Short & Sharp

travlinguy

16 years ago

How about, "Dyslexic atheist says he’s never believed in Dog."

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RickDuris

16 years ago

Originally Posted by Metronicity

Ernest Hemingway was once challenged to write a complete story in six words. He wrote - "For sale: baby shoes, never used."

I'm wondering if this could be applied to headlines.

Like - "For Sale: Marketers Brain, Never Used"

That's pretty tame. I'm sure you can do better.

I think that's the whole concept behind Twitter.

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mmzcreates 16 years ago

Originally Posted by RickDuris

I think that's the whole concept behind Twitter.

I would agree Twitter is the same concept.
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The Copy Nazi Banned 16 years ago

Originally Posted by RickDuris

I think that's the whole concept behind Twitter.

Close. But we're talking 6 words here. And the average length of an English word is 4.5 characters. So lets say you have an average number of 27 characters. Whereas Twitter allows up to 140 characters. Like I said - "short & sharp".
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copyassassin 16 years ago

Originally Posted by RickDuris

I think that's the whole concept behind Twitter.

Gotta include Adwords, as well. Close to the same number of characters as twitter. (105 vs 140)

Headline - 25 characters
Line 1 - 35 characters
Line 2 - 35 characters
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Iconik

16 years ago

For Sale: Robert Collier Letter Book, read once.

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Tinkerbell

16 years ago

I came, I saw, I conquered.

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MikeHumphreys 16 years ago

I think this one was from the late Gary Halbert:

"SEX!

Now That I Have Your Attention..."
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- The Copy Nazi Banned 16 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by MikeHumphreys
  
  I think this one was from the late Gary Halbert:
  
  "SEX!
  
  Now That I Have Your Attention..."
  
  Yes - but it's 7 words. :p
  
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  1 reply
  
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  DCromwell 16 years ago
  
  "Need Doomsday robots? Buy our lasers"
  
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The Copy Nazi Banned 16 years ago

Originally Posted by Tinkerbell

I came, I saw, I conquered.

Which can be shortened even further to its original Latin - Veni, vidi, vici

It's also the motto for Philip Morris -

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Ph...orris_logo.jpg
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mccflo99

16 years ago

This one time, at band camp...

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DougBarger

16 years ago

Parachute for Sale: Only Used Once, (Never Opened)

(Courtesy of warrior Matt Pickstone)

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The Copy Nazi

Banned 16 years ago

Originally Posted by DougBarger

Parachute for Sale: Only Used Once, (Never Opened)

(Courtesy of warrior Matt Pickstone)

Not bad - but 8 words if you include what's in brackets. But I like it.

There's still a story there - as in, took the jump but scared him(her)self stupid so never did it again.

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DougBarger

16 years ago

Originally Posted by Metronicity

Not bad - but 8 words if you include what's in brackets. But I like it.

There's still a story there - as in, took the jump but scared him(her)self stupid so never did it again.

Yeah, I tried to trim it down to 6 words, but I'm no Hemingway.

It actually had 2 more words: (small stain.)

Apparently the previous owner didn't mind the jump as much as the

landing

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maximus242

16 years ago

Found: 2 Bodies, 1 Head, Chainsaw

Painting For Sale, Name Mona Lisa

Hovering Disk Spotted, 8 People Missing

Good thread metro, gets the mind working

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Mr. Subtle 16 years ago

I started a 6-word story thread years ago on Michel Fortin's copywriting board...

.
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- Ken Strong 16 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Mr. Subtle
  
  Who you callin' a pink thithy?
  
  Oh, sorry, never mind... dyslexia kicking in there for a moment.
  
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Daniel Sanchez

16 years ago

Boyfriend gone? Win him back today!

Or

Test tube vampire baby slaughters puppies!!!

