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I think you're are too stressed out or your mind is too occupied of so many things. You business included of course.

I also get to overwhelmed on that things that I need and want to do and most of the time if you include business on top of your job you'll end up messing something up. (It really happens)

That's why most of the company prohibits employee from doing extra sideline work because of that reason.

Maybe you can try clear your mind of your business when you are at work then try to write everything on the task that you need to do so you won't forget everything.

I agree with you completely. But that is almost impossible because my passion lies with my business and discovering new income streams, etc. Not with the meaningless work that I do while at the office.

The reason I have this job is because ultimately I fear failure, we all do. But being afraid is no excuse to do something that makes you miserable on a daily basis, so I am fighting my internal demons.

I can relate 100%. I was in a job where as others lost their jobs due to "downsizing," the responsibilities those people had were then split up among the remaining managers. This resulted in a "pile on" effect which absolutely damaged efficiency, and totally destroyed morale.

In the company I worked for, we had weekly meetings. This was back in 2008 when the economy was really bad and the industry I worked in (Travel & Tourism), was one of the hardest hit. In our meetings, the mantra became "do more with less." Now, if you sit down and really analyze that statement, you will come to understand it's really not possible in most instances. In fact, it doesn't even make sense. They upper management loved to use that term, but when asked to explain what it meant, they seemed to be at a loss for words most of the time. That's because in reality, one cannot really do MORE when they have LESS.

This is a common MO of many large, and even small, companies nowadays. They hire you under a certain job title and description, and as time goes on, they pile on more and more responsibility. However, all of this new responsibility usually NEVER comes with a raise in pay. Inevitably, the employee begins to experience exactly what's happening to the OP. The work load becomes impossible for one person, so the employee does what the OP did and prioritizes his/her work based on importance, which is the only logical thing an employee in these circumstances can do.

As time goes on, the employee falls farther and farther behind, and some tasks end up left undone and/or totally forgotten. This is not the employee's fault, as the employee has pretty much been left to accomplish the jobs of 2 or 3 people. The company, of course, still expects all of this work to be done in the same amount of hours, especially if the employee is paid hourly and overtime is involved. If the employee is salaried management, it normally results in the employee working far more than the standard 40-45 hours per week that the salary is based on.

This is exactly why when I ended up being "downsized" after I had worked myself to the bone thinking that the company would take care of me if I worked harder and took on more responsibility and did not ask for more pay, I vowed NEVER to work for anyone else ever again.

And I haven't...

It's just not worth it! My vision of what I want and understanding of how the world and the working class works just doesn't add up. Time for money is not the most efficient means of earning an income!

I took on this job because I really felt that it's something I needed to do to stay afloat, as well as the pressure from family members as well. Last summer I made a livable income from picking up a few freelance web design gigs as well as tutoring PC, MAC & Software skills and I loved it!

I've also been listening to Bob Proctor lately and he get's me so energized and hyped up that nothing can cloud my mind.

I know I need to quit and I will. Back in december I took the plunge and "dropped out" of Penn State University to pursue business ventures and the likes. I couldn't bring myself to shell out thousands of dollars that I didn't have to do exactly what I'm doing now! That was my biggest life change so far and life hasn't been better!

This will be my next major move and from that point. I vow to never be a typical employee again!

As for your pay raise statement. I definitely feel entitled to more pay for the results that I am producing. I wouldn't even have to worry about that if I was fully self sufficient.

Going down the path that you're going is a double edged sword in my opinion. You may think things will be better if your running the show, but that really depends on what type of person you are. If you are hyper focused and multi talented you may be able to pull it off, but if you don't or can't keep that up then watch out.

I think you sound a lot like me. The grass looks greener on the other side, but the question is, is it?

Running your own business is harder than what you are doing now. And it takes more responsibility than you are showing.

What's going on in here?