Fear Of Failure

I don't fear failure. Failure is inevitable. It's like seeing the dawn but you must fist see the darkness of the night. Failure is just around the corner. But no matter how many times I fall, I always make sure that I get up unscathed.

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Mary McLean

15 years ago

Just imagine if we abandoned our children because they didn't walk first off, but kept on falling down all the time.

We grow through not achieving our desired outcomes, even though we don't actually fail, we do achieve a result, just not the one we wanted!

Try this out to see if you are game enough "to go for it"

Hang on, I'm an Aussie...I'll decode that for you...
That means "are you brave enough to go full steam ahead to achieve what you want?"

This is what you do. Make a Vow and ask for it!

A friend put that to me to-day and it amazed me with it's simplicity...and cutting edged raw power.

Try it. You'll soon find out what you really want and why you can't/don't get it

Kindest...

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laurarussell49 15 years ago

Let's take a look at the steps which lead us to fearlessness:

-Get to know your fears
-Get to know the source of your fears
-Step into the things feared
-Make the negative flow stop
-Enlighten all
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razorico

15 years ago

Originally Posted by poath

If you, like me, face this problem. I want you to write down 2 columns, 1 for what happens if you succeed and 1 for what happens if you don't even try.

Well, there's a proverb :
If you Find-don't be happy, if lost - do not cry.
You should be independent of both feelings to succeed.

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Jarrod

15 years ago

I was actually watching some Tony Robbins this weekend and liked something he had to say on failure. Paraphrasing, it was something like this:

Failure is an illusion. We all love to learn, and when we learn we succeed. Fact is we cannot fail without learning something. Which means that when we fail we actually succeed.

As Kennedy said, only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

People don't want to fail, but are eager to learn. Once you learn this you can transform your eagerness to learn into eagerness to fail, and then you can really succeed.

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gorvene

15 years ago

Originally Posted by Jedi Jarrod

I was actually watching some Tony Robbins this weekend and liked something he had to say on failure. Paraphrasing, it was something like this:

Failure is an illusion. We all love to learn, and when we learn we succeed. Fact is we cannot fail without learning something. Which means that when we fail we actually succeed.

As Kennedy said, only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

People don't want to fail, but are eager to learn. Once you learn this you can transform your eagerness to learn into eagerness to fail, and then you can really succeed.

This is a wonderful statement from tony robbins...

Thanks
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JasonChoi 15 years ago

Fear is definitely an illusion. In my experience, it literally is False Evidence Appearing Real.

The key is to use effective methods for removing such fears. I've had good experiences with EFT, Sedona Method/Release Technique, and NLP.

And here's something you can do right now which works for me:

Just say any combination of these words to yourself over and over, "peace, poise, calm, confidence" for 5 minutes at a time, and do it several times a day. Whenever you feel the fear, just say those words. This is not an affirmation. All you're doing is focusing your attention on the positive, and it will result in you feeling those words. I used to think you have to spend countless hours removing negativity using the above methods, but I noticed the negativity can be removed as you focus on the positive.

It may seem strange, but after 20 minutes of saying "peace" to myself, much of the fear I felt literally went away.

If you do this consistently for a few days, you'll notice you'll feel lighter. It's a cool trick because it's not an affirmation which typically stirs up resistance. It's just a word that forces you to pay attention to it

And as Tony Robbins would say, "What you focus on is what you get". If you're holding in mind fear, you're focusing on it. If you interrupt the negativity with 'peace', your mind will begin to focus on peace. Over time, it will become your dominant thought which then allows you to do what you want with far greater ease. Or at least, that's been my experience. Hope this helps!
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RhondaG

15 years ago

Fear can make you almost freeze up completely, but once you start fighting back and stepping out on faith it gets easier and easier to take a leap.

To me it's a mindset. I have to make up my mind every time I need to learn or do something new, but each time I learn, I also gain confidence.

As far as working from home on the Internet, for me it was a matter of changing my mind from a JOB mentality of "who can I work for" to a "I'm the boss and this is my business".

Followers can make good money, but leaders can practically invent it!

