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Claude is so old....

by Kurt
43 replies
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Claude is so old....after watching Jurassic Park he said "That was nostalgic!".


Here's your birthday cake:
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    And please pull up your pants. We aren't going to spank you even if it is your birthday. We don't care that it was your wish when you blew out the candles.
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  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    OK - I'll take the bait....just how old IS Claude?
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  • Profile picture of the author Chris Brindamour
    LOL, thanks for the comic relief!

    Who's Claude by the way??

    Chris
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    • Profile picture of the author OptedIn
      Originally Posted by Chris Brindamour View Post

      Who's Claude by the way??
      The precursor to dirt.
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by Chris Brindamour View Post

      LOL, thanks for the comic relief!

      Who's Claude by the way??

      Chris

      Claude Whitacre is the legendary salesman whom all women want, and all men want to be like.

      If you take Kurt (please), and add charisma, humility, talent, intelligence and charm...you have Claude Whitacre.

      I'm 63 years old now....one year closer to the inevitable reward of eternal oblivion.
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      • Profile picture of the author OptedIn
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        I'm 63 years old now....one year closer to the inevitable reward of eternal oblivion.
        Promises, promises!
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      • Profile picture of the author Kurt
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        Claude Whitacre is the legendary salesman whom all women want, and all men want to be like.

        If you take Kurt (please), and add charisma, humility, talent, intelligence and charm...you have Claude Whitacre.

        I'm 63 years old now....one year closer to the inevitable reward of eternal oblivion.
        Since it's your birthday and I'm feeling generous, here's a little help that would have made your comment funnier. You should have said, "I'm like, smart and a very stable genius".

        I'm here to help...
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    • Profile picture of the author Kurt
      Originally Posted by Chris Brindamour View Post

      LOL, thanks for the comic relief!

      Who's Claude by the way??

      Chris
      It isn't who is Claude, it's really WHAT is Claude?
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

        It isn't who is Claude, it's really WHAT is Claude?
        Some of us also ponder why is Claude?
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by Chris Brindamour View Post

      LOL, thanks for the comic relief!

      Who's Claude by the way??

      Chris
      Claude is the personification of inconsequentiality.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by Chris Brindamour View Post

      LOL, thanks for the comic relief!

      Who's Claude by the way??

      Chris
      If Failure were a person, Claude's existence would make it feel good about itself.
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      Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Chris Brindamour View Post

    LOL, thanks for the comic relief!

    Who's Claude by the way??

    Chris
    Claude is the destroyer of worlds, (we all know that).

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  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    If I were Claude - I wouldn't talk to any of you. So mean - Happy B-Day, Mr C.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

      If I were Claude - I wouldn't talk to any of you. So mean - Happy B-Day, Mr C.
      If you were Claude, we wouldn't be making these jokes.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kurt
      Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

      If I were Claude - I wouldn't talk to any of you. So mean - Happy B-Day, Mr C.
      The cyber version of a pair of socks for a birthday present...
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    • Profile picture of the author OptedIn
      Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

      If I were Claude - I wouldn't talk to any of you.
      If you were Claude, we wouldn't be talking to you.
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

      If I were Claude - I wouldn't talk to any of you. So mean - Happy B-Day, Mr C.

      Kay;

      Thank you for coming to my defense. These guys are so mean. What have I ever done to deserve such treatment?

      I'm a kind gentle soul...., and very mentally stable. My two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart......... not smart, but genius....and a very stable genius at that!

      Originally Posted by OptedIn View Post

      If you were Claude, we wouldn't be talking to you.
      The fact that Kay thought that was funny means that we will no longer be dating. But you? I'll see you at the usual time. Better wear a boa, I'm in the mood.
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      • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        Kay;

        Thank you for coming to my defense. These guys are so mean. What have I ever done to deserve such treatment?

        I'm a kind gentle soul...., and very mentally stable. My two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart......... not smart, but genius....and a very stable genius at that!



