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What is Your Favorite Poison?

by tagiscom
78 replies
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This one comes close, (mud volcano, or it has hot chocolate in the middle).



And l will accept main meals as well.

  • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
    Cyanide. It can be used to mimic a heart attack.

    My guess is that it doesn't taste that good though. And frankly, I don't know where to buy it.

    So.....chocolate cake. It's slower, and tastes better.
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    • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
      Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

      Cyanide. It can be used to mimic a heart attack.

      My guess is that it doesn't taste that good though. And frankly, I don't know where to buy it.

      So.....chocolate cake. It's slower, and tastes better.
      I'm sure Kurt and I can help you with locating some Cyanide
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  • Profile picture of the author IGotMine
    Lead.


    It's cheap and fast-acting.
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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    why is there a can opener on the plate?

    according to the news article in the background both are fatal?
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  • Profile picture of the author healthfreak101
    Probably chocolate as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    >What is Your Favorite Poison?

    Sorry, none. I don't really care much for 80s hair metal bands.
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by IGotMine View Post

    Lead.

    It's cheap and fast-acting.
    We are not allowed to have hot lead in AU.

    Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

    why is there a can opener on the plate?

    according to the news article in the background both are fatal?
    Can opener, sffft,...no it is a fork, and one that l had to clean the chocolate off of,

    But the newspaper always tends to have plenty of laughs!

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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

    why is there a can opener on the plate?

    <snip>
    Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

    <snip>

    Can opener, sffft,...no it is a fork, and one that l had to clean the chocolate off of,

    <snip>
    No, I can clearly see it is a can opener. Man, you Aussies are tough people. Mean that in a good way.
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

      No, I can clearly see it is a can opener. Man, you Aussies are tough people. Mean that in a good way.
      Idiots. It's a motor mount flange from a 1956 Hoover vacuum cleaner.

      I wondered where it went to. Now I know.
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      • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        Idiots. It's a motor mount flange from a 1956 Hoover vacuum cleaner.

        I wondered where it went to. Now I know.
        Nonsense, that's a Flange Gasket from a Riccar 1962. Built a year before they introduced the real Goatie Hair brush head. Just look at the Grommit configuration man.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

      No, I can clearly see it is a can opener. Man, you Aussies are tough people. Mean that in a good way.
      I thought you were correct at first, but it's a fork. You can see the tines entering the cake.*











      *Claude thinks "You can see the tines entering the cake" is the most erotic sentence every written.
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      • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        I thought you were correct at first, but it's a fork. You can see the tines entering the cake.*
        To be fair, Australians use forks to open cans. And envelopes.




        And conversations.
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        • Profile picture of the author Princess Balestra
          Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

          To be fair, Australians use forks to open cans. And envelopes.

          Where in hell is Oziboomah?


          Tellya, that guy figures an Origami boomerang outta sum envelope, prolly he can pierce medieval frickin' armor from 50 paces.
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        • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
          Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

          To be fair, Australians use forks to open cans. And envelopes.




          And conversations.
          Fake news. To operate a fork you need opposable thumbs.
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      • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        *Claude thinks "You can see the tines entering the cake" is the most erotic sentence every written.
        That is true. I think it's the best thing you have ever written. The bar is set low.

        The most erotic thing I ever heard was "She's still warm".
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        • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
          Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

          The most erotic thing I ever heard was "She's still warm".
          In reference to a doughnut...
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  • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
    Is that water on the table? You realize more people have drowned in water than in coffee or chocolate cake?*




    *Claude's fantasy notwithstanding
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

      Is that water on the table? You realize more people have drowned in water than in coffee or chocolate cake?*

      *Claude's fantasy notwithstanding
      I know l need a backup!

      But it is filtered!

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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

    No, I can clearly see it is a can opener. Man, you Aussies are tough people. Mean that in a good way.
    Yeee's,.....it is actually a toothpick, but don't quote me.

    Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

    Idiots. It's a motor mount flange from a 1956 Hoover vacuum cleaner.

    I wondered where it went to. Now I know.
    No Claude it is actually one from a 1957 Hoover Vacuum Cleaner,....l wanted to keep you up all night, chain smoking, asking your cat's, "which is it" and making multiple take out orders for coffee and donuts. I guess my evil plans have been thwarted, (l know Dan, l have failed).

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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    What is that big glob of white stuff on top of the mud volcano? Now we know why you were looking at the cutie in the news paper. Shame on you Shane.

    Seriously though, here we see that on every cow ranch. Its just missing the corn.



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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

    What is that big glob of white stuff on top of the mud volcano? Now we know why you were looking at the cutie in the news paper. Shame on you Shane.
    We don't get snow in AU, so have to improvise! PS l knew that l shouldn't have left that page open?

    Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

    I thought you were correct at first, but it's a fork. You can see the tines entering the cake.*

    *Claude thinks "You can see the tines entering the cake" is the most erotic sentence every written.
    It was the best of tines!

    Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

    To be fair, Australians use forks to open cans. And envelopes.

    And conversations.
    How dare you sir, l will have you know that we also use them in self defense,.....when a drop bear comes through your ceiling you have to be ready!

    Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

    In reference to a doughnut...
    ...from the fridge!

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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post


      ...from the fridge!
      Claude doesn't own a fridge. There's no need.
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      • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        Claude doesn't own a fridge. There's no need.
        Claude thinks TV Dinners is going to lunch, dressed in womens clothes.
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      • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        Claude doesn't own a fridge. There's no need.
        Be honest, you've been holding on to that gem for a year.....Well done.

        Seriously, how can you be that witty..and still look the way that you do?
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        Claude doesn't own a fridge. There's no need.
        But he does have a large collection of High Energy Food Bars,.....

        Snickers, Hershey Bars, Kit Kat, (his cats like that one).

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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom


    More poison, but good poison!

    This is called a "Mietta", just in case there are any French about?

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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    What kind of cake (flavor) is it Shane?
    It's got pimples?
    Was it yummy?
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

      What kind of cake (flavor) is it Shane?
      It's got pimples?
      Was it yummy?
      It is layers of sponge, and some kind of moose filling, laced with Irish Cream,....alcohol, with soft biscuits on the outside.

      And some gold on top, but l never eat that!

      Very yummy, and one of my favorites.

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      • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
        Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

        It is layers of sponge, and some kind of moose filling
        Yikes. Well, that beats cow pie.
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  • Profile picture of the author IGotMine
    some kind of moose filling
    Is it made with real moose?

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  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    I think you mean mousse - otherwise, might as well be mouse droppings
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  • Profile picture of the author Princess Balestra
    Anywan evah eaten Moose AKA?

    It is a real traditional Graeco-Canadian dish don't got nuthin' in it like you would evah expect.

    "You want antlers, here's feta cheese softness; you want way crazy nostrils, here's flavor gonna pack big smiles on your frickin' face so's your nose don't know which way to twitch."

    Moose AKA.

    Tastes Like Sumthin' You Always Wanted & Never Knew.
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  • Profile picture of the author MikeTucker
    I'm from Texas, so I enjoy BBQ rattlesnake. Usually without the poison, though.
    I also love seafood, but pufferfish isn't great. (There's a Claude joke in there somewhere?)

    Most cyanide tastes like almonds so again, Texas... I prefer pecans and brazil nuts.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by MikeTucker View Post

      I'm from Texas, so I enjoy BBQ rattlesnake. Usually without the poison, though.
      I also love seafood, but pufferfish isn't great. (There's a Claude joke in there somewhere?)

      Most cyanide tastes like almonds so again, Texas... I prefer pecans and brazil nuts.
      Pecans are good. I'm a cashew and pistachio guy, myself.
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      • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        Pecans are good. I'm a cashew and pistachio guy, myself.


        Shh, don't tell the ladies. Make em find out themselves.
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      • Profile picture of the author Kurt
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        Pecans are good. I'm a cashew and pistachio guy, myself.
        My two favorites too. I started eating a lot of nuts and seeds after I learned you can get the same nutrition from them as you can from vegetables and I like pistachios and cashews (and others) a lot more than kale and spinach.
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        • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
          Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

          My two favorites too. I started eating a lot of nuts and seeds after I learned you can get the same nutrition from them as you can from vegetables and I like pistachios and cashews (and others) a lot more than kale and spinach.
          Great. Now I know that you and Riffle like Pistachios and Cashews.

          I love them both and eat them by the handfuls. But from now on, I'll be a little nauseated knowing that we three have this in common.

          Maybe I'll try eating ricks. I suppose you both like rocks as well.....

          Jeesh!
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          • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Great. Now I know that you and Riffle like Pistachios and Cashews.

            I love them both and eat them by the handfuls. But from now on, I'll be a little nauseated knowing that we three have this in common.

            Maybe I'll try eating ricks. I suppose you both like rocks as well.....

            Jeesh!
            I would advise against stealing Rick's food, he's a mean guy.

            I always knew I was talking to three nutcases
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          • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Maybe I'll try eating ricks.

            Jeesh!
            What's to try? I'm sure you've eaten a few ricks in your day.
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            • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
              Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

              What's to try? I'm sure you've eaten a few ricks in your day.

              Damn it! Old age, failing eyesight, and typing too fast.

              Oh, by the way..

              Shut up.

              I meant to say Rock...although I know what you were thinking, you evil garden gnome, you.
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            • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
              Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

              What's to try? I'm sure you've eaten a few ricks in your day.
              Just as long as he didn't use a fork?

