What will you choose, money or fulfillment?

by AwanR
30 replies
Hi Guys,

This morning, I stumble upon these sentences:

Money, beyond sustenance, is just a naive attempt at fulfillment. And work, at its best, is a valiant attempt to make an impact in what matters most to you...what matters even more to you than making more dollars.

With this logic, one could argue that wealth frees you up to work even more, for all the right reasons.
I wonder to know how is your perspective on this. Will you prefer money first or fulfillment of life first?

Cheers,
Awan
#choose #fulfillment #money
  • Profile picture of the author jasondinner
    Originally Posted by AwanR View Post

    Hi Guys,

    This morning, I stumble upon these sentences:



    I wonder to know how is your perspective on this. Will you prefer money first or fulfillment of life first?

    Cheers,
    Awan
    I choose money, so I can have more freedom to experience fulfillment...
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    • Profile picture of the author anwiii
      i think part of the meaning of life is striving to become fulfilled. how one becomes fulfilled or continues to be fulfilled has some form or another to do with helping others and being the best one can be.

      realistically speaking, money can be used as a tool for fulfillment in other areas but when money becomes a distraction, fulfillment is never reached.

      in an idealistic world, money has absolutely no value where fulfillment is concerned

      what i will always believe for myself is that fulfillment and understanding the meaning behind it comes first before money. otherwise, we wont fully understand the value of money and what it can be used for in the long run to help us become more fulfilled. spending money on non essential things or saving it up. money would become a distraction, making it would be the only thing one would know how to do and never get enough of it. this would be the case up until one goes through realization in what is most important....probably based on bordom and the feeling that there has to be something more in life.

      in the end, if a person is making a living with whatever they are doing and unfulfilled, they are in the wrong business and need to change paths. this intimates that fulfillment or striving for it should always come first for everyone.
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    • Profile picture of the author Ayawa
      Originally Posted by jasondinner View Post

      I choose money, so I can have more freedom to experience fulfillment...
      I choose fulfillment, so I can have more freedom to experience money.
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      • Profile picture of the author jasondinner
        Originally Posted by Ayawa View Post

        I choose fulfillment, so I can have more freedom to experience money.
        How's that working for you?

        Not trying to put you on the spot, but being that you quoted me and wrote the exact opposite as what I wrote -- and you're certainly within your right to feel that way -- I'm just curious.

        Are you on your own? Or do you still answer to a boss?
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  • Profile picture of the author NootropicBrain
    I would choose Fulfilment, because if I'm fulfilled, I must be happy with my situation, and therefore either a) Not need money, or B) Have money.
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  • This post just makes me think of maslows hierarchy. Money is fun, but its not the only thing that brings fulfillment and its not really an either or scenario
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  • Profile picture of the author Slade556
    I'd say both, what's fulfillment if you can't afford anything, and working for money but not feeling fulfilled is such a drag.
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  • Profile picture of the author AwanR
    Thank you for wonderful answers guys


    Originally Posted by jasondinner View Post

    I choose money, so I can have more freedom to experience fulfillment...
    @Jason, So are you more into work hard now even if you don't like the work and then after you gain your target amount of money you quit what you're doing then enjoy the money? If yes, would love to hear more about how you can endure it and how long you achieved target that you put on yourself.


    Originally Posted by anwiii View Post

    i think part of the meaning of life is striving to become fulfilled. how one becomes fulfilled or continues to be fulfilled has some form or another to do with helping others and being the best one can be.
    ....
    @ Anwii, does the fulfillment that you experienced last for long time? How if you stop feeling the same way like you started, how you manage it?


    Originally Posted by NootropicBrain View Post

    I would choose Fulfilment, because if I'm fulfilled, I must be happy with my situation, and therefore either a) Not need money, or B) Have money.
    @NootropicBrain, have you achieved that state yet? What is your strategy to achieve it?


    Originally Posted by Ayawa View Post

    I choose fulfillment, so I can have more freedom to experience money.
    @Ayawa, how will you experience money if you already feel fulfilled?


