Talk Me Down Please

by Zanti

Posted: 14 years ago 31 replies

INTERNET MARKETING

OK. I give up, because I really don't get it.

Maybe it's just me and someone can tell me the errors of my ways.

I started posting this thread as a post in another thread, and then it hit me, no, I'm seeing so much of this that I can't understand why it keeps happening.

I am confused about this... Threads started by someone seeking help or advice and the OP seems really sincere. So, many people believe the OP and do what we generally do here and try to either help or encourage (with a couple of recent exceptions) the OP.

Then someone shares information that, at least for me brings into questions the honorable motives of the OP. (I have a big thing for being honest.)

Now this is what further confuses me, and I'm seeing it over and over in threads... After specific information is shared about the OP, information that anyone can easily check-out by clicking the OP's avatar or just doing some simple research. It becomes pretty clear that the OP is not being honest or is intentionally or unintentionally, leaving certain pieces of information out of the OP.

And yet there is still post after post that don't seem to either notice or care.

Maybe I'm wrong here; I get helping someone out. I think that is what WF is really all about, but I also expect, no I shouldn't say expect, that just gets me in trouble. I presume, that when those who are asking for help or whatever they are seeking, are sharing something that is truthful and not playing games.

Is it superior marketing or copy-writing that causes people to just buy into the title and first post of a thread and not read the subsequent posts and try to be helpful.

Or are some posters just trying to get their opinions out for others to see and help to establish a good reputation.

I know there are some who want to increase post cost or have a sig viewed. That's not what I'm talking about. There are some with hundreds and thousands of post who I see doing what I'm talking about.

Or could it be something commendable and posters know that the OP is a farce but there are others who may really be in need of similar help and do what they can to help.

Or is it just being lazy?

In a recent thread the OP even verbally attacked a thoughtful post of help and yet there were more post after offering more help. And I have to assume that they didn't read the attacking post or the one with the contrary information of the OP.

I don't know, sometimes some threads just need to die.

Maybe I just need to be talked down.

I see and know so many posters who genuinely want to help.

If you're new to IM (or not) and have questions, problems or just need encouragement and motivation, just be honest with what you're asking and I'm sure you'll get it here.

There are no dumb questions if they're real.

Brian

Irie to the highest - Respect

Brian

#talk

rosetrees 14 years ago

I'm a bit confused about what you are saying - but I think it's this:

Sometimes an OP is found not to be quite who/what he/she claims. Someone in the thread raises the issue, but subsequent posters continue answering the original question, regardless of the post(s) exposing the OP.

If that's what you are saying - then yes, I too often wonder why people continue answering the original question, regardless of the intervening posts.

I think there is a herd mentality amongst some folks. So, for example, I ask "are all green widget posts a legitimate way of getting backlinks" - if the first 2 or three posters say "yes" then the thread will continue in that way. If the first 2 or three posters say "no", so will subsequent posters. I think some people post either:
a) to boost post count or
b) to show how "clever" or "knowledgeable" they are - but do so simply by repeating what has already been said

Just my cynical 2c worth
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Zanti

14 years ago

Yes Carol,

You got what I was saying and thanks for your response. I don't think it's cynical, just observation.

Brian

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Richard Van

14 years ago

Hi Brian,

I think one of the problems is the phenomenon highlighted by Bill Platt - The dreaded skimmer. Those that read the OP and blindly comment as though only they have the ability to come up with the response they have written, they're not really thinking about "helping" the OP, they just want to get their response in, even if it's already been said numerous times.

I saw a thread recently where the OP asked what "WSO" mean't (one of those things that is no doubt impossible to discover by yourself, with a small amount of research, in this day and age :rolleyes

.

As a conservative guess I'd say 30 or more people all replied with almost exactly the same dictionary style answer.

I think Rosetrees hit the nail on the head but don't worry Brian, I've often scratched my head over it too.