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JasonChoi

15 years ago

Originally Posted by RhondaG

As far as working from home on the Internet, for me it was a matter of changing my mind from a JOB mentality of "who can I work for" to a "I'm the boss and this is my business".

Followers can make good money, but leaders can practically invent it!

This is excellent! My thoughts exactly!

When people shift from job to business, they tend to feel like they need permission from someone (like a boss) to get paid, when in fact, the key is to be one's own boss and call the shots as a leader.

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JasonChoi

15 years ago

Oh and what if in business there is no failure, but only feedback?

What difference would that make in your business?

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Cardiologist

15 years ago

Fear, in all facets of human life, can mitigate the quality of our experience, primarily due to its debilitation condition.

For example, logically speaking, we should be more afraid of dying in some form or another; however, ESE polls have consistently revealed the FEAR of public speaking transcends the former.

Fear, although a natural human emotion, can be built up through a number of different processes into nothing short of an obstruction.

If we translate FEAR to internet marketing, it can and often does have the same paralyzing effects; consequently, mitigating your 'life experience' or results on the web.

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Lori Kelly

15 years ago

Some people are actually afraid of success.

No one likes to fail. I don't think anyone who starts their own business hopes it fails. There is a fear of failure, there always will be. We are human and that emotion will creep in. The key is to keep it down, override it, if you will.

What works for one person, may not work for someone else.

You find a balance. You discover what works to keep fear away.

For me, the biggest fear of failure or regret would be the "could've", "should've" "would've" regrets. I cannot live with that. I can live with my giving it 100%, knowing I did everything I could possible do. Then I could accept failure, but it would be a difficult pill to swallow.

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Eddie Titan

15 years ago

Fear is a major factor in the success of many entrepreneurs.

The worst is when a person is fearful of starting a business but doesn't know that the reason he/she does not more forward in their business is because of fear.

This thread make some great points.

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gorvene

15 years ago

It is understandable that someone fears failure but they should also know that failure is a part of the process of succeeding. Each failure is like a trial and you technically don't fail until you give up. Once you give up you are defeated.

Life contains a series of successes and failures and we should learn from both. Our failures prepare us for the successes we will eventually achieve if we don’t give up. When you fail you should look at it as failing forward. By this I mean each failure shows you what doesn’t work and what you need to do.

Our failures also help to keep us humble when we eventually succeed. So don’t feel down when you fail because you are getting closer to your goals.

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potentialeight

15 years ago

In my experience working with people, fear of failure is much harder to identify and work with than a lot of people think. With that having been said, a small amount of preparation time (like the kind mentioned so far in this thread) can go a long way. It has a sort of bootstrapping effect to take you from one state of mind to another and effectively bypassing whatever unconscious junk you have going on.

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PinkVelvet

15 years ago

Everyone has fear of failure. In fact, this is the #1 thing that stops us from succeeding. Anyone could be successful. I'll give you an example, actually. Let's say someone wants to start an art business. They fear that no one will buy their works, money will be lost, or that their work is not good enough. No matter what you do, there is always someone who will be interested in what you have to offer. Spend some time with yourself and also create a plan. It will really help you to get rid of the fear you have.

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Marco P

15 years ago

Originally Posted by PinkVelvet

Everyone has fear of failure. In fact, this is the #1 thing that stops us from succeeding. Anyone could be successful. I'll give you an example, actually. Let's say someone wants to start an art business. They fear that no one will buy their works, money will be lost, or that their work is not good enough. No matter what you do, there is always someone who will be interested in what you have to offer. Spend some time with yourself and also create a plan. It will really help you to get rid of the fear you have.

You brought an excellent point,its not only about overcome your fears of failure
(which is IMPERATIVE) but also to go with a plan!

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The Lawyer

Banned 15 years ago

Fear is commonly associated with the unknown. We fear what we do not know, it is in this context that we 'dream up' things, typically negative things that inhibit us in more than a few ways.