    Originally Posted by Jesse MindfulMoney View Post

    This post just makes me think of maslows hierarchy. Money is fun, but its not the only thing that brings fulfillment and its not really an either or scenario
    @Jesse, if I'm not mistaken the top maslow hierarchy is self expression? is there any saying about the place of money on that hierarchy?


    Originally Posted by Slade556 View Post

    I'd say both, what's fulfillment if you can't afford anything, and working for money but not feeling fulfilled is such a drag.
    @Slade556, in ideal world both will be great how if you just started?


    Cheers Guys!
    Awan
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    • Profile picture of the author jasondinner
      Originally Posted by AwanR View Post

      @Jason, So are you more into work hard now even if you don't like the work and then after you gain your target amount of money you quit what you're doing then enjoy the money? If yes, would love to hear more about how you can endure it and how long you achieved target that you put on yourself.
      I've always gone hard no matter if I liked the work or not.

      It just so happens that I love what I do and the money is great.

      When I reach my target amount of money, as you put it, I will not quit.

      I will just set a new target.

      How do I endure? I have a wife and 4 kids who depend on me to produce and it's my duty and responsibility to them and as a human to succeed exceed my expectations of myself.

      So far I have not, so only one way to move and that is forward. I'm well on my way, but no where near where I want to be money or fulfillment wise.
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    • Profile picture of the author NootropicBrain
      Originally Posted by AwanR View Post

      Thank you for wonderful answers guys




      @Jason, So are you more into work hard now even if you don't like the work and then after you gain your target amount of money you quit what you're doing then enjoy the money? If yes, would love to hear more about how you can endure it and how long you achieved target that you put on yourself.




      @ Anwii, does the fulfillment that you experienced last for long time? How if you stop feeling the same way like you started, how you manage it?




      @NootropicBrain, have you achieved that state yet? What is your strategy to achieve it?




      @Ayawa, how will you experience money if you already feel fulfilled?




      @Jesse, if I'm not mistaken the top maslow hierarchy is self expression? is there any saying about the place of money on that hierarchy?




      @Slade556, in ideal world both will be great how if you just started?


      Cheers Guys!
      Awan
      @AwanR

      I have achieved it fleetingly, a few times. Change. Change is the progenitor of all states, both positive, and negative. For a brief while, you are fulfilled, you are happy, and you need for nothing. Yet again, change comes, and takes that away. Do not seek to avoid change, embrace it, for change will be there whether you're looking for it or not, and you might as well make it your friend.
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  • Profile picture of the author QueenMelanie
    I can see where people come from when they say money can't by happiness, but i just don't think I can agree. Sure, if you are kanye wests kid, he will grow up a millionaire and probably won't get happiness from it.

    But me, and other people here probably started IM with nothing, we appreciate and respect money and what it can do, and the power it has. Money has made me feel fulfilled because I am living an awesome life, earn a sexy wage from the comfort of my laptop, I work 5 hours max per day, I travel the world and take my wage with me, I can afford things I want/need. I am exremely happy and satisfied, and that is directly because of money..

    This may sound mean, I do not mean to be mean, but I think that the only people who think money won't bring happiness are people who don't have money, and likely never will. But if one of them wins the lotto,or inherits a large sum, or gets a CEO role with high pay ? Do you think they would change their tune? of course they would
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  • Profile picture of the author Rory Singh
    I think a person should be able to make more beyond sustenance (if they choose to). I had to look that word up.

    Money does not equal fulfillment but people come here to have some kind of experience and purpose in life.

    How can they experience fulfillment in those areas with just enough money for sustenance?

    So money clearly has a greater purpose than just the ability of buying stuff.

    But I don't believe more money will come to that person unless they are full filled in a way by acceptance and gratitude for where they are right now.

    Acceptance doesn't mean that they shouldn't work towards a better lifestyle with more money and freedom. It just means that they are not 'resisting' what is happening to them now.