        The fact that Kay thought that was funny means that we will no longer be dating. But you? I'll see you at the usual time. Better wear a boa, I'm in the mood.
        "I'm a kind gentle soul...., and very mentally stable. My two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart......... not smart, but genius....and a very stable genius at that!"

        Are you Trump's new Tweets ghostwriter?
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        Feel The Power Of The Mark Side

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        • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
          Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

          "I'm a kind gentle soul...., and very mentally stable. My two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart......... not smart, but genius....and a very stable genius at that!"

          Are you Trump's new Tweets ghostwriter?
          You are fake news. Sad.
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          • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            You are fake news. Sad.
            You forgot to add covfefe.
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      • Profile picture of the author Kurt
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        Kay;

        Thank you for coming to my defense. These guys are so mean. What have I ever done to deserve such treatment?

        I'm a kind gentle soul...., and very mentally stable. My two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart......... not smart, but genius....and a very stable genius at that!



        The fact that Kay thought that was funny means that we will no longer be dating. But you? I'll see you at the usual time. Better wear a boa, I'm in the mood.
        Here's a real stable genius:
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    BTW should it really be called a "birthday" when Claude was actually created by meiosis?
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    • Profile picture of the author OptedIn
      Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

      BTW should it really be called a "birthday" when Claude was actually created by meiosis?
      You sure that wasn't halitosis?
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      • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
        Originally Posted by OptedIn View Post

        You sure that wasn't halitosis?
        Or thrombosis?
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        Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
        So that blind people can hate them as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
    Claude isn't really that old, he just smells that way.
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    Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
    So that blind people can hate them as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

    You are fake news. Sad.
    There is no smoke without fire!

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  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
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    Claude is so old ... You can say anything about him (or to him) and he wouldn't care one iota.
    (Hah)

    Jonathan
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    • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
      Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

      Claude is so old ... You can say anything about him (or to him) and he wouldn't care one iota.
      (Hah)

      Jonathan
      Been trying to tell him that we are serious about the insults but he just does not seem to understand.
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      • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
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        Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

        Been trying to tell him that we are serious about the insults but he just does not seem to understand.
        Well He has always seemed like a cool Guy to me.
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        • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
          Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

          Well He has always seemed like a cool Guy to me.
          Claude thinks "George" from Walmart is a designer label.
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          • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
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            Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

            Claude thinks "George" from Walmart is a designer label.
            What you mean George isn't a designer label ????
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            • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
              Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

              What you mean George isn't a designer label ????
              Ahh, now I understand
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              • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
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                Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

                Ahh, now I understand
                We'll let you off.
                (Hehe)
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  • Profile picture of the author Princess Balestra
    Gotta figure age is merely eternal freshness reimagined with the flappier parts maxin' out sweeter on effortlessly constructive whamola.

    Or you want I jus' say MWAH?
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    Hey Claude...Did you notice how many times I brought up "birthday" on this thread, I wanted to make sure folks knew, and of all the people that posted only Kay actually said "Happy Birthday" to you?
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

      Hey Claude...Did you notice how many times I brought up "birthday" on this thread, I wanted to make sure folks knew, and of all the people that posted only Kay actually said "Happy Birthday" to you?
      Some of us had already wished him happy birthday elsewhere. Most of us, however, just didn't care.
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

      Hey Claude...Did you notice how many times I brought up "birthday" on this thread, I wanted to make sure folks knew, and of all the people that posted only Kay actually said "Happy Birthday" to you?
      That's because Kay is the only one here that has any class.


      Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

      Well He has always seemed like a cool Guy to me.
      Jonathan; That's very kind of you to say. I mean it.

      And now for the obligatory joke.

      And not only are you a great judge of character....Ahem!....but let's not forget that my two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart..... not just smart, but genius....and a very stable genius at that!


      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      Some of us had already wished him happy birthday elsewhere. Most of us, however, just didn't care.
      Did you know that this made me laugh more than any other insult? You have a way of hitting the exact right note. It's your complete dedication to apathy.
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post


        Did you know that this made me laugh more than any other insult? You have a way of hitting the exact right note. It's your complete dedication to apathy.


        Meh.





        ......
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