Help with television copy

7 replies
In the very near future (next week) my insurance agency will be producing two television commercials they will feature me in the ad as the spokesperson. This ad will run for 12 months on local TV and cable. Please remember I am an insurance agent not an advertising guru any help is greatly appreciated. Several years ago, my insurance agency had a jingle written and it has been used on radio and and television campagins.


For the past 35 years my office has represented insurance company name for auto, home, life and business insurance. The goal of my insurance agency is to help you to understand your insurance. We take the time to talk to you about different insurance coverage available to you. Full Tort. Limited Tort. Uninsured and underinsured coverage. We can help make sense of the options and what's best for YOU.

So, if you're tired of dealing with an inexperienced customer service rep in a different part of the country who has no idea where Northwest Pennsylvania is, call us for a quote, or stop by our office. My staff and I are waiting to help you.

Thank you again
#copy #television
  • Profile picture of the author DanielleLynnCopy
    Hi Sailerie, welcome to the Warrior forums

    Here's a small bit of help from me. Your commercial starts with: For the past 35 years my office has represented insurance company name for auto, home, life and business insurance.

    As a customer, I don't really care. I understand you're trying to establish you've been around for a while. There's better ways to do that. For example, combining the years you've been around with a benefit.

    Example:
    For 35 Years, We've Helped our Customers Find The Insurance That's Right For Them. And Now, We Want To Help You.

    Remember: If all else fails, ask yourself: What would interest my customer?

    Hope that helps
    Danielle
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    • Profile picture of the author sparkman
      Very well said.

      Always remember, whenever you say anything or make a claim in an ad, your audience is constantly saying: "What's in it for me?"
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      • Profile picture of the author Sailerie
        Danielle thank you very much for the helpful hint I truly appreciate both of your input. It makes sense to me the way you have suggested it be rewritten. And as Mr. Sparkman states, what I am trying to offer my customer is counseling on auto insurance questions that are applicable to Pennsylvania residents.
        Thank you again
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  • Profile picture of the author travlinguy
    With all due respect, your stuff sounds like a million and one other insurance agency ads. I think it was Dan Kennedy that said something like, the best advertising is direct response advertising because you can easliy measure your response and determine how much each lead or sale costs.

    With that in mind, why not use the spot to offer a free report for visiting your site? Hopefully, you have one. Then tailor your pitch toward the report (an informative and colorful PDF they can sign up for on the site and receive immediately after entering their info) on INFORMATION THEY ABSOLUTELY MUST HAVE if they're driving in Penn. Make it compelling and full of benefits.

    One benefit would be having the peace of mind they'll gain with your agency knowing that they now have ALL THE FACTS that your 35 years in the business has allowed you to gain. Another benefit is the client knowing that s/he has done everything humanly possible to _____. You fill in the blank playing on your wealth of experience, customer service, whatever...

    That's how I'd roll. Good luck!
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    • Profile picture of the author David Babineau
      Hi Sailerie,

      You've received some really good feedback already, here are a few other things to consider...

      * "The goal of my insurance agency is to help you to understand your insurance."

      Is this a major pain point for your customers? Do they really care? My gut says they want to have good coverage at good prices. Highly unlikely that the possibility of "understanding their insurance coverage better" will be enough to make them change to your agency...

      * Agree with Danielle regarding yoru start. You have a sentence later on that would probably be a better opener (modified slightly):

      "Are you tired of dealing with an insurance company that doesn't understand your needs, let alone knows where the heck Northwest Pennsylvania is?!"

      Another idea: could you start with a quick audio clip of what the typical treatment is when people call in to the big agencies (call hold hell, maybe even a clip of someone talking that can't be understood, etc.) then you say something like:

      "Customer service for your claim isn't an issue before you really need it" and go on to say that you've been there for 35 years, you're real people etc, etc.

      * Why not say your name in the script?

      * What is "tort"? Not sure if this is because I'm Canadian originally but right there I'm confused and click, gone to another channel

      * Regarding your marketing plan... 12 months huh? Any way you can test it on a much shorter time period, that way if your ad bombs you can change it up and not waste money for a year...

      * The report idea is good. If not, I did not notice any contact info (just stop by our office.) At the very minimum say where your office is located. (Why not ask them to call yoru office, much more likely than something remembering to stop by your office.) And also, you have no offer. Free report. Free quote, etc. Give people a reason to call your office TODAY.


      Cheers,
      D
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  • Profile picture of the author Bruce Wedding
    Originally Posted by Sailerie View Post

    In the very near future (next week) my insurance agency will be producing two television commercials they will feature me in the ad as the spokesperson. This ad will run for 12 months on local TV and cable. Please remember I am an insurance agent not an advertising guru any help is greatly appreciated. Several years ago, my insurance agency had a jingle written and it has been used on radio and and television campagins.


    For the past 35 years my office has represented insurance company name for auto, home, life and business insurance. The goal of my insurance agency is to help you to understand your insurance. We take the time to talk to you about different insurance coverage available to you. Full Tort. Limited Tort. Uninsured and underinsured coverage. We can help make sense of the options and what's best for YOU.

    So, if you're tired of dealing with an inexperienced customer service rep in a different part of the country who has no idea where Northwest Pennsylvania is, call us for a quote, or stop by our office. My staff and I are waiting to help you.

    Thank you again
    Hi Sailerie,

    I loved you in Amadeus

    You've gotten some great advice here. I think this spot could be dramatically improved.

    Obviously, you don't have time in a 30 second spot to do much selling. In the CPA world, with banner ads and text links, we say, "Sell the click!"

    That's all you are trying to do here, sell the call. Every word should be pushing the client towards calling you. Forget all this "in business 35 years stuff" and explaining insurance stuff. They don't care and while insurance may be your passion, the thought of someone explaining it to me makes a root canal sound appealing. Remember, you are not your audience. We see insurance as a necessary evil and nothing more.

    The best way to get the call is to give them a free prize. Someone suggested a free report. That's heading in the right direction. Start listening to all the direct response ads on the radio and TV. They're either giving free information or free trials. Nobody is ever selling directly. The reason why is, there's not enough time.

    Ok, the twist I'd add is to give this report a strong hook. What I mean is, something valuable or controversial or secretive. For example off the top of my head, "The 7 Things You Must Know Before Buying Insurance" or "5 Secrets your Insurance Agent Hopes You Never Find Out" or "Underinsured Catastrophies: Are You Next?"

    Get the idea? Give me something I WANT to read. And in the report, AFTER you deliver what you promised in an easy to read, interesting manner, give them the sales pitch to call your office.

    Now lastly, and this is a real gem...

    People HATE calling other people they don't know and they're afraid of sales pitches. What I would suggest is to setup an answering machine (or there are services to do this online) and test is this call to action:

    "To get your free no-obligation copy of "report name here" today, call 555-1234 and leave your name and address on the answering machine and we will mail it to you the next day."

    Good luck,
    Bruce
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  • Profile picture of the author lconsult
    Whether it is IM or a TV commercial, the same message needs to be conveyed.

    I suggest using a marketing template like David Frey's 12-Step Foolproof Sales Letter Template as a guide.

    When doing any type of marketing campaign, we use David's 12 steps as our master starting point.

    Sure, in a 30 second commercial you are limited; however, by using a template like David's, you can make sure that whatever steps you choose to convey in this commercial are not left out and, more importantly, presented to the customer in the right order. The order is very important!

    David's website is marketingbestpractices.com.

    Good luck!
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