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Bill Farnham

14 years ago

Originally Posted by Richard Van

I saw a thread recently where the OP asked what "WSO" mean't (one of those things that is no doubt impossible to discover by yourself, with a small amount of research, in this day and age :rolleyes

Richard,

WSO = Warrior Special Offer, there's even a special section where you can post those. I'm surprised you didn't know that.

And I agree with the OP. Thanks for sharing.

~Bill

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Zanti 14 years ago

Thanks Richard,

Yes Carol hit the nail on the head and what Bill posted is correct. I think you've brought to light another reason for it happening.

Thanks for talking me down, I needed it.

Thanks also Carol for rephrasing my long post.

Brian
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- Richard Van 14 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Zanti
  
  Thanks for talking me down, I needed it.
  
  Nooo Brian, I wasn't talking you down at all, sorry if it came across like that.
  
  More putting my 2 cents worth in as I've noticed it frequently myself.
  
  I appreciate you bringing it up to be honest.
  
  Thanks
  
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Andyhenry 14 years ago

What Rose and Rich said.

They're skim readers who didn't read anything more than the title or OP, or they're just looking for anything to comment on because they want their sig read or to raise their profile.

There are a lot of ego-driven people that come here with the mindset to milk the forum and it's members for whatever they can so they don't look at things like you do with a clear and logical perspective of several sides of the situation. They're tunnel-visioned for one reason or another and therefore just don't see the stuff they don't care about or that isn't part of what their momentary focus is.

Just ignore it and focus on interacting with people who are on your wavelength and you should feel much better

Andy
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Zanti 14 years ago

Thanks Andy,

I totally get what you're saying. I think for me, I just don't know or understand how someone can think they can be successful (for the long term) by not looking at multiple viewing places and having an intellectual curiosity. I won't even get into the whole honor thing around this.

Oh, I can let this go, it was just happening so frequently that I wanted to bring some additional light to it.

Brian
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chumpschimps

14 years ago

I'm left wondering the same things too.

If you don't have anything extra, or anything of value to add to a thread, then why post a reply?

Surely, it's a good idea to read the WHOLE thread before posting your reply. Depending on the thread, you might want to agree with something soemone has already said, but it's better to add your take on things as well, otherwise what's the point?

Zanti, I'm not sure if you're thinking of a specific post, but I read one today where someone was clearly not telling the truth and had posted blatantly contradicting information on sevearl threads. Even though this person was outed several times and even left a post abusing warriors, people kept blindly posting their replies, with the same information as had been posted 50+ times.

I learn a lot from reading on here and feel sorry for thsoe who clearly don't read it all - they're missing out.

If something that someone says really sparks my interest, I also try and take an interest in the person behind the post - I'll often check out profiles and look for other posts by the same person if I like what they're saying (so don't be surprised if I ever pop up as a vistor on your profile

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chumpschimps 14 years ago

Originally Posted by Zanti

Thanks for talking me down, I needed it.

Originally Posted by Richard Van

Nooo Brian, I wasn't talking you down at all, sorry if it came across like that.

I don't think Zanti means talking him down is a bad thing - I took it to mean that he thought he was losing the plot and you've made him realise he isn't
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Zanti

14 years ago

Thanks chumpschimps,

I've run out of thanks. Yes, I think I'm aware of the thread you're talking about. It's what go me started on this one.

Originally Posted by chumpschimps

If something that someone says really sparks my interest, I also try and take an interest in the person behind the post - I'll often check out profiles and look for other posts by the same person if I like what they're saying (so don't be surprised if I ever pop up as a vistor on your profile

Absolutely agree with this, I'm sure I show up as a visitor on a lot of peoples profile.

Thanks

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Zanti

14 years ago

Hey Randy,

Thanks. You know Randy, being able to share information that you normally wouldn't share is a trait of many successful people. Being able to freely admit what one doesn't know and being ok with admitting it is important for success.