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vjandroid1

15 years ago

I'm sharing my thoughts here bcz by this time I think my capabilty of facing fear has grown up too much...when I was a beginer I got my 4 adsense accounts ban continuosly and its interesting to know when 4 th one was banned and one of my friend called to me to inform that to me..I was normal..it was like a common thing for me...
when a person gets too many failure he/she becomes used to for that and than the failure doesn't brings fear to him..and these are the only one who atlast succeeds..
whats the best thing I do now to overcome fear of failure is to just "MOVE ON TO NEXT WORK AS YOU FINISHES THE FIRST WEATHER YOU GET FAILURE OR SUCCESS" atleast you will have hope to get success in your second work if you loses the first..

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lyndal

15 years ago

Another good one from Tony Robbins goes something like "Massive failure = massive success". I guess that is, if one keeps on going. I do know quite a bit about the former part of that equation and I still going.

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Mary McLean

15 years ago

I think the most important thing is to be aware you have fears in the first place!

They say that understanding and identifying a fear disables it by at least 80%!

That's an awesome piece of information to carry around with you...

It is also said regarding fear, to just name it out loud and then disable your emotional charge around it.

Way to go!

Just tried that strategy out to-day on an interview and Presto...

Great results!

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kristabarnett

15 years ago

thanks for sharing

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paul nicholls

15 years ago

the fear of failure in IM is always a tricky one

generally the fear of failure has a much worse effect when you put all of your efforts into IM... i mean every last breath, because by doing this you are certain that this is the career path that you want

being this passionate makes you fear failure more but at the same time your chance of success is also increased by about 99.9% because your not just sitting on the fence

the one thing ive always told myself and how ive kept going IS THIS....

"IF YOU JUST KEEP going and going and going and going and going.... its impossible for you to fail

because you would of eventually worked out everything that doesnt work

but also if your the sort of person that is lazy by nature and you want fast riches and you just want to make some fast bucks and you dont want to actually build a real online stable business, then this mindset will delay your success for a long long time

if not ever!

once you start thinking like i sid above, combined with a professional business attitude and lots of motivation then success is just around the corner

paul

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poath

15 years ago

Originally Posted by paul nicholls

the one thing ive always told myself and how ive kept going IS THIS....

"IF YOU JUST KEEP going and going and going and going and going.... its impossible for you to fail

This is similiar to something my friend told me the other day. He basically said he don't mind losing as long as he is the last one standing at the end. What he basically meant was it doesn't matter if you lose the battle as long as you win the war.

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WelshWarrior 15 years ago

"Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm."

Churchill, Winston
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WelshWarrior 15 years ago

reminds me of the Art Willaims "Just do it" speech
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- cliftoncarden 15 years ago
  
  When I think of "failure" I am reminded of Thomas Edison who "failed" thousands of times in creating the incandescent light bulb.
  
  Thomas Edison was interviewed and asked how he felt about failing thousands of times in inventing the light bulb.
  
  His response was "I didn't "fail" I successfully found 1,000 ways to NOT invent the light bulb"
  
  You see, he was able to reframe his "failures" into successes.
  
  The path to success is laiden with "failure"
  
  Namaste
  
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Akechi

15 years ago

Great thread. Success is not for the timid!

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Chrismiksen

15 years ago

The fear of failure, I think, stems from society. Many people are taught from a very young age that failure is bad, and so people carry that mindset with them throughout their lives.

Whenever I hear that someone is afraid to fail, I always think back to the story of the IBM executive. When an executive at IBM made a $10 million mistake, he went to Tom Watson and said he was going to resign. Watson replied, "Are you kidding me? We just spent $10 million educating you."

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joekyut

15 years ago

Originally Posted by Chrismiksen

The fear of failure, I think, stems from society. Many people are taught from a very young age that failure is bad, and so people carry that mindset with them throughout their lives.

Whenever I hear that someone is afraid to fail, I always think back to the story of the IBM executive. When an executive at IBM made a $10 million mistake, he went to Tom Watson and said he was going to resign. Watson replied, "Are you kidding me? We just spent $10 million educating you."

I agree, if you let fear paralyze your IM efforts then you need to read the last part of this statement. With life/IM you should learn from others on a daily basis.
Success to All who desire to conquer their fears.

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sylviad 15 years ago

Consider how much you want this thing... whatever it is -

Why do you want it?

Don't think about success or failure. Just go for the experience.