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  • Profile picture of the author Riaz Ahmad
    my favorite poison is love <3
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    Remember when they used to color pistachios red? I'm pretty sure they used the same red dye banks use to mark bank robbers.

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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    Shane, dieting? Miss your posts dude!
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

      Shane, dieting? Miss your posts dude!
      Ok, Jeffery, here is one from TGI Fridays, which l believe originated in New York, so most should relate to this one.



      Or the cheap chocolate brownie.

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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    Reminds of the brownies my sister made in her easy bake oven in the '60s.

    They are done if you wants some?
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    The worst death is from claudelock. It emits a putrid stench causing all within range to die from nausea and extreme gagging.
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    • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
      Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

      The worst death is from claudelock. It emits a putrid stench causing all within range to die from nausea and extreme gagging.
      Doctors have confirmed it is highly infectious and you can catch it off a toilet seat if Claude has been sitting on it. Many potential customers have died after using the restroom at the SS. and a public health warning has gone out regarding the public restrooms in the area which Claude frequents. (for many hours)
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

        Doctors have confirmed it is highly infectious and you can catch it off a toilet seat if Claude has been sitting on it. Many potential customers have died after using the restroom at the SS. and a public health warning has gone out regarding the public restrooms in the area which Claude frequents. (for many hours)
        WHAT! You mean the Wooster Brush Company is off limits!



        Another tourist landmark gone!

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  • Profile picture of the author paid4
    I do not take much sweets but I really love donuts.
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by paid4 View Post

      I do not take much sweets but I really love donuts.
      Claude will be pleased!



      With the obvious question why read that paper? I am a big Garfield fan, and overall, value!

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      • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
        Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

        With the obvious question why read that paper?
        The obvious question is actually why you make that paper the centrepiece of the photo. The cake and latte are peripheral to the shot. The paper is the focus of attention.

        Why?
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        • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
          Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post

          The obvious question is actually why you make that paper the centrepiece of the photo. The cake and latte are peripheral to the shot. The paper is the focus of attention.

          Why?
          Agreed that the material on the front of the paper may be too negative to post, so it has been blurred, thankyou for bringing that discrepancy to my attention.....

          have a nice day.

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          • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
            Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

            Agreed that the material on the front of the paper may be too negative to post, so it has been blurred, thankyou for bringing that discrepancy to my attention.....

            have a nice day.
            SMFH.

            Another prime example of you shifting the goal posts to claim victory after you lose.

            You know as well as everyone else that I was not referring to the front page (presented here unredacted).

            https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EI9aVPfUwAIjYMq?format=jpg
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      • Profile picture of the author Kurt
        Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

        I am a big Garfield fan, and overall, value!
        Scooby Doo > Garfield

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        • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
          Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

          Scooby Doo > Garfield
          Not aware that Scooby Doo, had Garfield, but this is the one l like...

          https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Garfield



          I thought that l would put the Financial Times up top this time, but l have to admit that l also read the Herald Sun for the Horoscopes.

          The Financial Times does not have either of the above, but it does have information that might affect the ASX, or industry and innovation in AU.

          And the dessert is called ....groan can't remember it, but it is chocolate and mousse, (least l got that right).

          Perfect antidote for one of those days, and blocking out the world, as is a lighthearted thread!
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          • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
            Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

            I thought that l would put the Financial Times up top this time, but l have to admit that l also read the Herald Sun for the Horoscopes.!
            You obviously have difficulty in reading. The name of the publication is The Australian Financial Review. The Financial Times is published in London.
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        • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
          Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

          Scooby Doo > Garfield
          Funny you should mention that!

          https://www.mlive.com/life-and-cultu...comic-con.html

          45 minutes for Petrol, lol.

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    • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
      Originally Posted by paid4 View Post

      I do not take much sweets but I really love donuts.
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  • Profile picture of the author codingku
    for me its instant noodle
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  • Profile picture of the author Marque
    those both look amazinggg
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Harrington
    I am a simple guy....A nice glass of well made Port is perfect for a cold Winter night.
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  • Profile picture of the author Jeffery
    My wife's 'Tiramisu' with a unique flavor.

    An Italian dessert consisting of layers of homemade sponge cake soaked in Whisper Creek Tennessee Whiskey Sipping Cream with Lavazza powdered coffee beans brewed in-house and mascarpone cheese.


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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Jeffery View Post

      My wife's 'Tiramisu' with a unique flavor.

      An Italian dessert consisting of layers of homemade sponge cake soaked in Whisper Creek Tennessee Whiskey Sipping Cream with Lavazza powdered coffee beans brewed in-house and mascarpone cheese.
      I had that a few days ago, still recovering.

      I can see your arm in the spoon Jeffery, don't let your professionalism wane!

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