Far to many are afraid of being vulnerable to others in sharing what they don't know. A true warrior, embraces that vulnerability, IMHO.

I think you'll find that most of those that will post here are members that you can trust to share honest information with you.

Just remember what Chumpschimps said below.

Brian

Originally Posted by chumpschimps

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Itachi

14 years ago

Originally Posted by Andyhenry

There are a lot of ego-driven people that come here with the mindset to milk the forum and it's members for whatever they can so they don't look at things like you do with a clear and logical perspective of several sides of the situation. They're tunnel-visioned for one reason or another and therefore just don't see the stuff they don't care about or that isn't part of what their momentary focus is.

Andy

Well said that was clear and concise.

Originally Posted by Zanti

I totally get what you're saying. I think for me, I just don't know or understand how someone can think they can be successful (for the long term) by not looking at multiple viewing places and having an intellectual curiosity. I won't even get into the whole honor thing around this.

Brian

Yea true i could'nt agree more.. sometime you really *Facepalm* when you see some questions being asked..im talking about acronyms for exemple i mean i also wonder when i see someone mention an acronym i never heard about(i would even say some peoples should be careful with what acronym they use i mean the less common ones could be hard to find) this is just an exemple but when you see someone asking what's CPA ? you really got to wonder.. what does it take to go to google(or whatever..) and type "CPA marketing" to find the answer ..

Also sometimes i feel like some peoples DELIBERATELY post threads with useless topics or questions that they already have the answer to, just to get some exposure to their signature or somthing .

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chumpschimps

14 years ago

Originally Posted by Itachi

Also sometimes i feel like some peoples DELIBERATELY post threads with useless topics or questions that they already have the answer to, just to get some exposure to their signature or somthing .

I've seen 3 of these today (2 of them from the same person, who opened threads with exactly the same question both yesterday and today)

The question was written as though from a newbie and was 'what is [insert topic]?'
Obviously, they got 2 sets of answers that people have taken time to write, trying to help. BUT, the person's user name claimed they were [topic] pros and the website in their signature link offers specialist services in the [topic].

What's that all about?

Thanks

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Zanti 14 years ago

No Richard,

Talking me down is a good thing. You were helping me to let go of something that I can't control.

"Talking me down" probably doesn't translate well across the pond. It's really having rational conversation with someone when you're irritated about something.

So your reply was great. Thanks.

Brian
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- Alexa Smith Banned 14 years ago
  
  I don't think either Carol or Brian is being cynical at all, with their observations.
  
  Yes, sometimes threads need to die.
  
  There isn't a way of preventing people from sometimes reading the OP and adding a reply on the end of the thread without having taken any notice at all of what's transpired in-between.
  
  I suspect we each notice it most in the threads that we're most likely to read, because of the apparent relevance of their titles to our interests. For example, I've noticed that in any thread on "ClickBank product selection", whatever the contents of the thread, if it goes on for long enough, there'll always be fresh posts - typically from recent members - saying "Just look for high gravity: it's an indication that the product's selling well". I probably notice those more than other Warriors, because that happens to be the type of misinformation that sometimes irritates me. But perhaps we each have our equivalents of that?
  
  I do occasionally "report" the last post in a thread, without necessarily any specific reference to that post itself, and respectfully suggest to the moderators that it may be time to close a thread, for whatever reason, and they have occasionally done so.
  
  For what it's worth, I do suspect that the matters referred to in this thread are, if anything, probably rather less troublesome here than they are in many other forums.
  
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  Zanti 14 years ago
  
  Lexie,
  
  Now you know that everybody knows that high gravity means a product is selling well.... Ok, Ok, don't shot me. Just couldn't resist. Now someone will come along and say, yes that's true. Then you'll have to refer them to a thread that gives them real information. Sorry Kiddo for opening up that can of worms.
  
  I do think you're right, that it's not as big of a problem here as on other forum. I've just being seeing or at least I perceived, I've noticed a jump here recently.
  