    I don't think I have to choose between money and fulfillment because they seem to work hand in hand with each other.

    So I want BOTH.
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  • Profile picture of the author DanielaFuego
    If you want to enjoy life, focus on relationships and health once you make more than $75,000 a year.

    But not before
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    • Profile picture of the author kk075
      Originally Posted by DanielaFuego View Post

      If you want to enjoy life, focus on relationships and health once you make more than $75,000 a year.

      But not before
      That's horrible advice....family ALWAYS comes first. Because even though this is a loaded topic, neither money or fulfillment mean a thing if you're not taking care of the people who love you.
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      • Profile picture of the author jasondinner
        Originally Posted by kk075 View Post

        That's horrible advice....family ALWAYS comes first. Because even though this is a loaded topic, neither money or fulfillment mean a thing if you're not taking care of the people who love you.
        So true, and in many places of the world, especially where I live, you need MONEY to take care of your family
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      • Profile picture of the author Bhekizwe
        Originally Posted by kk075 View Post

        That's horrible advice....family ALWAYS comes first. Because even though this is a loaded topic, neither money or fulfillment mean a thing if you're not taking care of the people who love you.
        True.God first, family second and everything else after that.Money provides for happiness
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  • Profile picture of the author JimsonWright
    Money can't but fulfillment that's for sure. I feel like fulfillment can be achieved without the monetary gain. I think its better to think money as a bonus for being successful and not to feel successful because of the money in return.
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    • Profile picture of the author TheWriteOne
      Originally Posted by JimsonWright View Post

      Money can't but fulfillment that's for sure.
      Would really depend on who you are asking. Yes not everything can be bought by money but money sure helps getting you fulfilled. Imagine not having any money at all, you couldn't even fulfill the basic needs.
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  • Profile picture of the author RogozRazvan
    Who says you can't have them both?

    Why do some people think so much in terms of black and white?

    What it is better, being healthy or being rich?
    What it is better, a good family or a good job?

    Nobody said that these are not compatible. They are actually connected. You can use money to be more fulfilled. And they are not even in the same category, as money are a tool and fulfillment is a psychological state.
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  • Profile picture of the author AwanR
    Originally Posted by QueenMelanie View Post

    I can see where people come from when they say money can't by happiness, but i just don't think I can agree. Sure, if you are kanye wests kid, he will grow up a millionaire and probably won't get happiness from it.

    But me, and other people here probably started IM with nothing, we appreciate and respect money and what it can do, and the power it has. Money has made me feel fulfilled because I am living an awesome life, earn a sexy wage from the comfort of my laptop, I work 5 hours max per day, I travel the world and take my wage with me, I can afford things I want/need. I am exremely happy and satisfied, and that is directly because of money..

    This may sound mean, I do not mean to be mean, but I think that the only people who think money won't bring happiness are people who don't have money, and likely never will. But if one of them wins the lotto,or inherits a large sum, or gets a CEO role with high pay ? Do you think they would change their tune? of course they would
    @QueenMelanie,
    I also came from the same background from you. Not having much money and internet make it happen for me to work from home for the past 4 years, near the one that I love. However some of my friends that having the same background telling me that there are some occasion that money is not giving them satisfaction. Offcourse it give them comfort but then they're like craving something else outside of the money. Do you have any idea of this?


    Originally Posted by Rory Singh View Post

    I think a person should be able to make more beyond sustenance (if they choose to). I had to look that word up.

    Money does not equal fulfillment but people come here to have some kind of experience and purpose in life.

    How can they experience fulfillment in those areas with just enough money for sustenance?

    So money clearly has a greater purpose than just the ability of buying stuff.

    But I don't believe more money will come to that person unless they are fullfilled in a way by acceptance and gratitude for where they are right now.

    Acceptance doesn't mean that they shouldn't work towards a better lifestyle with more money and freedom. It just means that they are not 'resisting' what is happening to them now.

    I don't think I have to choose between money and fulfillment because they seem to work hand in hand with each other.