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balsimon 16 years ago

I QUIT! FIND OUT WHY. $5
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Kevin-VirtualProfitCenter

16 years ago

"Hard Earner is Now Easy Earner" - Advertorial based opp-seeker copy

"Housewife's Secret to Marital Intimacy" - Women's sexual technique book

"Keep Her Begging for More" - Men's sexual technique book

"30 Pounds in 30 Days Secret" - weight loss

"The Simple Dow-Jones Dominating Secret" - forex

"Stop Kids Talking Back NOW" - assertive discipline book

"Rekindle the Passion" - sexual techniques for couples

"Stop Divorce and Win Him Back" - marital rescue book

"The Revolutionary 47 mpg Truck" - miracle gas additive advertorial

"Be the Hero of Your Family" - beats me

"Longer, Harder Manhood in 30 Days" - this is for Mal

"Learn PHP in a Weekend" - php lesson manual laid out in 15 1 hour lessons

"90 Days to a Beach Body" - workout book

"The Vacation of a Lifetime" - all inclusive resort

"Leave Your Wallet at Home" - all inclusive resort

Thanks for the workout Mal. This is good practice.

Edit: OK, I just went back and read the "assignment" again. Not headlines, stories. OK, so it's before 6am here and I missed it. Still was good for my soul. Want a six word story? Here it is:

Foggy head; went back to bed.

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Rezbi

16 years ago

Grow 10 inches in two days

I'm referring to flowers, or course.

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DCromwell 16 years ago

Originally Posted by Rezbi

Grow 10 inches in two days

I'm referring to flowers, or course.

You almost sold me. I've always wanted bigger shoes - this is why I don't like hype
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- Rezbi 16 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by DCromwell
  
  You almost sold me. I've always wanted bigger shoes - this is why I don't like hype
  
  Hey, don't have a go at me, mate, bigger shoes shouldn't be a problem.
  
  Feet, on the other hand, would be if you don't already have them.
  
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balsimon

16 years ago

Found your brain in casket. $5

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The Copy Nazi

Banned 16 years ago

I just discovered there's a whole site devoted to this concept - Six Word Stories

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tun80

16 years ago

"Narcoleptic For Hire - Flexible Hours Only"

"Found: Explorer Compass - Owner Believed Missing"

"Sale: Russian Roulette Revolver - Fired Once"

"Wanted: Getaway Driving - Own Car Essential"

"Durex Condom For Sale - Used Once"

"For Sale: Baby - From Loving Home"

"Personal Trainer For Hire - Well Hung"

"Wanted: Cleaner for Incontinent Food Critic"

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perryny 16 years ago

IM is too hard. I quit.

(I wrote this story many times in the past several months before tossing it in the wastebasket over and over again. It just never seemed believable enough to publish.)
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mccflo99

16 years ago

Used Car; Lemon, Salesman; Bad Apple

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mccflo99

16 years ago

I thrive on writing responsive copy.

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MontelloMarketing

16 years ago

One Sentence - True stories, told in one sentence. is a site that allows people to tell entire stories in one sentence.

Not exactly like short headline writing but...

Very interesting if you're looking for ways to tell stories in sales letters in a concise way.

Granted... much of what's posted there... sucks. And more than a few aren't one sentence stories, rather five or six sentence stories thrown into one long run on sentence.

But here are a few neat little packages I found...

"After surfing dozens of porn sites and downloading thousands of songs illegally, I finally got a virus on my laptop from a website containing quotes from the Bible." (Even comes with an unspoken moral to the story.)

"While my dad told us not to throw any more rocks in the creek, I launched my last big one over my brother's head as he stood up." (Leaves the big third act to your imagination, but still...)

"The hardest thing was driving to the funeral alone." (Definitely a whole story in that)

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The Copy Nazi

Banned 16 years ago

Originally Posted by MontelloMarketing

One Sentence - True stories, told in one sentence. is a site that allows people to tell entire stories in one sentence.

Not exactly like short headline writing but...

Very interesting if you're looking for ways to tell stories in sales letters in a concise way.

Granted... much of what's posted there... sucks. And more than a few aren't one sentence stories, rather five or six sentence stories thrown into one long run on sentence.

But here are a few neat little packages I found...

"After surfing dozens of porn sites and downloading thousands of songs illegally, I finally got a virus on my laptop from a website containing quotes from the Bible." (Even comes with an unspoken moral to the story.)

"While my dad told us not to throw any more rocks in the creek, I launched my last big one over my brother's head as he stood up." (Leaves the big third act to your imagination, but still...)

"The hardest thing was driving to the funeral alone." (Definitely a whole story in that)

There's some beauties amongst that lot. Really good.

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balsimon

16 years ago

New genie - you 3 wishes: $5

(my wish? 7 words)

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Short & Sharp

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