  Maybe a few will take notice.
  
  Brian
  
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prbinc 14 years ago

Originally Posted by Zanti

Then someone shares information that, at least for me brings into questions the honorable motives of the OP. (I have a big thing for being honest.)

Brian

Brian,

I am in full agreement with you. As a relatively new member here, I want to be able to trust this group and share information that I would not normally share. You are so right about honesty. I believe in honesty. Just tell me the truth. No lies please!!!!

Randy
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Joe Benjamin

14 years ago

It's human nature, Zanti.

It's EGO. And, when THAT get's in our way we MUST give
our opinion - even if we know nothing about what we're
sharing.

I think it goes deeper than getting "signatures exposed"...

I think it's a clever way to bring attention to ourselves and
how smart WE are as opposed to HELPING the person who
asked the question in the first place. In other words...

we like to hear ourselves talk. And you know what?

That's just the way it is.

Because, I did the same thing BEFORE I've had any kind of
personal success or something actually worth sharing.

Think about this...

have you ever been in a conversation where you knew jack
s**t about the topic, but you've PRETENDED to know some
-thing about it? We ALL have.

Instead of LISTENING...you were PREPARING your ideas....
and let's face it...admitting you don't KNOW much about the
conversation you're having takes guts.

Because it FEELS like you're not as smart, witty, or confident
about the subject as the other person.

When the OPPOSITE is true.

Giving people their stage to shine and "letting it be" and learn
-ing from it is NOT easy, because it takes attention off you.

It takes more DISCIPLINE to shut-up, listen, and APPLY infor
-mation than it does to ADD your opinion when unnecessary.

Few people can LISTEN more than they talk, because every-
body wants to be heard...

yet nobody wants to listen.

Personally, I learn MORE when I read threads from top to bot
-tom. I'm curious. And, I learn a LOT from other peoples need
to give their opinion - no matter how great or bad it is.

I think peoples reply's in threads reflect how they conversate
with people on the phone, by email, or face to face.

...and it's no wonder so many people are struggling. Because,
a big part in making money is LISTENING and not pretending
to know the answers to questions they don't...

or at least having the common curtosy to read other posts
before making a bee-line to make their own.

I don't like to pretend I know the answers to everything any
more. It's tiresome. I'm happy to give the stage to someone
who I KNOW know's what the hell they're talking about...

and take mental notes.

Besides, I get more work done when I listen more than I talk,
and in the end -- people ask me to do more talking than I care
to do. Why?

Because I do MORE than I talk. I prefer EXPERIENCE. I observe.

I enjoy the actual process and experience of making money and
doing business and meeting new people than parading around
acting as If I know all the answers - when I don't.

If people have a need to SHARE their opinion all the time, even
when it's not needed - perhaps that time is better spent doing
actual work in your business to make money...

instead of trying to make a point.

And that's MY two cents

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Kay King

14 years ago

OK, I skimmed this thread

and here's the easy answer

They're skim readers who didn't read anything more than the title or OP, or they're just looking for anything to comment on because they want their sig read or to raise their profile.

Add those to the "heroes" who want to "help everyone" and you can have a mess of a thread quickly.

kay

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Rose Anderson 14 years ago

Brian,
I agree with you completely. Sadly, the people who need to think about this never will...since they won't read the entire thread!
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- Zanti 14 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Rose Anderson
  
  Brian,
  I agree with you completely. Sadly, the people who need to think about this never will...since they won't read the entire thread!
  
  I know Rose, I think I was just preaching to the choir. I do hope that at least one person picks up and learns something from this thread. We have to start someplace and hope for the best.
  
  Brian
  
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Charlotte Jay 14 years ago

I like trees and peppermint candy and I think your website is crap and needs 3456789023456 backlinks to work.

^^^^^^^^^^

I skimmed this post.