    So I want BOTH.
    @Rory Singh,
    Thank you for your beautiful description. Your words remind me of some saying that to be able to be in the state of flow we need a balance between "gratitude for now" and "vision of the future".


    Originally Posted by jasondinner View Post

    I've always gone hard no matter if I liked the work or not.

    It just so happens that I love what I do and the money is great.

    When I reach my target amount of money, as you put it, I will not quit.

    I will just set a new target.

    How do I endure? I have a wife and 4 kids who depend on me to produce and it's my duty and responsibility to them and as a human to succeed exceed my expectations of myself.

    So far I have not, so only one way to move and that is forward. I'm well on my way, but no where near where I want to be money or fulfillment wise.
    @Jasondinner,
    When you achieved your target, then set new target, have you ever feel tired/bored of it?


    Originally Posted by NootropicBrain View Post

    @AwanR

    I have achieved it fleetingly, a few times. Change. Change is the progenitor of all states, both positive, and negative. For a brief while, you are fulfilled, you are happy, and you need for nothing. Yet again, change comes, and takes that away. Do not seek to avoid change, embrace it, for change will be there whether you're looking for it or not, and you might as well make it your friend.
    @NootropicBrain,
    Seems like you are ok and able to enjoy the fluctuation between fullfillment feeling and unfulfillment. It's a great way of life I must say


    Originally Posted by JimsonWright View Post

    Money can't but fulfillment that's for sure. I feel like fulfillment can be achieved without the monetary gain. I think its better to think money as a bonus for being successful and not to feel successful because of the money in return.
    @JimsonWright,
    Nice thought But how do you cope with the feeling sometime you you do "need" money?


    Originally Posted by RogozRazvan View Post

    Who says you can't have them both?

    Why do some people think so much in terms of black and white?

    What it is better, being healthy or being rich?
    What it is better, a good family or a good job?

    Nobody said that these are not compatible. They are actually connected. You can use money to be more fulfilled. And they are not even in the same category, as money are a tool and fulfillment is a psychological state.
    @RogozRazvan,
    Thank you for sharing another perspective onto the question. It's enlightening to see that it's in different category but connected to each other. May I know how you come up with that?


    @All,
    Thank you for the beautiful answers. You've enrich my soul with it. Hopefully someday you can visit my country and I'll buy you a drink

    Cheers,
    Awan
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  • Profile picture of the author Theertha
    I would like to choose Fulfillment of Life, Because till now I never felt that I had good life. Then later, I choose money to save my family.
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  • Profile picture of the author liaswift
    fulfillment, coz at that time i think will have money
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  • Profile picture of the author RogozRazvan
    @AwanR - money are something tangible. Fulfillment is not. You can't put them in the same class.

    You can use money as fuel to achieve whatever goal you want. If fulfillment for you means getting rid of world hunger, then you can use money to do this. Or you can volunteer. Nobody said that money is the ONLY method.

    This is why these type of questions are frowned upon, from a logical point of view. It is not something like "What do you prefer - planes or trains?". Each comes with cons and pros, they serve the same goal - transportation.

    But MONEY are FULFILLMENT are not on the same page, not even in the same book. And most importantly, they are not mutually exclusive.

    But to answer your question - if you have money, you can purchase fulfillment, even if it may be at a superficial level. If you have fulfillment, money may not be so important anymore but you can use them to maintain your conditions.

    A better question, one that makes more sense would be:

    "Would you sacrifice your happiness to have a lot of money? Or would you prefer to have a modest life, like the Dalai Lama, but never be financially successful?"

    And this is better because it leads to value judgements. What is more important as a value - money or happiness. Some people prefer money. For example, if you've read Warren Buffet's biogprahy, you would see that he felt miserable for a large part of his life because he prefered money. His focus was never on what money could buy him but money as a goal in itself.

    I admire him as an investor but I actually felt sorry for him when I've read The Snowball Effect. I was happy to have far less money but have someone who loves me and other passions in life instead of being on a crazy pursuit for a larger bank account.