When I decided to jump from a secretarial career to one in journalism, I made the decision and went for it. It was something I wanted to do. I'd had my fill of secretarial work and I knew my only way out was more education. I was a natural born writer, so journalism made sense. Fear never entered my head - at least, not until my first exams.

People repeatedly said how brave I was to attempt such a major life change at the age of 38. I didn't really understand what they meant or why they couldn't do the same if they so desired. My decision probably had more to do with my determination to do whatever I pleased, rather than being held back by anything. If I wanted it, I'd make it happen. And I did.

It would appear, from my experience anyway, that it's all in your mindset. Set your mind on your goal and get going. The results will all fall into place based on your commitment and efforts.

Fear is based in lack of confidence. Have confidence in your abilities, in being able to do what is necessary to make your dreams come true. Know that you can learn anything you need to make them a reality. Believe that the answers you need are there for your taking - either in books, on the internet, through this forum or from mentors. You're never really alone. Help is everywhere. All you have to do is ask!

Sylvia
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dacahe

15 years ago

Love the post and the comments,

I would disagree with you only on one point.

Looking at the two columns the succeeding side will not win the battle, I mean that's the problem don't you think?

You intellectually want it, but the brain is not wired for success that is not its DNA mandate, the brain is wired for survival, which leads to pleasure and pain.

In other words if you're at the dentist and he's working on your deep cavities, you intellectually know is good for you in the long run and that is much worse not to go, but you're brain is wired to avoid pain which is why we have to put the nerve to sleep.

Pain will most times win the battle.

The same thing with everyday activities. And this is where either knowledge and better yet accelerated failures in conjunction with applied knowledge is the key.

In that sense I do agree with you that overpowering yourself with emotions will work, add to that consistency, and you have a winning formula.

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hireava

15 years ago

Failure is part of success. Without it, we won't learn. It's something that we should also be grateful for. We feel proud about it if we gone through that stage and learned to stand up again.

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Mary McLean

15 years ago

Whenever I hear that someone is afraid to fail, I always think back to the story of the IBM executive. When an executive at IBM made a $10 million mistake, he went to Tom Watson and said he was going to resign. Watson replied, "Are you kidding me? We just spent $10 million educating you."

Part of a quote from previous post!

How cool is that?

I heard a firm in NZ will only hire managers who have been bankrupted previously, as they believe they are now the right mindset to know exactly how to manage much more accurately!I wonder how much our total education has cost to get us all this far?

Kindest...

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thekaver

15 years ago

The power of the universe and attraction says we attract what we focus on!

So be focusing on the fear to fail we attract failer.

Instead we need to focus of sucess and that way we attract success.

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bonnerkareem69

15 years ago

Everybody has the failure in their mind, some have tiny and some have in large quantity.

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Mary McLean

14 years ago

Wallace Wattles says, in his 100 year old book, that recognition of thought is a mental process.

"Everything that exists is some manifestation of this one basic substance(thought) from which and by which all things have been and are continually being re-created."

So, it behooves us to manage well, our thoughts!

Kindest...

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Jacko 14 years ago

If you are afraid to fail, you need to fail.
So fail fast!

Soichiro Honda (motorcycles, cars) failed

Henry Ford (cars) failed

Walt Disney (cartoon) failed

Albert Einstein (modern physics) failed

Jerry Seinfeld (comedian) failed

Charlie Chaplin (movies) failed

Steven Spielberg (movies) failed

Michael Jordan (basketball) failed

If they haven't had failed in the first place,
they wouldn't be that great!

check 50 Famously Successful People Who Failed At First:
50 Famously Successful People Who Failed At First | Online College Tips - Online Colleges
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PandaPoacher

14 years ago

You just need to push through the failure and learn from it. We all fail at times, and everything is not a guarantee, so we learn from our mistakes and failures and we fix the problems and move on.

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MarketExperience

14 years ago

So called failure is actually you learning what NOT to do so you can do what pushes you in the right direction and REAL failure is when you quit what you started

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CathyAnn

13 years ago

Originally Posted by MarketExperience

So called failure is actually you learning what NOT to do so you can do what pushes you in the right direction and REAL failure is when you quit what you started

A cool little thing I tell my clients...

