fold when the offer is complex. Because of the information on your page it's likely that someone will scroll all the way through the page, thus having a CTA at the bottom would give them the opportunity to click now instead of scrolling back to the top.

    Here are two more articles which mention repeating the main cta: https://blog.kissmetrics.com/c-o-n-v-e-r-t-s/
    101 Landing Page Optimization Tips

    I would also suggest checking out some of the videos Oli Garner has done on unbounce: All Episodes - The Landing Page Sessions - Unbounce

    They are pretty quick, but I'm pretty sure in one of those he talks about the second CTA. (I think it's inbetween ep. 6 and ep. 10)
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    • Profile picture of the author richard888
      Originally Posted by Hunter MI View Post

      Glad I was able to confirm your original idea on the video and bullets.

      I viewed the page on desktop, the size of the font in those paragraphs coupled with the length really make it difficult for the eye to take a break.

      If you want to humor me on that I'd suggest trying the following:

      In the "Customize your Course" section, add a break before "In addition,..."
      In the "Travel & Survival Chinese" section, add a break before "Feel free..."
      In the "HSK Exam and Preparation" section, add a break before "We can also..."

      I can see in Google's developer tools that it looks like you tried to do that, but the table formatting is getting in the way.

      As for the second CTA this is the closest thing to a case study I could find: Call to Action Design | Landing Page Conversion Course | #LPOcourse

      Explaining the need for a CTA below the fold when the offer is complex. Because of the information on your page it's likely that someone will scroll all the way through the page, thus having a CTA at the bottom would give them the opportunity to click now instead of scrolling back to the top.

      Here are two more articles which mention repeating the main cta: https://blog.kissmetrics.com/c-o-n-v-e-r-t-s/
      101 Landing Page Optimization Tips

      I would also suggest checking out some of the videos Oli Garner has done on unbounce: All Episodes - The Landing Page Sessions - Unbounce

      They are pretty quick, but I'm pretty sure in one of those he talks about the second CTA. (I think it's inbetween ep. 6 and ep. 10)

      Thanks Hunter! I read the articles you recommended and they were all good, especially the landingpage.com one and the KISS Metrics one! I also bookmarked the Oli Garner video link - I'll definitely go through the videos later when my schedule frees up.


      Also, I made the changes the "wall of text" part on the bottom of my homepage as you recommended. However, there's something that looks just a slight off. Here is the result on my desktop PC (1920x1080 resolution):






      I think it's because there is so little text sometimes in the second paragraph, it looks a little like the paragraph is too short. Anyways, I gave it some thought. I realized that the "title" above the wall of text actually contributes to the "wall of text" effect. So, I did two things:


      1) I put the title above the picture so it doesn't contribute to the "wall of text"
      2) I streamlined and shortened each paragraph by one sentence.


      I made the changes to my test homepage again and it looks much better: Mandarin Tutor test landing page.


      On mobile with the narrower resolution, there is still a little of "wall of text" effect but it's tolerable, at least when I viewed it on my IPhone 4s (960x640 resolution). Another possibility to get rid of the "wall of text" effect is to use bullet points since bullet points are easy to read - but since I already used bullet points right below my fold, my site may look a little awkward if I "overuse" bullet points, lol.


      As for the second CTA button, I read through the articles you recommended. After reading the articles, I then realized that a second CTA button makes sense the longer the page is because of course, you don't want to lose the customer if they scroll down to the bottom of a long page. I plan to add testimonials from customers (either by description or video) and below the testimonials, I should probably add the second CTA button.
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  • Profile picture of the author Jason Kanigan
    The Good:

    Clear purpose: I know why I'm here and who this is for, at least generally.

    CTA is above the fold.


    The Bad:

    No lead capture mechanism. You got the visitor to arrive at the page; now, if they do nothing, you lose that lead forever! Get a popup on there or an opt-in box to get them on your list instead of passively hoping they'll click your CTA button. Yes, popups are annoying; yes, they work. And I'm on the side of what works.

    General target market. What fluency level are you focusing on? ("Everyone" is not the right answer.)


    Instead of "Idea for beginner to advanced learners," how about examples of beginners vs advanced students and the kind of conversations they're having with the tutors? That way, visitors can self-select--"Hey, this is the level I'm at!"

    Overall, better design than most.
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    • Profile picture of the author richard888
      Thanks Jason for your comments!

      Originally Posted by Jason Kanigan View Post

      The Bad:

      No lead capture mechanism. You got the visitor to arrive at the page; now, if they do nothing, you lose that lead forever! Get a popup on there or an opt-in box to get them on your list instead of passively hoping they'll click your CTA button. Yes, popups are annoying; yes, they work. And I'm on the side of what works.
      Hmm, if popups are that effective, I can consider them. Maybe throw up the popup if the user scrolls 2/3 through the page? I wouldn't want to throw up the popup too early right when they first hit the homepage because personally, I find that really annoying and I tend to leave sites immediately.

      The other problem is, I have some potential customers that book a free trial but on the day of the free trial, they don't show up. This really pisses the tutor off because the tutor is on Skype waiting for somebody that doesn't show up. If I collect e-mail addresses via a popup and try to convert these people, wouldn't I end up increasing the number of these types of "flaky" customers that don't show up for the free trial?

      What about a second CTA button on the bottom of the page in lieu of a popup?

      (Sorry for asking all these questions about popups - I've never implemented them before so I'm quite new to popups and the process of "converting" people that submit their e-mail address through a popup).

      Originally Posted by Jason Kanigan View Post

      General target market. What fluency level are you focusing on? ("Everyone" is not the right answer.)

      Instead of "Idea for beginner to advanced learners," how about examples of beginners vs advanced students and the kind of conversations they're having with the tutors? That way, visitors can self-select--"Hey, this is the level I'm at!"
      I'm getting customers of different demographics now. From beginner to advanced learners, some business customers, and a few parents that want their children to learn Mandarin. I've had beginner, intermediate, and advanced learners purchase lessons before. Isn't Mandarin a narrow enough market segment? Are you suggesting that I should narrow the market segment even further and say, only target intermediate and advanced learners but not beginners?
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  • Profile picture of the author Jason Kanigan
    Use the popup with a time delay.

    I found the same thing with free coaching sessions bookings...if people don't commit anything, they tend not to show up. And yes, there you or your tutor is, sitting there waiting...real pain in the behind.

    Have a video for each (beginner & advanced) side by side, with appropriate headlines.
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  • Profile picture of the author Kobita Maruf
    I've created my Landing Page for an upcoming project and I would like you to critique it and let me know of any issues you feel could improve it. I'm looking for critiques on the two sections of text and the images. I still need to add the following items. Follow us links and emblems, Share us links and emblems, Demonstration video and Fix the subscribe form. Any critiques are good critiques.
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    How to get more views on Youtube video?

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