    On the other hand you have people like Richard Branson. While money is a goal in itself there too, he actually uses the money to be fulfilled. All those toys, private islands and daredevil experiences actually cost hard cold cash. I can say that he is in the middle.

    And then you have people who actually like a modest and care-free life. They don't have a lot of money, but they can sustain themselves. Monks enter this category.

    As far as this goes ...

    Quote:
    Money, beyond sustenance, is just a naive attempt at fulfillment. And work, at its best, is a valiant attempt to make an impact in what matters most to you...what matters even more to you than making more dollars.

    With this logic, one could argue that wealth frees you up to work even more, for all the right reasons.

    ---

    Everything could be said that is just a naive attempt at fulfillment. Love. Caring. Everything. But the beauty of life is that things are not black and white. Money is not positive or negative. Is a tool. You can use to make yourself miserable or you can use them to make yourself happy.

    If life is a car, money are the fuel you put in the car, among others. Where you drive is your decision. You can take the decision to drive straight into a wall and kill yourself. This is when money is used to actually decrease the quality of your life. Or you can have the best voyage of your life. It is a choice.

    And constructs like above can be used for anything. You can substitute money with any other tangible or non-tangible resource that exists.
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  • Profile picture of the author JimsonWright
    I'm not saying the you don't need money. Its almost the same to my belief that money can buy happiness, but it can make sadness bearable. Money can't buy fulfillment but it can help you get there.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mark Singletary
    Here's a scenario:

    You are broke and hurting because you are broke. You live in the USA with your spouse and 3 children ages 8-15. You have a job offer in Asia making $150,000 a year. Based on the cost of living you can send more than half of that back which is "enough" for your family (much more than you have now).

    However the stipulation of the job is that because of your job duties, you may not return home and your family may not visit for the entire year. Will you take the job?

    If you add another year to your contract with the same stipulation they will add a $50,000 bonus. Will you take the job?

    If they offer more years with additional bonuses, how many years are you willing to completely be away from your family for the $$?

    Mark
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    • Profile picture of the author AwanR
      Originally Posted by RogozRazvan View Post

      @AwanR - money are something tangible. Fulfillment is not. You can't put them in the same class.

      You can use money as fuel to achieve whatever goal you want. If fulfillment for you means getting rid of world hunger, then you can use money to do this. Or you can volunteer. Nobody said that money is the ONLY method.

      This is why these type of questions are frowned upon, from a logical point of view. It is not something like "What do you prefer - planes or trains?". Each comes with cons and pros, they serve the same goal - transportation.

      But MONEY are FULFILLMENT are not on the same page, not even in the same book. And most importantly, they are not mutually exclusive.

      But to answer your question - if you have money, you can purchase fulfillment, even if it may be at a superficial level. If you have fulfillment, money may not be so important anymore but you can use them to maintain your conditions.

      A better question, one that makes more sense would be:

      ...............

      If life is a car, money are the fuel you put in the car, among others. Where you drive is your decision. You can take the decision to drive straight into a wall and kill yourself. This is when money is used to actually decrease the quality of your life. Or you can have the best voyage of your life. It is a choice.

      And constructs like above can be used for anything. You can substitute money with any other tangible or non-tangible resource that exists.
      @RogozRazvan,
      Such a beautiful answer. I didn't know that Warren Buffet have that kind of sad stories! I've read Richard Branson biography and I enjoy it very much since he seems to enjoy live a lot. Thank you for sharing this


      Originally Posted by liaswift View Post

      fulfillment, coz at that time i think will have money
      @liaswift,
      You think you will have money, but how about the reality?

      Originally Posted by Theertha View Post

      I would like to choose Fulfillment of Life, Because till now I never felt that I had good life. Then later, I choose money to save my family.
      @Theertha,
      Why you never felt the fulfillment? If you look at your life, are you considering yourself money chaser or fulfillment chaser?