Take the event you "failed" at.
List everything you learned from it.
Make a plan to avoid it in the future.
You now turned "failure" into "learning."
It's only failure if you didn't learn from it.

To your health, wealth and happiness!

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johnny125

14 years ago

Sometimes people learns on their mistakes, so you don't have to be affraid of failure

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Richest 14 years ago

It is said, the key to success is doing the way you are most afraid of
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alcymart

14 years ago

Here is my opinion...Like Steve Jobs put it, we are born alone and we die alone, what do we have to lose?

Also, you don't fear when you know. Walking with your eyes shut, you will fear hurting yourself, however with eyes open, the fear goes away. Knowledge of your surroundings makes the fear go away, simple as that. 1+1=2

With eyes shut you'll get hurt and learn your way around, the "Hard way" but eventually succeed because success is a consequence of the failure process.

Bernard St-Pierre

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mounds 14 years ago

Whenever I feel the fear of failure, I consider Cartesian logic:

1. What would happen if you did?

If I were to put the time into trying a system, the only real guarantee is that I put my time in! As a result of that, I would probably learn, have fun, and become a more skilled person.

2. What would happen if you didn't?

If I didn't work on a system, I wouldn't become more skilled in IM, I wouldn't have a chance of it working, and I'd find something else to fill my time, like television.

3. What wouldn't happen if you did?

I wouldn't be spending as much time on video games and television. I wouldn't be jumping from one system to the next. I might avoid meeting a predictable end (being that I never go anywhere due to my fear of failure).

4. What wouldn't happen if you didn't?

I wouldn't have to experience the failure of my system not working. I wouldn't use up my time on IM.

After writing that out, it sounds like the greater failure would be to do nothing. That's the only failure that scares me.

-Tim
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voncans

14 years ago

Afraid of failure is afraid of success.

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Nudefox 14 years ago

No such thing as failure but feedback.Go fail,fail,fail and NEVER stop failing.Take note of mistakes,rectify them and most importantly avoid repeating them.Only the dead are exempted from failing...
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jeresteem99

14 years ago

This good motivational reading already. sometimes, our peers are the failure pushers of what we want in life since they are afraid for us if we fail.

But certainly, we can take that as a challenge that if we only focus on what we want, it means, we can achieve it.

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gallowayvera

14 years ago

great thread

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abugah

14 years ago

I think fear is one of the biggest motivators. How you direct it is what matters. Even successful people are afraid of going broke and so they work hard to succeed.

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PrestonSr

13 years ago

fear of failure results in procrastination

my advice: keep forging forward after every failure and the fear will surely fade

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Mousumi

13 years ago

Tony is worth listening to.

Tony Robbins on Achieving Success After Failure -...

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eternalsongbird

13 years ago

Fear is always a negative thing. If this fear is for failure, then it is the worst. Failure will come, we will have to face it. But don't be afraid.

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socialassistant

13 years ago

Fear of Failure
There are several other reasons why the end game of selling is stressful and difficult. First and foremost is the fear of failure experienced by the prospect. Because of negative buying experiences in the past, over which you could have no control, prospects are conditioned to be suspicious, skeptical and wary of salespeople and sales approaches. They may like to buy, but they don't like to be sold. They are afraid of making a mistake. They are afraid of paying too much and finding it for sale cheaper somewhere else.

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juliuskersey

13 years ago

Failure is very human. It is the way we all learn and strive not to fail the second time around.

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sigmundeverlast

13 years ago

Afraid of failure is afraid to learn new things.

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leungwilkins

13 years ago

I would rather fear a ghost rather than failure. It makes more sense.

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eternalsongbird

13 years ago

The greatest fear on earth. If you even have the potential you wont be able to make a mark in fear of failure.

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eugenedm

13 years ago

Fear of failure is like a subconscious thing because people think perfection is beautiful and flaws are ugly. We have to wake up now and realize that failure is a big lesson for us. It's something that we should learn from on our path to success.

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TerranceCharles

13 years ago

Sometimes it's not always the case of fearing failure. Some people actually fear success, but you shouldn't fear failure, it gives you experience. You should fear not trying.