Just kidding. No I agree that some threads need to die a death. I've called out a few people who do this in certain threads. It's like chatter on the radio waves. Very annoying.
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- Ben Armstrong 14 years ago
  
  I agree wholeheartedly with the OP and whatever the hell the posts above me say.
  
  If real life conversations were anything like a thread on the warrior forum we'd all be deaf, stupid and strangely compelled to buy weight loss products.
  
  What's even worse are the one's answering a long winded, very specific question in the OP with "Yes, backlinks are very important to rank your site in google" type response.
  
  If signature links were paid... even just a dollar a year, we'd see a lot less crap on this forum.
  
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RobCopywriter

14 years ago

I know how you feel. Some people put on this act to achieve their goals. But this type of problem comes with the territory, we just have to deal and learn from it all.

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jimmel196

14 years ago

I have experienced it first hand. I paid for a instruction service by a WF member, who has had many other people pay for his instruction and has many, many views and comments on his post. I am not going to name names for obvious reasons. As part of the instruction, the student sends completed assignments to the instructor for evaluation and approval prior to proceeding. Shortly after doing so I found a site that had utilized 3 of the 4 keywords that I submitted and the exact wording that the instructor was providing in his instruction to me. His domain name and website was set up shortly after I provided the information to him. Now, while I cannot prove that this person did this, I know that he did. Now, how many other sites are being set up off the hard work of unsuspecting students. That is a crappy way to do someone who is paying you money for instruction and trusts that the instructor will be honest and sincere. All that I can say is BEWARE. I hate to have that attitude but it seems as though that so many people are out to scam someone out of something. Well, that's my 2 cents worth. Sorry for seeming so negative but still have a bad taste in my mouth.

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Joseph Robinson

Banned 14 years ago

Originally Posted by jimmel196

I pray that this post just ironically has nothing to do with what the OP or ANYONE has said so far.

Zanti, might be your turn to talk me down.

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Zanti 14 years ago

Originally Posted by Joe128139

I pray that this post just ironically has nothing to do with what the OP or ANYONE has said so far.

Zanti, might be your turn to talk me down.

Alright Joe, take a deep breath and relax. It's going to happen. No matter what any of us say, write or do, some just won't get it.

It's ok, granted we all have made mistakes, but it's what we learn from our mistakes that's important. You owned your mistake and I can tell you've learned from it. You've done your part.

Carry on my friend.

Brian
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Joseph Robinson Banned 14 years ago

It is mostly laziness in my opinion. Hell, I'll even admit that I've done it before. Last night there was a thread like that, and I just scrolled to the bottom of the page and added my opinion. Later on, I actually read through and saw that someone had proven the OP to be a farce.

I then commented on how I was stupid for ignoring that, hoping someone, ANYONE would notice and save themselves the same embarassment. Needless to say it didn't work out so well.
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clever7

14 years ago

The Warrior forum is a marketplace. Many people come here just because they want to sell something through their signature or their posts. They are not really interested on having a conversation.

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Zanti

14 years ago

Originally Posted by clever7

The Warrior forum is a marketplace. Many people come here just because they want to sell something through their signature or their posts. They are not really interested on having a conversation

Thanks Clever7,

Those that come here just to sell, generally don't sell much. Those who contribute and engage honestly with others and have a good product will make sales. At least that's my opinion.

I always take notice of what people contribute here prior to buying someone's product. It doesn't have to be something in a thread or post but in how they engage with those posting on their wso.

I prefer to get a feel for the seller and sometimes I can do it through how they interact with others. No, I don't do it each time I buy something but I try and make that one of the ways I do business.

There have been a number of people in our forum that I could never buy from just based on how they've engaged with other people. My process for this is complicated but it all comes down to honor.

Yep I'm weird, I know it and embrace it. Honor and being an honorable iMarketer is something that is at the top of my priories in how I conduct and engage in business and life.

Brian

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Talk Me Down Please

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