      Originally Posted by TheWriteOne View Post

      Would really depend on who you are asking. Yes not everything can be bought by money but money sure helps getting you fulfilled. Imagine not having any money at all, you couldn't even fulfill the basic needs.
      @TheWriteOne,
      I agree that without money at all, I couldn't even fulfill the basic needs. But I'm curious with your answer "Would really depend on who you are asking." Perhaps you like to explain more about it?


      Originally Posted by Mark Singletary View Post

      Here's a scenario:

      You are broke and hurting because you are broke. You live in the USA with your spouse and 3 children ages 8-15. You have a job offer in Asia making $150,000 a year. Based on the cost of living you can send more than half of that back which is "enough" for your family (much more than you have now).

      However the stipulation of the job is that because of your job duties, you may not return home and your family may not visit for the entire year. Will you take the job?

      If you add another year to your contract with the same stipulation they will add a $50,000 bonus. Will you take the job?

      If they offer more years with additional bonuses, how many years are you willing to completely be away from your family for the $$?

      Mark
      @Mark,
      I might be biased because I live in Asia. But looking at the situation, I think I have responsibility to provide to my family. That case I'd take the job for one year and save frugally. After a year I'll back to US or find another job in Asia to take my family with me. I'm sure I'll be in better financial state at that time

      How about you?
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  • I'd choose fulfillment.

    I've tried working for money and I've tried working for fulfillment. When I was working for money, it felt like work. When I worked for fulfillment, the money just flowed right in without me asking and it didn't feel like work.
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    • Profile picture of the author AwanR
      Originally Posted by John Jonas Phil VA View Post

      I'd choose fulfillment.

      I've tried working for money and I've tried working for fulfillment. When I was working for money, it felt like work. When I worked for fulfillment, the money just flowed right in without me asking and it didn't feel like work.
      @John Jonas,
      I'm sure that attitude will have different result on your work quality.
      But curious if it have different result financially?

      Cheers,
      Awan
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    • Profile picture of the author anwiii
      finally someone who posted in this thread that i can relate to and obviously knows what money has to offer and what fulfillment has to offer. i've been reading the answers on this thread and they have just been depressing me because a lot of people don't "get it". there is no lightbuldb that is going off for people. if there is, it is limited.

      to take it a step further, if one is fulfilled, they don't need more money unless it's going to be used for other people. i've mentored people in the past in the im industry and the first question i ask them is "if you were homeless, can you be fulfilled?". most people will say no, and this is why i feel there is no light bulb going off for a lot of people in this world. for the most part, society and the people who live in it look down on the homeless because they don't see the purpose behind it or the meaning or the actual WORK and drive it takes to be homeless.

      i used to struggle with this question about money and fulfillment every day. i still have to keep myself in check sometimes because money is fun to have and it's so easy to make. but like i have told people in the past, "if the path is easy, it's probably not the right path".

      there is no meaning or purpose behind money except that money pays the bills. there is nothing to learn from it or help you be fulfilled. it just pays the bills. it's so easy to make too. if you are able to work hard, you are able to earn money. it's as simple as that.

      technology is the reason why people want and even need more money. in 200 years, people will be living like kings compared to today just like we are living like kings right now compared to 200 years ago. why? because of technology. money and technology go hand in hand and people can't get enough of it. people look down on others who don't have those things in their life and they look down on their own selves if they don't have enough of it based on their own expectations.

      money will always be available to those who always want "more" and can never be happy with what they have. money leads to a never ending cycle for a lot of people in this world and those that are sucked in by it will never become fulfilled and there will always be something missing in their life because they feel money is more important.

      Originally Posted by John Jonas Phil VA View Post

      I'd choose fulfillment.

      I've tried working for money and I've tried working for fulfillment. When I was working for money, it felt like work. When I worked for fulfillment, the money just flowed right in without me asking and it didn't feel like work.
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  • Profile picture of the author lincolndesigns
    Fulfillment is definitely my priority. Even though money is a big part of my fulfillment, if I'm fulfilled without it, that means I must be doing something right.
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